


Happy Accidents

by Rhino (RhinoMouse)



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: America Ninja Warrior, Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Aunt May and Pepper do not Deserve This, BAMF Darcy Lewis, BAMF Skye | Daisy Johnson, Civil War needs to be shot in the head, Daisy is Full of Angst, Darcy Lewis is Tony Stark's Daughter, Darcy/Peter/Daisy are siblings, Gen, He Gets Hero Training Wheels, PR is Important, Peter Parker is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Peter is a teen, Season 4 of Agent of SHIELD, Sibling Fluff, Skye | Daisy Johnson is Tony Stark's Daughter, Spiderman PS4 Game World Building Borrowed Shamelessly, The Accords, The Stark Kids Are All Smart In Different Ways, The Timeline is What I Say It Is, ships are not the focus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:40:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 40
Words: 142,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26455042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RhinoMouse/pseuds/Rhino
Summary: Tony Stark may have been religious about using protection through the years. Unfortunately condoms do break, also failure rates go up when drunk or otherwise intoxicated. This means well, it was rather inevitable.Daisy was not expecting three hits when she ran her DNA against the SHIELD database. Which complicated feelings on the whole issue or not, well her apparent baby brother just started stopping crime in his pajamas. So if she takes a month, she's on the run from SHIELD post Hive anyways, and helps the kid out it doesn't have to mean anything. Really, she's completely going to be able to leave without regrets. Totally. And if she ends up looping in their apparent older sister, it's for Peter.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Pietro Maximoff, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Skye | Daisy Johnson & Peter Parker & Darcy Lewis, Wanda Maximoff/Skye | Daisy Johnson
Comments: 1520
Kudos: 1964





	1. Aunt May Needs a Drink

**Author's Note:**

> So this fic breaks down into like three distinctive parts/archs. So the first five chapters are mostly part one. So it's going to be longer than five chapters. I'm just not totally done with the chapters for the whole thing yet. It is all outlined and partially done though. So heads up on the length stretching. 
> 
> There are going to be pairings but I'm not there yet so they might change. But once I have them settled properly in the draft I'll add those tags. But this fic focuses on the siblings.

May Parker was curious when she heard the doorbell. She wasn’t expecting anyone. Shaking the water off her hands she grabbed a dish towel while making her way to the door. “COMING!” Drying her hands she opened the door. “Hello, can I help you?”

“My name is Daisy Johnson and I need to talk to you about your nephew Peter.” The newly proclaimed Daisy was a young woman, early twenties, dark hair under a knit cap, leather jacket, flannel, torn jeans, too dark make-up, and pain practically oozing out of her.

May knew instinctively that this person was scared. “What about Peter?” She didn’t open the door further.

“This is uh… best not to be talked about in the open.” Daisy’s eyes glanced furtively. “I promise I’m here to help.” 

May tightened her hold of the dishtowel. But Peter. She stepped back. “He hasn’t gotten into any trouble has he?” 

“Not like you’re thinking.” Daisy stepped in neatly. She turned, seeing the door still open. Her hand raised and the door shut without a single touch. 

She startled back. “You’re one of them.” 

“Inhuman.” Daisy rubbed at one arm. “I promise I’m not going to hurt you.” 

May had been around kids long enough to see several things she hadn’t picked up on first look. The clothing Daisy was wearing was all slept in, the dark circles under her eyes the make-up was trying to cover, the bruising on her hands. There were the faintest remnants of a black eye hidden with make-up. “We don’t want any trouble.” 

“I…” Daisy bit at her lower lip and then pulled out a phone and offered it over. “I’ve been keeping an eye on Peter and..I’m sorry I didn’t realize till now, put the pieces together. But he’s got powers. I don’t know how. He doesn’t have Inhuman genetic markers-”

May side stepped closer to a lamp. If she could get to the lamp. “Genetics? How-” 

“Middle school, they took DNA samples as part of their cultural backgrounds project. SHIELD filed it away into their database. Never did anything with it. Bureaucracy is the worst.” Daisy’s lips twitched slightly. “But well I ran a search that included those old files and Peter’s pinged.” 

She stopped in her approach to the lamp. “Why did it ping?” 

“Not because he’s part alien like me, but because we share a certain level of commonality.” Daisy looked positively sick. “We share a father. Perfectly human one.” 

She let her fingers wrap around the base of the lamp that was now behind her. “You said Peter has powers?” Oh god, if that was true people would try and take him away from her. She wouldn’t let that happen. Now to somehow smash this lamp over the Inhuman in her living room.

“You know the Spiderman? The one who’s been helping people for the last two weeks?” Daisy shifted, her shoulders tight. “I found this.” She tilted her phone screen so that the video on it was visible. 

May released the lamp and grabbed the phone from Daisy’s hand. Because there was shitty security footage of Peter changing into red and blue sweats. She pressed a hand to her chest as it dawned on her exactly what that meant. “I’m going to kill that boy! I knew he was keeping secrets after Ben, but this is...He could get hurt!” 

“Hey that’s why I’m here.” Daisy patted her shoulder before drawing back with a jerk. “I just want to help. I’ve deleted all the footage already. No one will find out how I did.” 

She pressed the heel of a hand against her forehead. “I’m sorry, did you try to say you’re related to Peter?” 

“Half-sister technically. Apparently Tony Stark seduced a lot of married women. Including your sister and my mom among others…” Daisy toed at the carpet. 

May opened and then shut her mouth. She knew her sister had had an affair before Peter. It had been nothing...but the timeline was close enough. But Tony Stark? “Why should I believe you?” 

“Look I’m just here to help. I don’t know how he got his but well.” Daisy shrugged. “I can help make sure you can keep the two of you off anyone’s radar. Oh and I have the DNA results.”

She lowered her hand. May considered the girl, and god she was barely older than a child herself. “Why come to me and not Peter?” 

“Because you love him.” Daisy replied simply. 

////

Peter stopped in his tracks as he realized there was someone in their apartment. He raised a single hand. “Hi?” 

Sitting in the ‘guest’ chair was a girl who was basically inhaling what looked like an entire pan of lasagna. And she wasn’t like one of May’s friends, she looked cool. Like fishnet long sleeves with a flannel shirt, sleeves cut off over the top. Clunky jewelry, black hair, ripped jeans, dark makeup. She was just missing a guitar or something. LIke cool biker, garage band girl. The sorta senior at school who didn’t even acknowledge his existence. 

She apparently didn’t know she wasn’t supposed to acknowledge his existence. She raised a single hand up, just as awkwardly as him. “Sup.” 

“Oh thank god you’re home safe.” Aunt May was suddenly there hugging him tightly. One arm yanking him to her around the back, her other hand pressed to the back of his head. “I was so worried.” 

“Aunt May?” His cheeks burned as his voice came out as more of a squeak than anything else.

She shushed him, holding him tighter. Finally, she petted his head and pushed him back, hands on both shoulders. “You are in so much trouble young man!” 

“What?” His eyes flicked to the cool girl who was staring at them in a sort of muted horror, fork lifted halfway to her mouth. Nope, he was so never going to be cool at school… But then as his eyes flicked back to May he shrunk slightly. Oh, he was in that type of trouble...but why? “I didn’t do anything?” 

“Oh you call swinging around in your sweats, stopping car accidents, nothing!?” May shook him slightly. “What do you think would happen if you got hurt!” 

Peter paled. “What? I wouldn’t do that.” 

“You have been sneaking out to be Spiderman. What the fuck Peter?” May crossed her arms as she looked at him. “I thought we told each other things.” 

He froze as he realized his aunt was going to start crying. “We do! I just wanted to protect you!” 

“I’m the adult here Peter! And risking your life.” She yanked him back into a tighter hug. 

Peter hugged her back. “I’m sorry Aunt May.” 

“You never lie to me about something this big again.” May chided, her voice thick with emotion. “I can’t lose you.” 

He hugged her back. Peter cracked an eye open and realized there was still someone else in their apartment. “Um...Aunt May who?” 

“Oh that’s your sister. She’s here to help.” May turned and smiled at the girl. “Do you want some juice?”

The girl smiled at May. “Juice is good.” 

“Wait...Sister?!” 

“So you’re a former secret spy agent, hacker, and have superpowers?!” Peter starred in awe, oh god she was cool! 

A soft smile pulled at her as she ducked slightly. “Yeah, it’s been a crazy couple of years.” 

“Have you met Captain America?” Peter leaned forward excited. This was cool. His dad was apparently Ironman which...was complicated. 

She smiled properly then. “No, but I’ve met Sif, one of Thor’s personal warriors. And she kicks ass.” 

“That’s so cool! Can I meet her?” Peter felt like bouncing, the other kids in school would never believe this! 

Daisy flinched slightly. “No one can know I’m here. You don’t exactly resign from SHIELD. Well not when you have powers.” 

“Wait, so if they find out where you are what will happen?” Peter asked. 

She twisted the flannel of her shirt. “Right now there’s a power vacuum. A lot of agents were crippled or killed. Good people. And that means leadership is changing. I was able to get out while that was happening. But the new Director, well he believes in bagging and tagging people with powers. I need to make a difference, help people. Not sit in a lab and let them study me.” 

“You said you were the leader of a team though?” May frowned as she held her mug of hot cocoa.

Daisy rubbed at her forearm slightly. “I was. But things happened and… well let’s say being mind-controlled by evil kills goodwill inside of an organization.” 

“Mind control is real!” Peter pulled back at the haunted look on his new sister’s face. He’d stuck his foot in it again. “Or well that’s not that cool...or interesting. So um...Well you said I wasn’t the only person you found who was related to you. So like are there others?” 

Daisy’s expression softened back out. “One other. Her name is Darcy Lewis. She’s getting her doctorate in mechanical engineering. She majored in political science for her undergrad but got into a graduate engineering program after she graduated.” 

“Does she have powers like us?” Peter was still so excited that his sister had powers just like him! He wasn’t alone. And May seemed ok with the idea of his powers. Not that he ever thought she’d be mad at him...but freaking out a lot less than expected. 

Daisy shook her head. “As far as I can tell she’s pretty normal. Had an internship with Jane Foster and might have met Thor. But otherwise the most normal out of the three of us. Grew up with a single mom, works as a waitress to help make ends meet now that she’s in school. No warrants out for her arrest either.” 

“Don’t go getting any ideas young man.” May gave him a pointed look from over her mug. “I have gotten more grey hairs today.” 

Peter smiled as he picked up his own mug. “I don’t think I’d do well in jail anyways.” 

“I haven’t actually been to jail.” Daisy cocked her head to the side before shrugging. “Don’t do as I do kid.” 

He snickered. “So you can help me with my powers?” 

“Yeah, I can also teach you how to defend yourself. Help you and your aunt set up some evacuation points in case your powers get outed. Make sure you have some alarms set up. But once all that’s set I’ll get out of your hair. You’re safer that way.” She shifted awkwardly. 

Peter wanted to protest, but May was giving him the ‘shut it’ look. Which meant something was happening his rambles might mess up. “Sounds cool. Uh..how’re you going to show me stuff?” 

“There’s an old shipping yard that’s abandoned. Company went bankrupt and hasn’t been bought up yet. It’ll be safe for us to practice there.” She shot a look at May and then looked back at him. “And no Spiderman till you can take care of yourself and I’ll run back up to make sure you’re safe.” 

Peter wasn’t even upset, he was gonna get super secret agent training. “Do I get to use a gun?” 

“Absolutely not!” May cut in. 

Daisy looked amused. “I’ll pick you up after school and we can see what you can do. Sound good?” 

“I expect both of you home in time for dinner.” Aunt May gave Daisy a pointed look. “I know my lasagna isn’t good enough for you to have eaten it that fast.” 

Daisy sunk further into her chair, but there was a faint smile on her face as she did it. “Yes Aunt May.” 

“You can just call me May.” Aunt May pointed out. 

Daisy shook her head. “My S.O.’s name was May. It’s...complicated.” 

“Alright, but you better not call me ma’am.” Aunt May was smiling, and everything felt like it was going to be alright. 

Daisy smirked. “I’m not much of the ma’aming type.” 

“Now where were you planning on staying tonight?” Aunt May asked after a pointed look at the clock. 

Daisy stretched before sliding onto her feet. “I’ve got a van outside.” 

“You’re sleeping in a van?” Aunt May’s danger tone was out. To the uninitiated it sounded mildly insulted. Peter knew better. He tried to signal the danger to his sister. It was too late. 

She grinned. “Yeah, got it for like two hundred bucks. Reminds me of old times.” 

“A VAN!?” Aunt May yelped in horror.

////

Peter was practically vibrating out of his seat as he waited for the final bell. Skipping the robotics club would be so worth it. His foot bounced anxiously. Why was the clock so slow, like the arms were ticking painfully slowly. “Come on…” 

“Dude, Mr Baker is gonna hear you.” Ned hissed at him.

He glanced at their seventh period history teacher. Yup, he was still nodding off as he graded their last round of essays at his desk. So he was good. “Mr Baker never pays attention to us. Besides schools almost out!” 

“This is so weird. We’re the nerds who like school.” Ned blinked rather bemusedly at him. He perked up suddenly. “Did you meet a girl?” 

Peter’s cheeks went bright red. “No! Well yes, but not like that and it’s just all very complicated.” 

“You met a girl and didn’t tell me?” Ned leaned forward.

He winced, desperately hoping his friend would shut up. But Daisy was so awesome! “She’s family.” 

“Oh.” Ned slumped slightly. 

Flash had apparently heard part of their conversation, as his snide tone carried. “Oh, is Peter’s secret girlfriend a hot senior from a different school? Is she from Canada and we’ll never see her?” 

“She’s not my girlfriend!” Peter hissed, his cheeks heating up, that was so wrong. 

Flash snickered. “Duh, nobody is going to date you.” 

“She’s not a senior, she’s twenty one.” Peter grumbled. God could the last few ticks of the clock be done with anyways?!

Flash laughed. “Oh a college girl! Yeah right.” The rest of the class was laughing now. “Guess we know what’s in your spank bank now.” 

“SHE’S MY SISTER!” Peter yelped, this was so wrong. 

“Quiet!” Mr Baker finally had noticed the commotion. 

The whole class settled. It didn’t take long for the man to go back to his grading. Instead of bored sleepiness the class was now filled with energy, bright eyes waiting for it. Flash deemed it safe first. He flicked his hair slightly. “You don’t have a sister Parker.” 

“Half sister, she’s like really cool.” Peter defended.

Ned’s face scrunched up. “You’re an only child Peter?” 

“Well I have a sister and she’s really cool, and she’s picking me up from school today. So you’ll...you’ll see.” Peter tried to lift his chin, it ended up more of a nervous jerk. 

He was saved by the bell, literally the end of period bell went off. 

Peter grabbed his backpack and made a break for it. He was going to embarrass Daisy if his classmates kept this up. Hopefully he could just hop into her van and they could avoid all social interaction with his classmates. He jogged, slipping side to side to avoid colliding with the halls as they began to fill with students. 

He was among the first out of the doors. Hopping down the stairs Peter spotted Daisy. She stood out. Beat up old van, rocker grunge look, there she was leaning against her car. Beside the parents here to pick up their kids she stood out. Peter beamed, she’d really come. He sped up till he came skidding to a halt just beside her. “Daisy!” 

“Hey kid.” Daisy stuffed her phone into her pocket and stepped forward before rocking back as her hands slid into her pockets. “Ready to go?” 

Peter nodded excitedly. “It’s gonna be awesome!” He clamored into the van with a wide grin. Glancing out the window he felt kinda smug at the shocked looks on his classmates faces. He purposely waved goodbye to Ned. 

Daisy made a sound of amusement as she settled into the driver's seat. “Need me to take care of any bullies for you? I can destroy their social media, give their parents some outstanding parking tickets.” 

“You can do that?” Peter knew he was ok at computers, and Ned was even better. But neither of them could do that. 

She shot him a smug look while starting up the van and pulling into traffic. “I can do so much more than that.” 

He grinned. “So what’s first? Like how to throw a punch? Or maybe like super spy tackling?” 

“Tai Chi actually.” Daisy’s hula dancer bobbled with the rough ride of the van. “It will help you get a better sense of where your limbs are, general body awareness, and control of yourself.” She turned them away from Queens. “It’s what my SO started me on. Well my second SO. But my first one ended up being a Nazi so we’re not following his example.”

Peter paused at her tone. “What does SO mean? I mean I think I get the idea but I don’t know the acronym.” 

“Supervisory Officer.” Daisy replied, checking her mirrors slightly more than he was used to Aunt May or school bus drivers doing...maybe it was a spy thing? “Typically you’re trained first and then given an SO to help train you as a type of on the job training thing. But everything was a bit backwards for me.” 

He twisted his hands in the straps of his backpack. “Why was it backwards for you?” 

“Cause SHIELD didn’t recruit me, they black bagged me.” Her tone turned playful. “It was all ‘join us or go to prison’. Very dramatic, spy organizations don’t like hacktivists very much.” 

Peter gaped. “Wait, you were so good they made you an agent?” 

“Yup.” She looked over at him and winked. “And I got caught on purpose.” 

“No way.” 

Peter panted as he lowered the shipping crate he’d been bench pressing. Rolling out of the way he dropped it onto the cement. “Why?” 

“Need to be able to measure what you’re capable of.” Daisy smiled. 

He looked at his sister and was excited. “Can you show me what you can do?” 

“Sure.” Daisy raised an arm and sent the empty shipping container sliding six feet back. She hissed grabbing her forearm. “Sorry, it’s hard to use my powers right now.” 

“Why?” He cocked his head to the side. 

////

May gaped at her nephew’s half-sister. “YOUR BONES ARE SHATTERED!?!” 

“It’s just fractures.” Daisy shifted from one foot to the other. 

She choked. “WHAT THE FUCK.” May ran a hand through her hair. “What the fuck... Just what the fuck.” 

“I can still protect you and Peter. And I’ll only be here for a month to help make sure you're secure.” Daisy winced slightly. “I can leave sooner if you believe that’s necessary. A week even would let me help get things organized for you.” 

“That’s not the issue!” May stared at the girl...and oh god she didn’t know better. May met people like Daisy in her work with the local homeless shelter. But she met people like this. People so horrifically damaged by their pasts that they didn’t understand basic human kindness or concern properly. But seeing it in a girl with the same warm brown eyes as Peter, who so clearly hadn’t let it stop her from being kind. 

Daisy’s head tilted to the side. “What is the issue?” 

“That you are hurt. That you’re hurting yourself.” May begged silently for Daisy to understand.

Daisy clearly didn’t understand. “It’s not that bad. Mostly micro fractures. Once I’ve finished helping you two I can acquire some bone growing steroids. They repair the damage.” 

She pinched the bridge of her nose, ignoring the wide-eyed and horrified expression on Peter’s face. May breathed in. “And sleeping in the van. How long have you been doing that?” 

“Oh since I ran away from the system at fifteen. Then SHIELD picked me up two years later so then bunk on the plane, then we were on the run from Hydra so hotel rooms, then the base so bunk, and now I’m on the run again so back to the van.” Daisy shrugged as if that made things ok. 

May stepped forward and dropped a hand on Daisy’s shoulder. “You’re sleeping on the couch. No arguments.” She cut in before the girl could try to argue that point. “And you’re eating three square meals a day. Also we’re going to talk about why I suddenly have fifty thousand in my savings account because I did not have that in my savings account last night.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Daisy replied instantly while Peter made an odd squawking sound. 

She raised a brow. “You're a good liar. Lie to me again and I’ll ground you young lady. Don’t think I won’t do it.” May grabbed a throw blanket and wrapped it around the girl’s shoulders. “Did your...team? Let you use your powers when it hurt you?” 

“Well yes.” Daisy shrugged. “I had gauntlets that acted as shock absorbers, but they had GPS in them.” 

Peter perked up. “Do you know how they were built? Titanium base obviously, or maybe not. The weight could be a hindrance.” His eyes were lit with a curious light.

“Woah, woah, woah.” Daisy held up a hand with a laugh. “I don’t know any of that nerd.” She reached out and ruffled his hair. “Dropped outta highschool, and I was failing science before that.” 

Peter’s face scrunched up. “But you can hack?”

“Hacking is different than science. Like uh I don’t have a clue about like elements, chemicals, phosphorus...whatever all that stuff is. The science monkeys take care of that. Like Fitzsimmons. They do their science mumbo jumbo and I do the hacking and ass-kicking.” 

Peter grabbed Daisy’s arm and dragged her down onto the couch with him. “What did they look like? Do you have pictures, can you draw it? I could try and make you new ones. Oh if we used an electrical stimulation it might accelerate the rate of bone growth too!” 

“You’ve made shock absorbing gauntlets with electrical mumbo jumbo before?” Daisy looked at him dubiously. 

Peter wilted slightly. “Well no, and I don’t have the equipment. But if we broke into the school after hours-”

“Absolutely not young man!” May cut in. “You are not breaking into the school and stealing.” 

Daisy paused. “Wait, how do you make your webs?” 

“In chemistry class?” Peter warily replied.

May turned on her nephew. “You’ve been stealing from the chemistry lab!?” 

“Just a little…” Peter held out his hand, two fingers squished together to show how little he’d been taking. 

Daisy spoke up, her voice halting. “I could get you a...chemistry set? Or like just chemicals?”

“Speaking of money, fifty-thousand?” May turned on the girl. “Did you steal it?: 

Daisy’s eyes widened. “No! I mean I set up a program that stole .05 of the top 100 businesses in the US to fund SHIELD. But no, that was my moola. Or well I suppose the money I stole for SHIELD was used to pay most of my paychecks so technically...but they were bad people with cruel business practices.” 

“Well then.” May breathed in, and then breathed out. “It’s your money, you are not just putting it in my account. Fuck.” 

Daisy’s expression turned stubborn...it was eerily similar to Peter’s. “Nope.” Her lips pulled up in a sly grin. “I’m sure I could funnel more in if you want.” 

“Just.” May held up a hand. “We’re talking about this later.”

Peter cleared his throat. “What if we contact Mr Stark? He could help with the gauntlets?”

“Kid, no.” Daisy shook her head. “Meeting your bio parents is overrated. My bio mom tried to suck the life out of me so I wouldn’t stop her from eradicating the human species.” 

There was a defining silence. 

May spoke in a low exhale. “What the fuck?”

“Mr Stark’s a superhero?” Peter asked slowly. 

Daisy shifted awkwardly. “Stark is… sure I only found two other kids of his. But he might have more who just haven’t had their DNA recorded. He’s a good hero but his life is… I’m not going to ask that man for help. And if you make contact with him you will never be safe. The press will hunt you down, his enemies will hunt you down and hurt you. It's not a good idea Peter.” 

“I…” Peter settled sullenly only to suddenly perk up again. “Our sister’s a mechanical engineer. If we can’t ask Mr Stark for help we can ask her. She’ll be loads better at it than I am.” His eyes turned to May. “And Daisy’s arm bones won’t fracture if we do that.” 

Daisy looked rather betrayed but also amused. 

“Not on a school night, but Friday if you want to go meet your other sister you can.” May gave Daisy a pointed look. “No powers till then. Fractured bones.”


	2. Enter Darcy, Tired Co-ed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right! So updating schedule is going to be Sun/Wed. And thank you for all the comments! 
> 
> Quick note some shit I'm changing from the MCU/Comics cause fuck it. May is Peter's bio aunt. Mainly because the emotional stuff I can do with that is more fun. And also May deserves to brought in more centrally. Then Pietro Maximoff is alive, doing a miserable amount of physical therapy on the Barton farm. But he lives. Honestly his death was dumb and I love him in the comics so I'm keeping him. I'm stretching out the timeline for the Accords cause the timeframe from the movie is ridiculous and not feasible! Jesus christ. And I'm super stretching out the time from Ghost Rider to Framework in Agents of SHIELD. Just...the timeline was already whack so fuck it. Zemo from Civil War is just...I'm dropping him. He was dumb and his plot made no sense and he didn't need to exist for the plot to work. Probably some other minor stuff I'm forgetting. But figured a heads up was in order.

Darcy Lewis had forgotten what sleep was. She also found she understood Jane on a level she hadn’t wanted to know her on. No wonder scientists were feral creatures that required babysitting. University forced them into bad habits. Just thinking of it Darcy grabbed a poptart and started eating. She would not turn into Jane, she would not. 

She was half convinced she was hallucinating when she heard the knock on her door. Darcy rubbed at her eyes. Dear Thor what time was it? The clock said seven thirty pm. Huh, so early, she wouldn’t have guessed that.

The knock on the door came again. 

Was it worth it? Darcy groaned and began to slog from her bed to the door. She only tripped over one pile of murdered toasters. Finding cheap parts was difficult. Grabbing the door she yanked it open. “Yes?” 

“You’re Darcy!” A very excited middle schooler yelped in awe...high schooler? 

The girl who looked around Darcy’s age...maybe highschool, set a hand on the kid’s shoulder. “Hi.” She raised her other hand holding a massive take out bag from the Chinese place down the street. “Can we come in?” 

“I’ll have you know I tased Thor. Also I’m broke. So like go rob from someone else, if you want broken toasters I’ve got six of them.” Darcy was way too tired and not stupid enough to let strangers into her apartment. 

The girl rolled her eyes. “Please, this chinese is worth more than your apartment Lewis.” 

“And you know my name...is this a stalking thing? Cause I know I got humongous girls here but I’m an equal opportunity taser.” Darcy’s nose twitched at the smell wafting from the bag, that was kung pao chicken in there. Points to not being crazy serial killers. 

Both of the strangers’s eyes automatically flicked to her breasts. Then the oddest thing happened, both of their faces scrunched up in horror and disgust. The tween...teen?’s face turned bright red, eyes snapping to the ceiling. “Not thieves!”

The girl huffed out a laugh. “I’m afraid incest isn’t my thing.” She raised a brow pointedly. “Name’s Daisy Johnson and this is Peter Parker and we’re your siblings.” 

Darcy went to open her mouth and then paused. Her mom had always rocked the single mom thing till she’d met Brad a few years ago. And thanks to her Grams’s photos Darcy knew her mom had partied. “You’re asian.” She looked at Daisy, and then to Peter. “Huh, so what was our dad a giant manwhore?” 

“More than you can possibly imagine.” Daisy looked vaguely disgusted. “Walking std does not describe it. And he rather famously uses condoms, which makes us the 1 in 99 hook ups.” 

Darcy stepped back and waved them in. “Don’t mind the mess.” She shuffled over to the kitchen part of the studio. Great Thor she didn’t like this shit hole. “Make yourselves at home I guess?”

“I checked your order history, think I got your favorite,” Daisy remarked while shutting the door behind her. 

The kid, Peter, sounded awestruck. “Is that an NI ELVIS for data acquisition and control with 16 analog outputs and four inputs!?” 

“You know what an NI ELVIS is?” Darcy looked at him in interest, and yes his eyes were bright with excitement. 

Peter nodded so fast it looked like his head might fall out. “I prefer chemical sciences and physics but if you’ve got an Elvis you’ve got to be good at this stuff.” 

“I am? I mean never figured I’d be good at it. But you know teachers, they saw the girls and the bouncy hair and assumed I’d be bad at it and honestly I was just bored in their classes.” Darcy shrugged. 

Daisy snorted as she started pulling out chinese containers and setting them on the rickety table. “Apparently science and sarcasm is what we all got from our dad. Or well hacking in my case.” 

“You hack? Have a handle I might recognize? Cause this whole sibling thing, freaking me out but like might not be that bad.” Darcy grabbed forks from her drawer, bumping it shut with her hip. 

Daisy grinned, her eyes lighting up for the first time since she’d arrived. “Gave myself the name Skye when I was fifteen. Founding member of the Rising Tide, ‘skyenet’.” 

“Holy hot tamales! You’re skyenet!? The skyenet!?” Darcy gapped at her..half sister? “How old were you when you started? Twelve?!” 

“Sixteen actually.” Daisy’s lips twitched. “Smarts are kinda our thing.” 

Peter grinned. “I made super webbing fluid at thirteen.” He looked at Daisy with big brown eyes full of hero worship. But a smug little grin on his face. 

Daisy looked at him with a raised brow. “I didn’t go to fancy school, or even the same school for more than a year. I had to learn hacking from my boyfriend. I mean he turned out to be a douchebag, but you know he was useful first. And not my worst boyfriend.” 

“Wait webfluid?” Dary pinched the bridge of her nose. “So you two help out the Spiderman? Of course you do. Thor, next you’ll say one of you is SHIELD.”

“Former, technically.” Daisy shrugged. “And yeah the kid helps the web swinger.” 

Peter pouted. “Oh come on, you have to trust family. And you said we’re not talking to our dad, but yes to sister.” He turned to Darcy. “I don’t help Spiderman, I am Spiderman. And she’s Quake.” 

“Really?” Daisy lightly slapped him upside the head as she turned to face him. “Have you never heard of a secret identity? That’s lesson number one of powers is don’t talk about powers.” 

Darcy grabbed her coffee pot. “Powers, of course you have powers. But Fight Club reference, I can live with that.” She looked at her two siblings and the horrifying thing was that she believed them. “So should I be expecting powers?” 

Peter winced. “No? Like I got bit by a radioactive spider? So don’t really have one of those.” 

“I’m an inhuman, on my mom’s side.” Daisy shrugged. “Kung Pao Chicken?” 

“Thor yes.” Darcy grabbed the box while handing the forks over to Daisy. “So I’m guessing you used my DNA on file with SHIELD to find me?” 

Daisy grinned while dropping into the half broken armchair. “It was surprisingly easy after I built the new SHIELD database.” 

“Ok it’s bugging me. How old are you kid?” Darcy looked at Peter who’d just nabbed an eggroll. 

He paused, squaring his shoulders. “Fourteen.” 

“Could have sworn you were younger.” Darcy took a bite of her chicken, Thor that was good. 

Daisy snickered. “It’s the baby face.” 

“HEY!” Peter yelped. 

////

Daisy munched on her third eggroll. She softened at the sight of her siblings. Giving Peter this, a sister who wouldn’t abandon him again. She could make sure they were safe, then leave before death reached them. 

“So these gauntlets are super tacky. What if we change them to a plastic polymer with a rubber base?” Peter suggested from where he was bent over the table with Darcy. 

Darcy made a groaning sound. “It’ll crack, that’s why the original engineer used this metal alloy.” She tapped the damaged remains of Daisy’s old gauntlets. “What if we made a metallic rubber weave?” 

“It wouldn’t hold the burden of anything past a rickter 2.4 vibration.” Peter denied. 

Daisy could feel her eyes glazing over, god it was almost as bad as Fitz and Simmons when they got started on a project. She hopped up and slipped out of the tiny crappy apartment. It was easy enough to slip up to the roof. She sat on the edge of the building, her legs hanging off. Pulling out her phone she stared at it. 

-”Who is this?”- Jemma’s voice came through, it was all frustration and british impatience. 

Daisy smiled. “Hey.” 

-”DAISY!”- Jemma coughed before lowering her voice. -”Where are you? Are you ok? Do you need anything?”-

Her muscles relaxed for the first time in weeks. “I’m good, turns out the little bro and big sis got all the brains in the family.” 

-”Oh don’t give yourself so little credit. You’re very smart in your own way.”- Jemma happily babbled. -”I don’t know if I can get you anything, the new Director is very strict.”-

Daisy’s smile grew as she sat on the roof, the only lights the passing artifice of the city. “It’s ok, Peter’s very determined to fix my gauntlets, his aunt was upset about the whole fractured bone thing.”

-”That is completely barbaric. You can’t just keep breaking yourself!”- Jemma whisper shrieked. 

Daisy laughed at that. “I’m doing better.” 

-”If you just came back I could take care of you. It’d be like old times.”- Jemma wheedled. 

She looked at the people going about their business down below. “I can’t come back. Maybe death does follow me, maybe it doesn’t. But I can’t keep losing people.” 

-”Daisy, please you’re throwing away your career, friends who love you. Lincoln wouldn’t want you to be alone.”- Jemma begged. 

Daisy clucked her tongue. “I can’t go back to SHIELD.” 

-”Well maybe you can stay with your family. Find a purpose there? You know you’ll always be my best friend. But if you need a new family then well maybe these people can be that family?”- 

She sighed. “I’m not staying long. Just keep them safe. They’re better off without me.” 

-”We weren’t better off without you.”- There was clicking on her end. -”You built us up, saved millions of lives. Will you consider it, please?”-

“Maybe once I have them secure I can….I don’t know...get a new van.” Daisy ran a hand through her hair. “Thank you for being, well you.”

-”You’re certainly welcome, though I’m unsure what that means.”- Jemma made a particular sound. -”Did I tell you Fitz took me to-”-

Daisy closed her eyes while letting herself listen to Jemma ramble on about Fitz. It was good to hear about something that felt normal. She didn’t miss SHIELD, but she missed the people though. Letting her head fall back she sighed, she’d have to buy Jemma and Fitz an apartment. Honestly they’d never agree on a place in their budget. This was...peaceful. 

////

Darcy passed a frozen bag of peas to Daisy. “So you’re really my half sister then. Gotta say, life just keeps getting more and more whack.” 

“Good way of putting it.” Daisy passed a beer to Darcy. “You’ve been pretty chill about the half siblings, superhero and vigilante things.” 

Darcy snorted. “Please, I tased the god of thunder, had my ipod stolen by a secret agent, had my boss lady get possessed with a magical space rock, there were some portals, then changed my major from political science to mechanical engineering. Which was somehow harder than the alien mumbo jumbo.” 

“I get that.” Daisy took a long sip of her beer. “It’s one weird world.” 

Darcy raised her beer and clinked their bottles together. She eyed her sister, they looked quite different, likely the most different of the three of them. But she recognized something there, that same thing that had told her to let them into her apartment. “You’re planning on leaving Peter sometime soon aren’t you?” 

“Death follows wherever I go.” Daisy shifted the frozen peas on her horrifically bruised and swollen forearm. 

She paused, eyebrows raising. “I mean that’s bullshit. But I’ll look out for the kid once you decide to disappear. He’s sweet.” Darcy glanced over to where Peter was passed out on the couch and snoring, the pink penguin blanket tucked carefully over him. “If you don’t keep in touch he’ll be heartbroken.” 

“He’ll be something special.” Daisy hissed as the peas shifted slightly in the bag. “Make sure you take a look at his goggles, they’re something alright.” 

Darcy nodded. “So, the invite to family dinner tomorrow?” 

“Aunt May will hunt you down if you don’t show. That woman is almost as effective at getting her way as the other May I know.” 

There was a slightly awkward silence. Darcy fiddled with the label on her beer bottle. Honestly, the kid helped with breaking the ice. “So if you were SHIELD, that mean you ever met Coulson? Cause for a suit he was pretty awesome.” 

“He ever show you Lola?” Daisy grinned. 

She paused. “Agentman had a girlfriend?” 

“His car.” Daisy snorting before bursting into giggles. “Though he did have a thing with the cellist and then I think he and May are starting to have a thing.” 

Darcy paused. “Starting?”

“You didn’t get the ‘he’s alive’ memo when SHIELD fell?” Daisy reached out with her less damaged arm and patted her on the shoulder. “Yeah details suck, moral of the story is if it dies don’t use alien blood to resurrect them.” She took a long drink from her bottle. “Unless they’re already part alien.” 

Darcy banged her head against the table. “How is it that every time you open your mouth there’s just...so much there.” 

“Hazard of SHIELD.” Daisy frowned. “Or hazard of me.” 

Darcy stared at her sister. “You are a serious downer. You know that right?” 

////

Peter yawned as he stumbled into the kitchen. He scratched at his tummy as he poured coffee into his nerd mug. Eyes half closed he dumped sugar and milk into his mug. Carting the milk and his coffee to the table he set them down before fumbling for a bowl and cereal. 

“It’s hard to believe he has super reflexes.” May’s voice chimed in. 

Daisy replied, laughter in her voice. “I don’t know, it’s impressive he hasn’t run into anything.” 

“We haven’t rearranged furniture in years.” May replied in good humor. 

He grumbled. “The worst.” Peter slumped into his chair and proceeded to drown his cereal in milk.

There was giggling from both of them, the traitors. May cleared her throat. “So what are your plans for today Daisy?” 

“I was going to get the supplies for go bags. Well the basics. It’s important that if anyone finds out Peter’s identity that you two can get out till I can get to you.” There was a clink as Daisy set down her own mug of coffee. “And I’m going to need some paintball equipment.” 

May sighed. “Do I want to know why you need paintball equipment?” 

“I’m not letting Peter get shot. Bulletproof suit, no pajamas. And he’s going to learn how to avoid gunfire.” Daisy reached out punching his shoulder. 

“Ow.” Peter rubbed at his arm. He then stilled, eyes opening fully for the first time all morning. “Wait, you’re going to teach me how to dodge bullets?!” 

Daisy looked at him like he was an idiot. “You want to be a superhero, that means dodging training.” She grinned. “And I get shooting practice.” 

“If it keeps him from getting hurt you can shoot him with as many paintballs as possible.” May sighed looking at him. “I know you’re a hero. But do you have to go out there right now?” She reached out touching his hand.

Peter swallowed. “Uncle Ben said with great power comes great responsibility. And I… how do I not do anything when I can?” 

“Power comes with a bunch of crap you’re not ready for, so we’ll get you used to it so this world doesn’t consume you and spit you out.” Daisy was kind, but also sad as she looked at him. It was…

He ducked away from his sister’s look. “Yeah, I’ll do whatever I can to do better.” 

“Save me for I have been blessed by the best of people in my life.” May took Daisy’s hand and squeezed it gently. “Both of you.” 

////

Darcy rolled her eyes as she spotted her new sibling in the shitty diner she waited tables for. She stepped over and set a glass of water down. “Anyone know you’re here kid?” 

“Daisy said something about homework, but she’ll be here in a bit.” He grinned, practically bouncing in his seat. “So I had a thought. Daisy’s got her old gauntlets from like two evolutions ago, and they’re kinda busted cause she stripped the tracking system out. But we could repair it right?” 

She considered it. “That would be doable. Cause shock absorbing gauntlets are beyond what we have the equipment to make. But repair? I can do that.” 

“Sweet! Cause I already nicked them.” Peter cheerfully gulped from his water glass. 

Darcy snorted. “I’m not serving you anything with caffeine.” 

“That’s...fine. Can I at least have some fries?” He gave her the biggest big brown puppy eyes.

She reached out ruffling his hair and stalked back to the kitchen. Darcy shot a look at the other waitress. “Caroline cover for me? I’m gonna hang with the kid since it’s slow.” 

“He’s illegally too young for you.” Caroline dropped her hands onto her hips. 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Please, I like men, thank you very much. And that’s my half brother and our half sister is apparently crashing later. Turns out our dad was a manwhore.” 

“Huh, three of you...really?” Caroline whistled. “Well hot damn.” 

Darcy filled out an order form for Peter and Daisy, she’d seen them eat. One order of fries her ass. “Knew my dad was a deadbeat, didn’t know he was a slut. What can you do though?” 

“At least he’s not in jail. Is he in jail? It could be something we have in common besides this shitty job.” Caroline perked up slightly. 

Darcy sniggared. “If only, the female population would be safer from STDs.” 

“Eh, three kids on different women isn’t too bad.” Caroline snapped her table rag at her. 

She hopped backwards with a huff. “We’re from condom slips. Enough sex for three condom slips that led to kids.” 

“Seriously? Damn. Never mind. He’s a manwhore among manwhores. Is that something to be disgusted by or to congratulate you for?” Her friend's face scrunched in confusion. 

Darcy actually considered that. Not that she’d processed Tony fucking Stark was her bio dad yet. But… “Well at least he gave me great bone structure and amazing hair.” 

“Fair enough.” Caroline sighed as she spotted a new customer coming in. She flipped her hair and plastered on a fake smile. 

Darcy filled a plastic cup with ice and sprite. She slid it in front of Peter and dropped onto the cracked vinyl seat. “So why the superhero gig? Shouldn’t you be in school?” 

“Half day today.” Peter slurped from his soda. “Thanks for this.” 

She raised an eyebrow. “You’re paying for it.” 

Darcy stared at the notebook in front of Daisy. “You’re going to make us learn code?” 

“Evac options and methods of making sure we can warn each other if something happens. We’re in a city that’s been invaded by aliens, and gets hit by egocentric idiots at least three times a year and we’re all targets.” 

Peter picked up the pack of colored pencils. “We could do color codes? It's easier to drop into conversation that way.” 

“Fuck it, I’d like not to get squished by an alien. So does this mean safe houses?” Darcy clouched back in the booth. 

Daisy seemed to relax. “Safe houses are...I’m working on setting one up for you. But typically you just need to disappear for a few days. Which just means find the cheapest, rattiest motel you can and watch crap tv and get food from the local gas station.” 

“Do we at least get a go bag with cleaning supplies and sheets in it then?” Darcy’s nose wrinkled. Shitty motels were so gross. 

“It’s the basics.” Daisy huffed out a laugh for the first time since they’d met. “Gross, but necessary.” 

Peter dunked a fry into the ketchup. “I get to help with villains right?” 

“Not till you graduate highschool.” Daisy stole one of Peter’s fries. “Evacuation of civilians at most.” 

Darcy nodded. “I’m with her. So my job in all these plans is basically, run and hide right?” 

“I’m sure we can come up with a few involving your taser.” Daisy’s eyes had a knowing glint. 

Darcy cleared her throat. “Whether or not I have a technically illegal military grade taser in my purse is none of your business.” 

“But you threatened to tase us?” Peter looked at her in confusion. 

Daisy shared an amused look with Darcy before replying with a quirk of her lips. “The mysterious ways of women.” Daisy’s head tilted. “Which keep it in mind that women are far more likely to stab you with their keys or have a weapon of some kind on their person.” 

“.....why?” Peter looked between them, eyes wide in alarm. 

Darcy folded her hands in front of her. “Alright, listen to me whippersnapper. As a small time hero you’re going to be helping a lot of women with creepy dudes. Now..” 

Darcy snorted into her milkshake. “We are not making a plan for what to do if one of us is turned into a gerbil. There’s no way.” 

“It could happen!” Peter protested.


	3. Villain of the Week: Yappy Dogs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! You guys are amazing! And I got a shocking amount of writing done this week. And it's looking like this thing is probably going to be around twentyish chapters. But honestly I could stumble on a plot point that balloons that so not sure.

Peter whooped as he slung himself over the top of three shipping containers. He ducked and rolled just as he’d been taught, before popping back up onto his feet. “That was AWESOME!”

“You did good, kid.” Daisy clapped him in the shoulder with her good arm. Her right arm was in a bright pink cast with unicorn stickers on it. It was ridiculous and went all the way up to her shoulder. 

He bounced on his toes. “So what’s next?” 

“Since I’m an arm down.” Daisy gave a pointed look at her arm. “For no reason.-”

“It was shattered!” He interjected. 

She sighed. “We’re working on the basics. And you’re not going out there without a bulletproof suit.” 

Peter hopped over to her laptop. “Did you find fabric that was bulletproof?” 

“I sometimes forget we live in America.” Daisy reached over switching tabs on her browser. “There is a legit company that just makes bullet proof shi---stuff. The backpacks were particularly disturbing.” 

“Oh that’s messed up.” He winced at the picture of a little girl holding a bullet proof bag. 

Daisy clicked off. “Well the fabric should be here tomorrow, and I got you a backpack from them too. Also just...I bought a lot of stuff from them. I didn’t expect my life to be filled with as many bullets as it is, but here we are.” 

“You know…” He trailed off wiggling his eyebrows. 

She paused. “We’re not suggesting powered quidditch to the Avengers.” 

“We so are, but no.” He grinned. “If you’re gonna be helping me out you’re gonna need a mask.” 

Daisy paused. “I’m not a hero, vigilante maybe.” 

“According to the law heroes are vigilantes, or well most of us.” He nudged her. “But my friends have seen you, and you’re like super cool so they def will recognize you.” 

Daisy shoved him off. “Go stretch, then run the course again. Let’s see if you can shave down some time.” 

“Do you have to shoot paintballs at me?” He winced slightly while poking at one of the many bright orange spots littering his old suit. 

She grinned, showing just a bit too many teeth. “It amuses me.” 

“You’ll think about the mask?” He skipped backwards. 

Daisy rolled her eyes while picking up the paintball gun. “I’m covering your antics with a sniper rifle once you’re trained up and in a safer suit.” 

“It’s a great idea!” Peter laughed as he kept walking backwards. “YOU LOVE IT!” 

“OW!” 

“What did you do to yourself?” Ned hissed over his sandwich. “Did someone mug you?” 

Peter leaned forward. “My sister’s teaching me how to throw a punch.” He poked at his fading black eye. “She has an arm in a cast and she still nailed me this morning.” He pouted, it was no fair.

“That’s so rad.” Ned gaped, his eyes wide. “I still can’t believe your dad never told you he had a kid when he was a teenager.” 

Peter froze for a moment. “Yes, cause that’s what he did. So weird my dad never said anything.” He cleared his throat. “Speaking of I have two sisters? And Darcy is like two years older than Daisy.” 

“Dude! Your dad could….” Ned paused at the expression on Peter’s face. “I mean that’s nice… is your newer new sister super cool too?”

Peter beamed, he and Darcy had made real progress. “She’s super smart. But like Daisy is super badass right? Darcy’s cool, but just not badass. Though she did tase Thor! So I think I just have the most badass sisters ever.” 

“Really!?” Ned took a large bite out of his sandwich. “What are the chances of that? I mean she has to be awesome if she tased Thor.” 

He enthusiastically nodded. “Darcy is letting me help her with her new grad project. She wants to create these shock absorbers. It’s going to change so much! Like the applications are sweet. And she told me I can meet her boss when the semester ends and she goes back to her internship!” 

“Who’s her boss?” Ned took a sip from his milk carton. 

Peter side eyed that no one was paying attention. “Doctor Jane Foster! The astrophysicist!” 

“No way!” Ned’s eyes were round like saucers. “You gotta introduce me to your sisters!” 

He nodded excitedly. “Of course, you’re my best friend.” 

“This year is dope. How do you get all the awesome family members? Like even your Aunt May is really nice.” Ned pulled out a magazine. “Before I forget, did you see this? Ironman stopped some doombots last night.” 

Peter stared at the pictures and it kinda hit him that that was his dad. Like the coolest superhero he’d ever read about. The dude he had a poster of in his room. That was his dad, Tony Stark genius and hero was his dad. And holy shit...he got why Daisy didn’t want to meet the man. Like that was terrifying to think about. 

Peter swung in Darcy’s open window. “Sup Sis!” 

“Motherfucking shitballs!” Darcy spun around, screwdriver brandished in her hand. “You can’t do that! Heart attacks are real and they kill.” She pushed her safety goggles up, one hand pressed against her chest. “Call first, for realsies.” 

He pouted while grabbing a glass of water from the tiny kitchenette. “Wanted to hit you up before Daisy leaves the tailor she’s bribing to make the suit.” 

“Huh, never thought I’d be the normal one in the family.” She spun on her spinny stool to face him. “What up baby bro?” 

Peter hopped up on the counter after chugging his cup of water. “Sooooo…. Daisy is like planning on disappearing in her van. Which is super cool, but not good? Like she should be safe and here.” 

“An intervention isn’t gonna work kiddo.” Darcy tossed him a granola bar. “Like she’s a badass. Do not repeat that to your aunt. But Daisy’ll have jack booted thug agent types crawling all over her if she stays too long.” 

Peter rolled his eyes. “Duh, but like what if we make it so the thug agents can’t get to her?” 

“Pranking the government. Excellent idea young padawan. You have a plan already?” Darcy’s brows rose, it probably would have been more impressive if she didn’t look like she just needed a nap. 

He bounced slightly. “We just have to make people like her too much for it to be worth the media attention!” 

“PR...your plan is PR?” Darcy’s head tilted to the side, a thoughtful expression. “We could do it, maybe… You’ve got the friendly neighborhood hero thing going. And really it just has to be too much of a media event for SHIELD to steer clear.” 

Peter nodded excited that she understood. “See we just have to have her known enough and like publicized enough mean agent people can’t like grab her.” 

“So PR, we could do that. But kid, she doesn’t want to stay.” Darcy picked up a half empty redbull can and knocked it back. She opened her mouth and then paused, her head tilting to the side. “But you know… our sis is really protective.” 

Peter considered that. “So if I stumble into big enough trouble she’ll have to stay and help me?” 

Darcy ran a hand through her hair. “That’s super stupid, dumb dumb.” 

He pouted. “But it would work.” 

“And she and your Aunt May would lock you in your room with enough duct tape to keep even you from escaping. It’d be all distance learning and eating out of a straw till they were sure you weren’t going to get yourself killed.” Darcy stuck a pencil behind one ear. “That’s straight up Loony Toon logic bud.” 

Peter slumped onto the shitty couch. “So you have any idea how to get her to stay?” 

“We gotta let her do her thing. Like let the bird out of the cage. ‘Sides, she likes us. Figure it’ll be a bit like a boomerang.” Darcy picked up a screwdriver. 

He picked up his goggles so his fingers had something to fiddle with. “I don’t want her to go. She’ll get herself hurt.” 

“Probably. But you both are dumbass hero types.” Darcy tightened something inside the guts of her project. “It’s got to be a family thing. Cause I’m going back to my internship that’s two for two on the alien invasions as soon as I finish up the semester. And your tiny butt is going to stop muggers and traffic accidents even if we conspire to steal your pajamas from ya. So we gotta let Daisy go do her dumbass thing too.” 

Peter sighed, shoulders slumping. “I still don’t like it.” 

“Tough luck.” Darcy’s tongue stuck out slightly as she twisted, clearly reaching a mostly covered screw head. “So, how’s the goggles going?” 

He pulled up the glasses repair kid and opened up the side. “Mostly good, think I can open them up to a bit more light.” 

“Have you considered using a film so they only let in specific wavelengths of light instead of just dimming all light?” Darcy suggested, looking up from her advanced shock absorber. 

Peter lit up. “Oh my god that’s brilliant!” 

“I know.” Darcy smirked. 

He grabbed his crate of spider projects. “I can make different sets for different times of day! Night vision here I come!” 

“Just don’t forget it’s family movie night. We’re watching Hairspray, my pick and I’ll put glitter in your web shooters if you try to skip, it’s non optional.” She waved the screwdriver in his face in mock threat. 

Peter held up his hands with a laugh. “Got it, got it.” He rocked forward. “But we work on the gauntlets after Daisy passes out tonight right?” 

“Totes, see if you can deconstruct them before tonight though. If they’re already taken apart it’ll go faster once we start working on them.” Darcy picked up some rolled up notebook pages and passed them over. “And keep track of the small bits. The less we have to replicate the better.” 

He nodded. “They’re super nice. SHIELD had to have really liked her.” 

“A budget. What I’d do for secret agent budget.” Darcy pouted. 

“Eh, we can do better. We’ll care more.” Peter stuffed the instructions into his backpack. 

Darcy’s face was amused. “Yeah, we’ll make them better.” 

Peter yanked some gummy worms out of his bag. “Do you think red light or blue light would be easier for the goggles?” He picked his goggles back up

“Why not make both? You’d have back ups if one gets damaged.” Darcy pulled her hair back with a glittery scrunchy. “You’re sharing those worms.” 

He cocked his head to one side. “Study sessions have to have snacks.” 

“Very good young padawan.” Darcy solemnly nodded. 

Peter filled with sudden excitement. “After you graduate we should make lightsabers!!” 

“Fuck it, let’s do it.” Darcy high fived him. 

////

Darcy’s eyes closed in delight at the first taste of hot food she hadn’t had to make herself. “Aunt May is this risotto?” 

“It is!” May Parker ruffled Peter’s hair where he was inhaling his food too fast to taste. And honestly Daisy was eating at about the same rate. “Not that anyone else here is tasting it.” 

Daisy’s cheeks pinked slightly. “Thank you for dinner Aunt May.” 

“Honestly, you two have black holes for stomachs.” May patted Daisy’s cheek before settling into the armchair. 

Darcy hummed as she sipped at the glass of wine she’d secured for herself. “You’ll have to send me the recipe Aunt May. I haven’t made anything that didn’t involve a microwave in days.” 

“You’re always welcome to come for dinner here.” May smiled fondly at the three of them squashed on the couch. “You’re family. Besides, Daisy already lives here.” 

“Temporarily.” Daisy chimed in. 

Peter stuck his tongue out at Daisy. “That’s so dumb. You should just stay.” 

“I’ve got an international gang to track down.” Daisy elbowed Peter. “Once they surface again I’ll need to chase after.” 

May lowered her wine glass. “You’ll always have a room with us.” 

Darcy heard the soft hitch in her sister’s throat. She spoke up before Daisy could combust. “So one of my classmates from undergrad emailed me about something called the Accords. Sounds like bad news.” 

“I’ve read them.” Daisy shot her a look of gratitude. “They’re bad news.” 

May took a gulp of her wine before speaking. “Do you think they’ll pass?” 

“Maybe?” Darcy chewed on her lower lip. “Like people are scared.” 

Daisy chewed her bite of risotto with prejudice. “With Inhumans going through terrigenesis everywhere it’s...aliens and powered people are affecting everyone. There’s a lot of people who support exterminating those who aren’t quite human.” 

“Surely it won’t come to that?” May looked pale, her eyes focusing on Peter, squashed in the middle of the couch. 

Peter’s face was crinkled as he looked up. “Why can’t we stop it from happening? I mean the Accords are bad right? They’d register everyone with powers and registering citizens isn’t good right?” 

“No, it’s not good.” Daisy wrapped an arm around Peter’s shoulders, her elbow bumping into Darcy slightly. “But there’s nothing we can do. Not without making things worse.” 

Peter’s frown deepened. “But our dad could stop it couldn’t he? I mean he’s Tony Stark. Everyone loves Ironman.” 

“Rumor has it he’s in favor of them actually,” Darcy said gently. She shared a concerned look with Daisy. “The Accords won’t hold up legally for more than a few years. It’s probably best you two keep your heads down till they are repealed by Congress.” 

Peter was properly mulish. As he looked around the three of them. “Why don’t we just talk to him? I mean we’re his kids! He’d have to listen right? Like he’s Mr Stark.” 

“You’d have better luck convincing his lawyers.” Darcy sighed. “Look, hero types aren’t half bad. I’m buds with Thor. But they have a tendency to like just do their own thing. And forget the other folks. I mean Thor ditched his ‘Lady Jane’ for over a year cause it wasn’t part of the big save the day bit. So dumb, Janey’s the best. And the smartest gal I know.” 

Aunt May cleared her throat. “So why don’t you make sure Stark’s lawyers convince him it’s a bad idea? He’s got to listen to his lawyers.” 

“He listens to Potts, and Potts listens to lawyers.” Darcy allowed. 

Daisy blinked. “I suppose I could hack them and piss them off enough they’d have to do something?” 

“I can find online nerds who broke down Accords on reddit or something and link you to it?” Peter grinned. “I’ve already finished the whole semester’s homework in computer science.” 

Darcy took a long drink of wine. “If we’re doing this we’re doing it right. No linking it back to us. I doubt Stark likes people hacking SI.” 

“Is planning vigilante crime before the previews a movie night a thing now?” May asked a sort of helpless resignation to her. 

Darcy snorted. “Crime, risotto and Hairspray? What the heck, sounds pretty cool to me.” 

////

Daisy stared at her baby bro. “I’ll be shadowing you from the roofs. With a dendrotoxin sniper rifle. So two hours of low risk hero-ing.” 

“But I can wear the new suit?” He bounced on his toes. 

She held out the bullet proof red and blue suit, complete with his newest version of his sense deprivation goggles. “Duh, the new suit is dope. Just remember petty crime only.” 

“I’m gonna rock this!” Peter hopped and then disappeared into his room to change into his suit. 

Daisy huffed fondly. With a little smile she made her way into the kitchen. “Aunt May.” 

“He’s going to be safe?” She asked.

“I promise to look after him. And his abilities are...he’s got a built in alarm system for when things are going to hurt him. And I’ve got his back. Not to mention I’m setting up a computer surveillance program so you and Darcy can keep an eye on him once I’m gone.” 

May laid a hand on her forearm. “You’re leaving that soon then?” 

“Heard some chatter about a gang no one else is looking into because they’re still pretty small time. But if I’m right they aren’t small time at all.” Daisy rubbed at the back of her neck. “Thank you for everything. Peter is luckier than he knows to have you.” 

She hugged her. “We’ll miss you.” 

Daisy froze at the contact. She cleared her throat...she didn’t know how to escape without hurting the woman’s feelings. Stiffly she patted at May’s back. It was nice, she just didn’t… she didn’t know May Parker well enough for this. But she liked the woman. Slowly she softened.

“Will you tell Peter tonight?” May pulled back finally, though she kept a hold on Daisy’s upper arms. 

She shook her head. “Naw, let him have a week to enjoy the hero shtick.” 

Daisy bit her lip to keep from laughing out right as she watched Peter’s exciting day of hero-ing turn into walking old ladies home while carrying their groceries. It was cute. She tapped her ear piece. “Darcy, what do you think about making cookies?” 

“Only if you help me test my new shock absorber. I think I had a breakthrough.” Darcy’s voice changed. “Wait, aren’t you two out on patrol?” 

Peter came through. “Can you at least pretend I’m gonna do something cool? Pleaseee?” 

“How’s the free churro?” Daisy teased lightly. 

Daisy sipped at her slurpy, her feet hanging off the edge of the building. “Today exciting enough for you?” 

“Ok that yappy dog was terrifying!” Peter pouted as sipped from his own slurpy. 

She elbowed him while grinning. “It’s tiny poodle teeth were going to rip right through your kevlar protected ankles.” 

“Shut up.” He mumbled into his straw. 

Daisy hummed. “So while you were hiding in a tree from a teacup poodle I was infecting SI’s servers to make the accords the default screen in the legal department. Also PR, shouldn’t hurt.” 

“If this doesn’t work shouldn’t we try and at least talk to Mr Stark?” Peter sucked on his slurpy with far too much enthusiasm before cringing. “Cold headache, shooting knife pains.” 

She considered knocking him off the rooftop, he’d survive. “We are not getting involved in the crazy that is the Avengers. That’s how we end up in powered people gulags. Especially with the public mood we stay under the radar.” 

“Like blowing up Watchdog warehouses is under the radar.” Peter snorted. 

Daisy knocked him off the roof.


	4. Daisy, Porcupine of Angst

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I miss Agents of SHIELD so much. Just fuck Disney for canceling all their shows on any platform that isn't Disney+. I mean I liked Daredevil, and I adored AoS. Obviously lots of other Marvel shows but those were my favorites. I mean I couldn't watch Jessica Jones or Luke Cage without being horrifically depressed after a single episode so I just kinda....appreciated them from afar. But they seemed incredibly excellent. But it's the day the roomy and I would usually Watch AoS episodes and we're both like 'so uh....should we start a new show?'

Daisy stilled in the doorway. She took in the ease May and Peter moved around each other with as they got ready for the day. They were family. She was surprised by the ache she felt watching them. Biting at her lip she wavered. It would be so dangerous to stay. Dangerous for this small family she was bound to by blood and gratitude. 

She continued forward before either of the Parker’s noticed her lingering. “Morning.” 

“Daisy, have you seen my purple sweatshirt?” Peter asked while stuffing his notebook into his bag. 

Daisy grabbed her leather jacket and chucked it at him. “You left it at the warehouse yesterday.” 

“I can wear your jacket?” He looked at her, wide eyed. 

Aunt May dropped Peter’s lunch into his arms. “You’re going to be late!” 

“Right going, going.” He stuffed the lunch in his bag and took off, jacket safely hugged under one arm. 

Daisy laughed while claiming a mug with Grumpy Cat on it. It was enough to know that the Parkers and Darcy could exist like this. “Need a ride to work Aunt May?” 

“Please.” Aunt May grabbed her purse and paused. “If that’s still alright? I hate to ask it, but with the honda in the shop it’s just-” 

“Hard.” Daisy finished for her. “It’s fine, I need to pick up some stuff for the van anyways. It’s not a problem.” 

Aunt May smiled. “Well thank you. And don’t even think about trying to pay for the honda’s work. I can more than afford it thanks to the mystery money.” 

“Wonder how that happened.” Daisy made a note to put the equivalent of the repair costs in the Parker account, instead of just paying for the thing. Aunt May’s expression when she realized would be hilarious. The joys of misusing her hacking skills. It was excellent fun. 

Aunt May gave her ‘the’ look while locking the door. “Yes, I wonder how that happened.” 

“Maybe one of the tellers is in love?” Daisy pulled her black knit beanie down over her head. “Half the neighborhood is.” 

Aunt May huffed. “Half the neighborhood is not in love with me.” 

“You get free potstickers when you order take out, and I know you had a number on your starbucks cup yesterday.” Daisy raised her brow. 

Aunt May didn’t blush or brush it off, she just...was. “I’m not interested so I guess I don’t notice it.” 

“I understand that.” Daisy shoved her hands into her pockets as they walked down the block to the van. 

Aunt May stopped them with a hand on Daisy’s upper arm. “Daisy?” 

“I still say you should work it. The free food and drinks, own it.” Daisy cocked her head to the side, her face turning playful. She was not going to talk about Lincoln. 

Aunt May was quiet for a long second. She squeezed Daisy’s arm before walking again. “It is nice to get free stuff.” 

“You know you look good when you don’t pay for your drinks.” Daisy pulled out the keys as they approached her eyesore of a van. 

Aunt May laughed. “I wouldn’t know. Ben and I were dating by senior year of high school.”

“We have got to get you to a club at some point.” Daisy unlocked her clunker. “I mean you legit work to help people while raising Peter. You need a night on the town occasionally.” 

“Oh I don’t know about that.” Aunt May waved off while climbing in. She looked into the back and then back to Daisy. “Do I want to know why there’s that many screens in the back?” 

Daisy perked up, she was proud of the van. “Since you’ve got Darcy, I’m setting up a computer rig. There’s a cabin rental I paid up for the next ten years. If you guys need to get out you grab your bags, get to the van and I have alternate routes pre-loaded. Or well I’m working on that. Also installing police scanners and setting the computer rig to help you track any type of threat.” 

“The guns?” Aunt May asked in resignation. 

She started up the beast and pulled into traffic. “They’re all non-lethal. You might want to join a gun club. Maybe meet some ladies to go clubbing with.” 

“You’re not going to teach me to shoot?” Aunt May asked. 

Daisy grinned. “Well I’d be happy to teach you how to shoot while Peter works on the new forms. Just assumed you’d want to practice, and it’s great stress relief.” 

“Sign me up for a self defence class. All three of us can go together once a week.” Aunt May’s face was serious. 

Daisy looked over meeting Aunt May’s eyes. “Gotcha, maybe make sure Darcy sees sunlight too.” 

“Both of you girls need more sunlight.” Aunt May huffed in amusement. 

She laughed while cutting off a taxi. “You should have seen me when I spent a year in an underground bunker. I only left for missions. The vitamin D supplements Simmons made us all take still haunt me.” 

“She’s the one you call occasionally?” Aunt May asked. 

Daisy softened at the reminder of her best friend. “Yeah, Doctor Jemma Simmons. She’s my best friend. Which is wild because she’s brilliant and all proper and English. But I can’t imagine a world without her.” She sighed. “I’m going to have to just buy her and Fitz an apartment, they’ll never get their dream on with their current budget.” 

“I worry about the money funneling.” Aunt May sighed. “But nice to know it’s not just me.” 

Daisy felt properly smug. “Darcy hasn’t realized her college is paid off.” She pulled up in front of May’s work. Eyeing the people around the homeless shelter, she leaned back in her seat. “I’ll set up those self defense classes. First shooting lesson is this evening.” 

Daisy frowned as she followed the online chatter surrounding the Accords. Stark’s army of lawyers had stalled it. But the public was turning against the Avengers. It would take one mistake for someone to try and force the Accords, or something like it through. And it would be open season on people like Peter if that happened. The wording was freaking her out. “They’re targeting anyone capable of harm. It won’t just be enhanced, it’s going to be doctors, scientists, hell maybe even professional athletes. Anyone who deviates from average.” 

“If there’s too much collateral on a mission the Avengers won’t be able to stop something like the Accords from passing.” Darcy agreed. “It doesn’t help that they don’t take responsibility for their fallout and no one asks them to. They’re too unapproachable.” 

She sent out a request to some of her Rising Tide contacts. “I’m going to drop some messages around but...Stark is too far removed from normal people.” 

“Not mentioning the irony there.” Darcy looked up. “But look, people with powers are separate from ‘normal’ society.” Darcy used finger quotes for ‘normal’. “The world needs powered next door neighbors so ya’ll aren’t so...separate. And the Avengers’ PR team sucks, actually I don’t even know if they have one. There’s no accountability, no nothing. So as long as the threats aren’t alien invasion big why should people trust hero sorts? I mean I know you, and Peter and Thor. But the average citizen doesn’t. Don’t get me wrong the Accords are bullshit, but something has to be done.” 

Daisy’s frown deepened. “We need to be relatable.” She ran a hand through her hair. “And accountable.” 

“You my badass hacker haven’t left any bodies in your cross continent hunt for international crime. But you should probably funnel some cash into the rebuilding projects. Accountability hun.” Darcy pulled a fist sized piece of...something sciency and slapped it in front of Daisy. “Alright I need you to try and crack that with your powers.” 

She raised a brow while picking it up. “So just...channel vibrations into it?” 

“Till it cracks please.” Darcy pushed her safety goggles up. “I’ve got a sensor built in that should tell me how much it takes to break. Just no shattering.” 

Daisy shrugged, and then started to vibrate the thing. “So you’re saying I should steal money and donate it to rebuilding efforts for the property damage I’ve caused?” 

“It’ll do more good than torturing Stark’s PR department. Though keep it up with legal. If he can slow the legislation, maybe something not completely horrific will probably make it through and make the Accords obsolete.” 

Daisy nodded, not being SHIELD meant channeling money from criminals into charity was far easier. And less judgement. “What government oversight do you think we should have?” 

“They shouldn’t be able to cross borders willy nilly.” Darcy slurped from her slushy while pulling up readouts on her junky old laptop. “Some sort of definition of a good samaritan laws. A sort of board who investigate whether actions taken in the public interest are legal or not. It would have to be non-partisan, not connected to the military in any way. Could be a terrible idea but might work. Just a way to separate people who are trying to help from those doing harm really. It’s going to be messy though.” 

She hummed as she forced more and more power into the device in her hand. “No registration.” 

“No, definitely something to deal with the collateral damage though. Maybe an agreement of priorities and values and willingness to comply to some loose standards for you vigilante and hero sorts to sign? More oversight in labs working on highly dangerous projects. But again it would have to be carefully worded so that it doesn’t hamper you idiots too much or turn into a witch hunt.” Darcy leaned forward. “Hold that amount of force right there!” 

Daisy winced, but held it. It made her fractures ache, but it wasn’t breaking anything further. And then there was a metal crack. She cut off the vibrations and held it back out towards her sister. “Did you get what you needed?” 

“I did! We’re off to a great start.” Darcy snagged the device back. “I know I don’t have the equipment or budget to recreate your gauntlets. But I can help earthquake proof buildings and give it a year and better funding and I might make something better than those gauntlets of yours. In the meantime, Peter and I fixed something for you.” 

Daisy looked up. “What? Did one of the suits get damaged when you were stress testing them?” 

“Nope.” Darcy reached under the couch and pulled out a familiar case and dropped it across Daisy’s lap. “We fixed ‘em for you. No roughshod shitty protection anymore.” 

Her hands shook slightly as she opened the case and looked at her gauntlets. They weren’t damaged from the gps being ripped out. In fact they were shiny and looked like new. No more fractures and breaks despite wearing them. It was… they’d fixed them for her. Her voice was thick and wet. “Thank you.” 

“Totes dude. It’s what family does.” Darcy side hugged her, unaware of the deep pain that caused. But good. The type of good pain that seared and throbbed but also healed. 

////

Peter watched with some trepidation as Aunt May shot with a sort of...disturbing dedication. She was a machine following Daisy’s instructions. Darcy meanwhile was looking at her handgun with deep distrust. He cleared his throat. “So uh...do I get to try?” 

“No.” Aunt May loaded a new clip into her handgun. “Not till you’re eighteen.” She eyed the target. “Should I try dropping my shoulders some?” 

Daisy stepped forward checking May’s stance. “No, but keep your aim after you fire. It’s all about the follow through. And see there, good you’re bracing too much, stay loose.” 

“I like tasers.” Darcy whined. “Do I have to learn how to use a gun? I mean I’m kinda against the whole gun thing? Down with the NRA, yay to gun control.” 

Daisy grabbed Darcy’s shoulder and dragged her over and started guiding her into a shooting stance. “I agree with you, but high chance of Hydra or AIM or terrorists or evil military goons coming for you cause we’re Stark’s kids and because of the hero thing. So you’re going to learn to shoot.” 

“The things we do to avoid jack booted thugs.” Darcy raised her gun and fired. 

Peter whistled. Well that was terrifying, the women of his family were scary. Like really awesome, but so scary. “I’m gonna go...jump though some shipping crates.” 

Peter chewed on the eraser of his pencil. “Girls are so weird.” 

“Well they’re girls.” Ned replied with a shrug. “But your sisters seem cool. For girls ya know.” 

He hummed. “It’s just...girls are scary man. I mean how do douches survive mistreating them? That should be the end of them. Aunt May and Darcy joined this gun range. And Daisy signed us all up for self defence classes. I’m the only boy in there. Which is normal apparently?” 

“I don’t know.” Ned looked up at her. “You’re taking self defence classes?” 

He nodded. “Yeah, well I mean Daisy has been teaching me. But she’s got to go for work and didn’t want to leave it all.” 

“Any moves you can show me?” Ned asked excitedly. 

Peter perked up. “Totes! And did you know the water benders in Avatar are based off tai chi? So like I’m learning how to be a water bender. We should dress up as water tribe for halloween.” 

“I thought I was gonna be Thor and you were going to go as Ironman?” Ned’s face scrunched up in confusion. 

He shook his head. “I don’t know I’m feeling a bit like not being him this year. Just with everything and the weapons development ya know?” 

“I guess?” Ned hummed. “I mean Avatar costumes sound cool too.” 

Peter bumped their shoulders together. “Sorry I haven’t had a lot of time for you recently.” 

“You’ve had a lot of family drama. And I mean Daisy took us to that R rated film last weekend so it's not like you’ve been ditching me. Your sisters are pretty awesome.” 

Peter beamed. “They really are! And Darcy says we can help with her project this weekend. She needs someone to like whack it with sledgehammers as a stress test!” 

“I’m so in.” Ned bounced slightly. “That is so much better than just doing homework at home and playing video games!” 

Peter was going to be so grounded. He’d said he was just picking up some eggs, but then he’d heard the sirens and well it was an apartment fire and getting people out was important! It was still hero-ing, but without Daisy as backup and past his new curfew though. He landed against the side of a building and looked at the person who’d pulled his attention from his moping. That was a lady who was stumbling. 

She was really drunk, and no one was walking with her. Oh a few other pedestrians had noticed her but she shouldn’t be out there on her own. He dropped down onto the sidewalk in front of her. “Hi.” 

The woman let out a yelp. “Wha?” 

“I’m just your friendly neighborhood Spiderman, and I just thought you looked like you could use some help.” He tried to be as cheerful as possible. “Do you have anyone you can call? Or like an Uber app?” 

She blinked. “Betty. And my apartment is like four blocks from here.” She waved her arm to the side, but it over balanced her. 

Peter reached out catching her shoulder. “Hey, you’re ok. So uh can I walk you home or something?” 

“Gonna seduce me Casanova?” She giggled high, her whole body shaking with it. 

He blanched. “No, that is not what I’m doing. Nope. Not a creep. Just can I help? Please?” 

Betty slapped at his shoulder. “You’re so squishy!” 

“Oh no...you are very drunk.” He flapped his arms. What was he supposed to do?! 

“Yup!” She unrepentantly hiccuped. Betty smiled at him. “You gonna walk me home handsome?” 

Thank god for masks because he had to be gaping and blushing. His face felt hot. “Yes, yes that’s what I’m going to do. Where do you live? We should go there.” 

Peter was going to combust. Touchy feely drunk was how he was gonna go. Four blocks of giggles, one break for puking, his butt got touched...too much, a lot of nonsense from Betty, but he’d gotten her to her apartment. It was an exhausting and fairly traumatizing forty minutes. He sighed in relief as the door of her building closed behind her. 

“Fun night.” 

He yelped, jumping and spinning around. “Daisy?!” 

“You thought missing curfew by two hours wasn’t gonna be noticed?” She cocked her head to the side with the slightest of smug smirks. 

Peter lunged forward hugging her. “Oh thank god. I didn’t know what to do and she just.. I’m not ready for that.” 

“Handsy drunk girls too much for the epic Spiderman?” Daisy teased lightly, her hands stuffed into her pockets.

He hung his head. “I didn’t know what to do…” 

“Come on Spiderkid, up up and away.” She stepped forward, slinging an arm around his shoulders. 

Peter shot a web up and sent them flying up onto the roof. They both rolled to their feet separately. He turned. “So am I in a ton of trouble?” 

“No, I’m proud of you. You did good today.” Daisy elbowed him fondly. “That fire would have killed people if you hadn't been there. And that woman would be sleeping it off in an alley if she was lucky. It was awkward, kinda gross, and uncomfortable for you but you still finished what you set out to do. I’m proud of you. Although if a girl is that handsy with you, you can just web her hands and cart her home like a sack of potatoes.” 

“Oh.” He blinked, and then pulled his mask and goggles off, staring at her in surprise. “I just thought... “ 

Daisy laughed. “You did good. Nights like this? They’re what being a hero is. A real one. It’s doing what needs to be done even if it’s not glamorous or high stakes, just necessary. This way of life is weirdly boring a lot of the time.” 

He smiled. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” She kicked at the roof slightly. “You owe me an extra mile and hour of thai chi tomorrow though.” 

Peter winced, but it was better than he was expecting. “Ok, but like you can teach me how to shoot on the sly right? Like all of you are doing it except for me.” 

“Nope.” Daisy slung her arm around his shoulders and fluffed up his hair with her other hand. “I will get you your very own tranq gun for your eighteenth birthday.” She snickered at his half hearted protests. “So I was thinking, if I set you up a secure account and untraceable phone, how’d you feel about Spiderman snapchat?” 

He looked at her in disbelief. “But what about my secret identity?” 

“We’d have to make a protocol for it, but you’re doing good with all the spy bug out codes and stuff. But some good PR couldn’t hurt, especially if we don’t want anyone thinking you’re a threat.” Her face was oddly serious. “And let people take selfies with you if they ask. You’re a good kid. People liking you is...it’ll help keep you safe.” 

Peter looked at her in disbelief. “Darcy’s idea?” 

“Darcy’s idea.” Daisy agreed. “Now come on and swing us home bug boy.”


	5. Alcohol is Bad Kids

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! And as some of you have noticed I've added some tags...yay for rare pairs I guess. You know this is the peril of being a multi-shipper without any real ships in a fandom. This shit just happens.

Darcy stared at the computer program her sister had created. “Ok I’m only like 30% sure what this even is...at best. Properly understand maybe 10%. How...sweet Thor.” 

“Engineering is your thing, hacking is mine. I mean you’re making a shock absorber more effective than vibranium. It’s pretty cool.” Daisy grinned. 

She rolled her eyes. “Fine, fine. But if I need a fake id again you’re making it. Also you got some trojans I can unleash on my enemies?” 

“Enemies?” Daisy turned to face her fully, laughter in her voice. 

Daisy nodded solemnly. “You know, dudes who friend me on facebook for the girls.” She looked down at her chest. “Not that the girls aren’t awe worthy, but some creeps deserve a lesson.” 

“I can do that.” Daisy leaned back before falling serious. “You’re pretty neat. I’m sorry it’s not safe to spend more time getting to know you.” 

“Eh, you better skype in for movie night every weak.” Darcy brushed off. “And visit, you know the kid’s going to run into bad guys who are actually bad news at least three times a year.” 

Daisy snorted. “Fair enough.” She tilted her head to one side. “So what do you need me to break for you today?” 

“This.” Darcy reached under the table and picked up her proto-type, version 6. She dropped the hodgepodge machine on the table. “This piece of crap should theoretically absorb up to a richter 2.6 earthquake. If I had better tools and materials I could theoretically make it absorb up to a 5.3 with the current design. It’s kinda fucking cool as shit.” She plugged in the extension cord. 

Daisy raised a brow while standing up. “Uh...that’s a lot of exposed wires?” 

“This baby is unfinished. No point covering wires until I know it works right.” Darcy pulled her hair back into a scrunchy. “Grab my laptop sis.” 

Daisy made a noise of some protest, but she did pick up the ancient laptop up from under the couch. Opening the sucker up, Daisy plugged it in while moving past the login screen despite not knowing the password. 

Darcy picked up her pressure gage and hooked it up to the prototype. “If you feel your bones hurting you stop.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” Daisy waved off. 

She connected the wires between her laptop and prototype. “This is gonna be rad.” Darcy hissed as there was some sparking. Sticking several of her fingers into her mouth she nodded. “Alright, just like… slap your hands down on top and start slow.” 

Daisy looked dubious, but she carefully set her hands on top of the prototype. 

Darcy felt like whooping as she saw the numbers on her screen. “It’s working!” She bit her lip looking at the readings on her screen. “Have I mentioned how dope ass your powers are?” 

“You hadn’t.” Daisy’s voice was tight. 

Her eyes were sharp as she looked up at her sister. Not pain, just concentration. Darcy went back to the readouts. “Ok, increase your output just a little. And your powers are rad.” 

“Should there be smoke?” Daisy’s tight voice pitched up. 

Darcy ignored the alarm. “Ok just a little more. We’re almost there.” 

“It’s sparking!” Daisy’s voice was straight up alarmed. 

She hissed. “A little more!” 

Daisy let out a yelp. And then Darcy wheezed as she was tackled. 

They rolled over the couch, hitting the ground with a painful thud. Darcy glared at her sister. “What the sweet Th-”

And then her prototype exploded. 

“Well that’s not good.” Darcy popped up from behind the couch and cringed. “Shitnuggets!” She lunged into the kitchen corner, diving under the counter to haul out the fire extinguisher. Fumbling with the trigger she spun and started hosing down the wreckage of her poor prototype. 

Darcy nearly lost her head as Daisy’s jacket went whipping through the air. Daisy was whacking at the flames licking one of the couch cushions. 

“So…” Darcy looked around at the metal shrapnel embedded throughout her shit hole apartment. “Good call on the tackling.” 

Daisy snorted, and then burst out laughing. 

She blew some loose hair out of her face. Which is of course when the fire alarm went off. Darcy couldn’t help it, she joined in laughing then. “Oh Thor I’m turning into Jane.” She gasped out between laughs. 

“So that’s how I tased Thor.” Darcy explained while ripping a piece of shrapnel out of the counter with her bent pliers. She grunted and then jerked suddenly as it came free. 

Daisy laughed as she kept typing from where she was attempting to recover the memory from the still smoking wreck of Darcy’s laptop. “Since you were in New Mexico does that mean you met Sif? I’ve met her twice now and she’s super badass.” 

“I did! Sif and the Warriors Three are like the big dude’s besties. Though why it’s not the Warriors Four is some sexist bullshit. Like Sif is part of their little viking gang.” Darcy moved onto the next piece of shrapnel. “But Thor is even yummier in person than he is on tv.” 

Daisy kept typing. “Yeah Sif was super hot. Totally drool worthy, I was shot and stuck in medbay for like the whole mission. Bullets just bounced off of her.” 

“And this is why you’re wearing the new bullet proof suit we made for you. It may be mostly depressingly black, but the touches of yellow really make it a look.” Darcy pointed the pliers at Daisy. “No getting bullets pulled out of you.” 

“I’ll wear the suit.” Daisy huffed. “But how are Asguardians just, so hot?” 

Darcy grinned. “If I wasn’t such a good bro to Jane I would have done more than lightly grope the big guy’s arms.” 

“Hey next time you see the big guy touch the biceps for me. For science.” Daisy leaned back. “And I got what I could but I think this thing has given up its ghost.” 

Darcy clasped her hands together in a mocking attempt at prayer. “May his soul rest in peace.” 

“I’ll clean up and mail you the next laptop I find while knocking in mobster nards.” Daisy offered while standing up and grabbing the slightly more bent pair of pliers and heading for the table. “I did not realize your shock absorber could even explode.” 

She stuck her tongue out. “ Sorry, I cheated out on the casing to get better springs and when it heated up due to the current the casing weakened faster than the springs, and well... boom” 

“Boom.” Daisy grabbed a bit of shrapnel and started wiggling it out of the table. “On the plus side that couch is shockingly sturdy. You can’t even really tell it got blown up.” 

Darcy gave the formerly green relic a look. “The burn marks compliment the pizza stains.” 

“Undoubtedly.” Daisy agreed, silent humor filling her face. 

“Oh don’t give me that look. Your fate is still in my hands, or do you want to head back to the Parker abode wearing that?” Darcy gave the slightly singed looking shirt on her sister a pointed look. 

Daisy held up her hands in surrender. “No judging the couch in exchange for a clean flannel shirt Boss.” 

“And don’t you forget it. I get big sister rights. Even if you are the rebellious middle child.” Darcy puffed up with a smug smirk. It was good to have someone who didn’t mind explosions, her crappy apartment, Asguardians, and appreciated flannel. “Now as the cool older sister, wanna run by why your appreciation of the Asguardian form sounded forced?” 

Daisy blinked, and then her shoulders slumped slightly. “That obvious?” 

“The fact that in the time we’ve known each other, brief though it may be, you’ve never so much as looked at a hot person, let alone mentioned one. It was a bit of a clue.” Darcy yanked another piece of shrapnel free. “So want to talk about it?” 

Daisy opened her mouth, head starting to shake only to pause and then she shrugged. “You know what, why the hell not. How much paint thinner pretending to be vodka do you have?” 

“So much dude.” Darcy hopped off the counter. “I could use it to deal with the fact that was my graduation project. Goodbye early graduation.” 

Daisy pulled a piece of shrapnel free and set her pliers down. “So...there’s lawn chairs on the roof right?” 

“Grab the fuzzy blankets and I’ll get the booze sister.” 

////

May Parker was reading her new romance novel when she heard a thud against the door of the apartment. She set her book aside and picked up her new taser. Slowly she pulled her throw off of her legs and approached the door. 

Which is when she heard the obnoxious drunk giggles. May groaned and marched the rest of the way to the door. She opened and raised a brow while looking down at the two brunettes that'd just spilled into her entryway. "Evening girls "

Daisy blinked up, her eyes red rimmed but she looked so much lighter. Clutched to her chest was a bottle of bubblegum flavored vodka. The girl opened her mouth and then started giggling into Darcy's shoulder. 

Darcy on the other hand was suspiciously grease stained and some of her hair looked rather charred. The girls burst into peals of laughter. They looked ridiculous. Darcy seemed to realize May had spoken first. Her voice came out in the loudest whisper known to man. "May! It's girls night!"

"Is it now?" She asked dryly.

Darcy nodded, her cheek pressed against Daisy's forehead. "Yup. Daisy's boyfriend died saving the planet from alien mind control drugs and my graduation exploded. So girls night! Drown our sorrows." She hiccups. "But then we realized you’re one of the girls too!"

May waited and realized nothing else was coming. She leaned down and grabbed under Darcy's armpits and hauled the drunk co-ed to her wobbly feet. "Come on, let's get you to bed and some water."

"You're the best." Darcy slurred while slumping most of her weight on May. 

Daisy raised a hand from the floor. "I told you she was the bestest!" She then sprang to her feet, swayed, and then hugged the door jam. Her face smooshing against the molding, dumb smile on her face. "Ninja."

“Shut the door behind you.” May instructed while dragging the drunker of the two girls to her own room. She was tired, and sticking the two drunk kids in her bed and taking the couch herself was sounding easiest. 

It was a bit like corralling a noodly sack of flour that kept insisting on giggling. May smiled as Darcy petted at her hair. She gently pushed Darcy onto the bed. Picking up the water glass on the bedside table, she pressed it into Darcy’s hands. “Drink that.” She waited till Darcy was obediently drinking before heading back into the rest of the apartment. 

May snagged the vodka Daisy was drinking straight from the bottle. She dropped the whole thing into the sink. Picking up a clean glass she filled it with water. Stepping back to Daisy she put the glass of water into her hand. “Drink up.” 

“Thanks.” Daisy’s voice was slightly slurred, but surprisingly pulled together for how horrifically drunk she had to be. But she threw the water back, guzzling it in one go. She pressed the back of one hand to her mouth, setting the glass down with the other. Her eyes were dark as they looked at May then. “How do you do it? Keep living after Ben died?” 

“Oh honey.” May stepped forward pulling the girl into her arms. “I’m so sorry. You’re far too young to have lost so much.”

Daisy’s breath hitched and then she was sobbing into May’s shoulder. 

May ran her fingers through Daisy’s hair as she sat on the edge of the bed. The girls were half asleep. Darcy had been reduced to the occasional mumble as she lay there, curled around Daisy as the big spoon. Her nose was mostly buried in her sister’s hair. Darcy’s occasional snort letting them know she would probably like to not have said hair in her face. May brushed some of Daisy’s hair out of Darcy’s face. 

“You two sleep tight.” May stood and moved only to pause in the doorway. She looked at the two girls. All three of the kids looked so different, but there was that certain something that came across as familial. She felt privileged to watch these lost kids coming together. It was messy and they were a little broken, and heroic nutts all of them. But she was pretty sure they were going to be something spectacular someday.

Not tonight though.

////

Peter came skidding into the kitchen while pulling his t-shirt over his head. “Morning!” 

“Nooooooooooo…” A hoarse female voice whined from the table. 

He blinked. “Darcy?” His eyes tracked to the lump curled protectively around a mug of coffee. “Daisy? Are you guys ok?” 

“Oh they’re just hungover.” May announced cheerfully. At the sound of her voice both of his sisters cringed. She licked her thumb, and rubbed something off of his cheek. “And this is why drinking too much is a bad idea. You’ll end up puking at two am and looking like your sisters.” 

Peter burst out with a short shock of laughter. “Uh…” 

“Thanks for the lesson in responsible drinking ladies.” May chirped, her eyes twinkling as she set Peter’s lunch on the counter. 

He grinned while filling a bowl with cereal and dumping milk over it. It was hilarious as Darcy and Daisy both twitched every time his spoon hit the sides of the bowl. 

Daisy hissed, shooting him a truly deadly glare. “Do you have to slurp that loud?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. This is how I eat.” He positively smug. 

Darcy chucked a wadded up napkin at his head. “Shut your smart mouth.” 

“Nope.” He popped the ‘p’ with as much prejudice as he could. 

May laughed. “Finish up your breakfast before you’re late for the bus young man. And I expect you home from Spiderman duties by seven so you have time to do your homework.” 

Peter landed on the roof next to Daisy. “Sup!” 

“Alien blood, hangovers pass faster for me than for humans.” Daisy swept his legs, knocking him flat. “You’re still a brat though.” 

He grinned, pulling his mask off and sitting up. “So is hero-ing usually this…”

“Boring?” Daisy grinned. “Yeah, it’s a lot of hurry up and wait. And you little bro are dealing with local petty crime. There’s a lot less petty crime requiring heroes than people think. I mean my kicking down doors and kicking mob/gang butts is cause I chase them down. They don't just sit around waiting for you.” 

Peter accepted the bottle of water from her. “So what..I babysit the neighborhood?” 

“Yeah you babysit the neighborhood. And when I get back from putting down the Watchdogs we can root out some of the entrenched criminals here.” Daisy tossed him a granola bar. 

He blinked, and then his whole face lit up. “You’re coming back?!” 

“First I’m hitting up LA. If I’m right I’m needed there. But yeah, I’ll come back.” Daisy reached out and ruffled his hair. “SHIELD is my family, but I think you guys might be too. And if you’re going to do the hero thing you’re going to need me.” 

Peter cheered, raising his fist in the air. “YES!” 

“I expect you to help old ladies with their groceries, walk people across streets, help with fender benders, get people to the hospital, the small potatoes. Get practice in. Learn navigating around the city with your webs, keep up your training. I’m sure Darcy would be happy to shoot paintballs at you.” Daisy poked his nose. “Stay safe, keep learning. I’ll let you hit up the big leagues when you’re out of high school. Till then small potatoes or with me. Got it?” 

“Got it!” He lunged forward hugging her. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.” 

She hugged him right back. 

Peter pulled back. “Does this mean you’re going to show me how to shoot one of your dendrotoxin guns?” 

“Don’t push your luck.” She cuffed him playfully. “Now, I do believe Ms Sanchez needs help taking her garbage out.” 

Peter was too excited to even pout. “Got it!”


	6. Pepper Potts and the Worst Rescue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thank you for all the great comments and everything! They really mean a lot.
> 
> Ok you'll probably notice there's been a bit of a time jump between this chapter and the last. Just assume Daisy went back to LA for like a month and dealt with the whole Ghost Rider plot from s4. Because retroactively the Agents of SHIELD timeline sucks oh my god. Like the time between s4 to the end of s5 is three months...maybe four. Which is apparently supposed to be the difference in time between Civil War and Thanos invading which is....no. That does not work. So the timeline is fucked and I'm making it make some sense.

Pepper Potts was sadly used to being kidnapped. In fact it happened so often she had three panic button/GPS tags on her person at all times. At the charity auction she'd been attending they'd respectively been her watch, phone and the heel of her stiletto. Unfortunately the entire kidnapping had gone a bit like this. 

She’d been happily bidding on a high schoolers painting, really the kid was talented and it was a joy to fund the local schools of the city. Which is when the twenty armed and masked individuals came crashing in. The crashing was not indicative of their skill level unfortunately. 

First they'd secured the room. Phones and jewelry removed first thing. The risk wasn't worth it. But she’d still had her shoes. And then Spiderman came swinging in and chaos had broken out. At least this part was familiar. 

A surprisingly fresh smelling thug grabbed her, and dragged her from the room threatening to shoot anyone who tried to stop him. Spiderman was busy preventing the criminals, clearly former military. Or possibly current military based off of gear and tactics. What was her life that she could spot these things? 

Fresh smelling goon had an arm hooked around her waist as he hauled her out of the gym and into the alley behind the school. There was a waiting van. 

Pepper tried to break free but his arm hold was like iron. She screamed for help, failed to snap her stiletto heel, and was tossed into the back of the van. Two goons were instantly on her and she was cuffed and gagged in short order. One of them had the bright idea to cuff her ankles. 

"Is that necessary?" Fresh smelling goon asked as he shut the van door, the van squealing off. 

Goon 2 grabbed her shoes and chucked them out the window. "I've been stabbed in the shin by a stiletto before and I can tell you this is necessary. Also we don't want her running if Spiderman catches up."

"Why is he even here!? We're not in Queens!" Goon three bitched from the driver's seat. 

Fresh smelling Goon 1 grabbed an AK-63 and half growled at his comrades. "Shut up and drive. If Spiderman is here that means Quake isn't far behind and we are not being paid enough to deal with that bitch."

Pepper hadn't met or dealt with the two heroes who'd taken unofficial charge of Queens and most of Brooklyn. But she was suddenly really hoping her kidnapper was right and one of them was coming for her. She jerked as something crashed onto the roof of the van. The van's roof literally dented inwards.

Fresh smelling Goon aimed up and started firing through the roof. 

The drivers side window shattered inwards, an arm with shiny metal gauntlets reached in and dragged the goon driving the van out the window. His feet and fading scream the last they saw of him.

"Fuck!" Fresh smelling goon changed his aim for the front of the van as the side door was ripped open and he was sent flying into the opposite side. He collided hard with the side of the van. There was a crunching sound as he hit and then slid down motionlessly. 

And there in the van's open door, one hand hanging onto the roof, wind blowing her short dark hair was Quake. Her black on yellow suit, face mask and gauntlets against the lights of the city at night struck an intimidating figure. The vigilante barely flicked her wrist sending the last goon present ricocheting out of the way. And then she grabbed Pepper, slinging her over her shoulder, and jumped out of the still moving van.

Pepper screamed into her gag.

Quake landed in the middle of the road. And stood resolute as more cars bristling with goons with guns squealed to a stop in front of them. The woman set her shoulders.

Spiderman landed in a three point hero's pose besides Quake. "No one gets the friendly neighborhood aesthetic. I mean military weapons do not a friendly neighborhood make." 

"Their target is Potts. Get her out of here, I'll handle the goon squad." Quake's voice had the same candance as Tony's when he knew he was about to verbally take someone he didn't like apart. 

Spiderman let out a petulant groan. "Fine, but I get to fight the overcompensating gangsters next time." He hopped, scooping Pepper off Quake's shoulder and then they were both zipping straight up as he hollered "toodles!"

Pepper had a new appreciation for Tony's rescues as Spiderman slung them like a drunk ping pong ball through the city. The swooping, jerking and stomach turning descents were nauseating. Also being carted around in a fireman's carry was humiliating. Better than kidnapping, but she hadn't wanted to ever get this up and personal with Quake or Spiderman’s butts. Also she couldn't see anything! 

"Don't worry Ms Potts! You're going to be A-ok!" Spiderman chirped pleasantly as they ricocheted somewhere. 

Pepper screamed into the gag, again. It was partially the horrifying method of travel, partially the shock from the last fifteen minutes, and mostly because she knew what a middle school boy's voice sounded like. Which meant she was being slung between buildings by a kid who couldn't be older than fifteen if she was being generous. 

They went flying through an open window. Spiderman slid to a jarring halt, and then unslung her from his shoulder leaving her back on her feet for the first time since the whole mess had begun. "There ya go." 

"What the fuck!" A female voice screeched. 

Pepper's eyes widened as a young woman, her hair messily piled on her head, leapt to her feet from the saggy couch. Actually now that she had two seconds to take in her surroundings she realized she was in what had to be a college student’s apartment. The cup noodle cups, poptart wrappers, empty energy drink cans, second-hand furniture, and the fact it was a tiny studio apartment rather gave it away. 

Spiderman cringed from the angry co-ed. "Hey Darcy."

"Don't you 'Hey Darcy' me!" The newly discovered Darcy shoved past Spiderman and with surprisingly gentle fingers pulled the gag out of Pepper's mouth and then flung it to the side. She then pulled a Bobby pin out of her hair and had picked the handcuff lock in under thirty seconds. Dropping to one knee she repeated the process with the second pair of cuffs before straightening while returning the Bobby pin to her hair. "I am so sorry lady. Are you ok?"

Pepper felt rather green actually. "I think I'm going to be sick."

"Get the bucket!" Darcy ordered in alarm.

Spiderman half tripped over himself grabbing a mixing bowl out of the cupboard and shoving it into Pepper's hands. 

Pepper was promptly sick. She felt hands pulling her hair out of the way, and someone was rubbing soft circles on her back. 

Someone disappeared along with the bowl, and then she was being shepherded to the kitchen sink, a glass of water being pressed into her hand. 

Pepper rinsed her mouth out, spitting into the sink. She let out a sigh before taking an actual drink of the water. The slight tang of tap water wasn’t exactly pleasant, but cold water was definitely a relief all the same. Straightening once she was as put together as she was going to get, she turned around. 

The small apartment now that she was looking past the various bits of clothing laying over the back of chairs and poor dietary choices, was what she recognized as half engineering lab, half college living space. The bits and pieces of machinery everywhere fit with the general feel of the place. There were large technical textbooks and papers hap-hazardly laying around as well. A suspiciously dented looking fire extinguisher laying on the floor by the side of the couch only cause of some minor alarm. 

Pepper looked between Darcy, the pretty co-ed and Spiderman who was actually hanging from the ceiling. “Thank you for the rescue. Do you think I could borrow a phone?” 

“Kid...that is Pepper Potts.” Darcy seemed to finally recognize her. She then turned and slapped Spiderman’s shoulder. 

Spiderman yelped, voice cracking slightly, and then dropped to the floor. “Da..Quake said to get her out. And what if more bad guys with guns were waiting at the Tower?” 

“So you brought her to my apartment!?” Darcy wheeled on Spiderman, completely ignoring Pepper now. “Did you miss the basics of keeping a secret identity?! Your aunt is going to kill me! Quake is going to kill you! I mean running around like a maniac in bulletproof pajamas is one thing but you bought Pepper Potts into my apartment!? Do you think she won’t be able to track down who I am from that and from me to you!?” 

Spiderman seemed to physically wince. “But she’s practically our ste….well you know?” 

“No she’s not! And we agreed no contact with Tony! Bringing his girlfriend to my apartment is not no contact!” Darcy’s arms waived. “Dear Thor this is not good.” 

Pepper cleared her throat. She was going to ignore any and all subtext till she’d had time to sleep and process her night. “I’m assuming you run tech for Spiderman here Ms Darcy?” 

“I make-” Spiderman started. 

Darcy whacked him in the gut. “Yes?” She plastered on a fake smile. “Yes, Darcy. Mechanical and snack related support to Spiderlad.” 

“Spiderman!” The kid protested, but in more of a token attempt than anything else. 

Pepper’s lips twitched. This was actually explaining a lot of the confusing media attention around New York's new heroes. “I understand your need to keep secret identities. But I would also like to go home and prevent Tony from doing something stupid. So, any options you’d feel comfortable with that don’t involve me being swung out of here like a sack of potatoes?” 

“Swear on Stark’s sparkly ass to not make me move out of my shitty apartment to escape the paps and we’ll call you an uber.” Darcy offered. 

Her years with Tony made her response automatic. “I swear on his sparkly ass not to sell you out to the media.” 

“Excellent.” Darcy’s face pulled up into a victorious grin, all casual and familiar confidence. “So you ok with uber? I’ll make the kid walk you to the curb and everything.” 

Pepper smiled, god they were kids. No wonder they avoided the big dramatic villains and just dealt with local petty things and helped locals with groceries. Spiderman was a teen or preteen. Darcy couldn’t be a day older than twenty five and she hadn’t gotten a good look at her, but she’d bet anything Quake was young as well. “I’m fine with an uber.” 

Spiderman’s head snapped to the window, and then Quake came hurtling through the window landing with a heavy thud, everything not attached to walls rattling. Quake looked up and took in the situation. “We’ve got a problem.” 

“No we don’t.” Spiderman said holding up his hands and waving them. “We’re just going to call Ms Potts an Uber.” 

Quake’s voice was serious, she was issuing orders. “No we’re not.” She looked straight to Darcy. “We’re bugging out. Grab the bags and get to the van. Take Potts and head for the airport.” She turned to Spiderman. “Call Aunt May tell her it’s a White situation. Then drop the blue flashdrive with Stark before meeting us at the airport.” 

“Oh Thor...they’re never letting me back on the debate team.” Spiderman grumbled before swinging out of the window. 

Pepper turned in alarm as Darcy dragged a dufflebag out from under the bed and started shoving various electronic bits and pieces into it. “Wait a minute!”

“I’m really sorry about all this, but I’ll explain later.” Quake grabbed a box from under the sink and started mixing chemicals that very much should not be mixed. The woman dumped the horrifying concoction on the counter. “Short version is AIM. If you want to get out of the city alive help Darcy with the bags.” 

Pepper nodded and grabbed a pair of shoes by the door and started lacing them up. She was going to need to be able to run. Whether it was with the baby superheroes or away from them she wasn’t entirely sure. 

Quake grabbed a shoebox out of a cupboard and pulled out a handgun. “I need to go and grab the paperwork.” She passed the gun to Darcy. “Someone tries to stop you, shoot them.” 

“Aye aye.” Darcy accepted the gun, her nose wrinkling up. “I don’t deserve my life being this weird.” She grabbed Pepper’s arm and hauled them out of the studio. 

Pepper stumbled in the slightly too large convers, hanging onto the duffle bag that’d just been shoved into her arms. “Why are you taking me with you?” 

“Code White means the Avengers are assembled.” Darcy replied matter of factly. “Not as crazy balls as code Purplenurbles, but I’m mostly sure we were just drunk when we came up with code Purplenurbles.” 

Pepper’s jaw tightened. She followed the surprisingly task oriented co-ed. They jogged at a slightly panicked clip down the stairs and out a side door into an alley. 

“This way.” Darcy led her down the alley, past dumpsters that smelled pretty putrid. 

Pepper spotted a giant wasp the size of a volkswagen flying overhead. Nope, she was throwing her lot in with team co-ed. 

They took a turn into a narrower alley. And then Darcy unlocked the single skiviest van Pepper had ever beheld. “Right, hop in, stay in the back.” 

“Do I want to know?” Pepper asked while opening the back door of the van and freezing. It was full of weapons and computer screens mounted on the inner walls of the van. She grit her teeth and climbed in. 

Darcy started up the van. “Quake lived in this thing before we met if you can believe it. I mean housing options for former SHIELD specialists with Inhuman abilities are hard to find. Something about the crazies trying to kill you. At least it doesn’t smell.” 

“How on god's green earth is she old enough to be former SHIELD?” Pepper pointedly didn’t touch the gun chest as the van squealed out of the alley. 

Darcy snorted. “Teenage cyber terrorist. SHIELD black bagged and then recruited her when she was seventeen. Then four years of service. Apparently SHIELD follows military rules that you can recruit at seventeen with parental permission. Not that Quake had that, but details.” 

“Well that's horrifying,” Pepper uttered. She settled as safely as possible on the tiny cot in the back. “What’s the plan once we get to the airport?” 

“Oh we’re not going to the airport.” Darcy replied glibly. “Quake’s super paranoid and the spider kid gets way too into the secret agent code mumbojumbo. We are actually going to a shitty motel till this all blows over.” 

Pepper blinked, that was actually rather clever. “And by blow over?” 

“Spiderman is going to run civilian rescues in Queens till the end of the bullshit and then come crash in the shitty motel with us. Quake is running some quick recon and then is probably going to be taking care of AIM while everyone else deals with what I’m pretending are not giant wasps attacking the city.” 

Pepper cleared her throat. “So code White?”

“City wide destruction and or invasion that requires Quake and Spiderman to play in the big leagues and us squishy non super powered idiots need to go hide out. Hit the green toggle. It’s the one that’s melted crayon.” Darcy instructed, the van jerking to the left. 

She hit the green toggle, that was indeed super waxy. 

////

Peter yelped as he almost hit a lamppost. “We’re all insects here!” 

The giant wasp and it’s dozens of tiny brethren didn’t seem to agree with him. 

-”Technically you’re an arachnid not an insect.”- Daisy grunted, a burst of gunfire audible on her end of their comms. 

He pouted while spraying more webbing into a sloppy attempt at a proper web. It probably didn’t catch many of the evil insects, but some was better than none. “It’s the thought that counts!” 

-”Code names only, I’m connecting us to the Avengers’ comms.”- Daisy warned, there was a concerning amount of gunfire in the background. There was a crackle, and then new voices were coming through. 

-”I don’t think they can get bigger than a truck.”- A male voice came through before grunting. 

Peter swung straight up above the buildings around him. He saw how the wasps that saw him changed direction and started heading for him. “Hey Avengers! Big fan. Bringing the party to your tower.” 

-”Who is that?”- A strong voice ordered. 

He slung himself forward. “Just your friendly neighborhood Spiderman!” 

-”How’d you get this channel? Actually scratch that, how do you see out of those goggles?”- Tony Stark’s distinctive voice asked. 

Peter hopped over a roof. “It’s an honor Mr Stark, Sir.”

-”Not as good to meet you buckaroos. Big fan of the webs. Seems like a good time for webs.”- Stark quipped. -”Think you can make a bigger web, trap Swarm in a sticky mess?”-

Peter webbed a cart sized wasp to a wall. “That would require standing still.” He yelped. 

Daisy’s voice came through, and again that was a lot of gunfire on her end. -”Just funnel the murderous wasps. I’m almost done with the AIM agents. If you can get the wasps in a relatively straight line I can turn them into dust.”-

-”You expect us to just take orders from strange women with guns now?”- Tony protested. -”I mean I see the appeal, but really?”-

Peter webbed a large wasp and sling shotted it at the passing form of Ironman. “Quake isn’t strange! She’s supes cool.”-

-”Not now!” And Ironman if you want to know how ‘skyenet’ is turning your firewalls to swiss cheese you’ll do it.”- The smile in Daisy’s voice was audible. 

There was an explosion of spluttering. And then the serious voice came through. -”Team, funnel the wasps towards the Tower.”-

Peter’s web hit his sister’s back, and then he launched her up into the path of the very, very angry wasps. 

Her arms raised, the very air trembled. And then the swarm of thousands of insects varying in size from thumbnail to small pick up truck turned to dust in a wave of chaos. 

He caught her around the waist with one arm on a swing, and landed against the side of a building, holding her up. “Hey you ok? Nothing break? Quake? Come on talk to me?”

“I thought I told you to evac civilians and let the Avengers and I handle the crisis?” She looked at him with a fond smile. “But good job.” 

Peter blushed under his mask. “Thanks, and I don’t know, the wasps just kept swarming me. Not my fault.” 

The artificial voice of Ironman came from just besides them. “Well you are The Spiderboy? Spiderling?” 

“Spiderman.” Daisy corrected while throwing an arm around Peter’s shoulders so he wasn’t hanging onto her so awkwardly. 

“Right that.” Ironman’s face mask pulled up, showing Tony Stark’s face. “Good work dusting the bugs. So what’s this about you knowing about ‘skyenet’?” 

Daisy pulled the blue flash drive out of Peter’s pocket and tossed it at Tony’s face. “Secure channel for you to chat on. Thanks for assisting Spiderman, we’re gonna head home now if you don’t mind.” 

“Oh I do mind.” Tony caught the drive, looking at them curiously. “So what’re you? Like some powered Romeo and Juliet or something?” 

Peter couldn’t help the “Oh ew!” 

Daisy laughed. “Never figured you for a fan of the classics. Does the media know you’re a softie under there?” 

“No romance jokes, got it.” Tony’s mustache twitched. But then his voice was serious. “So, want to say where you took Pepper?”

Peter found himself babbling slightly. “Our guy in the chair took her to a safehouse.” 

“Guy in the chair?” Tony asked. 

He nodded. “Yeah, like tech person. You know the guy in the chair. Back end and all that.” 

“Look how do you feel about letting us hitch a ride to the safe house with you? Cause my van is at the safehouse and taking public transport while in costume sucks.” Daisy cocked her head as if she wasn’t dangling from the side of a building depending on him to keep her there. “We could pick up pizza?”

////

Darcy munched on a burger while watching the news on the shitty tv in the shitty motel room. “So how do you feel about street tacos?” 

“I’d rather not have food poisoning in this establishment.” Pepper replied somewhat dryly. 

She snickered. “Fair, fair. Gotta say it’s nice to meet you. Like you’re a Pepper freaking Potts.” 

“You know it took me a bit, but I’ve spent a lot of time with Tony.” Pepper looked at her, eyes seemingly boring into her soul. 

Darcy swallowed. “Oh?” 

“You look like him, especially around the cheeks. And that’s definitely his chin.” Pepper’s voice was surprisingly gentle. 

She shrugged, her lips pulling up. “What gave it away? Besides the resemblance.” 

“The kid in the suit almost called me your stepmom. Which would make the three of you siblings. Same mom, different dads?” Pepper asked, the slightest of hopeful tinge to her voice. 

Darcy smirked. “Different moms, same dad.” She pulled her legs up under her, crossing her legs. “Quake’s the one who figured it out. Turns out condoms have failure rates.” 

“Why not come to him?” Pepper had barely reacted to the news they were all Tony’s kids. She had an impressive poker face. 

She rolled her eyes. “We didn’t need a dad.” Darcy paused at the look on Pepper’s face. “Fine, look it’s complicated. The kid’s parents died in a car wreck, finding out his mom had an affair with his personal hero was a bit rough. And Quake’s got issues with parents. Foster kid, bio mom tried to murder her when she tracked the woman down. Throw in the whole powers thing and Quake is former SHIELD. It’s not like it’s going to be smooth going once it all comes out.” 

“Tony deserves to know he has children. All of you deserve a chance at a relationship.” Pepper’s voice was soft and sincere. 

Darcy sucked at the inside of her cheek. “Technically Tony’s going to hire me in a month. I figured the system would flag me as his kid during the health screening process. Which mandatory on site medical screening to ensure your employees health is very cool. Especially since it can’t be cause of termination.” 

“Oh?” Pepper leaned back in the shitty motel chair she was sitting on. She’d taken one look at the mildewy beds, wrinkled her nose, and claimed the chair. 

Darcy nodded. “I’m Jane Foster’s former intern. Since I’m on track to graduate this month I get the fancy upgrade from intern to official assistant.” 

“You’re Darcy Lewis, Thor’s lightning sister.” Pepper laughed. “Of course you are.” 

She snickered herself. “Did you think any of Tony’s kids could be boring?” 

“How old are all of you? Because I know what a teenage boy’s voice sounds like.” Pepper smiled. 

Darcy bounced on the foot of the bed slightly. “Kid’s turning fifteen next month. Quake just turned twenty two, and I’m the oldest at twenty five. Which Thor I feel ancient around them. Look, let them come to Tony when they’re ready. The kid might be soon. He really wanted to meet him before he processed the whole affair thing. But Quake…” She shrugged. “Pushing her won’t lead to anything good.” 

“I won’t insist on two conditions.” Pepper offered. 

Darcy’s eyes narrowed. “Negotiations, my specialty.” She felt positively feral at Pepper’s confused expression. “Political Science undergrad degree, getting my doctorate in mechanical engineering this month. Gotta say, I miss the poly sci.” 

“Politics...a Stark with a degree in Politics.” Pepper pinched the bridge of her nose before seemingly shaking herself out of it. “You tell Tony if your siblings haven’t come around to telling him themselves by the end of the coming year.” 

Darcy shook her head. “Not happening. I’ll let you have their cell numbers in a year if they haven’t told him.” 

“Six months if I’m only getting phone numbers. And you have to tell Tony he has other kids.” Pepper countered. 

She cocked her head slightly. “Six months, and I tell Tony I’m not his only kiddo if it’s necessary for stupid hero reasons. And if that’s not acceptable I sue for a nice trust fund and make a delightful media circus.” 

“Agreed.” Pepper nodded. “Second condition, you and your siblings keep in contact with me and if you need help just ask.” 

Darcy blinked. “Huh, you’re good people Potts.” 

“And you’re going to finish the work Tony’s done to turn my hair grey.” Pepper sighed. “And you already have a trust fund. I had one formed my second month as Tony’s assistant. It was kind of inevitable a kid would turn up eventually.” 

Darcy snorted. “Yeah, at least if he creates another spawn it’ll be on purpose. Which, good job on snagging him. I mean he’s dad hot, and a total manwhore. But also a superhero so he’s got to have some redeeming qualities.” 

“I’m taking that as a compliment.” Pepper huffed in amusement. Though her eyes stopped on the tv screen. “Oh dear.” 

Darcy looked over and snorted outright. There was a very dramatic series of photos showing Peter webbing, flinging and then catching Daisy. It was a pretty awesome final destruction of the killer wasps. But what the media was clearly focusing on was the new question. ‘Were Spiderman and Quake a Superhero couple?’ She lunged for the remote and cranked up the volume. “Oh my Thor this is amazing!” 

“Oh dear.” Pepper sounded like she knew exactly the level of havoc a pair of embarrassed Stark kids could kick up in the media. 

Darcy cackled.

On the screen the station’s hero specialist, hack journalist, was pontificating. -”This makes the newly teamed up super pair’s behavior make sense. Afterall we all know Quake was a questionable vigilante ever since she appeared on the scene. Property damage, dead criminals, and a wake of destruction behind her. Then she turns up in New York covering our local hero’s back. Almost no property damage, no dead criminals. What else but love would explain the personality change?”-

Darcy rolled off the bed from the strength of her cackling.


	7. Congratulations, That's One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for all the comments! I'm still writing this fic. But I'm to chapter 18 and I think I see vaguely the end...god this thing is going to be a long one.

Daisy dribbled the basketball around a kid and then passed to a teen wearing a yellow bandana marking her as on the same team. “Pass!” 

The girl caught the pass and then jumped shooting for the freshly duct taped hoop. 

She cheered, high fiving the girl while jogging after the kid in the blue bandana that had secured the ball. 

Sipping from a bottle of water, feet kicking out off the side of the skyscraper she was sitting on, Daisy pondered what to do. Being a civilian vigilante was surprisingly...boring? But that was definitely something flying towards her. Boring afternoon canceled hopefully. She raised a brow as she saw who was flying to her. She waited till he was floating just in front of her. “What brings the great Tony Stark to Queens?” 

“What? I can’t just fly down to say hi? Mingle with the people? Social media says you’re hip with the streets.” His suit landed, he stepped out of it with all the drama of a man who not only was used to it, but expected to be the center of attention at all times. 

Daisy raised a brow at him. “Wow, you’re just an old fuddy duddy aren’t you?” 

“You did not just call me a fuddy duddy.” He looked at her in horror. 

She leaned back. “I did, and you are. I mean those teeth? Have you considered veneers?” 

“Veneers? Now that’s just slander.” His eyes were bright and amused. “And I came down here on my best behavior.” 

Daisy laughed softly under her breath. “So what are you doing down here, really?” 

“Job offer. Your little tech support friend is starting next week. And your hacking skills are wasted just funneling illegal slush funds into charities.” He shrugged before sitting down on the ledge next to her. “If you can hack SI, you can protect it too.” 

She considered that. Having a job besides stopping muggers might be nice. “Fine, I’ve been kinda bored since I got here anyways. But I want to be part time. And no health test. We both know I’d pass with flying colors, and SI isn’t going to be storing my Inhuman DNA anywhere on it’s flimsy servers.” 

“I’d be insulted by that if you weren’t ‘skyenet’. Deal though, no take backsies.” He held out his hand, seemingly cringing slightly as he did it. 

She rolled her eyes and held up a fist. Daisy’s lips twitched at the relief on his face as they bumped knuckles. “You are a neurotic ass, did you know that?” 

“So I’ve been told, it’s part of my charm.” He wagged a finger in her face. “No crushing on the boss. I’m a one woman guy these days.” 

Daisy gave him a piting look. “I’ve got daddy issues, but they’re not that bad.” 

He pressed a hand to his chest. “I’m wounded, really. I’ll have you know I’m quite the catch, very crush worthy.” 

“Hmm.. sure you are.” She just grinned at his affront. “Now Scarlet Witch on the other hand, very cute. Also I’m only human, Thor and Steve are hunks and I have eyes.” 

Tony’s eyes lit up. “You play for both teams? Interesting. But how is Steve on your list of hottest Avengers and I don’t rank? I’m your boss. This is insubordination.” 

“Don’t you read the papers? I’m in a passionate romance with Spiderman. He’s redeemed my broken soul with his kindness and manliness.” Daisy had come round on the fact it was hilarious by day two. It helped Peter turned a shade of red she hadn’t know he could, anytime it was mentioned within his hearing. It was precious. 

Her biological father, not that he knew that, scoffed. “Ah yes, your great romance. You know I’m almost insulted you two ‘lovebirds’ got all the credit for the wasp incident.” 

Daisy snickered. “Not going to lecture me about hacking you then?” 

“Eh, you were annoyingly right about the Accords. That doesn’t happen often.” He gave her a pointed look. “Don’t go getting any big ideas. Some sort of accountability has to happen.” 

She held her hands up in surrender. “I’m just the brawn and the hacking. If you want ethical or legal advice you should talk to Darcy.” Daisy considered how to put it to ensure that Tony didn’t put the connection between the three of them together. It was painfully obvious Peter and her were related based on how he reacted anytime their ‘romance’ was brought up. “She’s our Pepper really. Only hotter.”

“Ethical advice?” Tony scoffed. “Please, my lawyers don’t even let me sleep without telling them now, thanks to you.” 

Daisy set her hands down on the edge of the ledge, bracing herself. “Their job is to protect your shiny ass. Team Spiderquake is indifferent to your financial wellbeing. And Darcy’s already on team Thor. Think about it. Toodles.” She pushed off, sending herself plummeting down, only to catch herself with her vibrations. 

“So, I talked to Tony today.” Daisy snagged an apple out of the fruit bowl. “I apparently am now a hacker for SI during the day.” 

May looked up over the rims of her reading glasses. “Really? I would have expected you to punt him honestly.” 

“Darcy starts working with him tomorrow.” Daisy bit into her apple. “Do you think if we shot him with paintballs I’d get to keep my ‘too cool for school’ rep?” 

May went back to her paperwork. “I’m sure you’ll manage. And we’re going out for dinner, the casserole started smoking.” 

“I love you feeding me, but have you considered cooking classes for fun? I’d pay, you could meet people your own age, a little slice of normal?” Daisy critically checked that May was in good health, and she was. But she worried. 

May typed at what was likely an email. “I probably should. And don’t go get any ideas of making dinner to surprise me. Darcy’s the only Stark allowed in my kitchen if we don’t all want food poisoning. Again.” 

“I still don’t know how I messed up that bad.” Daisy winced at the reminder of all four of them fighting over the bathroom. It’d been an unfortunate night. 

“It was very sweet of you.” May gave her a fond smile before focusing back on her work. “I do think it’s good you’re getting a job though. You’ve been antsy.” 

Daisy pouted slightly, but shrugged in acceptance. “Yeah the neighborhood basketball teams will miss my presence, not that I’m ditching them permanently. But you know how it is.” 

“You’re an adrenaline junky living the domestic life. You’ve been bored dear.” May suddenly looked up over her screen. “Actually if you have some time could you go grocery shopping for me? We’re out of bread.” 

“Totes.” Daisy tossed her apple core into the trash. “Anything else you need?” 

“List is on the fridge. And no energy drinks. You and Peter are still banned from consuming them.” May was never going to let that go, break two lamps and then crash one time. 

Daisy laughed while snagging the list. “I’ll pick up Peter on my way back. We can take the evening off from hero work. It’s pretty slow today and Ironman was seen in the neighborhood. It should stay that way.” 

“Do you think mexican sounds good for dinner?” May asked, she looked rather conflicted. “I know we’re not celebrating Darcy’s graduation till tomorrow, but it could be festive?” 

Daisy lit up. “We’ll make sure they stick a sombrero on her head.” 

////

Darcy jittered with nerves as she stepped into Stark Industries. Today was her first day and there was no going back after this. But Janey! Thor she had missed Jane. Skype wasn’t exactly a safe method of explaining her bio dad was Tony Stark, or that she had two siblings because Tony Stark was a manwhore...manslut? And that she was now tech guru to two super heroes because she was a softy and made poor decisions while stressed. She needed Jane and margaritas.

She wished she had the cool striding with purpose thing Daisy did. Or even Peter’s teen bobbing motion. Instead she was left to walk like a normal person to the front desk. “Hello, Darcy Lewis. First day, I need the whole first day shebang stuff.” 

The woman in a perfectly ironed suit, not a hair out of place, in fact she looked like one of those freaky alien characters from a movie. One of the ones so perfectly put together you know they weren’t human. Her name tag said her name was ‘Joy’. She did not seem joyful as a customer service smile from hell graced her face, showing off the whitest teeth Darcy had ever seen. “Welcome to SI Ms Lewis. If you would follow me please.” 

“Cool.” Darcy trotted behind the woman, which damn was she an amazonian or something? Was that a thing now? 

They made their way to a small conference room with several doors opening up to offices. Joy grabbed a neatly labeled stack of papers and set them on the table. She then turned and looked at her, the woman’s eyes were dead inside. “Please fill these out. Mr Freeman from security will assist with the rest of your intake process. Have a nice day and welcome to the SI family.” 

Joy’s plastic smile stretched unnaturally, and then the woman turned and left. 

Darcy’s shoulders slumped. “Damn.” She looked at the paperwork. Oh her morning was going to be so fun….just...so fun. 

“Aaaaa.” Darcy stuck her tongue out while the doctor on staff swabbed the inside of her cheek. 

Dr.Gonzalez chuckled while dropping the swab into a plastic tube. “You are a remarkably healthy young woman. Up your vitamin D and iron intake though. And don’t forget the mandatory yearly physicals. If you need any other medical aid it’s covered by your new health insurance. If anything of concern comes back from your tests we’ll call you. But everything looks good. Do you have any questions for me?” 

“Nope, I'm good dude. So I get my badge now?” She hopped off the exam table. 

He handed her a sheet of paper. “Go ahead and give that to Mr Freeman and he’ll escort you to your new job.” 

“Coolio.” She patted the man’s shoulder. “Thanks for the health check.” 

Dr Gonzalaz laughed, opening the door for her. “Have a good day.” 

“You too bud.” Darcy would have warned him about the fact he was probably going to be set upon by lawyers as soon as that saliva swab’s dna pinged as being half Stark dna. Sadly she was likely to not get her shiny new badge if she mentioned such a thing. Instead she stepped back out into the new hire conference room, six other individuals desperately scribbling away at paperwork and accepted her new employee badge. 

“JANEY!” Darcy lunged half tackling her bestie. 

Jane laughed bright and happy as she hugged her back just as tightly. “Darcy! I’ve missed you! And I’m so proud!” Jeame pulled back a delighted expression on her face. “And your doctorate!” 

Darcy slapped her hands down on Jane’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry for judging you by the poptarts, mess, and general crazy. I’ve turned into you Janey. It’s horrifying. How do we survive?!” 

“Interns.” Jane gave a solemn nod, but her eyes were crinkled around the sides. “Come see the new lab!” 

She hooked their arms together. “We are doing margaritas and sharing as soon as five o’clock rolls around because girl do I have news!” 

“But...fine. But only because it’s been ages since I’ve seen you.” Jane agreed with a pout. But then she didn’t let herself get dragged out of the lab that early, ever. So big win. 

Darcy beamed. “You’ll have to meet everyone. This super awesome lady, May Parker just got this cutest little house. We’re moving her over this weekend. But I’m gonna be renting a room from her.”

“But you have a room here in the tower?” Jane’s brow furrowed. “It’s in my contract you have to have a space with me.” 

Darcy leaned over and smacked a kiss on Jane’s cheek. “Janey my love, I do not wish to hear the mating habits of my sister from another mister and an Asgardian god. Sides, this way I’ll get actual sunlight and leave the tower.” 

“That’s.” Jane whacked her stomach. “Fine. But you’ll always have a place with me.” 

Darcy smiled. “I know, and you’re gonna understand why the ‘sister from another mister’ is hilarious later. But for now show me the frankenbots so I can make sure they’re being held together by something other than duct tape and spit.” 

////

Tony burst into Pepper’s office because...well he burst into Pepper’s office. “PEPPER!” 

She looked up at his pale gaping face. “I see Darcy’s DNA finished processing then?” 

“You knew!?” His voice was strangled in panic. 

Pepper stood up and poured him a glass of scotch...the world was officially ending for her to provide him with alcohol this early in the day. She handed it to him. “She looks like you, and we spent three very interesting hours together. Also Spiderman almost called me her step-mom. Not to mention I saw her apartment, it wasn’t difficult to put together.” 

“But...I can’t be a dad? I mean...a kid?” He squawked. 

Pepper’s mouth twitched slightly. “Well Tony I thought you knew this, but when a woman and a man love each other very much-” 

“Pepper!” He blanched and then downed the tumblr of scotch. “Oh god and this is why Quake was laughing at me. Quake...Pepper! My daughter cannot be spending time with a dangerous vigilante who kills people like Quake! Unacceptable.” 

Pepper raised a single brow. “Tony, no.” 

“Quake’s dangerous! Sure I hired her for cyber security, but you didn’t see what she did to those AIM agents before she turned up to take care of the wasps. And the havoc she caused chasing down the Watchdogs! It’s not safe!” Oh god his daughter...daughter jeezus, was mixed up with terrorists.

Pepper stepped between him and the door. “Tony, breathe.” She waited till he’d stilled long enough to take a whole breath. “Now Quake is a good person, you like her. It’s why you hired her. I believe the words were ‘future Avenger once she’s trained up that kid of her’s.” 

“But-”

“No buts Tony.” Pepper stepped over and straightened his collar. “You are going to go down to Dr Foster’s lab and introduce yourself to your daughter. Yes, she already knows and is probably expecting you. You will not turn into a hypocritical caveman. Show her some robots or something. Understood?” 

He swallowed nodding. “I can do that. I can do that.” He set his face and marched out of the office and straight for the elevator. Tony was practically vibrating out of his skin by the time the doors opened. 

How was he supposed to talk to a kid? This wasn’t supposed to happen! Tony was sweating as he burst into Dr Foster’s lab. He felt manic as he spotted the girl. 

Darcy was elbow deep in the guts of one of Foster’s franken creations. “Jane! You didn’t insulate anything in this! How has it not exploded?” 

“It works perfectly fine.” Foster waved off from where she was running something. 

Darcy snorted. “It really, really doesn’t.” 

And...oh she was his kid wasn’t she? A mini-Stark. He cleared his throat. “So I hear somebody has been keeping secrets from her new boss?” 

“Sup!” Darcy grinned as she spotted him. “So should I call you Tony, Stark, or Sperm Donor?” 

Tony choked on a laugh as he approached her. God, she looked so much like his mother. How had he not noticed when he’d been picking Pepper up? “You can call me Tony.” 

“Cool, then you can call me Darcy.” She extracted herself from the frankencreature she’d been working on and straightened up. “So you need processing time or you up for oozing lasagna from the tower cafeteria?” 

He snorted. “You’re a Stark, we have food that won’t give you heartburn in the penthouse.” 

“What?” Foster looked between them. “I repeat what is happening?” 

Darcy patted Foster on the shoulder, leaving a greasy smudge on the doctor’s shirt. “Janey, this is my bio-dad. Ya know how Brad is my step dad right? Well turns out during mom’s party years she hooked up with Stark. Which, I am never letting her judge me for bad choices when she slept with Mr STD over there.” 

“Hey now, I’m an incredibly desirable catch.” Tony protested. He wasn’t used to not quite keeping up with banter and it was discombobulating. 

Darcy waved him off with casual confidence. “I’m sure your awards from Witch Weekly for Most Charming Smile were very nice. But anyways, the mechanical know-how is genetic. Who knew.” 

Tony beamed, she was perfect. And probably going to be keeping him on his toes. “So lunch in the penthouse ladies? I might even show you muggles my framed Smile awards.” 

“Wouldn’t miss it.” Darcy grinned. 

////

Peter sat down on his bed, holding a framed photo of himself and Uncle Ben. It didn’t hurt like it had at first. But it still hurt. 

“Peter are you-” May’s voice cut off. And then she moved besides him and sat down. “I haven't seen that one in a while.” 

He couldn’t bring himself to look away from the picture. It’d been from a habitat for humanity build. They’d both been tired, covered in sawdust and so happy as they laughed. Ben’s hand resting on his shoulder. “I miss him.” 

“I do too.” May laid her hand on his back. “He was terrible at talking to women. Very principled but when he first met he looked like he was in pain. Bit of a square really.” She huffed amusement. “Did I ever tell you about how we met?” 

Peter looked up at her. “Not in a while.” 

“Well we’ll have to fix that.” May smiled softly, a certain sorrow to her but genuine joy there as well. “Well Mary was this obnoxious tween I had to watch after school. And the cool place to hang out was the ice cream parlor. So Mary is working on her homework, and I’m talking to Sarah and Katherine. And Ben comes tripping over my backpack, knocks Sarah’s milkshake everywhere.” 

He felt a warm rush as he heard about his uncle’s flailings over dumping ice-cream across four girls. It involved a lot of stuttering, blushing and stiffly walking Mary and May home and generally being super awkward. It was funny to hear about Ben back before the man had been confident in everything. “Do you think..what do you think he’d think about well...everything?” 

“I think he’d march down to Stark Tower and try to punch Stark in the face for mistreating women. He’d be very self righteous about it. He’d follow you and Daisy around in that old truck of his with a baseball bat to make sure you stayed safe. But he’d be so, so proud of you.” May cupped his cheek. “I’m proud of you.” 

Peter’s cheeks heated as he pulled away. He felt like squirming out of the affection and embarrassing feelings. “I uh...yeah.” 

“Looking forward to missing school tomorrow?” She leaned back, giving him more space. 

He grinned. “Yeah, already have everything packed. We’re going to have our own house!” 

“I’m still going to miss this place.” She bumped his shoulder with hers. “And we’re going to have to get extra fire extinguishers if Daisy is going to keep insisting on helping in the kitchen.” 

Peter huffed at that. “You catch the kitchen on fire at least once a month.” 

“I didn’t hear that.” She pushed his shoulder gently. “And that’s not even getting into the chaos Darcy brings with her.” 

He laughed, Darcy’s inventions tended to explode in ways that were unpredictable. “I made a new web type. Do you wanna see?” 

“Sure, what’s this one do?” May looked at him curiously, smile on her face. 

Peter lunged and grabbed his web shooters. He and Darcy had been working on them so they were way cooler now. “So instead of just shooting strands of webbing I have this cartridge I can swap in that lets me shoot whole webs!” He aimed it at the door and clicked the button. 

A web launched across the door. It was beautiful, all nicely laid webbing. “It’ll keep people tied up for the police, or catch giant mutating insects or whatever. Isn’t it sweet?” 

“That’s very sweet.” May congratulated only to pause. “Did you just lock us in this room though?” 

“Ah….fuck.” Peter’s shoulders slumped. 

May cuffed his shoulder. “No swearing in the house.” 

“I learned it from you!” He grinned bouncing off the bed. 

Her eyes narrowed playfully. “Just for that I’m showing your sisters the bathtub photos.” 

“No!” He squawked.


	8. Tony is a Feral Cat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! You know I'm writing chapter twenty right now and I'm gonna be honest, Darcy might end up paired with someone different...I don't know. It's early days. This fic is so not about the pairings.

Daisy landed at the mouth of the alley. “Mugging? Really? In broad daylight too.” She shook her head at the stunned looking mugger and muggie. 

The mugger stepped back holding his hands up. “Please don’t hurt me.” 

“I’m not going to hurt you.” Daisy rolled her eyes while pulling out a set of zipties. “Feel like cooperating?” 

He winced but nodded. “Don’t expect you’ll let me run for it? I can promise to not do it again?” 

“Sadly you’re a bit old for a kid making a dumb mistake.” Daisy caught his hands quickly cinching them together. She looked at the ruffled looking muggie. “You ok?” 

Muggie fumbled, shoving his wallet back into his pockets. “Yeah...I’m good. Real good.” 

“Want me to walk you anywhere?” She asked while slapping one of the cheap gps trackers on the mugger’s forehead for the police. 

Muggie winced but shook their head. “No thanks...so uh...do I just wait here for the police to show up?” 

“Basically, it’s a bit boring but if we just leave him here the police can’t really do anything.” Daisy shrugged. 

Muggie sighed. “Well at least you’re following through. Not like those Avengers just going in and blowing people up.” He cocked his head to the side. “So uh...can you do a backflip like Spiderman?” 

Daisy sighed. “I can do a backflip.” She dropped a hand onto her hip as she saw the man pulling out his phone. So this was happening...Peter owed her. 

Daisy piggy backed through FRIDAY’s security protocols. Sure everything was going crazy since the incident in Lagos. It was the fuck up that they’d been hoping wouldn’t happen. They were in free fall politically now. But she was more concerned that no one had seen Wanda since the incident. Which stank to high heaven thank you very much. 

“Do I want to know what you’re doing?” Aunt May asked as she set her keys aside. 

Daisy didn’t look up from where she was cautiously wiggling her way into the security feeds. “I think they locked Wanda up.” 

“The government?” Aunt May asked, stepping behind her and looking over her shoulder, not that the laptop screen would give away much. 

Daisy bit at her lower lip. “No, the Avengers. She hasn’t showed up at all since the Lagos incident. And I think they’ve put her under house arrest. But her apartment hasn’t been accessed since the week before everything. So now I’m tracing her access codes through the systems.” 

“Why would they do that? They’re a team?” Aunt May’s voice was slightly dangerous then. 

She frowned as she carefully let a virus in to distract FRIDAY. Damn AI was smarter than it should be. “They’re not a team, they’re a group of highly skilled and powerful individuals with similar agendas. And Wanda is new, and has the type of power that makes people do stupid things.” 

“You think Stark would allow that over collateral damage? I mean what happened was terrible, but Stark?” She stared at her in disbelief. 

Daisy leaned back as she finally found what she’d been looking for. “I don’t think, I know.” She pointed at the screen. “She was given access to her new apartment in the Jersey facility and then all of her access was revoked. The doors literally won’t open for her, in fact according to this security protocol the entire facility would go into lock down if she tried. And Vision is locked in with her.” 

“That is...fuck.” Aunt May laid her hand on Daisy’s shoulder. “What are we going to do?” 

Daisy frowned. “Well Peter and I will have to break her out. Figure Darcy can delay Stark. I’ll have to do something about Vision...he is an AI...I could build a virus to infect him with. As long as it takes him a few hours it wouldn’t cause any permanent harm.” 

“You’re going to attack the Avengers?” It was a testament to their lives that Aunt May just sounded exasperated. 

She nodded.”Probably, have to talk to the others about it though.” 

“I’ll call Darcy, Peter should be here in another half hour anyways.” Aunt May opened up the drawer with take out menus. “Well, pizza for dinner it is since we’re arguing ethics tonight.” 

Daisy carefully covered her tracks as she started to erase the signs of her having been into the security systems. It helped that she didn’t have to erase her presence from everything. Just some of it. “I was right not to tell Tony.” 

“Maybe.” Aunt May squeezed her shoulder. “But then he doesn’t have all the pieces.” 

Daisy looked up at Aunt May. “How am I any different than her?” 

“You’re his daughter.” She said as if it was the simplest thing. 

And wasn’t that just the most frustrating part. Because that never mattered. To anyone.

////

Wanda hadn’t wanted to see anyone. She had made that very clear. As her door opened she spoke. “I asked to be left alone.” 

“Huh, well I suppose that’s an option.” A distinctly unfamiliar, female voice replied. 

She spun, her powers lighting up, ready to lash out. “Who are you?” Wanda’s eyes narrowed as she recognized the woman. “Quake.” 

“Hi.” Quake leaned against the door frame. “So, you wanna break out for an afternoon? Your babysitter is going to be fighting off a virus for a few hours. Don’t worry, he’ll be fine.” 

Her eyes narrowed, but she could pick up enough from this woman’s feelings that she wasn’t lying. “If Vision is hurt.” 

“Headache at most...or whatever the equivalent of a headache is for him.” Quake shrugged, honesty tangible to Wanda in her voice. “So ready to break out? Slushies, pizza, I’ll pay.” 

Wanda’s powers faded, Quake wasn’t a threat; she didn’t look or feel hostile. “I’m where I belong.” 

“Punishing yourself for what happened won’t make it better. I just had that kind of beaten into my head.” Quake stepped further into the room. 

She curled back into her chair. “I killed people.” 

“So do something about it.” Quake crouched in front of her. She ignored the surprise in Wanda’s face. “I know what it feels like to have hurt people you didn’t mean to.” Her head tilted to the side. “What do you need to trust us to help you?” 

Wanda’s eyes lit red. “You would let me in your head?” 

“No.” Quake shook her head. “My powers are triggered by pain and New York doesn’t need an earthquake. That and I’ve had someone in my head before. I’ll kill anyone who tries that again.” 

Her back hit the back of her chair, eyes wide as her powers dissipated again. Wanda could feel the threat there. “I won’t.” But she frowned slightly. “Someone made you hurt people.” And even without being in the other woman’s head she was picking up a surprising amount of emotion.

“People died.” Quake didn’t flinch, but her feelings said something very different.

And Wanda...she nodded and straightened, standing. Quake mirrored her. “What is a slushie?” 

“Disgusting frozen sugar syrup ice.” Quake grinned, her amusement and also sincerity gently brushing against Wanda. “It’s an American classic and a travesty nobody has introduced you to them yet.” 

Wanda wrinkled her nose as she looked at the frozen ‘treat’, she’d just been given. “Why do people drink this?” 

“Sugar.” Spiderman replied while sipping at his own. It was bizarre to see a straw going under his mask. He lifted his fist, which Quake promptly bumped. 

Wanda found this entire thing bizarre. They were on the roof of a crappy apartment complex in what she had been informed was Queens. What Queens or Brooklyn or what have you meant, she didn’t know. But Steve’s feelings said it was important. The roof wasn’t just a normal roof though, it had weird plastic beach chairs and floaties? It was...weird. 

As if to punctuate the thought Quake whacked the back of Spiderman’s head with a pool noodle. “You did tell Darcy right?” 

“She has to pick up the pizza.” Spiderman whined and Wanda was becoming more and more sure he wasn’t a short man but a teenage boy. Also she could feel the affection the two felt for each other and it made her miss her brother. 

Wanda set her...drink to the side. “Why are we waiting for this Darcy?” 

“She’s the one who understands PR.” Quake replied with a shrug. “And whether you want our help or not, we kinda got to stop the Media tearing you apart on the news.” 

Her shoulders curled inwards. It was what she deserved after everything. But seeing what she’d done every time she turned on the news still cut. “I deserve it.” 

“You misjudged your power. You saved the people in the market. If the explosion had happened there it very well could have damaged the building and killed those people anyways. And if he’d gotten away and unleashed the biological agent he was trying to secure millions could have died.” Quake felt...tired. “Collateral damage happens and it’s tragic.” 

Spiderman hopped towards Quake and bumped their shoulders together. “I’ll go check on the pizza.” He then bounced off the roof. 

Wanda took in the other woman. “I deserve their derision.” 

“It doesn’t matter if it’s your fault or not.” Quake pulled off her mask, meeting Wanda’s eyes. “You’re a hero. All the people who sign up for this are, powers or no powers. Anyone who knows and is willing to lose their lives, ther minds, limbs everything to protect and save people is a hero. It costs everything. And sometimes that goes horribly wrong. And it’s going to go horribly wrong again and again. So if you intend to keep standing against monsters then we’ll help you.”

Quake’s face softened as she continued. “But if you need to hide or run or just leave we’ll help you do that too. However that ends up needing to be.” 

“Why?” Wanda was careful not to intrude on Quake’s mind. But she could feel the sincerity and it left Wanda’s throat feeling thick and tight. Because this woman understood pain. She meant what she was saying. 

Quake sighed. “Because it’s the right thing. And I got mind controlled, a man...I…. he died in my place and I left. Ran around the country taking down gangsters, punched someone who I think might be the actual Satan in the face. I wanted to die, because I deserve it. But my team took me back anyway. And my family was still here. This job...takes and takes. So sometimes...I can pay it forward. And from what I can tell you’re alone right now.” 

“And if I don’t want your help?” Wanda asked, curious despite herself. Because she doubted Quake didn’t have an agenda. In fact she could feel a sort of focused energy to the woman, it was hard to read without having ever truly touched her mind though. 

Quake rolled her eyes. “Things will be more difficult, but what do you know about the laws and treaties being proposed right now?” 

“Laws?” Wanda frowned, her head tilting slightly. She’d been hiding in her quarters since Steve had visited. 

Quake sat down on a hot pink beach chair, while picking up an inflatable frog and holding it to herself. “Powers, aliens, Inhumans, science experiments, science so advanced it threatens everything, it’s all happening more and more. People are scared, and scared people do...stupid things.” 

“They intend to control us. Registration?” Wanda knew what happened to those who were different. How could she not with her heritage?

Quake nodded. “Depending on the law. We’re going to stop it.” 

“Holy shit you are depressing as fuck at explaining things.” A new voice came. A slightly out of breath woman stepped out of the door, shutting it behind herself. 

Wanda found herself smiling slightly on reflex at the fond exasperation wafting from the woman. “You must be Darcy?” 

“Yup. And Quake is an idiot.” Darcy bustled over, dumping a worn backpack on the ground. “The problem is the law, both nationally and internationally isn’t set up to handle the big weird world.” 

Quake frowned. “Shouldn’t you and the kid have pizza?” 

“The kid is hiding with the pizza cause he sensed the angst train. Which wise of him.” Darcy pulled a laptop out of her bag. “Nice to meet you Wanda. And honestly there’s not a ton we can do, but someone’s got to do something.” 

Spiderman came swinging up, three pizza boxes balanced on one hand. “Not late!” 

“You’re late.” Quake hopped to her feet nabbing the pizza boxes. She flipped one lid open. “Though I see the delay.” Her lips quirked up. 

Darcy sighed. “Really kid? If you ate my pineapple slices I’m going to be mean next time we do the obstacle course.” 

“I didn’t eat your gross pineapple pieces.” Spiderman sounded disgusted. “I don’t know how you eat that stuff. It’s yucky.” 

Quake offered out pizza to Wanda only to pause. “Do you have any dietary restrictions or like allergies?” 

“Not that I am aware of.” Wanda picked up a piece from the offered box.

Spiderman rolled his mask up over his nose while swiping what had to be his third slice. “So we doing this or what?” 

“Eat your lunch first.” Quake punched him in the shoulder. 

Wanda looked between the three as they ate and felt the bonds. Their affection was warm, not old, but strong. “So what is it that you want to do?” 

“Time for some PR. And see what we can do to help the people who survived Lagos.” Darcy proclaimed. 

Wanda stilled, her voice barely a whisper. “Help?” 

“I have a brand new trust fund. I intend to dump all of it into helping with Sokovia’s reconstruction and humanitarian funds. Diverting six million to Lagos won’t be hard.” Darcy slurped from her slushy. 

She blinked. “That much? But you’re not involved.” 

“I’m Tony Stark’s illegitimate bastard. And Thor’s my lightning bro.” Darcy frowned slightly, ignoring Wanda’s gaping expression. “I know Tony’s fuck ups aren’t my responcibility. And I know even with that I have nothing to do with Lagos. But I don’t have powers like these two idiots.” She jabbed her thumb towards Spiderman and Quake who were essentially inhaling pizza. “But I do have money now apparently, which is it’s own power. ‘Sides, I work backend for them.” 

Quake passed a pizza box to Darcy. “I’ve been bleeding the mobs’ bank accounts dry. AIM and Hydra are as close to poverty stricken as I can make them.” There was a viscous satisfaction to the woman. “We have money, we can use it to help.” 

“Which is why if you want to help and to be helped this is what’s going to happen.” Darcy grinned. “You ask ‘a friend’ for financial support in doing what can be done to help Lagos. The money is put through the Wakandian embassy. You offer to go there and help, but acknowledge that you know they may not want or need that. Instead only that if asked you will help. It’s about acknowledging that your actions had consequences, and you don’t think you are above others.” 

Quake picked up from Darcy. “And then Darcy here has some sort of evil plot involving the kid and I being public for the media...which is..so weird.” 

“We officially made certified legit social media accounts!” Spiderman bounced slightly. “So we can post like you know the normal stuff we do. And like flips and stuff.” 

Darcy smiled fondly at the kid. “And stuff. People need to empathise with you idiots.” 

“I want that.” Wanda looked up, her eyes burned with tears that she refused to shed. “To help the people I hurt. I cannot repay you, but I would do anything to help them.” 

Quake grinned. “The Avengers working with you on your powers?” 

“No? I learning to operate as part of the team. Steve was helping me fit in, work with them. It’s.. my brother is still recovering from Sokovia.” 

Darcy blinked. “Pietro right?” 

“He’s in a safe house, there is a lot of physical therapy. He did not want me there to see him like that but it's been hard without him.” Wanda curled slightly. She missed Pietro like a limb cleaved from her body. Video calls were not the same. Even if she knew he was safe on Clint’s farm, learning to walk and move again.

Quake laid a hand on her shoulder. “He’ll come through, I got shot twice in the gut three years back. It took time but well, I’m doing the whole vigilante thing pretty well.” 

“Thank you.” She wiped quickly at her cheek. It hurt. It had been so close, so desperately close to losing him. 

Quake seemed to understand she didn’t want to talk about it. Instead her eyes lit with humor. “So you’re learning the whole agent thing. How’d you like to work with your powers? I don’t know about you but getting to work with my powers is kinda hard. And knowing what I can do makes them safer to use. 60% less property damage now, and I can basically fly. Which that is so new.” 

“I’d like that.” Wanda dared to smile at the other woman. Her first real smile in days. Because these people were so clearly a type of family. And she could tell they were helping because they were good people. They were kind. 

////

Darcy stepped into Tony’s workshop. “Be a pal and lock down the lab FRIDAY.” 

-Of course Ms Lewis.- FRIDAY’s voice replied, the doors sealing themselves. 

Tony looked up from the holo table he’d been working on. The blueprints he was working on looked like they were for a new type of boot for the suit. “Your sudden but inevitable betrayal is noted FRIDAY. I should have known my Spawn would usurp me some day.” He turned facing her. “Afternoon Spawn.” 

“You look like shit.” Darcy snarked while giving him a pointed up down. “Grapevine says you got into a yelling match with Capsical earlier.” 

He crossed his arms. “Want to tell me why you broke Wanda out? If anyone had found out, if anyone had been hurt. Kid you can’t do that.” 

“She’s a person. You can’t lock her in a room like a naughty toddler and expect it not to blow up in your face.” Darcy wondered if time travel to bitch slap her paternal grandfather in the face for shitty parenting was possible? Cause Tony clearly had the people skills of a feral cat. 

His frown deepened. “Spawn you don’t understand.” 

“I don’t understand?” Darcy scoffed. “You made weapons of mass destruction for years, your entire fortune is built on that. You made Ultron. And now when someone else fucks up you’re ready to lock them up, throw out the key, and punish everyone even slightly like them. You’re being an idiot. And Capsical is too caught up in his hunt for Barnes to listen.” 

Tony blanched, but his jaw also tightened. “We need to be held accountable. The Avengers can’t protect everyone.” 

“No they can’t.” Darcy sighed, god therapy. Her dad needed so much therapy. “But legalizing the persecution of powered individuals and building a new robot army aren’t the answer. Do you even talk to Pepper about this stuff? It’s not all on you.” 

He stiffened and she frowned as he stepped forward. “It’s about protecting people.” 

Darcy groaned. “It’s not all on you. You’re not god, stop trying to be. I may be hot enough to be a demi-god, but I’m too squishy to be divine.” 

Tony snorted, his arms relaxing. “I’m guessing you have a master plan then Spawn? Because I’m not going to back down on this.” 

“You shouldn’t.” She handed him a rag. “Clean up, get some sleep. And maybe consider talking to those fancy lawyers about how to make it so the law applies to powered people and unpowered people equally. Maybe call SHIELD? They’ve been dealing with powered people for decades. I thought you were the adult here.” Darcy dropped a hand onto her cocked hip. 

He ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t trust them.” 

“And you trust the government?” Darcy rolled her eyes. “Make some allies, find some middle ground. Maybe an agreed on procedure for when powered individuals break the law, and a method so international powers can either request aid from the Avengers or refuse to allow you inside their borders. Put in a planet ending exception clause. Maybe start a fund for repairing damage. Baby steps.” 

Tony dropped heavily onto a stool. “How’d you get so smart?” 

“I’m your Spawn. And just fabulous generally.” Darcy flipped her hair. “And BTDubs, Quake and I conspired with FRIDAY. No politics if you haven’t slept first and talked to Pepper.” 

He looked at her and she knew he was weighing his options. Tony Stark was humoring her more than anything right now. He was clearly tired, hungry and drained. And honestly they didn’t know each other that well yet. “I’m not your Doctor Foster.” 

“No you’re not. You just make sentient AIs and support a modern gestapo when you’re sleep deprived instead of unstable wormholes.” Darcy arched a brow. Her goal really was to convince him to get some sleep. Maybe listen to her enough to not go off the rails for a few weeks so Pepper could talk some sense into him. 

Tony finally groaned, his body slumping even more. “I’m repairing FRIDAY when I wake up. And firing Quake.” 

“That’s fine. Just go sleep, and eat something when you wake up.” She held out a fist to be bumped. 

He bumped her fist. “You’re coming to the meeting with my lawyers tomorrow.” 

“Fun. We can find some minimal legislation that can be a solid start.” She paused slightly. “You do know none of you bothered to work with Wanda on her powers? She didn’t have the experience to know she couldn’t lift that explosion high enough.” 

Tony pinched his nose. “Fuck, look kid, I appreciate what you’re doing. I do. But she’s a weapon of mass destruction.” 

“She’s a person first.” Darcy didn’t budge. “Go sleep. You’re not the only one who wants to prevent things like Sokovia from happening again. There’s left over pizza in your fridge for when you wake up.” Her voice was firm. Superhero or not she would drag him from his work shop to his bedroom by the ear if she had to.


	9. Reporter Recruitment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's pumpkin spice season, and I am a basic bitch.

May packed the last of the dishes into the last of the boxes. Resting her hands on her hips she looked around the apartment. It was all packed up, nothing but boxes. There was satisfaction at everything being done. Some melancholy at leaving a place that had been home for the last two years. Shaking it away she turned to where Daisy was picking up another box. “Don’t take more than one box!” 

“Fine.” Daisy grumbled while turning around, only a single box in her hands. 

She sighed, shaking her head. Honestly these kids. May picked up one of the lamps and walked it out into the hallway. “Ned honey be careful, lift with your legs!” 

“Got it Mrs Parker.” Ned chirped, though his voice was tight as he hid how out of breath he was. 

May knew better than calling a teenage boy out on pretending to be tougher than he was. But as the elevator door opened she saw a solution so she didn’t have a teenager passing out from trying to act tough. “Liz, while I’m taking this down could you get some water out and make sure everyone has some before they go for another box?” 

“Sure Ms Parker.” Liz replied, looking a bit relieved not to be carrying more boxes herself. 

May smiled, Peter’s friends were good kids. And moving to the new house was going to take half a day with a small army of teens and the girls. As she carried the unfortunately heavy and unwieldy lamp out to the truck she spotted Darcy marshalling some of the decathlon team. “I’ve got Liz getting some water out for everyone upstairs.” 

“Oh sweet.” Darcy blew a bubble of gum as she took the lamp and started wedging it into the truck. “I was thinking Indian take out for everyone when we get everything to the house? Like don’t get me wrong pizza is nice but I’m getting tired of it.” 

May noticed the very interested looking teenage boys. “Daisy can take one of the kids to go pick it up.” 

“Or I could?” Darcy gave her her best puppy eyes. 

She snorted. “Which one of you has only had her arm out of a cast for a month? You can carry boxes. Nice try.” 

Darcy’s eyes snapped to a teenager who was setting a box into the truck. “You look at the boobs again and I’ll tase you in the balls you twerp.” 

The kid, Flash or something like that physically cringed, his face turning bright red. 

May bit back her amusement. “Well I can see you’ve got things handled.” 

May was exhausted as she looked around the house. It was a cute two story four bedroom. The wainscotting was so nice. She wrapped an arm around Peter’s shoulders, with her other arm she hooked Daisy and yanked her over. “Well, looks like we’re home.” 

“Do we have to finish unpacking tonight? Cause I am so tired.” Peter didn't fight her hold. 

Daisy shuffled, clearly unsure on whether she should eel out of May’s grip or lean into it. “Uh.. it’s very nice.” 

“Come on, we have to at least make up our beds.” May winked at Darcy who was biting her lower lip to keep from cackling. These were her kids and they were good ones. 

////

Darcy yawned as she made her way to the shipping container they’d made their ‘secret’ base at the empty shipping yard. She cringed at how perky Peter was as he sipped from his mug of coffee. “I need you two to kidnap a reporter for me.” She held out a piece of paper with the address written on it. “Her name is Amira Ahmed and is a foreign war correspondent. She’s stateside at the moment, so we need to grab her now.” 

“...why am I kidnapping a reporter?” Daisy asked, only slightly slowing down as she cleaned her tranq rifle. 

Darcy rolled her eyes while grabbing the shitty coffee pot and pouring herself some. “Because someone needs to interview you, she cares about the truth and doesn’t care about the danger reporting the truth could put her in. And I mean more politely ask her to come with you, then blindfold and bring to someplace. I haven’t figured out where yet. And cooperative. You’re a sledgehammer Daisy.” 

“Why can’t we just knock on her door and ask?” Peter looked between the two of them wide eyed. 

Darcy paused. “That is...we could do that too.” 

“Why was kidnapping your first choice?” Peter squeaked. 

Darcy hummed considering that as she drank some of the sweet, sweet caffeine. “Too much time with Tony. He’s got such a god complex.” 

“Do you need us to punch him or something for you?” Daisy offered, she was clearly properly amused now. 

She scoffed at that. “Please no. It’s not even that he’s an asshole. He’s gone and decided the entire weight of the security of the world weighs on his shoulders. So he sees Sokovia as his fuck up, which it was. But then he sees Rogers, Wanda and co in Lagos as proof they’re not any better than him. So obviously they all need to be reigned in since they can’t be trusted. And apparently no one on the team thought to like...talk to him. They all just fight about freedom or consequences.” 

“That’s bullshit.” Daisy paused, shooting Peter a look. “Don’t tell Aunt May I said that.” 

Peter smirked into his mug. “Sure.” 

“I’m watching you.” Daisy elbowed him. 

Darcy dropped a very fat folder on the crate table. “And could one of you drop this off with that reporter Christine Everhart. She’s a shark and letting her loose on General Ross sounds fun.” 

“That would be kinda great actually.” Daisy nodded. “She’s that bitchy one who tried to do an expose on Stark right?” 

Darcy sat down on one of the crates. “Yup, she’s a super bitch. Pretty sure she boinked our dad” 

“Ew.” Peter’s face scrunched up in disgust. He faked retching...or maybe was actually retching. 

Daisy’s nose was scrunched up. “I miss when I just had to worry if my dad had murdered people by tearing them into pieces. It was much simpler. And other than the murder I really liked Cal.” 

“Uh…” Peter patted her shoulder awkwardly. “I’m sorry your murder dad wasn’t your real dad?” 

Darcy silently mouthed a few choice words. She was not touching that with a ten foot pole. Her sister was a bucket of angst triggers. Like holy shit. “So anyways, we’re unleashing Everhart on Ross, and we attempt to befriend inspiration to all little girls and awesome war correspondence Ahmed.” 

“Can I keep doing trick videos? Cause I’m living for the views. I hit a hundred thousand hits on my video of backflips and stuff. Like so many hits. It’s kinda really awesome.” Peter had taken to the whole short videos of various ‘cool shit’. 

Darcy shared an amused look with Daisy. “Yeah you can keep up your videos kid. You’re doing good, though you might be invited to host the X-games.” 

Peter practically vibrated at the thought, a squeak of excitement escaping his lips. 

“So what are you two idiots working on today?” Darcy asked while grabbing her assigned paintball gun. She was getting to be a really good shot. 

Daisy’s eyes lit up with the kind of glee that only came from horrible adrenaline junky ideas that were void of common sense. “Well Peter launching me at those wasps as pretty cool. So I figured, can it work the other way around?” 

“Oh that is really cool.” Peter grinned. “Loser has to wear a princess tiara.” 

Daisy cocked her head to the side. 

Darcy sent a text to Aunt May, they were going to need the first aid kit after this. 

////

Amira Ahmed stared at the three people standing on the other side of her door. It was possibly the most bizarre thing she’d ever seen. In the bright red and blue suit was Spiderman, weird goggle things blinking at her, a...box of donuts in his hands being brandished. Next to him, in full superhero glory was Quake, holding a bottle of sparkling cider? And squished between them was a pretty hipster making jazz hands. 

She shut the door. 

“What the fuck.” 

She opened the door. It hadn’t been a mirage. 

“Can I help you?” Amira finally asked. Maybe someone had slipped her drugs? 

Pretty hipster adjusted her knit cap and held out her hand. “Darcy Lewis. Mind if we come in?” 

“Sure?” Amira stepped to the side, her hands suddenly full of donut box and sparkling cider. Her surprise...guests? Bustled on into her apartment. Spiderman made an ‘ooo’ sound. She cleared her throat. 

Quake’s eyes tracked the apartment noting every entrance, exit and several objects that Amira had never thought of as possible weapons before. Her attention flicked back to her. “Sorry for barging in.” 

“This is a very nice apartment.” Spiderman gave her a thumbs up. “Like so nice. Is that an Ironman bobblehead?” 

Quake whacked his hand before he could touch the Ironman bobblehead. Her smile way too cheery. “So war correspondent? No worries about being kidnapped?” 

“If it’s the only way for the truth to get out.” Amira replied slowly. She set her...gifts? down on the kitchen island. “Why are you all here?” 

Pretty hipster, Darcy apparently, cleared her throat. “Look I have to deal with these two idiots and they have no idea how to handle the press. And talking about the reality enhanced beings face is dangerous. It will put you on the radar of some really powerful and totes scary people. But everyone is so busy being scared of enhanced peeps they’re missing the bit where enhanced beings are incredibly vulnerable to unethical individuals and organizations. I think, and Quake agrees, you’re the sort of person who won’t care about the danger involved in talking about the US government illegally imprisoning, experimenting on and murdering people.” 

“Oh.” Amira’s eyes narrowed as she looked at the three people in her apartment. Because she didn’t know a lot about Spiderman, but he wasn’t Inhuman. Too many abilities, which that implied things. Not to mention anyone with eyes could tell he was young. And Quake? She was visibly young as well, not to mention it was public knowledge she was former SHIELD. “Would it be alright if I record this?” 

Darcy looked like the cat that ate the canary. “Not today, but I can guarantee interviews with both of these dolts. And once you’re in with them, they can get you in with others like them.” 

Amira nodded. “May I take notes then?” 

“Of course.” Darcy sat down in the middle of the couch, Quake and Spiderman bookending her automatically. The three of them squashed in a way that gave away how secure they felt around each other. It was fascinating. 

Amira pulled out her notebook, always in her back pocket, and sat down in the armchair in front of the couch. “I won’t just write what you want me to write.” 

“Of course not.” Quake scoffed. She smiled genuinely for the first time since she’d entered the apartment. “I looked up your work, big fan. I mean I was part of the Rising Tide back before SHIELD black bagged me.” 

Amira’s pencil began to move. “You were Rising Tide? The cyber terror organization?” 

“I was a teenager, and I helped shut down parts of the organization after I signed up with SHIELD. They recruited me for the computer skills, powers came later. But I definitely believe in transparency when possible.” Quake’s voice was sincere. 

Amira could work with that, it was probably the most transparent anyone in or out of SHIELD was ever going to be. “Alright, what are you willing to talk about?” 

“I’m kinda new to this whole thing?” Spiderman volunteered, his voice nearly cracked. “But Quake’s been helping me and I think we make a pretty cool team. I’m just helping out in Queens and Brooklyn right now. And helping the Avengers with Swarm was really cool! But I don’t know much. It was way too easy to get bulletproof fabric for the suits though. Like concerningly easy.” 

Darcy spoke up. “When you record talking to the kid he gets a voice a changer. He’s the only one out of the three of us with a chance in hell at keeping his identity actually private in any meaningful way and we’d like to keep it that way.” 

Spiderman nodded at that. 

“We can do that.” Amira agreed, it was probably the showing of the most common sense since this whole thing had started. And protecting what had to be a teenager from everything was good.

Quake bit at her lower lip. “I can talk about my time at SHIELD up until Hydragate. It’s all on the web if you know where to look anyways. Some about Inhumans, my current arrangement with SHIELD.” 

“Why are you in New York?” Amira prompted. 

She nodded hesitantly. “Yeah, I guess...yeah the manhunt means they had to declassify some things. But I can get you in contact with the world’s foremost expert in Inhuman biology. A couple of Inhumans who worked with SHIELD...I don’t know if they’d be ok with talking to you on the record.” 

“Oh! I bumped into that Daredevil guy last weekend. I could probably give him your number.” Spiderman chimed in, one of his legs was bouncing. 

Amira could see the gold mine of sources and access that was being handed to her on a platter. It was the golden goose and she wasn’t going to be stupid enough to scare them off. Which meant not kid gloves, but a certain level of care when asking them questions. “What do you know about the US government funding for illegal experimentation and or targeting of enhanced beings?” 

“About that.” Darcy set a usb on the coffee table. “Quake has access we can’t explain to you for legal reasons. And let’s say I have an in with Stark’s lawyers.” 

Amira took in Darcy. Everything about her said unthreatening hippy. But… “I need more than that.” 

“I guess I should introduce myself properly. Keep in mind if you want to have access once the news breaks I expect you not be the one breaking the news. But I’m Doctor Darcy Lewis, I work with Doctor Jane Foster. My doctorate is in mechanical engineering, but my undergrad degree is in political science. And the reason these two idiots use me as their backend support is because I'm Tony Stark’s daughter. That and I’m not the raging asshole my dad is.” She slipped her hair over one shoulder, a smug look on her face. A smug look that was shockingly identical to Tony Stark’s. 

Her eyes widened. Well that...if you needed technical support and didn’t want Avenger attention finding Tony Stark’s kid was a good choice. But also...Amira looked at the three kids, and god all of them were kids. She kept her suspicions to herself. Not enough information. The important thing was that Darcy’s identity left open information she couldn’t get any other way. “If the information you give me is verifiable I’ll follow it.” 

“Sounds like a deal.” Darcy held out her hand. 

Amira looked between the three of them. “Then I believe we can work together.” She took the hand. “I can have a camera man I trust here in two hours if you’re willing to start those interviews?” 

“I mean I’m down for that.” Quake shot a look at Spiderman. “You never speak to Spiderman without Darcy or I there.” 

Amira nodded, Spiderman was definitely the youngest. “Alright.” 

“Catch.” Quake tossed her watch. 

Amira looked at the watch and felt herself smiling slightly. This was a panic button if she’d ever seen one. It would seem they were offering her an alliance. “The wind up triggers a gps signal?” 

“Well I think we should let you take a look at that usb drive.” Darcy stood up, hauling Spiderman up with her. “Quake will drop by later.” 

She stood herself. “It’s been interesting meeting you.” 

Amira scrolled through the files on the drive. It was military paperwork from the forties. Legally it shouldn’t be classified anymore. It was detailing the experiments leading up to and then after the success of Steve Rogers. It was nauseating. They’d experimented on African American soldiers without their full consent. It wasn’t safe, it’d killed hundreds. A few partial successes though. 

She dialed her editor, not even waiting for him to finish picking up. “Marcus cancel my arrangements for the story in Nigeria. Send Tiffiany instead. She’s got the grit she just hasn’t had a chance. And I need Ethan with his camera equipment at my apartment in an hour.” 

////

Peter let his copy of The Scarlet Letter drop onto his face. “It’s so boring!” 

“Why can’t we just use sparknotes?” Ned asked from the beanbag chair where he was also trying to muck his way through. 

Peter could hear the whine in his voice, and he didn’t care. “Because Daisy will know, and then she’ll laugh at us. And we can forget going to laser tag this weekend.” 

“But didn’t you say she dropped out?” Ned protested. “Like she’s too cool to care about something this boring. Cool people don’t care about boring books.” 

He dragged the book off of his face and stared at his ceiling. “Aunt May made her promise to not let me slack off from school.” 

“Your Aunt is very scary. I don’t know how I missed that.” Ned solemnly replied. 

Peter felt a slight shiver at the memory of his Aunt shooting targets down at the warehouse. Also she’d gotten really into her self defence and fitness class. “She and Daisy are going to be back from their cooking class in two hours.” 

“I can’t read anymore. I can feel my brain oozing out of my head.” Ned protested. “I think watching paint dry would be more interesting.” 

Peter held up the offending book between his thumb and forefingers and glared at it. “For laser tag.” 

“For laser tag.” Ned repeated with the excitement of a dying man discussing his upcoming execution. 

Peter cackled while shooting twelve year olds in the laser castle. It was awesome. His spider sense tingled and he ducked and rolled. Popping back up he shot Ned straight in the chest. 

“Come on man.” Ned exclaimed, throwing up his arms. 

He sniggered. “All’s fair in love and war man.” 

“Good to know.” A voice came from directly behind him, practically in his ear. And then his whole laser get up flashed at a hit. 

Peter groaned looking over his shoulder. “Really?” 

“I thought you said all was fair in love and war?” Daisy winked at him before moving onwards to continue destroying the hopes and dreams of the twelve year olds having a birthday party at the laser castle. 

Peter blinked as he saw a twelve year old girl in pigtails, braces, and wearing a tiara following behind Daisy like a duckling. She had a viscous look of glee on her face. “You’re teaming up with the enemy?!” 

“Work together to try and hit your sister?” Ned asked. 

Peter’s eyes narrowed. “Deal.” 

They bumped fists. 

Peter watched as the psychotic twelve year old in a tiara cut her cake. That small of children should not be able to cackle that menacingly. “That is a terrifying villain in training over there.” 

“She used her party mates as sacrificial lemmings.” Ned’s voice was filled with awe as he scooped up another chip from their nacho platter. 

Daisy just snickered. “It’s the killer instinct.” 

“You shot me sixteen times!” Peter pointed at his sister’s face. “I will have my revenge.” 

Daisy mimed brushing off her shoulders. “And how many times did you shoot me? Oh yeah, you didn’t.” 

“Your sister is a badass.” Ned looked at Daisy with a sort of hero worship. “You really want to help us build the new Death Star Lego set?” 

Daisy’s eyes lit up. “Duh. Hanging with you two is fun.” 

Peter beamed, his insides feeling all warm and fuzzy. He stuffed his mouth with nachos so he didn’t say anything dumb. But this was good. So good. 

“Are you coming to our first decathlon next week?” Ned asked. 

Daisy reached out and ruffled Peter’s hair. “I wouldn’t miss it.” And the thing was, she meant it, he could tell.


	10. Interviews or Feeding the Vultures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! And keep in mind that just cause Tony thinks something is the situation doesn't mean that's actually the dynamic happening. Cause he's got the social skills of a shiny rock. 
> 
> And on Daisy's age like the show is weird about it. Cause like there's no way she's out of her teens in season 1. Liked kids with shit experience in the foster system like her do not cling to the fairy tale their parents are out there that hard that long. Like just... there is a streak of idealistic naivety in some ways with Daisy. One which is tempered as the show goes on, but she's way too wide eyed and bushytailed for her background to not be a teenager in s1. Also then in s2 she's like 'I'm 25' which bullshit. Then in s7 they're like she's thirty. But that's not possible with the timeline?! Like unless the stuff in space between s5 and s6 took like four years. Because s4-s5 takes place over the course of four months. Then s6-7 is what a month? And I'll give you s3 might have been six months...maybe. If you really squint and then maybe six months between the end of s2 and start of s3. But frankly it's bullshit and they're just trying to make Daisy's age match the actresses which is dumb and doesn't work. So I'm saying Daisy was late 17 in the beginning of s1. Because it makes more sense dang it.

Tony knew his Spawn was plotting. He hadn’t known Darcy long, and honestly had only interacted with her a half dozen or so times. But he knew when a Stark was up to something. It was an expression he saw in the mirror frequently. And it was… he didn’t know how to feel about it. “She’s up to something Pepper.” 

“She’s kept you from signing anything binding or supporting terrible laws.” Pepper replied, her eyes not coming up from her emails. “I like her.” 

He ran a hand through his hair. “I have to do something! Why can’t you see that?” 

“No one is saying you shouldn’t do something. Darcy and I just agree that you need to be careful about what that something is.” Pepper looked up. “You’re just a man Tony.” 

Tony turned sharply. “No! Don’t you get it? If I could have stopped it and people still got hurt then it’s on me.” 

A voice cleared from the doorway. “You need therapy Poprocks.” 

“Spawn.” His jaw tightened, he just...he couldn’t take more people judging and criticizing him when he was trying to protect them. 

Darcy looked at him. “You’re a good guy Poprocks. And I have something you can sign on and support.” She brandished a packet of paper. “It’s basically a resolution and congressional bill for enhanced individuals to be held accountable for their actions. It also has a minor expansion of good samaritan laws and legal requirements for insurance companies to cover damages caused by aliens, enhanced, Nazis, evil scientists, and all things weird and freaky. And it paves the way to building a system of checks and balances for enhanced individuals. Your legal team recommends our first case is once Capsical finds his boyfriend Barnes.” 

“Steve won’t agree to that.” Tony took the resolution that could very easily be turned into national law. But as he skimmed he felt something...unclench. His Spawn wasn’t siding against him, not completely. She was at least listening. “And this isn’t enough.” 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Duh. But good legal code isn’t shoved through in a week. It takes years of careful work. We need legal checks and balances but we need to avoid turning into a police state. Which is why this is a solid start. I mean did you build your suit in one go? Or are you on like the n’th version?” 

“Alright.” Tony read through the legal notes on the probable legal affects. It was something. Not enough, never enough. But it was something. “And Steve? Because he won’t agree to this.” Resentment sharpened his tone. 

Darcy passed a second, and significantly fatter copy, to Pepper. “We stick Quake on him. And I talked to Mrs Gonzalas from legal and she’s pretty certain we can get Barnes off with mandated metal help. So it shows even the Avengers aren’t above the law, and sets a precedence of enhanced being held accountable for their crimes.” 

“Steve won’t listen to compromise.” And didn’t that hurt. That Steve wouldn’t even get off his high horse to listen to him! 

Darcy looked positively feral. “Quake can punch some sense into him. And if he wants one of the best hackers with SHIELD’s full backing to help him, he’ll listen to her. She’s got the time since you fired her. Besides, he’s not totally wrong. If you two would just compromise I could have finished my Spidertasers already.” 

“I’ll sign onto this. Hell I’ll support it. But kid I don’t think that’s going to get through his thick skull.” Tony was going to have to see what else his Spawn was working on. And he refused to accept only the babysteps she was offering. But he’d take the support where he could get it. 

Pepper smiled, stepping over and hugging Darcy. “I knew unleashing you on legal was a good idea. Now why are you here instead of just emailing this to us?” 

“You should turn on the tv in two minutes.” His Spawn had managed to move within touching distance of him and bumped her shoulder against him. “This bill isn’t the only thing I put into motion.” 

Tony looked at the screen. “FRIDAY turn on the news.” 

They watched as the news anchor straightened the papers on his desk. “And now we have Amira Ahemd with Quake and Spiderman.” 

The screen changed to a familiar looking reporter. Tony was mostly positive this was one of the reporters who’d been in the middle east reporting on the Ten Rings. Amira was sitting across from Quake. Spiderman perched on the back of the couch behind her. 

Amira gave that banal reporter smile meant to put a person at ease. “So first of all I think the most popular question for you two is if how long have you been a couple?” 

“Partners.” Quake laughed. “But his face gets real red and adorably cute whenever he sees the Spiderquake tag, so please keep it up. It's hilarious, untrue, but totally makes my day.” 

Amira gave Quake and the slightly shifting Spiderman a look. Which point. But the reporter kept going. “You worked for SHIELD?” 

“I was recruited a year before Hydragate.” Quake answered. “And I didn’t have powers when they recruited me.” 

Amira’s pen touched her notebook of questions. “Why recruit you then?” 

“When I was sixteen I ended up involved with the cyber terrorist organization the Rising Tide.” Her lips pulled up slightly. “This is all available in the data dump. But I’d been following internet chatter about a super soldier experiment in LA. The SHIELD team investigating black bagged me and I got the choice idiot teenagers involved with terrorism get. I could join SHIELD or be prosecuted.” 

Amira hummed. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but this was two weeks before your eighteenth birthday wasn’t it?” 

“It was.” Quake laughed. “I mean I managed to be kidnapped/held hostage four times before I turned eighteen.” 

Amira’s eyes lit. “Let’s talk about that. According to the data dump, and most of the details have been scrubbed, you were put into foster care to hide your Inhuman status?” 

Tony’s knuckles turned white as he listened. Christ, Quake was still just a kid. And damn it all he could see why his Spawn wanted him to see it. Because this was her telling him what would happen if he supported the more useful laws. It would make horror stories like the one being painted by the reporter a reality for anyone who was enhanced. It didn’t change the fact it was necessary. But not everyone would understand that people like them were dangerous.

He mostly blocked out the story being gently pulled out. Most of it still classified, but before her powers Quake had been a loyal agent. And it was painting the fact most of her missions had been protecting the enhanced from the world. Not the other way around. 

“What was your worst injury you received while with SHIELD?” Amira asked, she clearly already knew the answer to that. 

Quake seemed to pause. And then she reached up unzipping the front of her suit. She was wearing a black tank top underneath. Rolling her tank top up a few inches showed what was clearly two gut shots. “I was shot twice. I think I flatlined sixteen times?” 

“This was still when you were eighteen?” Amira prompted. She continued after Quake nodded. “And why were you shot?” 

Quake’s face twitched ever so slightly, she seemingly didn’t notice that Spiderman’s hand was on her shoulder. “As bait to find an alien drug, but also because I’d found the enhanced agent who was being turned into Deathlock against his will.” 

“And despite nearly dying, your heart physically stopping multiple times you stayed with SHIELD after Hydra.” Amira led. 

Quake stilled in a way that screamed silently. “It didn’t change why we did it. Being an agent of SHIELD means something. It still means something to me.” 

“But you left?” Amira challenged. 

Quake brushed some hair behind one ear. “A mission went wrong. And that is classified. But Director Mace and I have an agreement. I’m technically an independent contractor for SHIELD. It sounds kinda bad, but really it’s just they can call me in if they need me. I’m not the only Inhuman with that deal either.” 

“So you support SHIELD?” 

Quake huffed. “Yes. Although chances of me arguing with the director about individual policy is pretty high. Any superior who’s had to work with me can tell you I can be the worst.” Her lips pulled up in amusement. 

Spiderman outright snickered, only to be whacked in the gutt by Quake. 

Tony turned to look at his kid. “You’re framing her as a good person, protector of normies and enhanced alike. And she’s got enough trauma to endear her and other Inhumans to the public.” He snorted. “And give SHIELD more legitimacy so they can be turned into a police force for enhanced. Impressive kid. But what are you going to do when an Inhuman like your friend kills hundreds?” 

“Let the system arrest, prosecute and deal with it. Also encourage Quake to punch them in the face a few times.” Darcy looked at him. “Poprocks no one can prevent all crime.” 

On the screen behind them Quake was saying how New York was Spiderman’s city, not hers. It would be some nice soft balls about the city to close up now. Which, he should have expected his Spawn would be good.

////

Daisy rolled her neck. God she needed to punch something after that interview. She accepted it needed to be done, but she was not a fan. “It wasn’t the whole story.” 

“I can tell.” Wanda replied from where she was leaning against the shipping container. “But it was still true.” 

She smiled tightly over her shoulder. “Well the mind control and being turned into a weapon against my team doesn’t play well in the press. And I doubt they wanted to know about how I was involved with my SO, the psychopathic Hydra agent from hell.” Her teeth clenched. 

Wanda had that look that said she was getting more than Daisy was saying and was curious about that. It was a fairly peculiar expression. “I don’t know. The media would like that I think.” 

“Yeah apparently I'm too damaged to know that Spiderkid’s my soulmate.” Daisy couldn’t help the snigger at that. “There’s fanfic.” 

Wanda’s brow pulled slightly. “What is fanfic?” 

“Oh I’m going to blow your mind with that after this.” Daisy adjusted her gauntlets. “First though let’s work on you containing explosions.” 

Wanda paled, but braced herself seriously and nodded. “Alright.” 

“So I generate vibrations, but they can be used as shock waves. And I need to work on channeling vibrations without my hands. So I’m going to generate vibrations, you’re going to contain me.” Daisy stretched her arm across her chest while walking out into the open. 

Wanda followed. “If I can't, is this area safe?” 

“It’s safe. Like as safe as we’re going to get in the city.” Daisy rolled her other shoulder. “We stuck a half dozen of Darcy’s shock absorbers into the ground so I can’t start a massive earthquake.” 

Wanda seemed to relax, wisps of red flickering around her fingers, her eyes red. “Alright, let’s begin then.” 

Daisy closed her eyes and felt the air around her and it began to shiver. She could feel as Wanda’s energy surrounded and contained the vibrations, reflecting them back into her. 

Her teeth rattled in her head, but she could feel it. The vibrations were a part of her. And she commanded them outward. Forced them faster and faster. Shoving them out, her own vibrations rocking off of themselves harder and harder into themselves. Her entire being was nothing but the power she was commanding. 

And then everything exploded outwards. 

Gasping for air she slumped to the ground. Daisy laughed breathlessly. That was awesome. She hadn’t known she could do that. Rolling onto her back she panted. “Wanda?” 

“Ow.” Wanda’s voice came from further away than it should be. 

Daisy’s head lolled to the side. She blinked as she saw Wanda slumped against the side of a shipping container that had been twenty feet closer last she’d checked. “You hurt?” 

“How powerful are you?” Wanda hissed. 

Daisy lolled her head back to the sky. She reached up touching her nose and pulled her fingers away. Yup, that was a bloody nose. “I don’t actually know. Simmons thinks my powers are growing though. And channeling them too much shatters my bones so…” 

“Are you ok?” Wanda sounded alarmed. 

She considered her body. “Nothing’s broken.” Daisy sat up and climbed to her feet. “That was super trippy. Ready to go again?” 

“You’re not serious?” Wanda asked. 

Daisy wiped the blood off her lip. “Try standing three yards farther back from me this time. You need to know what the distance limit is for you to contain explosions. Once we have that we can have you work on launching me while I’m mimicking an explosion.” 

“That’s…” Wanda looked at the cracked and dented concrete. 

Daisy bounced on her toes. “Come on!” She raised her hands and beckoned Wanda forward. 

“I did not know I could do that.” Daisy laughed, dropping a juice pouch into Wanda’s shaking hands. “You threw me and then the vibrations...super cool.” 

Wanda stared at the juice pouch. “Thank you.” 

“Anytime.” Daisy nudged Wanda’s shoulder. “So the kid should be here soon. Ready for joining me on video?” 

Wanda curled slightly, and then sipped from her juice pouch. “This shouldn’t be public.” 

“It shouldn’t be. But do you think you can find every person and apologize individually?” Daisy sighed. “I don’t like wasting time on public opinion. But Darcy’s not wrong.” 

Wanda nodded, she turned to look at Daisy properly. “She’s not wrong a lot is she?” 

“Well she did suggest we kidnap a journalist. So she’s not always right.” Daisy laughed at the expression on Wanda’s face. Her eyes teared up slightly. “I’m not even kidding. She’s been talking about time travel so she can bitch slap Tony’s dad for fucking him up. The rage is amazing.” 

Wanda sighed, shaking her head. “I like you all, but you are also very confusing.” 

“Well after the video you can help us with the gauntlet.” Daisy adored the obstacle course she’d made for Peter. She ran through it while he was in school sometimes. It was a genuine challenge even before you added in humans with paintball guns and not just trip wires and motion triggered mounted paintball guns. 

Wanda looked at her with far too much suspicion. “The gauntlet?” 

“So the kid is too young for proper field experience right?” Daisy really liked the damn thing. It’d been a lot of work. Incidentally, she did not handle being bored well. And Melinda May’s lessons on securing a location had fun applications. 

“It’s not that half of the shipping yard you warned me not to go into is it?” Wands just...she sounded tired. 

Daisy grinned. “Of course! Can’t have you setting off the traps. It takes an hour to reset everything.” 

“Of course.” Wanda let out a huff, her lips pulling up. “You are a ridiculous person.” 

Daisy hummed, sipping at her own juice pouch. “You’re invited to dinner by the way. Aunt May wants to meet you since you’re training with us now.” 

“Aunt May?” Wanda raised a brow while looking at her. 

Daisy knew that Wanda had some empathic abilities. Keeping secrets from her had been pretty doomed. But it didn't mean telling her everything. Like that she and Darcy lived with the Parkers. At least not right away. “Spiderman’s Aunt. She worries about him.” 

“Ah.” Wanda looked out over the pretty wrecked section of the shipping yard. “What is the plan exactly then?” 

////

Peter landed next to his sister and pulled his mask off. “Hey guys, gals...should I say gals? Or is it sexist to say gals instead of guys?” 

“Either one is fine.” Daisy’s smile was slightly punch drunk and absolutely thrilled looking. 

He looked between the very dusty Daisy who was half slumped against the shipping container she was using as a backrest. Her nose bleeding sluggishly. Then there was Wanda who looked like she’d been wrung out and was equally as dusty. Also they’d clearly gotten into the juice pouches because there were a half dozen empty pouches scattered around them. He slowly looked at the training yard. It was...it looked like multiple bombs had gone off. 

Peter’s voice pitched high. “WHAT HAPPENED?!” He dropped in front of Daisy, his hands on her upper arms. “Are you ok!?” 

“Totes, Wanda can contain an explosion for a distance of 100 meters.” Daisy raised her hand. 

Wanda’s eyebrow raised, but she did high five Daisy. 

He yanked the first aid kit off of his belt and pulled out some gause and dabbed at Daisy’s nose. “I should call Aunt May. Or Darcy? Do you need the hospital?” 

“I’m fine.” Daisy waved off, but she let him inspect her face. “We’ll have to work on redirecting explosions next time.” 

Wanda spoke up. “We are both mostly uninjured. Though I am very bruised.” 

“We have bruise cream?” His fingers twitched. Nothing was pinging his spidersense. But that didn’t mean something couldn’t be wrong. 

Daisy reached out and ruffled his hair. “Kid it’s alright. If I was actually hurt I’d tell you. I promised you and Aunt May no more hiding fractures remember?” 

Peter sighed. “Right, but maybe I should be here next time you two train?” 

“Your sister is the one whose idea it was to be a stand in for a bomb.” Wanda replied dryly. 

Daisy’s head snapped towards Wanda. “You knew?”

“I can feel your bond.” Wanda looked at their surprised faces. “It is...new but the texture is familial, not romantic like everyone thinks. It was the most likely conclusion.” 

Peter rubbed at the back of his head. “Oh wow...uh. If you could not tell Mr Stark though? I’m not sure I’m ready and I don’t think Daisy is to tell him.” 

“Wait…” Wanda’s eyes widened. “You’re all Stark’s kids?” 

Peter shared a looked with Daisy. He held up his hands in surrender. He hadn’t meant to! She rolled her eyes. 

“Stark is a manwhore. And both of our mothers were married when we happened.” Daisy’s eyes narrowed. “It is… complicated.” 

Wanda clearly felt something and then laughed. “Please let me see his face when you tell him. I owe him for locking me in my room.” 

“Deal.” Daisy shook Wanda’s hand. 

Peter sighed in relief. “So...we doing the video thing today? Cause if not I wanted to work on the new goggles with the electronic microweave Darcy requisitioned at SI.” 

“Excuse me?” Daisy’s eyes were bright as she looked at him with mocking outrage. “I see how it is. I can’t compete with a fully stocked lab.” 

He pouted. “Daisy!” 

“Weeks of paintball all for nothing.” She grinned at him. “I see where I rank.” 

Peter groaned. “You’re the worst.” 

Wanda broke out into laughter. She smiled at them before speaking. “Thank you, both of you. But let’s do this shall we?” 

“I got the burner phone.” Peter pulled out his phone for Spidervids only. 

Daisy leveraged herself up to her feet. She held out her hand to Wanda. “Let’s do this then.” 

“What happened is something no apology can make right. I know what it means to be the collateral in some else’s war.”

“If the people of Lagos ever need or want my help I will do whatever I can.” 

“I’ve spoken to the Wakandian embassy with a friend Quake introduced me to. An amount of six million is going to be donated to the reconstruction and aid.” 

“I know it is meaningless, but I am truly sorry. I will ensure I learn more, get better so that something like this doesn’t happen again. Though I know that is a cold comfort.” 

Peter hesitantly stepped towards Wanda. “Do you need a hug? I uh..I’m going to hug you now. So please don’t mind voodoo me.” He winced. But wrapped his arms around the woman all the same. 

She was tense as he patted her back fairly awkwardly. But she didn’t pull away, so win? So he kept hugging her. Because she reminded him of Daisy when she’d first showed up. And Daisy needed all the hugs a person could stand. So that meant Wanda probably did too. 

“Let’s go get milkshakes and ruin our dinner.” Daisy’s hand settled on the middle of Peter’s back. “I think we all need the comfort food.” 

Wanda finally took a step back. “That sounds good.” Her voice was suspiciously thick. 

“Cool.” Peter’s hands dropped back to his sides, fingers twitching slightly. “So uh… maybe make tonight a movie night?” He perked up looking at Wanda excitedly. “Have you seen Mean Girls?” 

Wanda blinked. “I have not?” Her eyes moved to Daisy in question. 

Daisy snorted, throwing an arm over Peter’s shoulders and steering them towards where she’d have parked the car. “Don’t worry, the kid and I’ll get you caught up on movies. Probably chick flicks mostly till your brother is back.” 

“How is he doing?” Peter grabbed the conversational life line. Movies! He could talk about movies! And siblings, he could apparently talk about that now.


	11. Aunt May, Competent Adult

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! Just a heads up Daisy talks about some of her behavior from when she was in LA dealing with Ghost Rider and how she basically had a death wish. So like...I don't think it's triggering, but if it is just go ahead and skip the part where Peter, Daisy and May are talking at the end of the chapter. That said I don't linger or really spend a lot of time on it. And its not graphic or anything so ya'll should be fine. But didn't want to be a dick and just not say anything.

Darcy happily bopped along to her soundtrack dujour as she moonwalked out of the lab. She spared a wave to Jane who was writing manically across the whiteboard. Janey would survive, intervention for food would be required but not for another three or so hours. Whistling she opened the hallway window. Pulling her earbuds out she crossed her arms. “You two ready to follow my lead?” 

Peter and Daisy just looked at her with ‘duh’ expressions on their faces as they climbed in through the window. Well Daisy had a ‘duh’ expression. Peter’s head was under his mask so it was more a general aura of ‘duh’ in his case. 

“Right, to the gym!” Darcy announced and led them down the hall. 

-Ms Lewis, do you require any assistance?- FRIDAY’s voice asked. 

Darcy pretended not to see the excited light in her sister’s eye. “No thanks FRIDAY. Go ahead and put Quake and Spiderkid here as my guests. And tell Tony he might enjoy the video footage from the gym.” 

-Of course Ms Lewis.- FRIDAY agreed like the excellent AI she was. 

She grinned. “Cool, now come amigos! We have a Super Soldier to defeat in public debate.” 

“Think he’ll sign something for me? Cause I have a poster.” Daisy asked, though her stride said she was so here to kick some ass. 

Peter bounced. “I can’t believe we get to meet Captain America!” 

“Sup.” Darcy waived at a very confused looking paralegal on the elevator as they all climbed in. She returned her attention to her siblings. “And sure you can ask him. But can you keep the fangirling till after you’ve punched some common sense into him? Cause Tony’s going to have an aneurysm if he and Steve keep arguing without either of them willing to compromise.” 

“Uh…..” Paralegal trapped in the elevator started. 

Darcy sighed. “You get used to it.” She turned to Daisy. “Didn’t AC want you to get the Captain to sign some trading cards or something?” 

“He’s got the whole set. Very proud.” Daisy shrugged, which only looked slightly weird when she was in the full Quake get up. The face mask was kinda ridiculous but safety first. 

Peter adjusted his right webshooter. “Oh hey did you guys see that interview Amira did with your Inhuman friend?” 

“Yeah, I don’t think America needed to know a redeeming feature of SHIELD was her handler’s butt.” Daisy snorted. “Though at least they’re actually a thing now and not just circling each other and drowning everyone in sexual tension. And Mack’s ass is almost as nice as his arms.” 

Darcy had enjoyed that interview. Elena of super speed may have insisted on a dumb ass mask for an interview. But it had been wonderfully viscous about the risks to Inhumans. Also she could see why her sister liked her team. “I don’t know, some solid biceps and pecs sound like excellent incentives to me.” 

“You both are gross.” Peter groaned. 

He was saved by the elevator doors opening. Darcy put on her game face, it was one all humans in customer service learned, and marched out, her siblings following her like the loyal bookends they were. She walked directly to where a confused looking Steve was standing. 

Steve had a towel hanging around his neck. Standing a couple paces from him was Sam, who was panting, large sweat stains on his workout gear, and general exhaustion as he squinted at Natasha. Which, Natasha was reading something to them off of a Starkpad. As they entered all three sets of eyes looked up. 

“Sup!” Darcy greeted them while marching forward. 

Steve squared himself like he was going to go into battle. But Natasha spoke before he could stick his foot in his mouth. “Ah, I was wondering when you would pay us a visit.” Her lips were raised in amusement. 

Darcy grinned. “You’re totes my favorite Avenger after Thor.” She stuck her hand out to Natasha. “Now how do you feel about negotiation on the topic of legal oversight for the Avengers?”

“You’re the one who’s been using Wanda for views.” Steve’s eyes narrowed as he stepped forward. 

Surprisingly it was Sam who stopped Steve with a low whistle. “Impressive work.” 

“What?” Steve spun on Sam, confusion painted across his face. 

Sam wiped a towel across his face while straightening fully. “Lagos was a shit show. And the kid needed some help and she doesn’t work through angst by punching sand bags like you Cap. Besides, with her brother still at the farm her support network was us, and we’ve been chasing down Hydra.” 

“So that makes it alright to make a spectacle of her?” Steve’s voice had a dangerous edge, but he was listening.

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Wanda got to apologize, make meaningful reparations, and she and Quake are training so that particular situation never happens again. The media is asking questions about at what age people should be allowed in combat no matter how enhanced. There’s debate over whether there would have been more or less casualties if Wanda hadn’t been there. But it’s not just ripping her to shreds anymore.” 

“Well done.” Sam huffed. “How did you get that reporter to start on a cross country survey of Inhumans and all the organizations legal and illegal trying to use them? Cause that’s some impressive reading. I’m guessing you’re responsible for Everhart turning General Ross into public enemy number 1 too?” 

Daisy laughed. “That was me. Well acquiring the intel, Darcy picked who to give it to” She shrugged at the looks. “Intelligence work. Discredit the leaders of enemy action.” 

“It’s certainly working.” Sam looked impressed. 

Natasha tipped her chin up slightly. “Rumor has it you’re responsible for the bill that was just signed into law. Pushed it through while we were dark?” 

“Steve would have tried to stop it.” Darcy was unrepentant. She grinned. “So I brought powered back up cause research says you’re the sort who needs to like, throw some punches before you can have a nice civilized negotiation Capsical.” 

Steve opened and then closed his mouth. Then he snorted. “Alright.” He looked over at Daisy and Peter who looked far more impressive in their hero get ups than in pajamas, so a good choice to wear them. “Do I want to know how Dr Foster’s assistant marshalled you?” 

“She fixed my gauntlets and is the only one that can cook.” Daisy laughed looking far too delighted at the prospect of being punched in the face by Captain America. 

Peter bounced. “It’s a real honor to meet you Mr America Sir.” 

“Huh.” Steve took in the two and then waved them to the sparring mats. Which honestly it was better described as a basketball court sized sparring space, vaulted ceiling included. “Let’s see what you two have.” 

Daisy strode after him. “Kid you go low I go high.” 

Ten minutes later as Captain America went flying into the wall, his legs webbed, Peter was holding his shield while sticking to the ceiling, Darcy just felt proud. Also who actually thought high flying acrobat type Peter would be the one going low while heavy hitter Daisy would go high? It would have been a terrible idea. Which is why it just wasn’t how her siblings fought. 

“You want to put Barnes on trial.” Natasha drawled from besides her. The woman’s eyes were definitely dissecting Peter and Daisy’s fighting. 

Darcy hummed. “One of you all has to face legal consequence, and his case is the clearest cut win. And the biggest indictment of the dangers to enhanced people.” 

“Your reasons for thinking that?” She asked, her voice far too conversational. 

Darcy knew she was being sussed out. “He’s a beloved war hero, has historic importance, was captured by evil mcevil, is white, male, and is super dreamy looking. Sure he’s a scary assassin, but what kid hasn’t played him at recess? For that matter I know I’m not alone in growing up with a Bucky Bear. He’s a beloved American hero captured by evil Nazis and brainwashed by evil Russians only to then be sold back to evil Nazis. The noble hero, taken prisoner and turned against Captain America, his best friend, only to come back in from the cold. It's a damn Hallmark movie.” 

“And if something happens to him while he’s in jail awaiting trial?” Natasha probed. 

She couldn’t help it, she stared at the other woman. “Really? Tony’ll pay bail in exchange for Steve supporting that new UN resolution requiring the Avengers to ask before crossing international borders. And what judge is stupid enough to think a jail would hold someone the Avengers couldn’t? Monitoring anklet and huge bail. I guarantee it.” 

“He will be deemed a flight risk.” Though Natasha’s eyes were crinkled in a way that said she probably approved. And if Darcy thought that then Natasha definitely meant for her to think that. 

Darcy went with it and hoped Natasha was being genuine. “Again, you Avengers have street cred you just don’t use. And rich people don’t play by normal people rules. Barnes will be fine as long as someone does something to his hair so he doesn’t look like a hobo. Maybe make him practice hurt puppy eyes for the jury. If one of you has to be brought up on charges he’s the best option.” 

“You are a very dangerous young woman Doctor Lewis.” Natasha’s lips twitched up. “I see the family resemblance.” And oh she knew the Stark thing. Natasha turned her attention back to where Steve was flying across the sparring floor only to dent the far wall...again. “I believe I should make this slightly more fair.” Her eyes flicked to Darcy for a second. “I’ll make sure he listens to you.” 

Darcy beamed, her cheeks heating in hero worship as the coolest Avenger went to go beat up her siblings. “She’s so cool.” 

“Not gonna argue that.” Sam agreed. 

She looked at the man. “Not going to go join in?” 

“You could not pay me to get involved with that. Quake and Nat are smiling. And I don’t know about Quake but I know that’s a bad sign when Nat does it.” Sam held up his hands in surrender. 

Darcy sniggered, he wasn’t wrong. 

////

May opened the front door of her home and took in the man standing on her doorstep. “You figured it out then?” 

“I’m not used to being an idiot.” Tony Stark replied, the slightly panicked edge to him was worn down by exhaustion and shock. 

She stepped aside. “Well you better come in, I have some leftover meatloaf. Darcy helped make it so I know it’s edible.” 

“Your house is...nice?” Tony said awkwardly as he unabashedly looked around. His eyes lit at the side table with Darcy and Peter’s latest project. He stepped over and picked up the tech, turning it around. “Miniaturized collapsing drone.” 

“For the Spidersuit.” May explained while pulling the meatloaf out of the fridge. “Do you want something to drink?” 

Tony set the drone down. “I’m good.” His nose wrinkled at the sight of the star spangled throw blanket. “So…” 

“They’re good kids.” May set the plate of meatloaf in the microwave before turning to face the man. “Darcy’s turning into their ring leader. Daisy, Daisy is so good and she cares deeply. Peter, he’s still caught up in having siblings and getting to be a hero.” 

Tony twitched slightly. “Why not come to me?” 

“Daisy will have to explain that to you.” May wasn’t even sure of the details, or probably more than the rough sparknotes. But she knew enough. “She had a rough childhood though, and her experience with parents isn’t positive. Don’t push her, she mostly likes you already. Peter would have come to you already, you’re his hero. But he loves his sister and Daisy isn’t ready.”

Tony’s brow furrowed and May found herself realizing that the man was her age. He looked his actual age standing in her living room chewing over the fact he had three kids. “I get why the Spawn is so dedicated to Enhanced rights. At this point I think she has a fleet of reporters on speed dial. Where she finds the time…” 

“I don’t know you well Mr Stark but I’d say she gets it from you.” May wasn’t stroking his ego either. All the kids were bright, passionate, and stubborn as mules when they got their heels dug in. The bath incident when Peter was three came to mind. 

“I don’t know how to be a...dad? I’m already doing everything wrong with the Spawn. But she’s at least an adult, sort of. So’s Quake or..Daisy? But the kid?” Tony’s hands waffled at his side. 

May smiled. “You just be there. And really if you tried to parent any of them they’d destroy you out of spite. Do you think I want Peter swinging around getting shot at?” 

“Is that not appropriate? He seems capable? I just saw a video of him and Quake wiping the floor with Captain America’s face.” Tony genuinely looked confused. 

She set her hands on her hips. “He’s fourteen. He can’t drive, vote, drink, smoke, or even go to some movies without an adult. He’s a child.” 

“That seems slightly unreasona….I mean perfectly reasonable.” Tony winced. “Should I be taking notes? This feels like I should be taking notes.” 

May sighed, god another one. “You’re actually worse than Daisy with feelings aren’t you?” 

“That is entirely possible. My emotional development is inverse to my IQ.” He seemed proud as he said that, horrifyingly. 

May took the meatloaf out of the microwave and shoved it at him. “I’ll get you some milk. And just… when you talk to Daisy just talk AIs. She is very impressed with FRIDAY. It will save you from the inevitable angst spiral.” She felt like laughing, god she was the only adult in the entire damn family. “The Spidersuit is kind of Darcy and Peter’s pet project and if you try to touch that they’ll revolt. But if you work on the automated paintball traps Daisy has been making them help her with, they’ll just fold you into the group.” 

“Paintball traps?” Tony’s face brightened. 

She was going to regret this, or well her laundry machine was going to regret it. “Daisy calls them non-lethal rounds. I think she just thinks it’s funny to shoot her brother with sparkly pink paint. But by the time he turns eighteen no one is going to be able to so much as dream of shooting him.” And May approved of this. Peter could whine about pink stains on his clothing all he wanted so long as he stayed safe and whole. 

“I can do paintball robots.” Tony nodded thoughtfully, his eyes getting that glaze of ‘ideas’ Darcy and Peter got sometimes. 

May poured Tony Stark a glass of milk and then politely manhandled his squawking form into a chair at the table. “You have till five. Today’s Peter’s turn to bring snacks to his academic decathlon practice. So Daisy’s driving him and will be kidnapped by teenagers and probably continue her quest of turning the nerds into the scariest kids in high school. And I know Darcy is getting margaritas with Jane. So you have three hours to ask questions and then I’m kicking you out so the kids don’t catch you.” 

“Is this how you ended up with all three living with you?” Tony looked at her like he was afraid she’d attach a bib to him or something. 

She considered that. “Your daughter was living in a van. Peter’s sister. So I suppose I did just forcefully adopt her. Darcy on the other hand moved herself in to better be able to better command her siblings.” 

“She is kind of terrifying.” Tony agreed. 

May took a seat at the table across from him. “So how did you figure it out?” 

“The kid high fived the Spawn. Then...well spending five minutes around Quake and the kid and it’s clear they’re siblings. I was actually preparing a shovel talk for Quake.” Tony looked baffled at that. “Spawn was just so dedicated to helping Enhanced, and clearly her driving inspiration was Quake and the kid.” 

She bit back her amusement at that. It was ridiculous, but understandable. Because the thing was, besides some lovely bone structure, brown hair, and similar eyes in Peter and Daisy’s case, the kids really didn’t look that much alike. “They all take after their mothers except for Darcy.” 

“I’m getting that.” Tony winced. “Are there anymore? I thought I was careful but...there’s three of them.” 

May shook her head. “Not that pinged on every DNA list Daisy could get her mitts on.” 

“Which is all of them.” Tony gave a slightly proud smirk. “She is good at computers.” 

May felt herself puffing with pride at the compliment towards Daisy’s hacking. It was odd. But this was her life now. She was accepting that her honorary niece was teaching a teenage decathlon team how to kill a man with their pinkies. She had long since accepted illegal hacking as a skill to be proud of. If she could stick a certificate about it on the fridge she would. Actually. “Do Hackers or Agents have awards?” 

“Yes and no?” Tony looked at her cautiously as if he could sense he wasn’t going to like what was coming. 

May took that to mean classified or weird online meme type things. “What about gyms. Do they have certificates and things?” 

Tony blinked at her. 

May’s hands fell onto her hips as she stared at Daisy and Peter. “Why do you have a black eye young lady?” 

“Freedom punched me in the face?” Daisy offered. 

She pinched the bridge of her nose. “The bruising you’re hiding under that hideous flannel you said you threw out last week?”

“The Black Widow kicked my ass?” Daisy looked positively dreamy. 

Peter chirped in. “We totally won against Captain America though!” 

May noted Peter was suspiciously bruise free. She pulled a startled Daisy into a hug. “You did good.” 

Daisy softened as she hugged her back.

May reached out and pulled Peter in. Pulling back she cupped each of their cheeks, looking between them. “Well, I guess you better tell me all about fighting Captain America and Black Widow.” She sighed. “But first you better put some ice on that Daisy.” 

May batted Peter’s hand away from the bread basket. “Not till the casserole is done.” 

“But it smells good!” Peter’s eyes widened into his biggest most begging look. “I finished my homework!” 

May pushed the bowl of peanuts towards him. “You can wait five minutes. And don’t you have flashcards for your competition in DC next week?” 

“Yes…” Peter bit at his lower lip. “But I was thinking, maybe I should quit decathlon? I mean it’d give me two more hours a week to do hero stuff.” 

She picked up the flashcards and set them in his hands. “But you love decathlon, and your friends are in it.” 

“But I could be training more! Or helping. I got three people out of that fire yesterday. That’s more important.” And the way Peter lit up at helping people was so like Ben it took her breath away. 

Daisy spoke up from where she was doing something almost assuredly illegal on her laptop, while sitting in the window. “Kid you’ll burn out. Besides, don’t you want to get a doctorate like Darcy? Work in a fancy lab and everything?” 

“Well yeah, but I can do more as Spiderman. And I’ve got these abilities, if I don’t use them and bad things happen it’s my fault.” Peter’s foot scuffed at the floor. 

“No.” Daisy’s voice was sharp. “Ned knows the heimlich yes? Is he responsible to troll restaurants to use it for choking patrons?” 

Peter huffed. “No.” 

“How many people do you think science inventions save?” Daisy had moved so that she was standing directly in front of Peter now. 

Peter blinked. “Uh...millions. But-”

“No buts.” Daisy held onto his shoulder. “How many people could you help as a scientist?” 

He wilted slightly, though he still had a mullish set to his jaw as he crossed his arms. “A lot.” 

“And how many people will you be able to help if you burn out like I did?” She didn’t flinch at Peter’s eyes snapping to her face. 

May held her breath. She wasn’t entirely sure what to do. Of course grounding her nephew and banning him from being Spiderman till he was older was her first reaction. But it would never stick. Not really. She looked between the two siblings and stayed silent. 

“What? But you didn’t burn out...you’re a hero.” Peter was looking at her, a slight frown on his face now. 

Daisy winced slightly. “I was putting my affairs in order when I found you kid.” She paused, nobody saying anything But Peter was paling, “I wanted to die. When I left I...found the scariest enhanced serial killer I could find and when I couldn’t beat him I told him to do it.” 

“But you said you would come back.” Peter’s voice cracked.

May was rooted to the spot. She’d guessed. But hearing was so much worse than guessing. And Daisy was solid and real. She should have pushed. 

Daisy looked pained. “I didn’t mean to, didn’t think I was, but I lied. It was...this life takes and it takes and I have done things... “ She ran a hand through her hair. “I...my whole life was SHIELD and it wasn’t enough.”

“Bullshit.” May grabbed Daisy’s face between her hands. “You are more than enough.” She waited for the confused nod. Then she turned to Peter. “Now Peter you are going to stay in at least one afterschool club. I don’t care which one but you’re staying in it. You will have friends, go to school, get good grades, go to college, and have as normal of a life as you can while still doing the hero stuff. You will have a sleepover with Ned after the DC trip next week.” 

May turned back to Daisy. “And you are going to get a hobby that isn’t hacking, training your brother, plotting with your sister, or in any way connected to heroing. Learn to knit or something, I don’t care.” 

“Ok?” Daisy rubbed at one arm. “I just...I’m not trying to die anymore? I realized I wanted to come back. It’s what I was trying to say. I burned out but I...had here to come back to.” 

Peter had grabbed onto Daisy’s arm. His face still pale. 

May closed her eyes and breathed out. “Heaven save me from heroes.” She hauled both of her kids into a tight hug. “You both aren’t allowed to die. Ever. New family rule.” 

“K.” Peter mumbled while clinging just as tightly to both of them. 

Daisy nodded against her. “Good rule.” 

They all jumped slightly as the fire alarm went off. 

May grabbed the fire extinguisher and turned to face what should have been dinner. Damn.


	12. Is It A Master Plan?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm almost to chapter thirty on the drafts of this sucker and still don't see the end anywhere in sight....so uh...it got bigger then expected...I was originally going to end this after Daisy left to go do AoS plot but the fam was together. And then do like another six chapters of a short sequel. That was silly. I'm Dumb a Dumb. At this point if I say the words 'oh it'll just be a few chapters, a short fic. Ya'll should just laugh.

Daisy felt...better after last night. Not that she could quite explain it. But she did. She stirred at her cereal. “Does trolling internet trolls count as a hobby?” 

“Huh?” Darcy blinked at her from where she was curled over her coffee. Her hangover lurking around her. 

She poked at her cereal. “Aunt May wants me to get a hobby that isn’t hero stuff or hacking.” 

“Trolling out then.” Darcy rubbed at her eyes and looked at her with groggy eyes. “Bread making?” 

Daisy couldn’t help the face she made. While joining Aunt May for the occasional cooking class was fine, actually cooking was… “No.” 

“I knit? You could try knitting.” Darcy offered out before sipping her coffee as if it was her salvation. 

Daisy considered that and just the thing was… “I’m not good at doing nothing.” 

“Huh.” Darcy didn’t offer anything else, but she looked kinda like death. There had to have been a lot of margaritas drunk between her and Jane last night. 

She tapped her spoon on the edge of her bowl. “Do you think neighborhood basketball counts as a hobby?” 

“Why don’t you just get a civilian job? It’ll get you away from the hero-ing and the fam.” Darcy shot her a glare. “And either eat the food or dump it.” 

Daisy cocked her head to one side. “Fair enough.” She ate her cereal. 

Daisy flipped through the fliers she’d picked up at the local coffee shops. “So do you think I should apply for the job at the rock climbing gym or the extreme obstacle gym?” 

“How can you still move?” Wanda panted from where she was sprawled on top of the shipping container. 

She looked over and laughed. “Your powers are so cool.” 

“I think my bruises have bruises.” Wanda poked at a paint splatter on her stomach. 

Daisy set the fliers to the side. “You’re still in the top three sexiest Avengers.” 

“Top three?” Wanda blinked but looked at her curiously. 

Daisy grinned. “Well you and Natasha, then no list of the hottest Avengers can not have Thor on it. Man’s an alien prince of hotness.” 

“I will take your word for it.” Wanda finally agreed after staring at her for a slow few seconds. 

Daisy decided to give Wanda a break. She had shot her several times. “Your powers are far more defensive than mine. Or have more defensive application. Mine are kind of…” 

“You are getting better at using your vibrations to disintegrate projectiles.” Wanda offered. 

She nodded at that. It was true. “I really should have found more time for training my powers when I was with SHIELD. Being able to do more than just shoot vibrations at stuff would have been super useful.” Daisy mimed her outstretched hand motion. 

Wanda snorted. “Your powers are quite formidable offensively. And from what you’ve said you have come a long way in a very short period of time.” 

“Babysitting the kid is...very low stress and doesn’t take much time.” Daisy shrugged. She didn’t know how to articulate just how busy she’d been as an agent. Looking back it probably wasn’t healthy to sleep, eat, work, and everything all in the same location. Actually video games and surfing the web had been the only things that hadn’t been SHIELD related she had done for four years. And the web surfing had been 90% for SHIELD. 

Wanda’s brow furrowed slightly. “You are projecting quite strongly today.” 

“Lots of feelings were talked about last night.” Daisy had relaxed as she’d gotten used to Wanda picking things up from her. She mostly trusted the other woman. Just...not all the way in her head. 

But Wanda seemed to understand that. “Pietro called last night.” She looked away from Daisy and up at the blue sky above them. “He and Clint are going to come back to the tower next week. I haven’t been separated from him for this long before. It’s...I miss him like a limb that’s been taken from me. But…” 

“You’re afraid he won’t fit the same as before.” Daisy pulled her legs up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. 

Wanda’s accent thickened. “Exactly.” 

“I left my team.” Daisy considered how to put it. Honestly Coulson was so much better at these speeches then her. “They never stopped looking for me. And when I went back it was... that we were family hadn’t changed. If I hadn’t of had here it would have been so easy to just slip back into who I had been with them.” 

Wanda’s voice was soft. “After the bombs it was just Pietro and me. We did everything together, let Hydra experiment on us together. I knew if he was by my side we could even challenge the great Avengers. But then he was shot.” 

“And didn’t want you to see him weak.” Daisy got it. 

Wanda’s head turned, meeting her eyes. “You understand.” 

“Pretty much.” Daisy didn’t flinch away from the way Wanda seemed to see so much more than she said. 

Wanda picked up one of the fliers. “So why are you getting a job at a gym? Your father is Tony Stark. Surely you don’t need the money?” 

“First he doesn’t know that. So no fancy trust fund for me.” Daisy’s head tilted to the side. Well, Tony probably didn’t know and if he did he hadn’t said anything. So same difference. “And second it’s not about the money.” 

“What is it about then? It doesn’t feel like you want it.” Wanda frowned. 

She sighed. “Aunt May wants us all to have lives outside of the hero thing. And I agree with her, but it’s kinda hypocritical of me if I make the kid keep a social life but don’t have one of my own. And I never graduated so it limits the jobs I can do.” 

“Why not go back to school? Or just make the records.” Wanda actually looked confounded on that one. “You made fake schooling records for me last week.” 

Daisy’s lips pulled up. “I gave you equivalent American certification. Which you were really bad at math.” 

“You do know I can give you nightmares, yes?” Wanda whacked at her leg with a limp arm. 

She snickered. “But you won’t because I asked you not to.” 

“I could change my mind.” Wanda looked at the flier again. “What is ‘Ninja Warrior’ training?” 

Daisy nabbed the flier from Wanda and reread that part. “Huh, extreme obstacle gym it is then. And it’s...actually are you doing anything besides worrying about your brother tonight?” 

“No…?” Wanda looked at her cautiously. 

She grinned. “You should come over for dinner then. We can watch some episodes.” 

“Will I at any point be shot at or required to do a push up?” Wanda’s voice was surprisingly pained. 

Daisy laughed outright. “No, popcorn with chocolate however is included in the offer.” 

////

Darcy tightened a final screw before leaning back. “Ok boss lady, try it now!” 

Jane hit the switch. 

The gravitational monitoring array whirred to life. There was a tense moment, but it didn’t spark. 

“It works!” Darcy hugged Jane. She pulled back. “Now lunch!” 

Jane looked at the gravitational array. “But we have to calibrate it now that it’s online. And then hook it into the rest of the system. Which will give us new data and some of the old data can be adjusted-”

“No.” Darcy stayed firm, even if she kinda wanted to do that too. “We are going to eat like normal human beings. We are humans not science gremlins. Or I’m not a science gremlin and I refuse to let you miss meals.” 

“But the readings!” Jane protested. 

She stayed firm. “Ian can handle it.” Darcy saw the continued protest. “I’ll have FRIDAY lock you out of the lab for an hour every day for lunch if I have to.” 

“Your doctorate has made you bossy.” Jane grabbed her flannel and headed for the door though. 

Darcy grinned and trotted after her besty, pushing her glasses back up her nose. “So there’s this etheopian place I was thinking we could check out?” 

“Sure, we haven’t had that since London.” Jane pulled her hair back into a ponytail. 

She hooked their arms together. “Come Janey, excellent food awaits. And we’re one step closer to opening a portal and dragging Thor’s hunky ass back to earth.” 

“Darcy!” Jane’s cheeks flushed. 

She shrugged unrepentantly. “Tis true my sister from another mister. Ooo! I have Stark money now, we should see if we can make you an intergalactic cellphone or something.” 

Darcy blinked as she spotted Tony fiddling with her tools on her desk. “Poprocks, what up?” 

“I hear my Spawn has been very naughty.” Tony leaned against her desk, his face unbearably smug. 

She pushed her glasses up. “I live to break the rules. Though I was under the impression that that was a genetic trait.” 

“I was considering giving Quake the shovel talk.” His eyes glinted. “Or maybe the missile talk. But then it dawned on me. I have sneaky, lying spawn.” 

Darcy snorted. “I would have paid to see you give her the shovel talk. Like so much money. All the money.” 

“You spent all your money.” Tony’s lips twitched. 

She pulled her new screwdriver out of his fidgety hands. “At least you can now say your Spawn got to punch Captain American in his perfect teeth? I’m guessing it was the united front in the gym that gave it away?” 

“I’m insulted it took that long for me to put it together.” He picked up a pair of pliers and pointed them at her nose. “I accept this only because it was my spawn pulling one over me.” 

Darcy grinned. “This a good time to mention we’ve been funneling .2% of your personal wealth into funding the foster system?” 

“Is this when parents ground their children? Very well. You are grounded, no more of the good coffee for you. You must suffer the sludge they drink in the labs.” His mouth pulled up into an amused expression. “Only .2%?” 

She shrugged. “Well technically we’re funneling a full 1.6% of the Stark personal fortune to various charities around the world. Totes my idea by the by. Call it unpaid alimony our mums never got. Ignore or be added to the taser list.” 

“The taser list?” Tony lit up. “I just realized my spawn have downed Thor and Steve!” 

Darcy patted him on the shoulder. “Without fancy robot suits even.” 

“As expected of my progeny.” He held out a Starkpad. “If you hire a PR team for the Avengers will you please stop doing whatever it is you’ve been doing to the media. Two generals resigning in shame, one of them being brought up on charges is more than enough chaos for a while.” 

She nabbed the Starkpad and held it to her chest. “Thank Thor. How you didn’t already have an Avenger PR team I don’t know. But I’ll have a list for you by the end of the day.” 

“You are eerily like Pepper sometimes.” Tony cleared his throat and held out a box. 

Darcy set the Starkpad aside and accepted the box. She looked inside and then back up at him. Because it was very clearly a high tech eye mask. “Hate to disappoint but my superpowers involve toasting pop tarts, forcing scientists to eat, making Jane's creations work with 30% less ‘boom’, and knitting.” 

“You’ve got more powers than that.” He looked smug. “But no, for Daisy. Aunt Parker said the Kid’s suit was like a project of yours. Gotta keep the progeny alive, so improvement. Not that improving a fabric face mask is difficult.” 

Darcy picked up the mask. It was gorgeously crafted, didn’t even look electronic to the untrained eye. But her eye was trained and that was definitely a tricked out mask. Probably infrared vision, definitely a built in comm system. She grinned. “What are you doing the rest of the day Poprocks?” 

“Hyperventilating in the bathroom because I apparently have three spawn to traumatize, then scotch inspired robot building.” Tony’s voice held enough sarcasm to drown the city. Unfortunately for him Darcy could spot that was probably far closer to the truth then he was implying. 

She set the box down and patted his shoulder. “Your awkward is actually painful to me. Come, we can make new gauntlets for Daisy. We couldn’t afford the stuff to do more than fix up her old ones before.” 

////

Peter yanked his mask off as he came shooting in through the open side window. “Daisy! The craziest thing just happened to me! These guys were robbing an ATM with these high tech weapons, and they were wearing Avenger masks which is just ironic you know? But I had it and then this one guy used one of the weapons and it like cut the bank front off. So I had to go and save Mr Delmar and his cat. Which they got away. But those weapons were too high tech for just regular robbers to have.” 

“What type of weapons?” Daisy was up and around the table eyeing him for injuries. 

He waved his hands. “One of them was like gravity manipulating? I couldn’t really move? It felt very weird.” 

“Which bank was this at?” Daisy grabbed her laptop. “We should be able to find the surveillance footage.”

“O’ Queens.” He frowned. “How do jerks like that get weapons like that?” 

Daisy frowned as she typed. “No where good. Darcy will have to look at the footage to tell us exactly what they do. But we can start tracking them down from here.” 

“I’ll make some hot chocolate then.” Aunt May squeezed Daisy’s shoulder. “And you young man go get out of your suit. No suits in the house.” 

Peter flushed, but zipped up the stairs. This was big! His first big investigation!

Peter sipped at his second mug of hot chocolate. “So the bank was the third robbery in Queens using high tech weapons?” 

“Surprisingly high tech.” Daisy agreed. “Someone is definitely selling new weapons and they need to be off the street.” 

Aunt May set down a bowl of popcorn. “Is this one for the police?” 

“No, they don’t have that kind of firepower and too small time for the Avengers.” Daisy leaned back in her seat. “I can set up an alert for the kid and I. Which if you get the alert, you wait for me before you engage ok?” 

Peter’s eyes lit up. “But I get to engage?” 

“Yeah you can engage.” Daisy flicked his ear. “Not till I get there though. But you did good with the wasp things.” 

////

Tony waived the holographic display up. “What about a vibranium based alloy?” 

“Even with the vibranium at that thin her quakes could damage it.” His spawn contradicted. “You need twice the thickness so we have a hexagonal build to distribute the force. I’ve recorded her vibrations at the strength of 6.5.” 

He whistled, that amount of force, localized and controlled the damage that could do. “Is her power output stable?” 

“I’m not sure. It’s not like she can use her powers to their full extent without shattering her bones.” Darcy reached out magnifying the nanobot build and changing the wiring. “Look, we can change the inter-connectivity. Instead of all of them connecting to a central program we make it a swarm. Each one acting independently but in communication with the others.” 

Tony swiped to a digital version of the process. “What if we add .3 millimeters to the base we could connect the control mechanism to the mask.” 

“And the mask gives audio control.” Darcy’s eyes lit up as she rotated the gauntlets. “Expand the base by 2.5 millimeters and we have room to add in more than just protection.” 

He added in the new values, and that was room to add all sorts of special bits. “How do you feel about built in tasers?” 

“Only if we included dendrotoxin darts.” Darcy grinned pulling up the blue prints from one of his old projects on non-lethal darts.

Tony raised his hand for a fist bump. “Not bad Spawn.” 

“Well I am your kid Poprocks.” She bumped his fist. 

Tony leaned back. “Start synthesizing FRIDAY.” He poured two tumblrs of scotch and held one out to his Spawn. “I like celebrating a job well done.” 

“Really not a scotch gal, got any vodka?” Darcy opened up his drink cupboard and made a sound of success while grabbing the worst vodka in there and pulling it out. “And I know you have weird rich people juice.” 

He scoffed as he watched her rooting around in his minifridge. “You definitely don’t get your taste from me. I didn’t even know I had that.” 

“Well that’s unfortunate, vodka is where it’s at bitch.” She gave a wiggle as she yanked out his kiwi smoothie and then proceeded to dump an...impressive amount of vodka into it. 

Tony felt rather smug while dumping one tumblr into the other and then downing it all. “So I know I’m not great dad material. But want to explain why your very sizable trust fund is gone? Like you blew through millions in weeks.” 

“Changing the world’s expensive Poprocks.” Darcy raised her vodka smoothie towards him and took a truly impressive gulp of it. “Sides my prototype got bought up last week. I’ll make it back, I got a few of your brains.” 

He gaped. “I didn’t just hear that. What did you give it to saving puppies or something?” 

“The Wakandan Embassy for reparations and rebuilding in Lagos and every legit Sokovian charity I could find.” Darcy cocked a brow in challenge. 

Tony poured himself another drink. “So what’s you and the others’ endgame? You’ve all got the Stark ambition. And I know you’re plotting together. I talked to May Parker, nice lady, mediocre cook, clearly adores you all. But she’s not the mastermind type.” 

“She’s getting to be a pretty good shot.” Darcy smirked. “And I know Daisy showed her how to put a smug asshole into a world of pain.” She leaned against a table. “But fine we’ve got an evil plot. It’s called Inhumans are people too, the Avengers don’t have an official PR team till tomorrow morning, and Hydra is an evil fungus.” 

He huffed. “Save the world then. A herd of baby Starks would decide to do that.” 

“You think we can’t?” Darcy challenged. “None of us are as smart as you generally. But I’m pretty sure I’ll be out building you in a few years. Peter made web fluid under the desk in chemistry class, and Daisy, well Daisy is one of the best hackers in the world and her powers are probably growing. I figure we stand a pretty good shot.” 

Tony poured himself another drink. “I’ll bite. What am I doing in this master plan of yours?” 

“Not trying to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. I mean you don't even have the second best shoulders for world carrying on the team.” Darcy stepped forward and patted his cheek. “It’s cool, we got you Poprocks. Though the kid’s a hugger so you're going to have to get used to that.” 

He twitched. “I don’t do hugs.” 

“You do now Poprocks.” Darcy snickered. “Oh and secret tip, Daisy could use a weird uncle figure. She’ll punch you so hard you won’t be able to drink without a straw if you try the whole dad schtick on her.” 

Tony blinked. “Well that’s frightening, and not enlightening at all.” 

“She’s got PTSD up the ass like you do.” Darcy threw back the rest of the vodka smoothie. “So how do you feel about a tricked out taser for your oldest spawn? Cause I could use a new taser. McTaser has reached the end of his natural life span. So many frat boys, only so many charges.” She sniffed theatrically. 

And yep, he was so much more comfortable with that. “What type of tricked out are you thinking for McTaser II?” 

“Well, concealment is important since tasers are totes not legal here in the Big Apple.” She made finger guns at him. “So, how do you feel about nanobots? Like you got the mechanic candy store here. Let’s make the coolest taser in the world Poprocks. One that looks like a fancy bangle or something when not turning assholes to slobbering wrecks so I don’t get fined?” 

Tony turned to the holotable. “You heard the Spawn, bring up some specs FRIDAY.” 

“You know I appreciate the thought on the kill setting, but maybe we should call it something else? Like kill setting not very PC.” Darcy looked up from their new schematics. 

Tony nodded thoughtfully. “We can call it Supersoldier setting.” His Spawn was going to send anyone who messed with her straight to hell.


	13. Delicate Machinery Does Not Like Vibrations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Winter is so here. It's super cold, sadly the dog still thinks the balcony door should just be open all day for her. She has been roving pair of sad puppy eyes since the temperature started dropping.

Peter yelped as he dodged another advanced gun blast, but it did send him tumbling straight through a white picket fence and into some poor person’s yard. “I should have stayed at the party!” 

-”Probably should have, Quakes going to kick your ass for engaging without her.”- Darcy’s voice was irritatingly dry. 

He face planted into a shed. “Why the suburbs, shady deals aren’t supposed to be in the suburbs.” Peter flung himself onto a roof and then took off after the van. “They’re not getting away this time!” 

-”Huh huh, well you’re headed towards the beacon. And more crime happens in the suburbs then people think.”- Darcy snickered. -“Did you just bust that man’s shed?”-

Peter huffed as he ran, side note, being able to swing was made difficult by having nothing to swing from! “It came from nowhere!” 

-”Yes, sheds like the one you just demolished, famous for their acrobatics and sensing of danger.”- Darcy drawled. 

He used a tree to send himself flinging over the next house. “Shingles are slippery.” Peter barely managed to twist mid air to miss some hanging lights. Then he came flying onto the roof of a three story house and grinned. “I see the van. Just gotta slow it down.” 

-”Wait for Quake, she’s almost to you.”- Darcy’s voice lost it’s teasing quality. 

Peter took a flying leap. People could die if he didn’t get to the van. He was trained for this! “I got this!” His voice pitched up as he came flying for the bad guys. “SURPRISE!” 

He was midway through an epic arch towards the weapons van when his instincts screamed. Twisting in air he brought his web shooters to like...do something. He was only half way twisted when he was slammed into by metal. 

“WHAT!?” He grabbed onto the claw...thing that was cutting into his legs as they rocketed up. Peter’s heart was in his throat as he realized a big metal bird thing had him. “Spooky eyes!” They were all green and glowy and his spider sense or whatever was blaring at him. They just kept going up, horrifyingly up. And then a cold shiver ran down his spine unlike anything he’d ever felt. 

A black figure shot up above the bird and “Quake!” Peter finally realized what the black shape was. And then Quake landed on the back of the bird. 

A wave of power that rattled him to the bone crashed past him. The metal bird cracked, sections blowing, some actually disintegrating, the creature/person crying out in pain. But the clawed foot released Peter. 

He shot his web hooking Daisy. A yank of his arm and he went flying up past exploding metal and creepy bird person and he hooked himself onto Daisy’s back. “Evil Bird!” 

And then they were hurtling back towards the ground. Daisy’s arms were towards the ground, her vibrations slowing their descent. His teeth chattered in his head from the power. 

Glowy green eyed bird robot/man went spiraling down, one whole wing exploding sending it crashing into the ground in a fiery heap. 

As they landed Daisy shot her arm out at the van that had pulled over sending it rolling onto its side in one of the yards. And then they hit the road with a jolt, Daisy’s powers cutting off. 

Peter gingerly hopped off of her back. He looked around the destruction of the small section of suburb. Lights were lighting up every house on the block, robot bird thing was on fire, henchmen were crawling out of the upturned van… oh he was so dead. There was even a teenage girl filming the whole thing from her bedroom window. “Uh...funny meeting you here?” 

“Go web the men in the van.” Daisy ordered, her voice hard. 

He winced, but jumped to the van and promptly webbed the hands and feet of the two men and hauled them out. “Crime doesn’t pay you know.” Peter set them so they were sitting on the grass. Jumping onto the van he reached in and turned off the ignition and pulled the keys out. 

There was an awful sound of tearing metal and a burst of vibrations. 

Peter turned and winced as he saw Daisy dragging the person who’d been in the robobird suit out of the wreckage. She dropped his still smoking body onto the grass. 

He tapped his comm. “I think we need an ambulance.” Peter was so not getting back to that party… Ned was going to kill him. 

Daisy strode straight for him and hauled him into a vice like hug. He squawked in surprise before hugging her back. That had been terrifying. 

Peter held onto Daisy’s hand as they sat side by side on the lawn. Police detective Yuriko Watanabe had pointed them towards the lawn. She was on the list Darcy and Daisy had made of acceptable police to corporate with. It was a short list. The news crews were there, evil bird dude was in the back of an ambulance, the two henchmen were in the back of a police cruiser. Multiple suburban people in bathrobes were being interviewed by police. 

“So uh robo bird people. Who knew?” His goggles blinked as he looked at Daisy hopefully. 

Daisy sighed. “I can’t even be mad. Going in alone without back up against common sense was like...my move at SHIELD.” 

“Cool, not getting grounded?” He checked, his shoulders relaxing. 

She looked at him, her new fancy mask actually moving with her face as she stared at him in disbelief. “Oh you’re so grounded.” 

“That’s fair.” Peter admitted, the robot bird had been...it’d been scary. He maybe should have probably waited for back up. “You’re still coming to Decathlon though right?” 

She squeezed his hand and laid her head on his shoulder. “Wouldn’t miss it.” 

////

Darcy stared at the morning news and felt tears of mirth gathering in her eyes. This was the best thing ever. “FRIDAY, print just...all of these articles. I’m making a scrapbook.” 

“What’s got you in a state?” Jane asked from her fevered calculations.

She snorted, a slight whistling sound like a dying whale escaped her. Because there were pictures, so many amazing pictures splashed everywhere. “The best media day for enhanced individuals just happened.” 

“Huh?” Jane looked up, face slightly crinkled. 

Darcy couldn’t even articulate her joy without chortling. She waved Jane over. 

Jane got the message and walked over, actually left the science, it was a miracle. She looked down and stilled. “But aren’t-” 

“Yes.” Darcy gasped. 

“And wait but…” Jane’s eyes widened. 

Darcy lost it, she was crying, she was laughing so hard. She wheezed out a reply between bellows of laughter. “Yes!” 

“Well that’s….something.” Jane trailed off before starting to giggle.

Because there, being cooed over by the whole world, were photos of Spiderman and Quake landing on a street, Peter clearly hanging onto Daisy. And then there were photos of them hugging each other desperately. It looked intimate as hell. But oh the coup de grace was a photo of them sitting next to each other on some poor idiots front lawn. They were clearly holding hands in it, Daisy’s head on Peter’s shoulder. The internet was losing its mind. 

Darcy knew that this was a public relations coup. Quake and Spiderman stopping illegal alien weapon running in the suburbs? Nothing scared important people like giant menacing, demonic looking robot bird people with super weapons in the goddamn suburbs. Only damage was some minor grass being torn up, a few hours of road repair, and a demolished shed. All of which ‘Spiderquake’ had already promised to fix. Short of saving puppies while holding a baby, with god bless america in the background, there was no better PR. It was a miracle. But Darcy couldn’t stop wheezing. 

“They’re idiots.” She gasped out. 

Jane opened her mouth but more giggles came out instead of words. 

An hour later, Darcy kept snorting anytime she thought of it. “Think I should make them ‘congrats on your true love’ cake?” 

“I think it’s very impressive you know Quake and Spiderman.” Ian put in from where he was rewriting Jane's notes, only legible. 

She winced at his smile. Normally she wouldn’t encourage him. Dating the intern was so London, and his breath had smelled like socks. But, well it was a wonderful day. “It is cool isn’t it. I think I should get them a cake. There has to be some fancy caterer in the tower who’d make a themed one.” 

-”Mr Stark has two chefs on call in the tower as well as six in the cafeteria.”- FRIDAY helpfully informed them. 

Darcy beamed. “Thanks FRIDAY. Can you put in order for a romantic congratulations cake for Spiderquake? Tell whichever chef has time for it to have fun with it.” 

-”Very well Dr Lewis. Do you require anything else?”- FRIDAY asked. 

She shot the nearest camera a thumbs up. “I’m good FRIDAY.” Darcy pulled up her favorite dance mix and blasted the lab. 

Darcy pulled up work with the holotable. She was going to use the nanobots to make Janes teleporting tech mobile, portable, and not a bumpy van ride from sending someone to a bilgesnipe den or something. Holo tables were so cool. No more reams of graph paper and exploding prototypes. She could do 90% of the work on the table and only synthesis one or two prototypes. It was an excellent day. 

Darcy felt bleary eyed from staring at holographic numbers. It took her a second of blinking to bring the person who’d just interrupted her into focus. “Jackbooted thug lady?” 

“It’s Maria or Hill.” The perfectly pressed woman replied. “I’m head of security here at SI.” 

Darcy whistled. “Those cheekbones can cut glass can’t they? I mean damn if the ladies did it for me, I would be all over you.” 

Hill’s eyes twinkled, but her face stayed even. Killer poker face that one. “I was advised I should look into your security considering your parentage.” 

“Naw I’m good, Soldier Hotstuff.” Darcy flicked her wrist just right, her new bangle turning into the most tricked out taser on the planet. “Dudebros everywhere should fear me.” 

Hill’s lips twitched upward. “How do you feel about coffee and discussing the legal mess we’re all in the middle of then?” 

“Fine, I’m guessing my being a Stark isn’t going to stay quite much longer anyways.” Darcy turned off her holotable. She carefully set the biolocks. No stupid hazing the newbie crap was fucking with her designs. Not that SI seemed the place with worse hazing then maybe putting salt in your coffee if you had an office jokester in your cubicle area. Better safe than sorry though.

Darcy picked up her knit hat, pulled it down to her ears and then grinned at Hill. “Ready when you are Sir Hotstuff.” 

“Changing up nicknames already?” Hill asked while leading them to the elevator. 

She shrugged. “I mean I don’t think either of them are the perfect name for you. But you can tell a lot about a person if they just roll with the punches ya know? LIke Agent iPod Thief. He was just a badass.” 

“If you weren’t working in the labs I’d offer you a job in security.” Hill did look properly amused now. “Is this how you got some of the most stubborn people on the planet to compromise for five minutes?” 

Darcy snorted. “As if. Naw it’s like this. Capsical and Poprocks should never be sat down at a table and left to ‘compromise’. They’ll dig their obstinate heels in even if they agree. You have to negotiate the least objectionable solution with each of them separately.”

“Interesting approach. Is this a ‘Stark doesn’t play well with others’ conclusion?” Hill was part curious, and partly testing her. It was kinda flattering and insulting at the same time. 

Darcy rolled her eyes as they stepped out of the elevator and moved towards the Security office lounge. They had the good coffee up here. “Look, it's like bullfighting. Steve is a bull only instead of horns he’s got the Shield. I mean I’m pretty sure the man would charge straight into a brick wall if he thought it was the ‘right’ thing to do.” 

“You’re not wrong.” Hill agreed while pouring them coffee and gesturing the creamer and sugars. 

She nodded, finally someone other than Daisy who got it. “Right? See and Tony’s a matador. Complete with sparkly outfit, charm and using weapons to bring down things more powerful than himself. But see the thing is you’re asking a bull and a matador to sit down and agree on the rules of bullfighting. It’s not gonna happen.” 

Hill actually grinned at that as she brought her coffee to her mouth. “So you separated them and got their handlers to do the compromising for them. Effective approach. I wish I’d thought of it.” 

“They look like adults so everyone assumes they’ll act like them.” Darcy dumped four creamers and two sugars into her coffee. “Besides, Capsical is jaded and hates ‘The Man’ with every fiber of his justice filled being. And Poprocks is a lot of things, but he’s very much a part of the whole ‘The Man’ thing. Steve is never going to trust Tony completely after Ultron. And Tony is incapable of the basic empathy or of understanding what his bullshit is going to do to normal people. He plays by rich person rules, he doesn’t get that’s not how the world works for literally everyone else.” 

Hill seemed to consider her words, her eyes sharp though she still felt friendly. “You’re not wrong, in fact that’s partially why we have tried to keep Steven in DC and Stark in Malibu as much as possible.” 

“Huh...that makes so much sense.” Darcy reevaluated the woman. This was an ally! 

Hill hummed. “How would you like to look at some of the policy we’ve been trying to get Stark to agree to since apparently he listens to you?” 

“I won’t put anything in front of him I don’t think is a good idea.” Darcy wasn’t going to back down on that point. 

Hill nodded with ease, which was kinda impressive how she did it, while looking formalish. “I wouldn’t expect anything else. But enough of Stark, what type of security do you already have in place?”

“Well legally, and according to internal SI paperwork I live on Thor Floor. And if I get caught out in Queens it’s because Daisy Johnson was a foster kid my parents took care of for a year when I was in middle school. It’s only natural we’re catching up now that we live in the same city.” Darcy loved her sister’s hacking skills. They’d laid the correct paper trail to make their connection completely legit looking. And it’d protect the Parkers. 

Hill sounded amused. “I assume all the paperwork and records are 100% legal and legitimate.” 

“Of course.” Darcy winked, even if she wasn’t that good at it and it probably looked kinda dumb. 

Hill huffed softly. “Well then. You do realize you’ll have to accept a bodyguard once the news hits?” 

“It’s going to suck monkey balls.” Darcy grumbled before draining her coffee in one go. Sue her, she wasn’t recovered from collegiate bad habits yet.

Hill refilled her mug. “I have a few options I think you’ll find less objectionable. In fact, how would you feel about two of your friend Daisy’s old coworkers? SI has been considering offering them employment.” 

“If Daisy vouches for them.” She cocked her head to the side. “I thought you said ‘a’ bodyguard?” 

Hill opened her mouth and then her pager, phone, and half a dozen alarms around the office went off. She grabbed her phone and hissed. “Shit.” 

“Which alarm is that?” Darcy asked. 

Hill looked at her. “The one that means that the lead Daisy found for Steven just paid off.” 

“Huh, so the brainwashed russian murderbot alarm. Good to know.” Darcy took a liberal gulp of her coffee. “You’re going to need me to head off Tony aren’t you?”

////

Wanda watched as Daisy taught a small herd of tiny children how to safely summersault. They looked like a bunch of awkward pillbugs, rolling around the mats. She bit back a smile. It was kind of adorable. She looked at the gym employee in an identical blue polo to the one Daisy was wearing. “I thought this was an extreme obstacle gym not…” She looked pointedly at the adorable group Daisy was leading. 

The guy in the polo laughed. “We have classes for every level of skill. That’s our beginners tumbling class for kids.” He held out his hand. “I’m Drew.” 

“Wanda.” She accepted his hand, a trickle of her powers brushing against his mind. He was harmless, very bored, and curious about his new coworker. Ah, he wanted something new to gossip about. She pulled back her small trickle of power. “I had expected more...rock climbing with paintball guns honestly.” 

Drew laughed outright. He spoke while wiping a tear from his eye. “Oh that’s a good one. No, nothing like that. Paintball.” He shook his head. “No we run classes for all ages, but they focus on gymnastics, martial arts, parkour, and rock climbing. I’m the current rock climbing instructor actually. I mean the groups are usually after school groups. But Daisy is teaching the classes that are less focused.” 

“Like tumbling?” She asked. 

He nodded. “Hm. She’s got the weirdest mix of masteries. But the only class she’s running in your age range is Tai Chi, though that’s more geared towards older patrons.” Drew looked at her in open curiosity. “Are you a friend of hers?” 

“Yes we...play paintball quite often.” Wanda’s eye twitched slightly. If paintball, combat, and constant explosions at the same time could be considered ‘play’. Though she was pretty sure that to Daisy it did. 

Drew snorted, a sort of understanding in his eye. “I’m guessing that’s why the guess at paintball rock climbing of all things.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “Well if you’re not here to sign up for a class or anything you’re welcome to watch while you wait for your friend.” 

“Thank you.” Wanda smiled at Drew. He was...so horribly normal it was actually slightly soothing. 

Wanda straightened an hour later as Daisy loped towards her. And she could feel and see, just the happiness radiating out from the woman. “Hello.” 

“I see Drew showed you where the sports drinks are.” Daisy laughed. “What’s up?” 

Wanda easily followed the clear invitation from Daisy. “I needed to get out of the tower and I thought you wouldn’t mind?” 

“Of course not.” Daisy dropped a hand on her shoulder, her eyes kind. “We’re friends, you’re always welcome to drop by.” She seemed to consider something. “Do you need to crash at Aunt May’s for the night?” 

Wanda loved being at the Parker home. It was full of light, affection, warmth. Though she hadn’t spent a great deal of time there, it still felt like a home she’d been welcomed into. Perhaps not her home, but a home nonetheless. “I would like that.” 

“Cool, the couch is super comfy.” Daisy led them into a locker room. “I’m guessing the emotions are running pretty high with Barnes newly in the Tower.” 

Wanda sighed. “There is that. But also...well I’m not the most dangerous person requiring Vision’s supervision now. The apartment was...quiet.” 

“And Pietro doesn’t return till next week.” Daisy finished for her while pulling her shirt off in an easy move, completely mindless that Wanda was right there. 

Wanda’s eyes snapped up to the ceiling. “Yes.” 

Daisy laughed lightly. There was a slight rustling before she spoke again. “You can look now.” And indeed she wasn’t half naked anymore. “I forget not everyone is used to close quarters. Privacy wasn’t really a thing when living on a plane or a secret base. Sorry.” 

“It’s fine..just unexpected.” Wanda cleared her throat. “So do you and Darcy have some PR campaign plot I’m going to be dragged into for Barnes?” 

Daisy grinned. “No, in fact now that you Avengers have a PR team we won’t meddle...much.” 

“Somehow I doubt that.” Wanda was pretty sure Starks in general were incapable of not meddling constantly. 

Daisy shrugged unrepentantly. “Well I mean we don’t want him to avoid being tried for his crimes.” 

“But you protected me?” Wanda frowned. “Why me but not him?” 

Daisy picked up her duffle bag and led them out of the locker room. She paused to wave at Drew. “See you Wednesday Drew!” 

“Carrot juice is disgusting!” He hollard after them. 

Daisy waited till they were on the sidewalk before replying to Wanda’s question. “A few reasons really. They were going to use it as an excuse to lock up all of us who are different. But mostly you’re just a person from a forgien country, a young female person at that. He’s a beloved American hero. And he was actually brainwashed and no jury is going to convict him.” 

Wanda mulled that over, appreciating absently that Daisy was giving her the chance to think it over. “You thought they were going to lock me up without a trial.” 

“It’s what the Accords would have made legal. Barnes isn’t the type of person you can just make disappear.” Daisy opened the passenger door of a small honda. 

And the thing was thanks to hours of hearing Darcy absently gripe about politics while working on gizmos for Peter, well Wanda could see the shape of it all. It...it scared her to see the disaster that might have been. Still could be if things went very wrong. “You and your siblings have done far more than most realize I think.” 

“Which is exactly how we’d like to keep it.” Daisy hopped into the driver's seat and started up the car. “I mean the kid needs to keep working on local do gooding for another three years minimum. And I...once a spook always a spook I guess.” 

Wanda stared at Daisy. “You would be a horrible spy.” 

“Hey now!” Daisy laughed. “I’ll have you know I'm an excellent undercover operative.” 

Wanda stared at the other woman. “I don’t buy it. You are too solid in who you are.” 

“It’s why they never suspect.” Daisy winked. 

Wanda couldn’t help it, she laughed. Because the idea of Daisy Johnson pretending to be anyone else was laughable. The faintest tingle of her powers warned it might not be quite that laughable though.


	14. The Shape Of Things To Come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thanks for all the comments and everything! They mean a lot.

Daisy leaned against the wall of the slightly dinghy hall while holding her phone to her ear. She was taking a few minutes between rounds of Peter’s decathlon to catch up with her friend. “So you’re running all the labs now?” 

-”Yes that’s what I’ve been saying.”- Jemma’s fondly exasperated tone caused Daisy’s lips to twitch upwards. It was a very specific tone of voice after all. 

She hummed. “Well congratulations on the promotion. That’s good that Director Mace is trusting you all more.” 

-”Yes, it’s quite nice not getting death looks from May. Everyone was so prickly about him being director. And with you gone and the whole manhunt thing. It was quite chaotic. But things have been more orderly lately. Did I tell you, Fitz and I found the perfect apartment?”- Jemma was babbling. 

Daisy rolled her eyes. “Jemma, do I need to use our safeword so you’ll tell me what’s up?”

-”Manscaping? Wait...no we need to change that. I think half the team knows it.”-

“Jemma. What’s wrong?” Daisy shook her head slightly. Not that Jemma could see that but the feeling still counted. 

Jemma was silent for a long minute. -”There’s something about Fitz… he’s keeping something from me and I think it has to do with the Aida unit.”-

“We wiped the knowledge of the darkholm from the LMD.” Daisy’s eyes narrowed, her body tensing ever so slightly. “And Radcliffe's LMD project hasn’t been approved yet.” 

-”I’m not sure that means he’s paused the project.”- Jemma’s voice lowered. -”If he hasn’t we’ll need you.”-

Daisy frowned. “You think Fitz is still helping Radcliff.” She sighed as she considered the danger that involved. “If the LMD project turns to be a real threat Stark would be the Avenger best able to help.”

-”You want to bring Stark in on this? It’s nothing. I’m probably just going crazy with the stress of everything.”- Jemma tried to wave off. 

Daisy straightened, pushing off the wall. “You’re not crazy Jemma. I’ll talk with the family. It shouldn’t be a problem for me to come spend a week working on SHIELD’s firewalls. I’ll look into Radcliffe and the whole Aida thing. If it’s nothing you can take some blood samples like your vampiresce self. It’ll be like old times and SHIELD will have better electronic security. Besides, I’ve missed the team.” 

-”Thank you. I don’t know how to… it’s different without you here.”- Jemma sounded tired more than anything else. 

Daisy settled, it would be good to go back to the team for a while. She wasn’t lying about that, and honestly the Barnes stuff was a type of drama she’d like to avoid. “I’ll brief Stark so if we need robotics assistance he’ll be prepared. But I can be there by tomorrow. Peter’s decathlon is competing today and I tagged along. They’re cute kids.” 

Daisy clapped as Peter’s classmate Michelle answered the last question. She gave a thumbs up to Peter as the team started jumping everywhere as they were declared winners. Daisy shared an amused look with their teacher when Flash Thompson’s voice squeaked as he held the trophy. It would seem she was buying celebratory ice cream for the kids instead of conciliatory. 

“Want to tell me why you’re not going up the monument?” Daisy sat down next to Peter on the public bench. 

He shifted slightly. “I don’t know...just didn’t feel like it.” 

“Huh huh.” Daisy hummed, specifically not looking at him. “And it has nothing to do with the guilty looks you’ve been shooting at Liz?” 

Peter twitched. “Michelle didn’t go up either.” 

“And Michelle delights in being contrary and had a point about slave construction. You on the other hand have been making cow eyes at a girl but turning all guilty and pouty anytime she talks to you. So want to try that again?” 

He groaned, shoulders slumping. “It’s just her dad was the gunrunning guy in the bird suit. She’s moving next week to Oregan. And her dad’s in jail because of us and I…” 

“Ah.” Daisy reached out and dragged Peter into a side hug. “That sucks. Gotta say locking up your girlfriend’s dad is not something I have a speech for.” 

Peter was slightly stiff, but still leaned against her. “She isn’t my girlfriend.” 

“But you wanted her to be?” Daisy prodded gently. Which...she remembered how consuming crushes had been when she was Peter’s age. 

He nodded. “I mean she’s smart and pretty and just so nice.” Peter heaved a sigh. “But I can’t ask her to Homecoming or anything. We dropped her dad from five stories up while his suit caught on fire. He had to get skin grafts. And you know...jail.” 

“No I don’t think she’d be too happy if she found out.” Daisy winced. “I think I’m supposed to say there will be other girls.” 

Peter’s eyes flicked to her in disbelief. “Thanks?”

“I don’t know. I have terrible dating history. I mean Miles is still stuck in China somewhere with a SHIELD babysitting bracelet, I shot, stabbed, and attempted to murder Ward very very hard. And…” 

Peter leaned into her. “You don’t have to talk about Lincoln.” 

“Anyways, maybe talk to Aunt May about it? Or Darcy?” She offered up better alternatives. Really even before SHIELD she hadn’t had the normal sort of life. 

He snorted. “Darcy would...she’s not a good person to ask.” 

“Probably fair.” Daisy groaned as she saw the sudden chaos. “I have a feeling your friends need some help.” 

////

Peter waved at the security officers Daisy had just sent flying. “Sorry!” He ducked into the monument right on Daisy’s heels. 

“Alright, without climbing the side of this thing we’re not going to be able to stop the elevator from falling. So we’re not going to do that.” Daisy’s eyes were sharp as she skidded to the closed elevator doors. 

He politely ignored that while she had her Quake mask and top on, she was very much still wearing jeans. Apparently time for a full change hadn’t been on their side. “Wait, we have to help them!” 

“Of course. Help with the doors.” Daisy grabbed one side of the elevator doors and ripped it open. 

Peter grabbed the other side hauling it back. “So weird.” And it was weird seeing the elevator shaft without well, an elevator in it. “Now what?” 

“When the elevator falls I’ll slow it.” Daisy hopped into the shaft dropping to the ground. “As soon as it stabilizes, get them out of the elevator. Signal me, I’ll launch the thing a few stories up so you can snag and drag me out.” 

He nodded. “Ok um..that sounds like a terrible plan?” 

“You have a better one?” Daisy grinned up at him from the bottom of the shaft. She rolled her shoulders. “It’ll be fine.” 

Peter shot a web attaching a guard’s hand and firearm to the wall. “I want it noted I still think this is a terrible idea.” 

“Eh, it’ll work.” Daisy paused as there was a horrible snapping sound, and then her hands were up, the air vibrating with her powers. 

He only let out a slight yelp of alarm as the elevator car came crashing down, hiding his sister from sight. The gentle vibrations under his feet, and the fact the elevator hadn’t fallen all the way to the bottom of the shaft reassured him she was alive. Peter lept into action. He needed to get everyone off that elevator as quickly as possible.

Peter grabbed the elevator doors and wedged them open. He let out a silent sigh at the sight of his alive but very traumatized looking friends. “Come on!” He waved them out. 

Ned seemed to blink out of his ‘I’m gonna die’ expression first. “Spiderman!” 

Flash blinked and then was sprinting out of the elevator car. 

“Come on. It’s not safe!” Peter grabbed Ned’s shoulder and hauled his friend out. The others got the hint and piled out in a rush of panic. Flash was hugging the floor. 

Peter tapped his comm. “They’re out.” 

The elevator launched upwards. He shot a web hitting Daisy’s side and then yanked. She came shooting out of the shaft. The elevator came crashing back down. She must not have sent it launching up that high because she barely missed it as he hauled her to safety. She skidded across the marble floor. 

Grinning, she patted him on the shoulder. “Good timing.” 

“You!” He spluttered. 

“It ended fine.” Daisy punched his shoulder lightly. 

Ned made a weird gurgling sound. “Holy shit. We got saved by Quake and Spiderman!” 

////

Tony lowered his arm, his suit’s arm folding away. “I could have hurt you kid.” 

“Eh, I could have ducked.” Quake stepped through his lab’s door. “Also you upgraded your security after you fired me. Good call, took me three hours to get in.” 

He decided to just go with exasperated about the kid tearing through his firewalls and physical security. Like at least if someone was making it look easy, it was his kid. “Well, guess I’ll be having to upgrade it all. Again. What are you doing here kid?” 

“Heads up on some possible SHIELD bullshit.” Quake shrugged. “And thanks for the new gauntlets and mask. I’m not sure why you did it, but it means a lot.” 

Tony considered that. He’d been warned enough that even he was aware she was about as fucked up on the family issue as he was. “Well I’d be a pretty shitty bio dad if I didn’t throw money and gifts at my spawn.” 

She stilled and then snorted. “I suppose we weren’t hiding it particularly well.” Quake looked at him, her head tipping ever so slightly. “You should talk to Peter, he’s got a poster of you in his room.” 

“Wasn’t sure you wouldn’t kick my ass if I showed my face near the kid.” Tony watched her curiously, she walked...not like Nat. No Nat was all elgence, his kid wasn’t that. To much slouch, and a certain unhidden power. She walked like if Steve and Nat had had a kid. Which wasn’t that a terrifying thought. 

Quake’s lips twitched. “Well, good to know you’re aware I can kick your ass. Complicated machinery doesn't like localized vibrations.” 

“Is it weird I’m touched you plotted how to murder me? Cause I’m kinda touched.” He tapped his arc reactor. “Thoughts?” 

She snickered. “We’re fucked up?” 

“Not going to argue that.” Tony cleared his throat. “So you said SHIELD bullshit? What more secret Natzs? Mind control? Lay it on me.” 

Quake’s lips twitched. “Think more Terminator.” 

“Someone thought that was a good idea?” He twitched, panic sparking through him. 

She stared at him. “Ultron.” 

“That hurts, but fair.” Tony looked at his daughter, he really didn’t know how to read her. But he was fairly sure she’d be far more tense if the situation was too dangerous. “So you controlling the evil robots then Skyenet?” 

Quake sighed leaning against his work bench, stuffing her hands into her pockets. “Dr Radcliffe made a robot lady. Calls his project LMDs or Life Model Decoys. Idea is to replace people on suicide missions or high risk missions with look alike robots.” 

“That’s a terrible idea. Really terrible idea. I’m saying it’s a terrible idea.” Tony crossed his arms. 

“I know right?” Quake was completely exasperated. “But Mack chopped the LMD’s head off and SHIELD is like...going through his research to see if there’s any of it worth keeping and not just being burned.” 

Tony relaxed slightly, that sounded fairly secured. He was….huh that would explain why his spawn was here talking to him about it. “You’re planning on investigating it’s as handled as SHIELD is saying?” 

“One of my old teammates called. I’m going to go bump up security, look into it. I know the director and the higher ups are aware of how horrifying terminator bots are. But spy stuff.” She brushed some of her hair back. “I have a system set up with Darcy. But if things go FUBAR, you’re the most suited for identifying and destroying robots. Probably won’t need you to do anything, but well back up plans are important.” 

He twitched, he wanted to fly straight to California and let that new director Mace know that he better handle his robot problem. Maybe blow some things up. “I want updates or I’ll come in weapons hot.” 

“Deal.” Quake straightened. “I don’t hate you, you know.” 

Tony felt a slight burning. “But you don’t like me. Which fair, I’ve been informed I’m an acquired taste.” 

“I don’t know, you’re an arrogant asshole with a god complex. But my step dad was a serial killer and I visit him every couple of months. So you know, too soon to tell.” She paused slightly on her way out. “Talk to Peter, he’s good.” 

He dropped his arms. “I appreciate the way you can send people flying with your hands. Very cool.” 

“Thanks.” Daisy grinned and then vanished out the door of his lab. 

Tony groaned. Shit, he was getting attached. 

////

Darcy hummed along to her Beyonce playlist while scribbling notes on her new build of the portal tech. Pushing the notes to the side she grabbed the scrapbook. It was excellent. Also she knew May would love getting this for christmas. Her four newspaper subscriptions, plus the new printer she’d built were paying off. So good. 

“Should I be afraid of whatever that is?” Daisy asked while knocking on the doorframe lightly. 

She turned down the music, closing the scrapbook. “Nope.” Darcy beamed. “So, what’s with the serious face?” 

“Running some system checks for SHIELD. I’ll probably be gone for a week or two.” Daisy gave an amused look at the Thor poster on her wall. “Really?”

Darcy smiled unrepentantly. “I can hold the fort down. And don’t judge. I know you have a star spangled throw blanket, Cap Knows Best sign, and a Cap bobblehead.” 

“First those were gifts when AC found out I was getting my own room. And make sure Peter doesn’t over work himself.” Daisy tossed her the car keys.

Darcy took in the artfully casual aura/stance Daisy was in. “Kick whatever supes evil, world ending, thing’s ass.” 

“Planning on it.” Daisy just looked smug. 

Darcy clamored to her feet. “So need a ride to a bus stop or something in the morning?” 

“I’m good, and aren’t you meeting your new bodyguard tomorrow?” Daisy raised a brow. 

Darcy poked at Daisy’s chest. “You know who it is! Traitor!” 

“Like I wouldn’t vet your future bodyguard.” Daisy rolled her eyes. “And I’m totes stealing him for a beer and catching up when I get back.” 

Darcy grinned in victory. “Former SHIELD then! BooYa.” 

“You two will have fun.” Daisy looked far too delighted. “When he gets grumpy, tell him Liverpool are a bunch of wankers and can’t play their way out of a paper sack.” 

She snorted. “British soccer fan then?” 

“Please call it soccer to his face.” Daisy snickered. 

Darcy patted Daisy’s shoulder. “You’re evil and I support it entirely.” 

Darcy beamed, holding her hand out to the scruffy looking brit in Hill’s office. “Yo! I assume you're my new bodyguard?” 

“Oh I’m going to regret this.” The scruffy brit groaned after looking her up and down. “I’m not protecting some hipster uni girl? Not that desperate yet.” 

Darcy lowered her hand, but her smile just grew. Oh she got why Daisy had been snickering now. “Oh you live with your foot in your mouth don’t you? Is that in his file? Cause sticks foot in mouth should be under skills.” 

“Bad interpersonal skills are.” Hill replied, and while her tone was bland, her eyes were far too bright not to find this hilarious. “And Dr Lewis this Lance Hunter, Hunter this is Dr Darcy Lewis.” 

Hunter shook his head crossing his arm. “Doctor?” 

“Yupperoo.” Darcy enjoyed how his face twitched in horror. 

Hill was definitely biting back a smile as she cut in. “Dr Lewis here is Tony Stark’s illegitimate child. Her work with Dr Foster on creating stable einstein rosen bridges, parentage and the fact she makes tech for Quake and Spiderman make her a target.” 

“You help Quake?” He dropped his hands to his hips. 

Darcy shot finger guns at him. “She said Liverpool are wankers and can’t play their way out of a paper bag. Very bad at soccer.” 

His whole face spasmed. “Where does she get off saying that!”

“It’s true? I mean I googled it and when was the last time they won again?” Darcy was positively smug. This was a type of asshole that would be excellent as a bodyguard. 

Hunter started to reply and then laughed. “Yeah you know Quake.” He shook his head. “Fine I’ll do it. And I want a pay raise. Illegitimate Stark, weird science...bridges, that sounds expensive.” 

“Did you enjoy living in Bangladesh stuck in a studio apartment with no one but Bobbie to talk or interact with?” Hill asked. 

He grumbled. “Fine, I’ll do it.” 

“Come! We are due to force Janey to eat and then there is science to do!” Darcy turned on her heel and marched out to the elevator. She was positively giddy as she heard him following her. Oh she was going to get new blackmail on Daisy. “So new minion, you got any stories about Daisy? Cause I need blackmail material.” 

Hunter hit the correct elevator button. “You’re going to make me regret my life decisions aren’t you?” 

“Oh totally.” Darcy beamed. 

“JANEY NO!” Darcy grabbed the controller out of Jane’s hand. “Bad Jane!” 

Jane glared at her. “I need to run the test again to confirm the aura’s magnetic variance!” 

“Your franken bot isn’t certified not to blow up yet!” Darcy held the controller out of Jane’s reach. “You don’t even insulate your wires!” 

Jane blinked. “I thought you changed that?” 

“I haven’t gotten through all of them!” Her cheeks pinked slightly. “What!? Holo tables and new toys! I’ve been distracted.”

Jane groaned. “We need those readings Darcy!”

“Then use frankenbot march 2. I mean it should work enough for some quick readings and not set the lab on fire!” Darcy chucked the controller at Hunter’s head. 

Hunter startled, barely catching it while dropping his weird sports magazine. “The hell?” 

“March 2 has unreliable results. We can’t use it.” Jane glared. 

Darcy shoved a poptart into Jane’s hand. “Then take a break while I do some finagling so we can run it. It won’t be pretty, but it shouldn't blow up in our faces.” 

“I’ll go get some coffee.” Jane sighed, her shoulders slumping in acceptance at a pause in the mad science. 

Darcy grabbed Hunter’s sports magazine. “Go help the science boss get us all coffee. I’m safe in the lab from evil villains.” 

“I’m not fetching coffee.” Hunter stared at her, he looked like he wished he was dead inside. 

Darcy laughed, oh having a sister who knew her bodyguard was excellent. “I’ll tell Bobbie.” 

“...are you threatening to tattle tale on me?” He asked in disbelief.

Darcy felt like cackling, her chin tipped up slightly. “Yes I am.”


	15. Evil Doesn't Mean Smart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Daisy is off in LA enjoying some time with the team, discovering the LMD bullshit. So just Peter and Darcy this chapter.

Peter blinked. He blinked again. “I didn’t get drugged did I?” 

-“No I see it too.”- Darcy’s voice came through the comms. -”Unless drugs work on cameras now.”-

He hopped up onto a car. “Hey uh..Mr Villain?” 

“I am no mere Villain! I am a superior man!” The...villain proclaimed. His appearance was so bizarre the civilians weren’t running. In fact everyone had phones up as they stared at the man like he was a train wreck. A bizarre, brightly colored, french accented, mustached, and just weird train wreck. The villain didn’t seem to realize it was horrified confusion he was being looked at by the masses as he continued to speak. “I am Batroc The Leaper! Bow before my magnificence!” 

Peter gaped...it was probably a good thing no one could see his face when he was dressed as Spiderman. “I mean no judgement but that is a lot of purple Mr Leaper.” 

-”You should say it with judgement. He is wearing purple latex with only a hole in it for his face to pop out of, yellow boots, yellow accents, purple bug eyes goggles and has a mustache that has so much wax in it to curl I’m not sure if it actually contains hair anymore!”- Darcy sounded mortally offended over the comms. 

“I DEMAND! That Captain America surrender to me!” Leaper proclaimed. 

He blinked yet again. “Hey, Mr Leaper. Have you considered community theatre?” 

“FOOL! I, THE MIGHTY LEAPER! Shall defeat you!” Leaper...lept straight for him with surprising speed. 

Peter slid under the flying kick thing and jumped away. “Hey uh… I’m not sure if you actually have committed a crime?” 

Leaper came flying down in a downward kick that smashed the roof of the car Peter had just been on in. 

He frowned. “I guess vandalism? Fashion? That outfit is a crime against fashion.” Peter ducked under another kick crashing through the window of a bakery. “Mr Leaper could you stop breaking things?” 

“HOLD STILL SO THAT I MAY KICK YOU!” Leaper cried out. 

Peter shrugged, guess talking him down wasn’t happening. The crazy was wafting off the man. “Sounds fake, but ok.” He twisted, avoiding the incoming kick, and drove his elbow into the man’s throat. 

Leaper hit the ground, hands clutching his throat as he choked and wheezed. 

“You ok there Mr Leaper?” Peter webbed the man’s hands together and then webbed his legs...like a lot. Then some more. “Sorry about the leg cocoon but like you got quite the leap there.” 

Leaper wheezed, but glared….

-”Is he ok? Like I wasn’t expecting him to go down that fast.”- Darcy asked. 

Peter poked the guy. “Hey Mr, are you ok? I didn’t think that was going to work?” 

“Merde.” Leaper hissed out. 

-”Oh he’s fine.”- Darcy was relieved. -”Just web him to a lamp post and grab some potstickers or eggrolls or something. Running backend like this is hungry work.”-

Peter shot a web at Leaper’s feet and then a lamppost. He gave a half salute to the people watching. “See ya!” 

“Should I be worried I took down a superpowered bad guy in like one move?” Peter stuffed a forkful of chowmein into his mouth. 

Darcy grabbed the dumpling with her cheap chopsticks. “His power was ‘he jump good’.”

“It was pretty ridiculous.” Peter snickered. 

Darcy hummed as she chewed. “Was his suit really latex, it looked latex through the goggle camera.” 

“I think it was.” He flopped onto his back. “It’s weird not having Daisy here.” 

She flicked his nose. “She’s getting in some good fam time with the team. ‘Sides we can marathon action movies without having to hear how terrible people’s forms are and why that’s not how real spies do it. I need me some Bond. James Bond.” 

Peter laughed. “She’s really bad about that.” 

“Mission Impossible!” Darcy reached over him grabbing his laptop. “We’re getting started right now.” 

He sat up, grabbing the orange chicken. “What about that old Star Wars movie?” 

“I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that.” Darcy ruffled his hair. “And Daisy likes those ones, so does Aunt May. What about Die Hard?” 

Peter frowned as both their cells went off. “Oh that’s not good.” 

////

Amira Ahmed hissed as she was shoved onto a chair. She blinked looking around the cement cell. Good news, nothing felt broken. Bad news, researching Inhuman abuse had gotten her kidnapped out of a fucking McDonalds in Michigan of all places. Not a war zone in the Middle East. Not the bullshit terror that was the South Sudan story. Not the three years she spent chasing down an international sex trafficing ring across Europe. No illegal US government approved human experimentation in fucking Michigan. 

She glared at the guy who was clearly going to be her interrogator...possibly executor. But positive thinking. Huh, that was one of the Watchdogs. “How big is the check you’re getting from ATCU?” 

“None of your business.” The Watchdog pulled out a gun. “Now you’re going to tell me what you know or things are going to go very badly for you.” 

The metal door swung open, Watchdog thug seized as he collapsed into a twitching pile, and Darcy fucking Stark stuck her head in. “Sup, and things that’s going to go supes bad for you.” 

“Darcy?” Amira spluttered. 

Darcy slammed the door shut behind her. She pulled out a pocket knife and stepped over and started cutting off her bindings. “We got the SOS. Good news we’re getting you out. Bad news Quake’s doing a thing for SHIELD so you’re going to want to be ready to shoot your way out.” 

Amira winced, but accepted the gun shoved into her hands. “I’m not a good shot.” 

“Don’t worry, it’s dendrotoxin. Totes non lethal.” Darcy held out her hand. “Ready to blow this shit stand?” 

She brought the gun up and swallowed. “Right…” 

“Don’t worry, I brought my bodyguard. He’s kinda badass. And very scruffy.” Darcy swung the door open and darted out of the cell. 

Amira typed on her laptop while crammed into the floor space of the sedan. “Get to the local news station. This is big and we should be safe there.” 

“I don’t know if you noticed but we’re kind of being chased sweetheart!” The Stark Bodyguard snapped from where he was driving. They went squealing around a corner.

Darcy reloaded her pistol with the glowing blue rounds of dendrotoxin. “I may have miscalculated.” She aimed out the shattered back window and started shooting at the pick up truck following them. 

“Just bailing out a friend, that’s all.” The Bodyguard snarked. “Just a fucking walk in the park. I am not being paid enough for this!” 

Darcy fired off another burst of rounds. “Well I didn’t know that the Watchdogs relocated to bumfuck Lansing Michigan! It’s not like I was planning on dying for good PR!” 

The hotwired car went screeching around another corner. 

“You live in AVENGERS TOWER!” The Bodyguard snapped, his foot very much all the way down on the gas. 

Amira finished off her article. It’d been mostly written, she’d just needed proof. And well being kidnapped had been good for something. “The WLNS news! Or News 6, whatever just get there! An illegal covert gang of nazis isn’t going to risk having their faces plastered all over the airways!” 

“FINE!” Bodyguard hit the brakes and then they were spinning. It was nauseating, and then with a jerk they were accelerating off. 

The passenger windows shattered from gunfire. Darcy flattened herself down on the bench seat she’d been kneeling on. She let out a shriek as she covered her head. “I hate Lansing!” 

“Preaching to the choir.” The Bodyguard tossed a fucking grenade back to Darcy, who surprisingly caught it. “Let’s give our tail something to regret.” 

Darcy grinned yanking the pin and chucking a live grenade out the back window. “Booyah Bitches!” 

“WAIT!” Amira gaped in horror, too late. “You can’t throw grenades in a city!” 

The Bodyguard looked back at her and winked. “Nonlethal sweetheart!” He snapped back to where they were going. “Name’s Hunter by the way. And being friends with the eggheads who invented dendrotoxin rounds has benefits. Like endless nonlethal weapons.” 

“I think that got most of them.” Darcy peeked over the back of the seats. “Yup. Ok tail is gone.” 

Hunter grunted. “We might survive this.” 

“You know this is the first car chase I’ve been in.” Amira found herself saying. She closed the laptop. Her story was done, the condemning files and video embedded in it and ready to be sent out. 

Darcy looked at her in confusion. “But you're a war correspondent?” 

“Usually I have a bulletproof vest, and I’m not the one they’re specifically shooting at.” Amira snorted. “You know I half expected the kidnapping and being shot at when I was covering the Ten Rings. Definitely was expecting it when I covered the sex trafficking. This seemed the safest story I’ve run in years.” 

Hunter laughed outright. “Government crimes are always the most dangerous.” 

Amira had to admit he had a point. An uncomfortable one. “Wait, where’s the Spiderkid?” 

“He’s calling in Tony from the jet.” Darcy reloaded her pistol. “Officially because someone had to get those computer drives to the jet. Unofficially because we’re not dragging the kid into a gun fight.” 

Amira set the laptop down. “Higher chance of death but cleaner conscious. I can live with it.” 

“Hold on, we’re crashing through the front of the station!” Hunter barked at them.

The car crashed through the glass front of the building. Hunter slammed on the breaks sending them into a tailspin across the foyer. And then they finally, finally, jerked to a halt. There was the weirdest moment of silence. And then the gunshots started up again. 

Darcy and Hunter both returned fire. Hunter ripped the passenger door open and hauled Amira out of the floor of the car. “Come on!” 

Amira kept her head down and let the clearly military trained Hunter drag them behind the welcome counter. “Is that the cops shooting at us?!” 

“Bang!” Darcy ducked back under the counter. “Yup, and the Watchdogs. Good to know they’re working together.” 

Amira hissed, ignoring the screaming as various employees ducked and covered. “Are they insane!? There’s security cameras! This is a news station!” 

Hunter pulled out another one of the hand grenades and yanked out the pin. “Heads down!” And hucked it. 

“You know I never knew, but bad guys be dumb.” Darcy shot a guy trying to come around the corner. The blue veins of dendrotoxin spread across his face as he keeled over. “Like I had higher standards. But between this and the Leaper moron I’m reevaluating my standards!” 

Amir hugged her laptop to her chest. She couldn’t let it get hit, the evidence! “How many are there?” 

“HEY BAD GUYS!” A far too chipper voice called out. 

Darcy’s head popped up and she started shooting fairly indiscriminately. “I TOLD YOU TO WAIT IN THE JET!” 

Amira sighed in relief as she saw a spider web hit the wall and a blur of red and blue swing by. Their chances of survival just went up. And based off the screaming and blurs of people going flying Spiderman was doing great. 

Amira marched into the newsroom and ignored the terrified camera crew and news anchors. Oh good they were still live. She marched straight in front of the cameras, laptop securely under one arm and started addressing the camera. “My name is Amira Ahmend and I’m a news correspondent with Global News. And I’m here to tell you that the United States government division ATCU is working with the Watchdogs to traffic Inhumans on US soil.” 

A police officer, a bribed one clearly, came running out, gun drawn. She felt her life flash slightly. And then Darcy had tased the man. 

Darcy raised a thumbs up. “And apparently have bribed the fuck out of some of these cops.” 

“This is difficult to believe, but I have the evidence to back up my claims.” Amir forced her voice to stay calm. This was her moment. Once this was out no one could stop it.

////

Tony was working some of his frustrations out on his newest car. But being under the hood settled him. Machines made sense. Science, puzzles to invent and solve were where everything just slotted into place. The heavy beat of his music, his hands physically fixing things. It was as close to meditation as he was ever going to get.

-”Sir, I believe you may wish to watch the news out of Michigan.”- FRIDAY’s voice chimed, the AI automatically turning off the music. 

He rolled out from under the car. “What did I say about disturbing me FRIDAY?” 

-”Miss Lewis and Mr Parker seem to be in some trouble. You asked to be notified if one of your children required your assistance.”- FRIDAY replied. 

Tony stilled. And then was jumping into his suit. Also, what the fuck were his spawn doing in Michigan?

Tony stared at his spawn. Peter was in his suit and shuffling like he was going to get grounded, Darcy had a stubborn upward tilt to her chin. The glass, dust, and general debri in her hair and jacket was enough to say she’d been in more of the action than her brother. Hunter was slouched against the side of the jet. 

He crossed his arms. “You stole one of my jets, left without leaving so much as a note, broke into a Watchdog gang hideout, got into a cross city car chase, shot several dirty cops with tranq rounds, half destroyed a news station, and publicly announced the US government is working with a known terrorist group to abduct Inhumans. Anything else you want to add?” 

“Technically I’m skipping school?” Peter added while pulling his mask off. “But Amira needed our help.” 

Tony could physically feel his blood pressure rising. “And you didn’t think of asking for help? Quake’s not here to bail you out right now.” 

“We had it handled.” Darcy scoffed. “I mean other than some bruises we’re good.” 

Peter nodded. “And you didn’t pick up your phone!”

“You should have called me when you first realized something was wrong!” Tony wondered if this was how Pepper felt. He should get her a gift...so many gifts. “You’re both kids!” 

Darcy’s chin tipped up slightly. “Not sorry. But I’m good not doing that again.” 

“Yeah it was uh...there were a lot of guns.” Peter nodded in agreement. 

Tony ran a hand through his hair. “You two are going straight home. And you’re grounded! I’m not sure from what but you are.” 

“I’m a grown up Poptarts.” Darcy looked far too smug. “But is this place fine with us all just leaving? I mean they’ve got corruption, Watchdogs, and apparently the ATCU.” 

He pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Rhodney I just need to know that something is happening to keep this city from turning to chaos or else my daughter is going to decide to conquer the damn place.” Tony paced out in front of the jet. 

Rhodney was not helpful. -”This whole thing is a nightmare Tony! It’s the only thing on the news. The FBI is sending in people, the Governor was talking about sending in some National Guard till they know how deep the corruption in the local police force is. It’s a mess.”-

“Rhodney my Spawn has a taser and apparently thinks that means she can replace seal team six. I need better than that.” Tony realized what he was going to have to do. “I’ll stay and keep the peace. But if I have to stay in Michigan longer than necessary I will have my revenge.” 

Rhodney had the audacity to laugh. -”You deserve this man.”-

“That is slander.” 

////

May glared at her wayward children. “So Tony called.” 

“We had to save Ms Ahmed’s life.” Peter protested. 

She gave him the look all mothers learned. “You had other options and you know it young man. Tony Stark may not be able to ground you but I can. You go to school and you come straight back home. No screens either!” May turned on Darcy. “And you young lady. No screens, no alcohol, and you come straight home from work.” 

Both kids winced and curled slightly. “Yes Aunt May.” 

“Good, the next time something like this happens you tell me.” May looked between them. “We’re a family. Which means we decide on cross country rescue missions together.” 

Darcy winced slightly. “Sorry..we just kinda did it.” 

“I can tell.” May had not been expecting the morning news to involve seeing her kids in Michigan. “You half scared me to death.” 

Peter scuffed at the floor with his foot. “I’m sorry Aunt May. We just..didn’t think about it. The alert went and we just...we promised we’d help her.” 

“You should have come to me. I’m disappointed in both of you. But there’s no point harping on about spilt milk.” May stepped forward and hugged both of them to her as tightly as possible. “I’m so grateful you’re both safe.” 

“Sorry.” Peter mumbled against her shoulder. 

May reluctantly let the two kids go. “Now go clean up, both of you.” She ignored the guilty looks and turned into the kitchen. And honestly why was Daisy apparently the one with common sense? God help them. 

May wordlessly handed the knife to Darcy as the girl edged into the kitchen. 

Darcy started chopping the vegetables. “So...I should have said something to you.” 

“You should have.” May pulled out the pot. “But you saved a woman’s life. You did the wrong thing for the right reasons.” 

Darcy brushed a stray wet lock of her hair behind one ear. “I forgot we were a team, a family. I won’t do it again.” 

“That’s all I ask.” May felt something unclench. They were going to be fine. “And I am proud that all three of you are the type of people whose first instinct is to help.” 

Darcy bumped their shoulders together gently. “To be fair we figured it was like an Inhuman who thought Amira was a nark or something.” 

“I assumed. I thought common sense was how you survived your last two alien invasions?” May chided with good humor in her voice. 

Darcy’s eyes brightened. “Well not driving into a tornado and running from the alien elves was just instinct. But I still helped evacuate and carted the magic science sticks around.” 

“You all are going to turn my hair grey. I hope you know that.” May smiled at the kid. 

Peter turned on the Billy Joel album. He gave her his best ‘don’t you love me?’ look. 

“Oh bribery, well if we’re doing that, the gutters weren’t cleaned out by the previous owners.” May enjoyed the nose wrinkle of disgust on Peter’s face. “And somebody’s powers mean you’ll be perfectly safe.” 

His shoulders slumped, but a lightness was returning to him. “Alright Aunt May.” 

“And the last few boxes still need to be unpacked.” She gave a pointed look at Darcy. 

Darcy half laughed, half giggled. “Well since the kid and I have some free time we can build those bookshelves for you. Ikea furniture can’t be that hard to put together.” 

“Why don’t you do that.” May bit back her instinctive laughter at that. Oh those sweet summer children. They had no idea the hell that was swedish furniture instructions.


	16. Code Purplenurbles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I describe borsht as delicious in this chapter. I've had the misfortune of eating it once, it was terrible. But I was at a friends house, and her Russian mom was very excited about the homemade Russian food. So I ate that whole damn bowl with a smile on my face. I still twitch at the thought of that god forsaken soup.

Tony hovered above the SHIELD headquarters. The smoke, blown hole in the side of the base, the complete lack of movement. Something had gone really, really wrong here. And what was this, two for three on his kids calling him in too late for giant disasters? He didn’t deserve this. 

Lowering into what had to be the hanger he scanned the destruction. He frowned, someone had blown the quinjets. “FRIDAY what are you getting?” 

-”Highly dissipated knock out gas. Explosive residue is from c4. I’m reading twenty connective ports in the containment box twenty feet to your right.”- 

Tony sent out two of his drones. They’d scan the rest of the base while he investigated here. But he had a horrible tickling sensation, saying the danger here had passed. Which meant his kid was very much not here. He opened up the door of the containment unit. “Fuck.” 

It was rows of identical replicas of Jeffory Mace, SHIELD Director. That was a very, very bad sign. He shot one through the chest. “FRIDAY scan the LMDs.” 

-”Life signs detected inside the Playground sir.”- FRIDAY spoke. -”I have located twenty two heat signatures inside the base. They all seem to be unconscious.”-

Tony left the containment box and made his way into the base. It was...well an hour of sweeping rooms and he knew whatever had happened was bad. The robot stabbinated to death in the labs, that was a lot of blood. Because of course once activated these robots bled. Fun. Faint blood trail from there to the boiler room. Then the shattered and broken robot remains radiating outwards from the boiler room. He called Hill. 

-”Stark what do you have? Since the order to go dark signal went out there’s been nothing from the Playground.”- 

He pulled up the simulation he was running on the SHIELD holotable of what he was fairly sure what had happened. “It’s a guess, but my guesses are other people’s facts. There are twenty two unconscious agents in the base. Looks like the LMDs got brought in while several models were attempting to replace the higher ranking agents.” 

“One of the scientists seems to have got wise. There’s an LMD in the labs that was stabbed a half dozen times. Surviving scientist made it to the boiler room. There they met up with Quake. They gassed the base with knock out gas. Then Quake fought a path of mass destruction through the base.”

Tony swallowed, his voice feeling tight as he saw the blood stains in the upper lab he was in. FRIDAY’s scans confirmed it was blood with a high degree of commonality with his own. “Quake was shot in the upper labs, at least twice. From there the scientist and Quake dosed a couple of agents and took a quinjet. There’s one missing and there was a blood trail. They sabotaged the other quinjets and went who the fuck knows where. I think it was them who sent out the ‘go dark’ signal.” 

-”Get what evidence you can, I’ve contacted a team that can collect the agents who are unconscious.”- 

Tony looked at the blood splatter. “I have FRIDAY seeing what she can do about tracing these LMDs. Do you have anything on Radcliffe? I believe I should pay him a visit.” And kick his stupid ass. 

Tony was halfway to his Malibu home when he got a message in his internal system. He came to an abrupt stop, as a video feed request popped up in the corner of his helmet. Landing he stepped out of the suit, his suit projecting the video feed. “Is Quake alright?” He demanded immediately. Because nobody would have managed to link a communication to FRIDAY, a direct video link directly into the suit except for her. 

-”Holy shit you’re Tony Stark.”- The woman with short hair gaped as she stared at him. 

He noted at least two people behind her. “Great observational skills. Really, I can see why SHIELD hired you. Now is Quake alright?” 

-“She’s alive.”- A different woman spoke up, her face coming into focus over the first woman’s shoulder.- “My name is Elena and Quake said to contact you as soon as she and Jemma went under.”- 

Tony did not like the implication there.”So why don’t you explain to me sweetheart what Quake just went under for?”

-”We’ll send you our coordinates. And I’m not your sweetheart Stark.”-

////

Darcy was shaking with rage. “I’m going to buy a sledgehammer. Take that sledgehammer and break this piece of extremely shitty plywood bullshit designed for torture. And then I’m going to put on some groovy tunes and forget this pain.” 

“Uh… I mean we can still figure it out. I think we need to attach L-1 to P-2...or P-3?” Peter winced from where he was hanging from the ceiling and reading the instructions. 

She ran a hand through her hair. “I have a doctorate. This swedish crap is some alien plot to destroy brain cells.” 

“No it’s P-2. Can you pass the two sided screw?” Peter’s face was scrunched up as he held the instructions in one hand, the other rubbing at his jaw. 

Darcy let out a low cackle. “No, I’ll make a flamethrower. Burn it to ash.” She absently passed the aforementioned screw to Peter. “I have some hair spray we could use as an accelerant.” 

“We’re grounded, remember?” Peter dropped from the ceiling and started trying to fit two pieces together. “Besides, Aunt May really liked these ones.” 

Darcy groaned. “Fine.” She bit back a laugh as one of the boards snapped in Pete’s hands. “Or we could order an already built one and hide our shame in the neighbor’s trash bin?” 

“We could have Hunter pick it up?” Peter suggested. 

She ruffled his hair. “Penance bookshelf here we come.” Darcy slid her phone out. Some unknown number had texted her. “Telemarketers are the wor….” She trailed off as she read the text. It should have been nonsense. -Code Purplenurbles, Poprocks Incoming. Tremors in Operation Red Pill.-

“Darcy?” Peter looked up at her with a frown. 

Darcy swallowed. “Sweet Thor.” She ran through the single dumbest code they’d set up. “Peter put your suit on under your clothing. Then go get May right now.” 

“No way, no suit while we’re grounded.” Peter hopped to his feet. “What’s going on?” 

She held out the phone showing the text. “Daisy just announced Purplenurbles.” 

“Terminators enforcing the Matrix? That’s ridiculous. I mean those aren’t even from the same franchise the chances of….” Peter’s eyes widened as he read the text. “I’ll go get Aunt May.” 

Darcy yanked her hair back into a ponytail. “I’ll get the gobags ready. We’ll be safer in the tower with Wanda than on the run.”

Darcy had a really bad feeling when she saw the Ironman suit waiting for her in the tower. “So… how about the killer robots Poprocks?” 

-“I’m not really here.”- The suit said in his voice. Which cool interface. -“I’ve located Daisy. She’s plugged herself into a something called the Framework.”- 

Yuppers, that was shitty news. “Correct me if I’m wrong but the Framework wouldn’t happen to basically be the Matrix being run by terminators in a plot to conquer the world?”

-”She told you what was happening and then still did it?!”- Despite the robotics his voice screeched slightly. 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “I got unreplyable text from a burner phone. I’m guessing you need me?”

-”I’ll be there in an hour. Then we’re going to an oil rig. We don’t have long so I’m going to need your help or anyone who dies in the Framework is going to die here too.”-

Her hands shook slightly as she tipped her chin up. “Got it, I’ll grab your portable tool kit.” 

Darcy stayed firmly behind Tony’s armored back. “So, not that I’m not loving the father daughter bonding trip to the robot infested oil rig. But uh...I’m too young and hot to die by sexy terminator.” 

“Two more left Spawn, and here I was thinking you were getting into the whole shootout thing. I seem to remember in Michigan you playing at seal team 8.” 

Darcy winced as Tony blasted a hole through a person. The robot man twitched, sparks flickering from the chest cavity and his eyes. And then the LMD collapsed like a doll. Her nose wrinkled up. “Isn’t that like a fourth copy of the Watchdog leader?” 

“Oh good my spawn can count.” Tony tapped his shoulder, a small drone detaching from his shoulder piece and flying down a hallway. “Alright Spawn, once we get to the central hub you just start getting the Framework eggs or pods or whatever the agents are in separated. Ignore everything else, I’ll take care of it.” 

Darcy gave a salute. “Gotcha Poprocks.” 

They came round a corner, Tony blasting the door open and then...nothing? 

She peeked around his shoulder and huh...just six people in what basically looked like low budget borge charging stations. “Uh...very Star Trek.” Darcy stepped around her dad and started prying the metal siding off one. Time to see what she was dealing with. 

“Huh, I get it.” Tony’s face mask popped off, and then he was stepping out of his suit. He marched straight to the computer bank and plugged in a hard connection for FRIDAY. 

Darcy bit at her lower lip while following the cords to see what plugged in where. “Whaddya get?” 

“Evil terminator is hot. If you’re into evil robots.” Tony started pulling up information on the computer bank. 

She gave him a look. “Really? How many corporate spies managed to get into SI by flashing some boob?” Darcy yanked out a green wire. Huh, that was sloppy wiring. Someone did this on a timetable. 

Tony just chuckled. “Getting in doesn’t mean they got anything. Well, that I didn’t give them.” 

“So gross old man.” Darcy pulled out a pocket knife and moved to the next piece of paneling to pry off. “Right, this ‘they die in the matrix they die for realsies sitch.’ I think I can get us into the system. If you can get the disconnect from the Framework slower so they have a chance to get a dreamy edge they might survive?” 

Tony frowned as he started to type, the suit raising its arm towards the lady on the far end who was totally one of the terminators. “Give me an hour.” 

“I can cut it down to one connection per borg charger/Framework hookup.” Darcy groaned at the mess of wires… “It’s going to take a while though.” 

“Well let’s hope Quaker Shaker can keep them alive in there, till we can get some safety wheels on this set up. Or get them out. That’d make things easier.” Tony clapped his hands together, a manic light in his eye. 

////

Daisy’s eyes snapped open as she sucked in a desperate gasp of air. She was half way up and off the flat medical table before hissing and stilling. “Darcy?” 

“Hey sis.” Darcy caught her gently. “Breathe, evil terminator bots dead.” 

Daisy looked to Jemma who was crying silently. “Jemma?” 

“We have to find Fitz.” Her voice cracked as she whipped at her face. “But he came through? He came through.” 

Daisy nodded. “He came through. We just have to get to the oil rig.” 

“Fun fact, we’re already there.” Darcy had a hand on her shoulder keeping her from standing up immediately. “Aida and her weird eastern european Watchdog robots are totes dust. Tony’s good at KOing LMDs. You’re good dude..and also have two bullet holes and look like you just went ten rounds with the Rock.” 

She couldn’t. “The Framework?” 

“FRIDAY is connected to it.” Darcy gently, painfully gently really, pushed at her shoulder. “No running off to fight terminators while stuck in the fucking matrix by yourself. It took Tony and I like three hours to track you and then the oil rig down. Then had to blow up some crazy evil robots. And changing the rigging of the Framework set up so we could get you fucks out, even if you died in there.” 

Daisy huffed, her heart filling with relief. She was home. Not the sick world where Hydra ruled. Where everyone she cared for was dead or some sick twisted version of themselves. She leaned in, letting her head fall on Darcy’s shoulder. “Thank you.” 

“Duh. Barely got Mace out.” Darcy huffed. “Nearly gave me a heart attack when everything started beeping like that.” 

Jemma stiffened. “Mace is alive?” 

“Wicked hangover and was having an existential crisis while guarding the others on the rig, but yeah.” Darcy shrugged. 

Daisy let out a sigh of relief. They hadn’t lost him. She slid to her feet, easily slipping out of Darcy’s grip. “They’re here?” 

“Yup.” Darcy gestured to the exit. 

Jemma was sprinting out to find Fitz.

Daisy limped, her leg burned, getting shot in the leg hurt, who knew. As she came down the ramp she saw Coulson and May. She didn’t care about the pain moving caused, she just flung herself at them. “You made it!” 

“Daisy!” Coulson hugged her tightly. 

She could see over his shoulder, Tony was watching. His suit was half on and he had the oddest expression on his face. Daisy’s smile felt tremulous. She still felt shaken and just..hurt by just everything. But the fight was done. They were allowed to actually feel their pains. And she was so grateful that that was the case. She’d come out ready to fight Aida. She mouthed the words ‘Thank you’ to Tony. 

He seemed to still and then a smug smirk transformed his face and he winked at her. 

Daisy closed her eyes and then let go of Coulson and May. She looked around, wincing slightly at the shaking wreck that was Fitz, but then swallowed thickly as she saw Mack still plugged in. “Is there any way to get him out?” 

“He’ll survive the Framework failing, or dying in there. But it won’t be pretty.” Tony replied easily. 

Daisy stayed focused on her former partner. “He won’t come out till the end then.” 

“There’s nothing else you could have done.” Coulson laid a hand on her shoulder in comfort.

Daisy nodded as she turned, she saw the quiet conversation between May and Mace in one corner. That was...good. May hadn’t killed him. Not permanently at least. Well...Daisy could see the shakes Mace had, the way he was holding himself. “Is the damage permanent?” 

“I don’t know.” Coulson set his shoulders. “But we’ll take care of him.” 

Daisy leaned ever so slightly against Coulson. “I’m not coming back.” 

“I know.” Coulson smiled tightly at her. It was probably as genuinely as any of them were going to be able to smile for a while after the nightmare of the Framework. 

She took his hand and squeezed it. “What’s the plan?” 

“Do a head check, make sure no LMDs survived. Destroy the darkholme.” Coulson seemed to come alive ever so slightly as he started thinking through the project that lay ahead. 

Daisy winced as she shifted. “Physical therapy is going to suck. I haven’t missed it.” 

////

Pietro walked, stiffly but he was walking without the damn walker, out of the quinjet. He beamed as he saw Wanda exactly where he’d known she’d be. “Hey sis.” 

“Pietro!” Wanda’s feet barely touched the ground as she flung her arms around his shoulders, hugging him tightly. 

He wrapped his arms around her. “I missed you.” Pietro felt the need to say it, even as he felt her power settling into him once more, their familier link settling back to how it was. He didn’t question that she was clearly feeling for his pain and any hurts he still had. He’d have done the same if he had her powers. Even without controlling their link he could feel an echo of her. 

The relief they both felt at being reunited was dizzying. His eyes were wet as they clung to each other. “Never again.” 

“Never.” She agreed, her agreement bone deep as it reverberated between them. 

Clint’s warm chuckles came from inside the jet as he loped out with his easy baring. He had both of their bags slung over one shoulder. “So we go away for a few months and this happens.” 

“Eight months.” Wanda countered as she released him, but stayed near him. 

Pietro gently mirrored her, their simple ease returning as if they’d never been separated. “So you promised terrible american junk food.” 

“If it still exists.” Wanda rolled her eyes, but her emotions were fond. “We have unexpected company.” 

He concentrated on her, but there was no sign or feel of her being upset by that. “Your new friends?” 

“The Parkers are staying till a disaster of some kind is handled. Apparently I’m the scariest person they trust to watch out for them.” And there was a thread of affection and pride there. 

Pietro leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her hair. “Good, you are terrifying and good.” 

“Any details on that disaster?” Clint asked, his face still at ease, but there was a tension there.

Wanda let out the most beleaguered sigh. “Whatever code Purplenurbles is. I believe they think I know what that means. Whatever it is Stark took Darcy with him for ‘mechanical assistance’ and Rhodey went to ‘blow some LMDs up’.” 

“Well, then I leave you two to get settled in.” Clint traipsed to the tower entrance, though his movements had purpose. 

Pietro let her feel his exasperation as Wanda used her powers to snag his bag from him. “I could have carried that.” 

“You have an appointment with Dr Cho tomorrow. No heavy lifting until you are cleared for it.” She replied without so much as batting an eyelash. 

He huffed as he followed behind her. His movements still stiff, and she did walk slower for him, but he enjoyed walking beside her. “So is it just Ms Parker and Peter?” 

“Darcy’s bodyguard Hunter was pouting in the kitchen for a while. But then his ‘Hellbeast of Beauty and Perfection’ called and he went rushing out.” Wanda was...she was good. 

Pietro’s eyes crinkled around the edges. “I’m surprised, living in the tower has been good for you.” 

“Not at first.” Wanda corrected gently as the elevator doors closed. “Did you bring the photos from the farm?” 

He smiled. “Of course, I’ve promised to call and read bedtime stories.” 

“We should hang some of them. The apartment is very….large.” Wanda finally settled on. 

Pietro whistled. “That is an understatement from the videos you’ve shared.” 

“Stark has been very generous.” Her eyes narrowed. “When he isn’t keeping me locked inside.” 

He felt his body vibrate so fast his edges surely blurred to anyone watching. The fury he felt was… but she did not need him to rage. “I may accept Stark intends to help. Is willing to die to protect. But I do not like him.”

“I agree. But it was not without reason.” Wanda’s feelings were confused, wavering as they brushed against him. 

Wanda’s red powers opened the door for them. And then a teenage boy zipped out, eagerly grabbing Pietro’s bag. “Hey Mr Pietro! How you run so fast is super cool. And I’ve heard so much about you. It’s really good to meet you!” 

“Which means you must be Peter.” Pietro held out his hand, smiling as he shook the kid’s hand. “Thank you for being kind to my sister.” 

Peter bounced backwards, bag slung over his shoulder. “Of course, sorry we’re hiding out in your apartment right now. There’s a thing with terminators and the matrix so ya know.” He shrugged as if ‘what can you do’ and any of that made sense. 

“The soup is simmering just fine dear.” A woman who must be the infamous May Parker bustled forward and immediately hugged Wanda. She looked at him and oh. Her face was warm and welcoming and so painfully ‘mom’. “It’s lovely to meet you young man.” 

Pietro understood what he’d begun to suspect while talking with Wanda recently. She hadn’t been befriended by Quake, Darcy and Peter so much as dragged into this small family. He could feel Wanda’s affection for these people, and for that alone he would have loved them. But as he was bustled in and herded to the couch by May, while Peter started pestering Wanda and him with excited questions, he was sure he would love them for themselves. 

Pietro hummed in delight as he took his first bite of borscht. “I’ve missed this. We should make duruny.” 

“Only if you help.” Wanda’s lips twitched up as she handed a bowl to Peter.

Peter perked up. “I can help too?” 

“No Starks in my kitchen without supervision except for Darcy.” Wanda replied without blinking. 

Pietro grinned as he looked at the kid. “You want to learn how to make Sokovian food?” 

“Why not?” Peter’s head tilted slightly. 

He laughed. “Of course you can help us then. I’ve missed the food from our home while I’ve been at the farm.” 

“My brother is partial to duruny. I could always bribe him when we were younger with them.” Wanda teased lightly. 

Peter’s eyes brightened as he took a bite of the borscht. He then dug in with enthusiasm. May gave Peter a fond look. She smiled at Wanda. “What is duruny?” 

“They are savory potato pancakes. Our mother made it to go with dinner and then we would eat the leftovers for breakfast the next day.” Pietro explained happily, he was going to gorge himself on them if he was going to make them. 

Wanda let out a light laugh. “Leftover duruny while you were in the house? We remember that very differently brother.” 

“I am wounded, you would say lies like that.” Pietro laughed, this was good. It felt like it would be home.

Wanda stilled mid movement. And then she was turning towards the door. “Daisy’s back.” Her magic lit up around her fingers as she used her abilities to open the door. And there in the now open door were who had to be Daisy and Darcy. 

Of the two girls the one wearing an outfit complete with colorful scarf and oversized knit sweater had to be Darcy. Besides she didn’t look dangerous, which according to Wanda meant she was the most dangerous of the siblings. One arm over Darcy’s shoulders and leaning fairly heavily on her was who must be Daisy. Daisy was wearing some sort of dirty oversized black ops pants, a tank top and a SHIELD black ops jacket. Also she had two facial cuts that looked like they needed stitches but had been taped shut. Darcy raised a hand, voice shockingly perky. “Sup! I bringeth the prodigal daughter home once more.” 

“Hey!” Daisy grumbled as they limped, and it was very clear Daisy wasn’t putting much weight on one leg, into the apartment. Pietro felt a wave of worry from Wanda.

The kid, Peter half launched himself across the room, half ran to them. He actually slid the last few inches as he seemed to realize tackling them was a terrible idea. “You’re Back!!” He chirped excitedly

“Come here kid.” Daisy’s arm moved slightly awkwardly, but she pulled him into a loose hug. 

Darcy looked up over Peter’s shoulder at Wanda, a smug grin on her face. “I’ve got an idiot to join your idiot in physical therapy.” 

“What happened to you!” May bustled forward and dragged Daisy to the couch where she and Darcy promptly dropped her. It was eerily familiar to his own reception earlier. 

Daisy winced. “I may have been shot a couple of times.” She held up a hand and grinned. “But good news, the world isn’t going to be conquered by humanoid robots.”

Pietro paused as he processed that. “Someone made Ultron…..again?”


	17. Jane is Scary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm still riding a relieved high since yesterday.

Jane Foster was sort of calm. Did this count as her first kidnapping? First non alien kidnapping at least. She’d hit her panic button around the time she’d been hauled out of her favorite coffee shop and into a prius of all things. “You should really let me go.” 

“We know your boyfriend is in Asgard.” The bearded goon replied and his voice was meant to be cruel. “No one is going to save you.” 

She wondered at stupidity sometimes. But if they wanted to be dumb, why stop them? It wasn’t like they’d hurt any of her research. And Darcy did say she needed to get out of the lab more. “It’s your funeral.” 

“Gag her.” The goon driving the getaway car snapped. 

Jane glared and shoved herself up against the side of the car. “Don’t you dare! I have rights!” 

He slapped his hand over her mouth. She bit down. 

“FUCK!” 

And then the world went black. 

Jane woke up feeling groggy and disoriented. But she woke up. She winced at the light as she pushed herself up from the cold cement floor so that she was at least sitting. A warm hand settled on her shoulder. 

“Easy Dr Foster.” Ian’s familiar voice whispered. 

She blinked and let out a low groan, her right hand coming up to poke at what was going to be a fantastic black eye if it wasn’t already one. “Ian?” 

“They grabbed me on the way back from the Deli. Don’t worry, Darcy will save us.” Ian replied with all the faith of a man who’d seen Darcy and Tony whispering about ‘personal protection weapons development’ and who knew Darcy had Quake and Spiderman’s personal number. 

Jane was fairly nauseous, and was pretty sure she had a concussion of some fashion. “What do you know about our kidnappers?” 

“I think they’re AIM?” Ian threw a look at the door over his shoulder. “Nobody’s been in to check on us for at least an hour.” 

Jane looked around the room. Windowless concrete room, single hanging bulb, plastic bucket in one corner, folding chair in another. “Well, we’re going to have to plan our escape then.” 

“But we’re scientists!” Ian protested. 

She climbed to her feet, ignoring the twinges of soreness in her muscles. “We fought dark elves, I slapped Loki, I’m not sitting around for Darcy to save us from some fascist scientists who think they can kidnap us.” 

Ian blinked and then nodded. “Ok. What’s the plan?” 

“Is the bucket empty?” Jane considered there were no cameras in the cell. Whoever came in would be coming in blind. Excellent. 

He shuffled over and checked. “Yeah, do you need it?” His face heated up while cringing at the thought of her having to use the bucket for it’s clearly intended purpose. 

Jane groaned. “Grow up Ian.” She picked up the folding chair and snapped it closed. “We’re going to whack our captors.” 

“Oh, wait I don’t think the bucket will be a good weapon.” Ian picked it up and practiced swinging it unenthusiastically. 

She carefully stepped so that she’d be hidden by the door when it opened. “Alright, now we need to get them to open the door.” 

“Uh… I’m gonna have to scream a lot aren’t I?” Ian’s shoulders slumped. “This is the weirdest internship I’ve ever heard of.” 

Jane grinned, her teeth flashing. “Just think, three more years and you’ll be Darcy.” 

“No offence, but I don’t think any internship can create a Darcy. She was born terrifying.” Ian took a deep breath and then started screaming for help and a surprisingly broad tableau of profanity. 

It took two minutes for the door to open. Ian wheezed and chucked the bucket at the man coming in. 

Jane swung the folding chair with all of her weight over the man’s head. 

He crashed to the ground in a heap that didn’t so much as twitch. 

Ian lunged over the heap and tackled someone in the hall. 

Jane jogged after him, kicked the goon he was wrestling in the head. There was a cracking sound, hopefully it was just his jaw. No time to think about that. 

Ian hopped back up to his feet. “Now what?” 

“Check the one in the cell for weapons.” Jane crouched down and grabbed the taser off the guard at her feet’s waist. She paused as she felt the ground shaking. “Rescue party is here. Let’s go meet it.” 

Ian loyally stepped to her back holding his own recovered taser. “Right. But shouldn’t we wait for the rescue party to get to us Dr Foster?” 

“I want to bust in some prius windows.” Jane led them forward. “We didn’t even rate a murder van.” 

Three twitching AIM agents handcuffed to various fixtures and they got to a stairway out of the basement. Jane led them up the stairs, and they could hear the screaming and the vibrations were getting stronger. 

Ian laughed nervously. “Well we’re headed in the right way.” 

They stopped at the door out of the stairwell. Jane shared a look with Ian. “Ready?” 

“No? I really don’t want to die.” Ian whimpered slightly. 

Jane grabbed the door handle. “Feel free to stay here, but I’m going to go help make some AIM fascists regret their life decisions.” She flung the door open and stepped out shooting the first shape she spotted. A dark clad goon collapsing in a twitching pile.

“Hiya Doctor Foster!” Spiderman greeted as he went flying down the hall. He webbed the still twitching goon to the floor. 

Ian yanked her out of the way of a bullet, and then the goons bursting out of the door across from them went flying. He panted. “I need you alive to graduate!” 

Quake snorted as she walked past them, slightly worrying limp if you knew to look for it. “Darcy’s got the get away van if you want to start heading that way.” 

Jane glanced at the bullet holes. “We might need to make a tactical retreat.” She admitted. 

“Thank Thor.” Ian happily started pulling her back away from the chaos in the direction Spiderman and Quake had just left in. 

Jane had to admit the destruction marking the path towards the exit was impressive. “Do you think we should test to see if Quake can recreate the vibrational frequencies of a black hole?” 

“I don’t believe the world is ready for that yet Doctor Foster.” Ian replied. 

She patted his shoulder as they stepped through what had been ceiling to floor windows about ten minutes ago. Jane sighed as she saw Darcy sitting on the trunk of the prius, Ironman leaning against the car in full suit. The two were clearly arguing..something. 

Darcy popped off as soon as she spotted her. “Hey Janey!” She threw a look at the Iron Man suit. “Told you she was a terrifying tiny package of whoopass.” 

“I’ve been conned.” Ironman grumbled. 

Darcy ignored him carefully checking all of Jane’s injuries. Her eyes turned dark. “I hope you made them hurt for this.” 

“Of course.” Jane hugged her best friend. “Kind of surprised you weren’t kicking doors in there.” 

Darcy huffed, the irritation wafting from her. “Iron Dad is here to make sure I stay put.”

“Uh...the press is here?” Ian mumbled. 

Darcy reached out and patted his cheek. “Don’t worry, the whole Stark bastard thing is already half way leaked.” She looked up and down Ian. “Good job protecting Janey.” 

“You two are ridiculous.” Jane relaxed, she was safe. She could worry about the whole kidnapping bullshit in therapy tomorrow. 

////

Daisy hopped up on the counter next to Wanda. “So, why didn’t I know you missed food from your home?” 

“I assumed you knew.” Wanda looked at her friend curiously. “Doesn’t everyone miss the food from their home?” 

Daisy absently picked up a potato. “You have to have a home to be able to miss the food. Closest to home I've had is SHIELD and I wouldn’t say my feelings towards field rations are fond.” She shrugged. “So, need some help peeling those potatoes?” 

“Please.” Wanda reached out touching her arm. “You have a home now, with Peter, Darcy and May. I can feel your bonds with each other and that is what a home is.” 

Daisy slid to her feet and stepped to the sink and picked up a knife and began peeling. “Well, I suppose I should be even more sure to learn how to cook.” 

“You’re not that bad.” Wanda’s eyes sparked. “Well if you don’t try to just turn the heat up to make it cook faster.” 

She laughed. “It seemed logical at the time. And I made some perfectly edible mac and cheese last week.” 

“You’ve certainly improved.” Wanda flicked her fingers, a bowl floated out of the cabinets. 

Daisy watched the red lights as she peeled. “Your powers are quite beautiful you know.” 

“You underestimate your own.” Wanda smiled. “I was reading that air vibrates at different frequencies at different temperatures?” 

Daisy hummed, she’d been considering that application as well. “I’ve been considering attempting that. I’ll need Darcy’s help to get it right.” 

“Definitely wise, I’m not sure your idea of experimentation is in any way safe.” Wanda mixed the batter of some sort she was working on. 

“How’s Pietro settling in?” She picked up a new potato, there was something soothing about just sharing space and a task like this. 

Wanda flicked a red spark at her. “He is still recovering from being shot, unlike someone who went out into the field despite two bullet wounds.” 

“Hey now, those wounds were meant to disable, not harm me.” Daisy winked. “But also I was careful not to strain my injuries. I still have a good arm and leg. Besides I heal slightly faster than humans.” 

Wanda looked at her oddly. “Do you really?” 

“Not enough to be a power.” Daisy felt slightly uncomfortable at the mention of her inheritance from her mother. “Instead of six to eight weeks for a bone to heal it takes four to five for me. So it’s not impressive.” 

Wanda pointed her wooden spoon at her. “So you’re definitely breaking your doctor friend’s orders.” 

“I’m fine. I’ve fought in worse shape than this. I’m just glad I didn’t have to go straight into combat after waking from the Framework.” Daisy was deeply thankful for that. 

Wanda leaned against the counter looking at her with the expression that said she was learning far more than what Daisy was telling her. “What happened in the Framework?” 

“It was hell.” Daisy focused completely on the vegetable in her hand. “Hydra won, and in that world I worked for them.” She found herself talking then. More than she wanted to. “Darcy was dead in that world. She tased a Hydra officer who tried to arrest Jane for failing to report advancements in her work. Peter was on their watch list for dissent. But the worst...the worst part was the people who were alive because I never worked for SHIELD. Trip...he was alive, a hero.” 

Wanda laid a hand on her uninjured shoulder. “It wasn’t real.” 

“That’s the thing...it felt real.” Daisy didn’t mention the agony of being tortured in a Hydra cell. Of watching twisted versions of her team. In some ways she probably didn’t have to. 

“Is that why you can’t sleep?” Wanda asked quietly. 

Daisy looked at her friend. “My powers are fueled by pain. It makes nightmares inconvenient.” 

“I could help, but…” Wanda looked slightly uncomfortable, stepping back from her. “I would have to touch your mind.” 

Daisy caught Wanda’s hand. “I can’t...but it has nothing to do with you. Can you understand that?” 

“I do. But it should. I have violated people’s minds, your father’s even.” Wanda looked at the floor. 

Daisy squeezed Wanda’s hand. “It’s not the same. But even if it was they’ve forgiven you.” 

“I’m sorry, you’re the one who isn’t sleeping.” Wanda pulled away and went back to her batter. 

Daisy began to cut the freshly peeled potatoes, she could understand needing to let something go. And she knew she wasn’t the only one who regretted things they’d done. “It’s not so bad, there’s always caffeine. And I’ve been working on a program for detecting AI programs. Should work as a forewarning before another murder bot gets built. Not foolproof, but some warning hopefully.” 

“That would be reassuring. It’s...disconcerting that Tony is not the only one who is capable of making one.” Wanda scooped up the diced potato. 

Daisy downed the energy drink can. She crushed it between her hands with her powers, and then chucked it into a trash can. Pulling her legs up, she folded them under her and readjusted her laptop. Her program was coming along. She ignored her exhaustion, blinking till her eyes could focus on the screen again. An hour or two of dozing before she had her shift at the gym might work. “Self propagating replication maybe?” She murmured to herself.

////

Pepper sipped her mimosa. “It’s good to have female friends again.” 

“I imagine that’s difficult when in your position.” May Parker replied. And honestly the woman looked rather exhausted. 

Pepper looked at her friend in concern. “What’s going on?” 

“Darcy and Peter went to Michigan and got into a cross city shootout. Daisy went to check something out in LA and now she’s got two bullet wounds, has been beaten black and blue, she’s not sleeping.” May sighed. “And Darcy being announced as Tony’s daughter tomorrow? It’s just...it’s been a lot.” 

Pepper leaned forward and rested against the table slightly. “In my experience these things happen in waves. But you’re not the only adult they have in their corner. In fact I’m fairly sure that SHIELD team of Daisy’s is ready to swoop in at a moments notice if needed. Tony was having kittens about how he just got a smile and a thank you while Phil got a hug.” 

“That tracks.” May sipped her own mimosa. “But I don’t know how to help with all this…” She waved her hand as if to encompass the whole craziness that was their world. 

Pepper pushed the scone plate over. “It’s the price of loving people who are going to change the world.” She smiled and it felt sad. “You rarely will ever be able to help them. You will pick them up, patch their injuries, and send them back out there. Because they’re the type of people who see a brick wall and decide to run at it until the brick gives way. It’s why we love them. It’s admirable, inspiring to watch them even.” 

“People will always underestimate us.” Pepper continued. “Because we’re not the ones who change the world. But they won’t be able to change the world if they don’t have a safe harbor. So we love them, support them, and we smile and wave when they go out to run into those walls.” 

May was misty eyed. She sniffed. “I’m sorry it’s just… I promised I would take care of Peter. I have done my best and he’s such a good kid. But he’s fourteen. I’m supposed to protect him and instead he’s protecting everyone else. And now I have Daisy? Darcy at least has common sense even if it only exists so she can ignore it. But Daisy doesn’t even know how to ask for help.” 

“She came home to you. Twice now.” Pepper smiled gently at May Parker. “I don’t know Daisy, but that means a lot with Starks.” 

“They’re kids.” May picked up her mug of coffee, clearly done with mimosas. 

Pepper smiled. “Believe me, they’re lucky to have you. And it’s probably a terrible idea, but have you considered board games?” 

“Monopoly is already banned.” May raised a brow. “I can’t see Tony playing a boardgame.” 

Pepper snorted under her breath. “No, he attempted to use them as a part of seducing women a few times. He’s very competitive and turns into a pouting two year old if he loses.” 

“No offense, but I don’t understand what my sister saw in him.” May spread jam across her scone. 

She smiled. “None taken. He is a difficult man to love, but he can be very charismatic if he wants. That and for a chance at money or fame there will always be people.” 

“I don’t understand, but I do.” May sighed, shaking her head. “But then despite the girls’s meddling I’m not interested in pursuing someone. That likely makes me a poor judge of it all.” 

Pepper smiled at that, she’d heard Darcy chortoling over researching the cooking class in Queens with the highest proportion of ‘smoking’ men. “When you are ready for dating your partner is going to be the most vetted man in New York.” 

“It’ll certainly be something.” May took a bite of her scone. “So, I haven’t had an explosion in my house for two weeks?” 

Pepper felt like pinching the bridge of her nose. “Well, Tony and Darcy have started working on a lower cost version of an electric car. So less explosions, but the lab looks like a wrecking yard exploded. Apparently Dr Foster’s machines are all ‘certified non frankenbots’.” 

“I’m dreading the day they start portaling around the universe. Someday I’m going to come home to find out we have a pet bilgesnipe.” May just sounded resigned to her fate. 

Pepper felt a shiver of fear. “Aren’t those the giant Asguardian, horned, lizard monsters Thor brags about defeating?” 

“Yes, yes they are. Darcy was very excited to tell Peter all about Thor’s feats against them.” May and Pepper shared a look known only to those forced to suffer insane scientists. 

Pepper was weirdly glad that Tony hadn’t had a lot of time with Thor. “Have you considered getting a cat?” 

“Peter and I are allergic.” May seemed to consider it. “Or well Peter used to be allergic. I’m not sure if he still is.” 

Pepper enjoyed a bite of her quiche. Excellent food made dealing with Starks, powers, aliens, and whatever fresh crazy was happening easier. “I miss when things made sense.” 

“Cheers to that.” May lifted her coffee cup. 

Pepper clinked her mimosa flute against the cup. “Daisy goes to your cooking classes with you doesn’t she?” 

May hummed an affirmative while drinking her coffee. 

“And you go to your self defence classes with Darcy and Peter?” Pepper waited for May to nod curiously. “Do you do anything besides work without the kids?” 

May brushed some hair behind one ear. “The life of a single mom.” 

“I have an art show tonight. Why don’t you come with me? I can make sure a competent adult is there to babysit the kids.” Pepper offered. “It would be so nice to have someone I can actually talk to at one of these things.” 

May considered while chewing on her scone. “You think there’s an adult who won’t let them trample all over them?” 

“Bobbie Morse, she just started with SI.” Pepper was excited to have a woman working in her office. “She’s going to be part of my secretarial pool, mostly running my commitments with the labs while also being added security.”

May shook her head. “Darcy being known as a Stark is one thing, but even for someone vetted like that I can’t risk my kids.” 

“She’s Hunter’s wife.” Pepper assured. 

May stared at her for a long moment. “Hunter who was strong armed into stealing a jet and then everything in Michigan?” 

“He’s not the one who wears the pants. And Daisy actually is used to taking orders from her.” Pepper was delighted by that fact. Anyone a Stark listened to was worth their weight in gold to SI as far as she was concerned. 

May actually paused at that. “She doesn’t even listen to the director of SHIELD?” 

“I got the Quake stamp of approval when I hired Bobbie. It’s one night and Daisy should crash. She’s barely slept. And Darcy is still in the blueprint stage of a project.” Pepper was used to marshalling a Stark. 

May smiled finally. “Alright, I could use the night off. And maybe the kids need some time without me hovering.” 

“Excellent.” Pepper genuinely beamed. She wasn’t going to have time for a night out again for a long time once the rumors Darcy was a Stark were confirmed. It was nice to have a friend who understood. “Now how do you feel about smoked salmon?”


	18. May Considers Banning Caffeine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm a couple hours later than usual on the updates. I totally forgot.

Tony hovered just out of frame as Peter finished taking a photo of himself. He was aware of his kid’s snapchat account. It was actually pretty hilarious. When Peter slid the phone into the suit, he spoke up. “Hey kid.” 

“Mr Stark!” Peter whirled, and then pulled off his mask, big bright smile on his face. “Hey!”

He stepped out of the suit. “So a little sparkplug told me you like chemistry?” 

“Chemistry? I mean yeah I do.” He bounced slightly. 

Tony looked at the pool chairs and toys scattered around the roof. “Secret club roof?” 

“Uh, yeah I guess?” Peter’s fingers twitched. 

He’d have to like put an actual pool up here...or maybe just tell the kids they could use his pool? Still he’d come here for a reason. “So I was thinking, want to work on different types of webs for your super hero-ing?” 

“Yeah, that would be really cool. But you don’t have to do that Mr Stark.” Peter hopped up next to him. 

Tony looked at the kid and...god he was scared of the kid more than his daughters. His daughters weren’t going to put up with being fucked up. “I want to.” Which wasn’t that terrifying. 

Peter’s eyes practically sparkled. “Cool! So uh, are we going to do that now?” 

Tony looked at the set up they’d put together in the lab. “You changed the proline and tyrosine levels from natural spider webs. Interesting choice.” 

“Well they affect the structure, and the protein is important to dragline. But I needed it to be able to hold more weight than natural spider web strands do in nature. Or well some of them need to have more tensile strength, but most of mine I adjust the flexibility.” Peter looked up at him, slightly shuffled. “I mean it’s not that great...but it was the best I could do.” 

Tony reached out and patted the kid’s top head. It was...awkward. “You reproduced spider silk on a scale that nobody has. Good job.” 

“Really?” Peter perked up, his chest puffing slightly. 

His lips pulled up. “Yeah kid, you did good. Have you considered ricochet webs yet?” 

Tony chewed on his piece of licorice. “Have you and Spawn planned on working nanobots into the suit? We could make it more aerodynamic?” 

“We’ve talked about it. But I don’t want to get too caught up in gimmicks you know?” Peter looked up at him with big wide eyes filled with passion. “I mean Daisy can kick my ass with an arm in a cast and not using her powers. Or well she used to, now she probably would have to not be in a cast. But still. So I want to really master what I have. Ya know.” 

And god Tony didn’t want to fuck up this kid like his dad had fucked him up. Or Daisy’s..everything had fucked her up. The world had enough fucked up Starks. “You want to master your abilities and tools before learning new ones. In a few years you’re going to be a force to be reckoned with kid. You’re far more motivated than I was at your age.” 

“Really? But you already had graduated and were working for SI!” 

He winced. “Kid, believe me, you should be proud of yourself.” Tony suddenly grinned. “But you’re still a kid. Which means people can’t be mad at you for pranks for that long.” 

“Technically?” Peter’s face scrunched slightly as he clearly tried to figure out who he was about to be unleashed on. 

Tony dropped his hand down on the kid’s shoulder. “Rhodey hasn’t even met any of my spawn. My best friend. Your godfather.” 

“Does he even know about all three of us?” Peter asked slowly. 

He pushed through, it was an excellent idea. “You’ll get to bedazzle the War Machine suit.” 

“I’m so in!” Peter grinned right back at him. 

A throat cleared behind them. 

Tony and Peter both whirled around to come face to face with an amused looking Darcy. 

She arched a brow. “Betrayal in my own family. You’d start a prank war, use my own bedazzler and not even include me?” 

“It was Tony’s idea.” Peter casually threw Tony under the bus without a second thought. “Can we use the glitter?” 

Tony crossed his arms. “I see how it is.” 

“You can use the glitter, only if I get to help you use it on the Captain’s shield.” Darcy replied, a slightly deranged look in her eye. 

Tony was kind of touched, they were definitely his kids. “Well, I always wanted to see Cap look like a pretty, pretty princess.” 

////

Darcy yawned, a professional make-up artist was the only reason she didn’t look like she’d only gotten a few hours of sleep last night. She let herself settle. “So how off the rails do you think this is going to go?” 

“Completely.” Pepper replied without blinking. “Still ready to go through with it?” 

She huffed. “I’m here for the crazy train.” 

“Tony promised he thought this through.” Pepper brushed the front of her blazer. “So at least he won’t eat a burger or randomly give away a secret identity this time.” 

Darcy grinned. “I don’t think he ever had a secret identity.” 

Tony joined them while adjusting his cuffs. “My ears are burning ladies. All good things I’m sure.” 

“Keep telling yourself that Poprocks.” Darcy replied without so much as a twitch. 

He chuckled. “Well, we can’t keep the vultures waiting.” Tony strode out the doors to the prepared press conference. The reporters exploded with noise, photos being taken and questions. He came to a stop behind the podium. “Well hello there.” 

Darcy kept behind Pepper’s elbow, the perfect secretary. It was the easiest way to get her here. Besides the only photos were of her in full hipster gear and from a distance. She pointedly ignored how twitchy Hunter and Happy were acting as they stood stiffly in their bodyguard roles. All in all they were all there to fade into the background. Which wasn’t hard when Tony was...well he was Tony. 

Tony lightly held onto the podium. “So we’re here because some rumors have been going around about one of my employees. I’ve seen accusations that I’m stepping out on Pepper with an intern.” He looked at the reporters with a smug pout. “I happen to like my bits where they belong, so we should all be thankful that’s not true.” 

There were some polite chuckles at that. And god it was kinda horrifying that someone as painfully awkward as Tony was so good at controlling the press when he wanted. 

“Now the other rumors about the girl you all have some photos of me with is that she’s my daughter.” His lips pulled up. “Which is true.” Tony was stupidly smug as he looked out at the explosion of noise from the reporters. He held up a hand quieting the press. “As you all know I had a bit of a partying phase.” He laughed. “So I really shouldn’t have been so surprised when some DNA pinged my system.” 

“So yes, it’s DNA official, which considering how much she looks like me that would have been a bit redundant. Which leaves me to introduce the newest Stark. Dr Darcy Lewis, mechanical engineer, heir to all the Stark stuff and my daughter.” He waved his hand back bringing everyone’s attention to her. 

Darcy choked slightly. Heir? He made her his fucking legal heir!? She plastered on a smile though and stepped up next to Tony. As soon as this was over she was going to kill him. 

Tony grinned, his hand settling on her back. “And no we won’t be taking any questions at this time.” 

She was going to kill him with one of his own robots. It was the only fate worthy of this. Or maybe just tell Cap why he shouldn’t use his shower in the tower anytime soon. But then she wouldn’t see a Captain America with pink hair….she’d find a way to make Tony pay.

////

May added an extra sandwich to Peter’s backpack. “Peter you’re going to be late!” 

“Hey Aunt May, what do you think?” Peter slid into the kitchen. He was wearing a scarf that was...very puke green. 

She wasn’t sure how to put this. “It’s uh...is it cold enough for you to need a scarf?” 

“Is it bad? I just thought it would be good to wear colors that weren’t red and blue.” Peter touched the scarf nervously. 

May couldn’t let him go into public wearing a puke green scarf with sparkles. It just...she might not be ‘hip’ with the times but she was pretty sure that scarf was not going to help him. “Sweetie, maybe not that shade of green exactly.” 

“Is it that bad?” Peter pulled at one side of the scarf. 

She sighed. “It’s not a great look.” 

“Thanks Aunt May.” His shoulders slumped as he slung his backpack on with one hand and pulled the scarf off with the other. 

She leaned forward and kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry sweetie.” 

“Aunt May.” He grumbled, rubbing at his cheek. “I’m not a little kid anymore. I know you all call me a kid but I’m not.” 

May sighed looking at him, he was already taller than her. Not by much, but still. “I know, now go! You’re going to be late!”

“The bus!” Peter’s eyes widened in alarm and then he was out the door faster than a human should be able to move. 

May dropped her hands on her hips. “Baby steps. Baby steps.” She picked up the coffee pot and started filling her travel thermos. It was weird not to have to fight Darcy over coffee. But… crap. She walked as quietly as she could, it probably wasn’t that quiet, but still. 

She gently poked her head into Daisy’s room. May felt a pang as she saw Daisy. The girl was passed out on her desk. 

May walked over to the bed and picked up the Cap throw blanket off the bed. She padded towards Daisy and laid the blanket over the girl’s shoulders. It was telling that Daisy hadn’t startled. She let her hand rest on Daisy’s back, tiny vibrations spread from the touch all the way to her shoulder. It was sudden, one minute she was gently touching the girl’s back and the next there was an iron grip on her arm and cold eyes on her. 

Daisy released her and cringed backward. “May! What are you doing here?” 

“I was just checking on you.” May ignored the horror stricken look on Daisy’s face and gathered up the empty energy drink cans. “Why don’t you climb into your bed and get some more sleep?” 

“I...I can’t.” Daisy reached up and touched the fluffy edge of the blanket May had laid over her shoulders. Her face cracked, only to close up again. “You shouldn’t wake me like that May, I could have hurt you.” 

“But you didn’t.” May reached out and squeezed Daisy’s shoulder, ignoring how rigid the girl was under her hand. “Now try and get some sleep.

She slipped out and carefully shut the door behind her. May dumped the rest of the coffee in the pot down the sink as soon as she got back to the kitchen. Caffeine was clearly not the answer. 

May sorted through the new donations. “I don’t know how to help her.” 

“I think you already are doing what you can to help her.” Martin replied while folding a jacket. “We see it here all the time don’t we?” 

She looked at the rows of cots. Working at a FEAST homeless shelter meant she saw a lot of veterans. And she wasn’t unaware of the similarities. “She’d just been doing better. And now I don’t think she’s slept for more than two hours at a time in the last week.” 

“Until she asks for help there isn’t anything you can do.” Martin picked up another coat to fold. 

May looked up at her boss. “Thank you for listening to me.” 

“Anytime.” Martin smiled warmly. “But Peter’s doing well?” 

She picked up a pair of jeans from the donation box. “His team won their academic decathlon. He almost wore this hideous scarf to school today. And god I didn’t know if I could just say it was hideous?” 

“How hideous are we talking?” Martin’s face was amused. 

May couldn’t help a snicker. “Puke green, there were sequins.” 

“Oh no.” Martin snorted. “Being a teenager is rough. I remember some of the things I did to impress girls.”

May nodded. “I remember those days, I was in highschool in the late seventies. We got up to a lot of things.” 

“I do believe you owe me some stories next time I have time to come down here.” Martin took a step back. “But I’m afraid I have a call from Beijing I need to take. Have to be able to pay for all this somehow.” 

She picked up the box of the newest folded jackets. “It’s always good to see you Mr Li.”

“Ah! I had you saying Martin for a whole twenty minutes. I’m counting that as a win.” He laughed while pulling his phone out of his pocket and then frowning. “But I really have to go now. It’s been good to catch up.” 

May smiled at her boss, he was a good man. “Take care of yourself.” 

////

Wanda was curious as she climbed through Daisy’s window. Not that it was hard, she could fly. But it was odd. She bit back her instinctive wince at the dark circles under Daisy’s eyes. Instead she gently closed the window behind her. “Daisy, what’s going on?” 

“I need your help.” Daisy twitched slightly as she said that. She was sitting on the far end of her bed, legs curled under her. 

Wanda could feel the swirl of emotions all tightly reigned in. Without intruding, it was hard to parse out what they were, and Wanda respected that Daisy didn’t want her powers focused on her in that way. Explosions, wildly dangerous launching sure, nothing in her head. “What do you need? And why the window?” 

“I almost broke May’s arm today.” Daisy’s shoulders curled further inwards. “And I can’t trust myself to sleep here. I’d taken for granted we modeled my sleeping quarters off our containment facilities at SHIELD.” 

Wanda cautiously sat down on the bed, leaving room for Daisy’s jittery energy. Actually now that she was looking for it she could feel the air vibrating. It was a soft buzz filling the room. “You’re worried you’ll take the house down if you sleep?” 

“Think more New York dealing with an earthquake.” Daisy looked up. “Even in a containment unit when I had nightmares I nearly brought down an entire underground base. And that’s with people to wake me up.” 

And Wanda got it. She brought her own legs up, folding them under her. “You asked me to come through the window so the Parkers don’t realize how dangerous this could be?” 

Daisy nodded sharply. “I won’t hurt them.” 

“I know that.” Wanda had to resist reaching out and taking Daisy’s hand. It wouldn’t help. “You love them, they know that. I only feel echoes of it and I know that.” 

Daisy’s voice was surprisingly thick as she spoke. “In the framework...everything was wrong. I was Hydra. I hunted down, tortured and killed Inhumans. It was...to know that could have been me.” Daisy’s knuckles turned white. “I know what I’ll see if I let myself dream.” 

Wanda frowned. “Do you need me to be here to contain your powers while you sleep?”

“I…” Daisy trailed off before breathing in. She looked up, meeting her eyes. “I need you to make sure I don’t dream.”

Her mouth opened and then closed. Because that was… “You…” And she could feel resolve but also mind numbing terror from Daisy. Which suddenly made a horrible amount of sense. 

“My trauma isn’t more important than everyone's safety.” Daisy’s eyes were clear, her face determined. The clear exhaustion only slightly belayed that. 

And Wanda...she hesitantly reached out touching Daisy’s hand, ignoring the barely noticeable flinch as she made contact. “There must be other options? The tower has a room to contain the Hulk?” 

“I ran a simulation.” Daisy’s voice was just..exhausted. “I’d cause a 2.3 earthquake in the middle of manhattan. The safety measures on the room would prevent anyone from being able to get in to wake me for twenty minutes.” 

“Ah.” Wanda cast for another solution. Because she did not want to use her powers like that on someone who was terrified of them. She valued their friendship. It would be...it would be cruel. “Sleeping pills?”

Daisy shook her head. “Dendrotoxin or opioid blend with dissociative drugs. And non-sustainable.” Daisy’s lips pulled into a smile, though it was mirthless. “I’ve looked at the options and believe me, this isn’t something I’d ask lightly.” 

Wanda could feel how serious her friend was about this. And she wasn’t going to make her ask again. Daisy and her siblings had helped Wanda at every turn. She refused to stall at being asked for something without return for the first time since they’d met. “I will do it. But Daisy I can tell you’re terrified.” 

“It has nothing to do with you if that helps?” Daisy winced slightly. 

She raised her hands to the side of Daisy’s head. “Are you sure?” 

“I know you’re not going to hurt me.” And she meant it. “That doesn’t mean my head is going to be any more pleasant for you.” 

Wanda nodded and the red light of her powers curled around her fingers, and then sank into Daisy connecting them. Daisy’s eyes went red and then Wanda felt the chasoming pain, fear, love, resolve, kindness, loneliness, hate, and myriads of other emotions slam into her. This wasn’t the simple pulling of certain fears to the consciousness as she’d done to the Avengers. It was… far more delicate. Because she could feel the damage the one here before had done. 

She carefully, painfully carefully soothed the fear and guilt and other twisted up emotions. Not a lot, never completely. But enough she could pull something pleasant and warm forward. Wanda carefully eased the mind into sleep. Not that it was hard, the bone deep exhaustion barely needed a nudge from her. Wanda caught Daisy as she slumped forward, already unconscious. 

“I got you.” Wanda was careful, and grateful for her powers, as she managed to get Daisy into her bed. Which apparently Daisy sprawled when she was completely out. She carefully tucked in her friend. 

Wanda stood there. Now what? It felt...wrong to just leave her to sleep. She looked around the room...there were a lot of computer bits and pieces, but generally the room was pretty sparse. Did Daisy not read? Not a single book? She was going to need something other than what looked like a broken laptop. How good was she at lying? Time to find out. 

She made her way down to the kitchen. Wanda set the kettle on the oven and got two mugs out of the cabinets. 

“Oh I didn’t know you were here honey.” May smiled as she pulled out a packet of popcorn. “Is Pietro here?” 

Wanda just softened as she looked at May. “No, he’s reading bedtime stories over skype to the Barton kids.” 

“That’s sweet.” May was just so warm and genuine. “There’s some leftovers in the fridge if you want dinner.” 

She brushed it off easily. “I’ve already eaten, but thank you. I’m just going to need some tea and a book if I’m not going to fall asleep.” 

“Daisy have you helping with something?” May asked while leaning against the counter, letting the popcorn pop in the microwave. 

Wanda grabbed the box of tea. “Something about helping move the tiny parts of her new computer.” She stayed carefully calm. “I have a feeling I’ll be doing a lot of nothing.” 

“Ah, do you need a book?” May just looked amused. “And if you could curtail some of the energy drink consumption I’d be grateful.” 

Wanda’s lips pulled up. “I’ll do what I can. A book would be wonderful though.” 

“I hope you like romantic novels. It’s that or Peter’s comics and chemistry textbooks.” May’s head tilted slightly. “Or I think Darcy has some political science and historical texts somewhere?” 

Wanda huffed in amusement. “I’m beginning to think Starks are allergic to literature. The only one of the Avengers who reads is Natasha.” 

“Oh, what does the Black Widow read?” May asked.

She let her powers pull a book from the living room into the kitchen. “Depressing russian literature. Also depressing french literature. Your romance novels will be a good change of pace.” 

“Ah, the most dramatic and depressing of all books.” May pulled her popcorn out of the microwave. “Is there anything else you need?” 

Wanda shook her head. “I’m fine. Thank you though.” 

“Of course, it’s good to see you. Are you bringing Pietro with you to movie night tomorrow?” May asked, pausing in the entryway to the kitchen. 

She nodded. “I will, we’ll be a bit early, Pietro volunteered to teach Peter to make durney.”

“Well I for one am looking forward to whatever they produce.” May smiled warmly before leaving. 

Wanda sighed, that had gone surprisingly well. She was distracted by the kettle. She carried the two mugs of tea and the book back upstairs. Thankfully her powers were useful for carrying things. Closing the door behind her she looked at Daisy’s room. Well, at least that beanbag in the corner looked reasonably comfortable. 

Wanda jerked slightly as she heard a sound from the bed. “Daisy?” 

Daisy blinked blearily at her. Her face was scrunched slightly in confusion as she woke. “What… you stayed?” The confusion was so clear in her voice. 

She raised a brow. “Of course? You were scared, how could I just leave you alone?” 

“Oh.” Daisy blinked owlishly. 

Wanda set her book aside. “Why is your computer in pieces? It’s been bothering me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I noticed something kinda hilarious and totally accidental in this fic the other day. You know how the core of the Avengers are Tony, Steve, and Thor? I think I accidentally made mirrors of more successful version of them in the kids. Like Darcy is much more grounded Tony. Peter's an everyman turned superman who goes out there because they feel a responsibility to like Steve, and Daisy is certainly an alien force of nature like Thor. Only they're all slightly healthier versions. Like Peter in this hasn't been forced to lead or compromise his morals and thus is a much better able to be the emotional and moral center of the team. Daisy is much more successfully able to balance her responsibilities between her SHIELD family and her new family with the Parkers. She's also able to actually use her combat, strategy, etc training much more effectively with her siblings than Thor ever was with the Avengers. And Darcy...enough said. She's a much healthier Tony. Anyways I just thought that was a kinda hilarious thing to have happened.


	19. Reporters, Rebellion, and Espionage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup! Thanks for all the amazing comments, and I would just like to say this thing has gotten out of control long...so that should be fun for you guys. Meanwhile I'm beating my head against a keyboard going 'why do I do this to myself!'

Elizabeth Brant ignored the dirty look the Stark bodyguard was giving her. She wasn’t going to be scared off. In fact she would have clawed anyone’s eyes out who tried to get this scoop over her. Journalism could be a dog eat dog world. And the Stark scoop was hers! Did she lambast Everhart’s reputation with their boss? Yes, yes she did. But maybe Everhart shouldn’t have fucked Tony Stark. Credibility, you can’t send one of a man’s cast offs to interview his daughter. It’s bad form. 

She smiled as her freshly inspected bag was returned to her. Her smile was all teeth. This interview would further her efforts to become a household name. Another five years to build a reputation and then a nice cushy job on a daily news channel. She’d had her future mapped out since she was eight. Another year and she could look into marrying a pro-athlete. 

“Don’t forget the rules.” The bodyguard’s accent was distinctly british as he gave her one last glare, and then opened the door for her. 

Elizabeth brushed past him, as if she’d let him intimidate her. She took in the modern office she’d been brought to. Her cameraman had already set up, her sound man was attaching the mic to the newest Stark. She picked up her own mic and attached it to the lapel of her blazer. “Everything set up Mike?” 

“We’re all set, I was thinking of mostly using the natural lighting from the windows? It leaves the cityscape more visible behind both of you. I don’t know what these windows are made of, but the light is just lovely and diffused.” Mike’s eyes shone with the inner passion for lighting. He could babble about the topic for hours. Which wasn’t bad, he was her favorite cameraman for a reason. 

She held up her hand. “Now’s not the time. But if you think that’s the best lighting go with it.” Elizabeth took in the skyline out the floor to ceiling windows. It would be an evocative background. She plastered on a smile, one that was surprisingly genuine. “Dr Lewis.” 

“Ms Brant.” Dr Lewis took her hand and shook it. The woman was all casual confidence, classically attractive though she was downplaying it. 

Elizabeth noted the purple nailpolish, white oxford shirt under tie dye sweatshirt, washed out jeans, and sparkly blue glasses. “Are you familiar with how this is going to work?” 

“Absolutely not, but PR briefed me and I’m a child of the internet. Think I’ll be good.” And there was a smug light to the woman that was all Stark. 

Elizabeth laughed. “Well just relax, this is just a more intimate introduction than the press conference was yesterday.” 

“I’m sure.” Dr Lewis’s eyes twinkled with mirth. 

She felt a thrill, someone who wasn’t going to need their hand held. Intelligent people were always more exciting to interview. And honestly gave better content. “Do you have any questions for before this starts?” 

“No, I’m sure the legal forms you signed about covered it.” Lewis rocked back on her heels. “I’m ready when you are.” 

“Well, let’s get started then shall we?” Elizabeth politely waved them towards the carefully set up chairs in front of the windows. 

There was a quick round of final mic checks, Mike adjusting everything so they were properly in frame. And then the camera began rolling. 

Elizabeth smiled as she started speaking. “Hello, today I’m here with Dr Lewis the new heir to Stark Industries and newly revealed daughter of the famous Tony Stark.” She turned to Lewis. “First thank you for letting us speak with you so soon after the momentous announcement Dr Lewis.” 

“Of course, I’m happy to be here.” Lewis smiled and it didn’t feel fake, more mischievous than anything else. “It was a bit inevitable once I found out who my bio-dad was.” 

She made an appropriate noise to that. “I have to start with what everyone is wondering, how did you find out?” 

“My first day working at Stark Industries.” Darcy rolled her eyes. “Tony burst into the lab looking like he was having kittens. The Stark medical check all employees undergo involves DNA being run for hereditary issues and the system pinged the relation.” 

Elizabeth leaned in ever so slightly. “You’d had no idea before that, not a single suspicion?” 

“Not really, I knew my mom had a bit of a party phase. Guess she and Tony had that in common.” Darcy shrugged carelessly. “It wasn’t as big of a shock as it could have been.” 

Elizabeth would personally eat her notepad if the girl hadn’t practiced similar questions with Stark’s PR department. “So you had no idea, it was just your first day at Si?” 

“Nope.” Darcy’s smile was fairly bland if her eyes weren’t so damn amused. 

Elizabeth leaned back in her chair. “So you were brought into SI as a mechanical engineer on the Rosen Eisen Bridge project led by Dr Foster? Her theories of course being validated by Thor and the observed portals since then.” 

“Yeah, Janey and I go way back to my undergrad.” Darcy beamed, genuine excitement plain to see on her face. “I interned for her my senior year at Culver. And well nothing makes a lasting impression so much as surviving an alien encounter together. That and late night margaritas.” 

Elizabeth nodded along. “The documents leaked from SHIELD indicated that you were at the New Mexico event as well as in London during the invasion there?” 

“Yeah, I mean it started out with Jane trying to drive us into a space tornado in the middle of the desert and now where goes Jane, so goes my nation ya know?” Darcy waved her hands in a ‘what can you do’ gesture. “And now that I’ve got my doctorate and she lets me do more than duct tape her equipment, we have 70% less explosions and or fires in the lab.” 

She knew future interviews would probably focus on all the topics she intended to brush past. But right now she needed the full picture. It was what would get her the traction. “Speaking of your doctorate, you had an unusual path to your degree?”

“Yeah, the science classes I was in were either boring or I got brushed off. I mean I know I don’t look like a mechanics nerd, but still.” Darcy crossed her legs. “But after New Mexico I applied for some graduate courses on the subject and got in. And well, I guess it’s kinda history now. My first patent sold, the work I’m doing with Jane is supes cool, and I still have my own projects on the side.” 

“Your projects on the side, that includes working with heroes like Spiderman and Quake? You were involved in the shootout in Lansing Michigan afterall.” Elizabeth prodded. 

Darcy snorted. “Yeah I help out Spiderquake. They’re fun and only patently ridiculous 20% of the time.” 

“How did that come about? And connected to that are you planning on following in your father’s footsteps?” 

She shook her head with a laugh. “Definitely not. I don’t mind tasing an alien, AIM agent or corrupt cop here or there when I get dragged along on crazy adventures. Which Lansing was ridiculous and I’m never letting Spiderman convince me he just needs a ride to go save a reporter friend ever again. I don’t know how he does it with those goggles but the puppy eye power is real.” 

“No Iron Maiden in your future then?” Elizabeth knew if she played this right she could get more access. More access, more name brand value, and one step closer to her ultimate goals. 

Darcy pushed her glasses up her nose. “Yeah not gonna happen. Tony might like flying around in a tin can with a sparkly ass, but so not my style. I’m happy to help backend with people who actually know what they’re doing. I’d just be flying by the seat of my pants and that’s not a good look on anyone.” 

“But you do support the Avengers and other heroes like them?” Elizabeth could feel her career progressing. Nothing too hard hitting, just highlights right now. Highlights and she could get to the real meat in future interviews. 

Darcy nodded. “I do, I think they do real good in the world and that measurably there are millions of people still alive because of their efforts. And that’s that we can know. Which before you ask I do support some of the legal measures around accountability. But I think we have to be incredibly careful that we don’t go too far. Just look at the legal and moral issues we’re having to face with our own government’s involvement with the illegal actions in Lansing? Or General Ross who almost was put in a position of power over vulnerable individuals. It’s incredibly complicated.”

“I agree with Tony and his approach of working with both lawyers, members of our government, and enhanced individuals to craft a basis of law that protects all citizens. Because this is the weird world we live in now and that’s not going to change. Burying our heads in the sand and letting atrocities happen isn’t a solution.” Darcy was clearly passionate. Her genuine belief would play well on camera. “I really think that is why court cases like the upcoming prosecution of James Barnes are going to be important to watch. It’s going to be a test case in how our courts can handle the frankly impossible.” 

Elizabeth resisted the urge to pull that thread, too much. “So you agree Barnes should be tried in a court of law?” 

“Of course.” Darcy replied easily and sure of herself. “He’s an American citizen. As such he has a right to a jury of his peers, for the evidence to be laid out measured and a verdict found. Being extraordinary shouldn’t place anyone above the law. It also doesn’t make someone any less of a citizen of his country.” 

She felt the slightest spark. “So you will be involving yourself with the legal side of SI then?” 

“That was an accident really.” Darcy sighed. “The Avengers didn’t have a PR team. Which is ridiculous, but I spent a week bullying legal and Tony about it. So hopefully now that the Avengers do have a PR team, and the whole Stark thing is all settled with legal I’ll be free of that headache. I’m much more suited to just building cool toys in the lab.” 

Elizabeth pounced at the opportunity to keep leading this away from the dicey waters of the enhanced and the upcoming Barnes trial. “But you are the heir to a controlling interest in SI. Heir to one of the largest business empires in the world. Surely you have plans besides just building things in the lab?” 

“Not really?” Darcy shrugged. “Tony forgot to mention he was making me his heir.” She looked genuinely annoyed for a second. “So that was fun to find out.” The sarcasm was definitely thick. “I mean it’s nice not to be in debt from college. But really I’m not an expert in the company.” 

Elizabeth couldn’t help the slight disbelief. “So no plans to take more of an interest in what will someday be your company?” 

“I guess? But honestly right now I’m happy where I am and with what I’m doing. And Ms Potts is doing a fantastic job. I don’t know enough to want to rock the boat. Besides, Tony’s still young enough he could have another kid or something and I can pass the whole thing off to them.” Darcy’s lips twitched up. 

She turned the pen in her hand over. “So you approve of Ms Potts? There have been a lot of rumors and talk surrounding her promotion to CEO of Stark Industries.” 

“She’s the most highly competent woman I’ve ever witnessed. Like life goals of awesome.” Darcy looked slightly starry eyed. “I don’t know what she sees in Tony to be honest, she could do better. But if he makes her happy.” She shrugged, ignoring how every person in the room was choking at that. “She’s essentially been running the company for Tony since he hired her as his assistant. I mean I don’t think he even knows his own social security number.” 

Elizabeth had definitely not been expecting that, or Darcy willingly expressing her opinions on enhanced. “So no resentment that your father is involved with a woman who’s not your mother? No possibility of a reconciliation there?” 

“Thor no!” Darcy laughed outright. “Please, my mom is happily married and honestly she and my step-dad are great together. They’ve progressed to two lammas to deal with the empty nest syndrome since I left. I’m not even sure either my mom or Tony actually remember their whole fling. And I really don’t want to know.” 

Elizabeth had done her research. Margaret Lewis was a small town dentist married to the local vet. Everything about them was pretty scandal free. So she pushed forward. “I notice you’ve been calling your dad Tony?” 

“Well yeah?” Darcy smiled. “He’s cool, and we’re getting to know each other over rebuilding old cars and converting them to electric. But it’s all kinda new, to both of us. We did dye Steve’s hair pink the other day though. So you know, it’s going.” 

Elizabeth stilled. “You dyed Captain America’s hair pink?” 

“He should check what’s in his shampoo bottle before he uses it.” Darcy’s face had a wicked grin. “You should def get him to take off those ridiculous hats he’s been wearing in public. It’s spectacularly hot pink.” 

////

Peter whooped as he went flying over a shorter building. There was nothing as exhilarating as the swooping sensation of swinging through the city. It was excellent! As he was sailing through the air he spotted a streak of color. 

Landing on the side of a building he looked over. And yup that was a red banner with his Spiderman mask printed on it. He blinked, there was a person sitting next to it. That was… that screamed trap. He hopped off the building and did a circuit of the block. No snipers, or anything out of place that he could see. So maybe not a trap? 

He was going to do the dumb thing. He’d be fine. So what if Daisy was too injured to shadow him much right now. Peter trusted his instincts as he came shooting up the side of the building, and then landed on the roof. He recognized the woman. “Detective Watanabe?” 

“Oh good.” The detective started folding the banner. “Sorry about the banner, but I wasn’t sure how to contact you and Quake.” 

Peter straightened up. “Did you need help?” 

“I do need your help.” Watanabe dropped the folded up banner. “You and Quake have been willing to at least work with the police sometimes.” She ran a hand through her hair. “Should we wait for Quake?” 

Peter set his hands on his hips, trying to stand at his full height. “I could help? Quake’s busy right now. So what do you need, Detective?” 

“Just call me Yuri.” She crossed her arms. “I have a theory and I need backup or people are going to get hurt.” 

He frowned slightly. “But don’t you have like a cop partner? Or like call back up on the radio? Like blue brotherhood, the whole thing? I mean that’s what movies say.” 

“I turned in my partner for taking bribes.” Yuri raised a brow. “I don’t get back up now.” 

“Oh...OH! That’s terrible.” Peter cringed. 

Yuri just gave an exhausted sigh. “It is what it is. But what’s important right now is that New York has a werewolf.” 

“What?” Peter laughed. “You had me going there.” He paused… “Oh you’re serious. Like with the fur and like all ‘rawr’.” He held up his hands like claws. 

She brandished a folder. “The last six fullmoons there have been animal attacks. The precinct thinks it’s a serial killer. But I found some images off an atm.” Yuri opened it aiming it towards him. 

And yup that was def a man shaped wolf. “Oh wow. Really?” 

“And I can’t find any records of any similar crimes in a six county radius during any point of the month. We only have maulings on the full moon. And look at the coroner’s report.” Yuri pressed the folder into his hands. 

He felt his eyebrows climbing against the face of his mask as he looked at it. This was actually really serious, and oh so gross. But...it was just one badguy? Peter looked up at the detective. “So uh...what’s the plan?” 

“Well I’ve mapped out the attacks. If we patrol Brooklyn and keep an ear out on the radio we should be able to find something. Once that happens I’m going to need enhanced support to bring it in.” Yuri winced. “We don’t know if the werewolf is even aware they’re doing this. So I’d prefer non-deadly options and between your webbing and Quakes well quakes it should be possible.” 

Peter could handle a werewolf without Daisy. Prove he could handle everything, that they didn’t need to protect him and treat him like a kid. “So like meet up here at like five before the next full moon?” 

“You’ll do it?” Yuri looked surprised, and then she eagerly kept talking. “Of course that works. I can check out some communication equipment so we can coordinate sweeps.” 

He nodded, bouncing closer. “Yeah, that sounds good. We’ll totes catch him!” 

Peter waived as he got home. “I’m home!” 

“Sup.” Daisy was wearing her gym polo, leaning over the kitchen island, flipping through a magazine. “Anything exciting out there?” 

He felt slightly sweaty. “No, just the usual. Helped Mrs Rodrigaz with her groceries again.” 

“Get treed by her dog?” Daisy’s lips were pulled up slightly in amusement. 

Peter rolled his eyes. “That only happened once.” 

“Yup.” She winked. 

He cocked his head to the side. “You look a lot better.” 

“Yeah, got some actual sleep last night.” Daisy had an odd expression on her face before shaking herself slightly. “Darcy called, she’s staying at the tower tonight, her interview is airing and doesn’t want to accidentally drag the reporters here.” 

Peter frowned. “But we set up a backstory so it doesn’t look weird that she spends time here?” 

“Yeah, but it’s the biggest story right now.” Daisy tossed a granola bar at him. “Once it’s just like a page four story we’ll cross that bridge.” 

He shrugged, it was Darcy’s thing. “So what’s for dinner?” 

////

Natasha slid onto the bench. Her hands were in her jacket pockets as she looked at the various civilians walking through the park. It was bustling and oddly peaceful. “So you took a job with Stark?” 

“Mission went wrong in Europe.” Bobbie replied while sipping her latte. “And the health insurance was appealing. Not all of us have enhanced healing factors.” 

Her mouth twitched. “Touche.” She relaxed as much as she ever did in public. “It’s good to see you.” 

“It was close after the evil squids showed their hand.” Bobbie raised her latte at Nat. “Good on you stopping the helicarriers.” 

Natasha gave a single blink. “I’m sorry you got caught in the fallout.” 

“I get it. A heads up would have been nice.” Bobbie raised a brow while sipping from her drink. 

She watched a teenager playing frisbee with his dog. “Couldn’t know you weren’t a squid.” 

“Yeah, they really suck like that. Next squid hunt you and the Captain go on let me know. I have some issues I could use working out.” Bobbie’s voice held clear anger. 

Natasha couldn’t blame her, she had some anger issues when it came to Hydra herself. “I’ll let you know.” She enjoyed the fresh air. “So what do you think about your husband’s new job?” 

“Oh he’s being driven to distraction.” Bobbie chuckled. “But you’re asking about the new power trio?” 

She nodded, no point beating around the bush. “They are all very powerful in their own ways.” 

“I don’t know the kid, or Darcy very well. Lance’s complained a lot.” Bobbie’s voice was amused.

“But you’ve worked with Johnson.” Natasha replied. 

Bobbie hummed. “She’s talented, Melinda was training her. I hear you got to spar with her?” 

“She’s good, could use more experience and work.” Natasha didn’t need to mention that Quake’s powers made her terrifying as a possible opponent. Highly trained specialists with powers on that scale should make people nervous. 

Bobbie curled her hands around her paper cup. “She’s good. Being a superhero suits her more than being an agent did I think. If she’s training the spider kid he’ll be a good egg.” 

“And the wealth and political power they’re building up?” Natasha asked. 

Bobbie hummed. “They aren’t being subtle about what their goals are. I had a few beers with Darcy and Daisy the other night. I doubt there’s a secret plot.” 

“They’re changing how we’re perceived.” Natasha trusted Bobbie Morse as much as she could considering their field of work. “Steve’s distracted by everything involved with Bucky.” 

Bobbie nodded. “Yeah, that’s going to be a media shitshow as the court date comes up.” 

“You’re part of the security detail for the court.” Natasha didn’t envy that. Not that she wasn’t going to be at the trial. The things she did for Steve. 

Bobbie actually cringed. “I only pray Hogan isn’t involved at all. He’s loyal but..” 

“Under qualified for his current position.” Natasha finished for her. She wasn’t a fan of Tony’s former driver. But she understood it, the man was surrounded by leeches and Hogan for all his faults wasn’t that. “But you trust Johnson?” 

Bobbie sipped at her drink. “I do, she’s dependable. And is anything they’re doing you disagree with?” 

“Not yet, I haven’t seen anyone reign in Tony as effectively as Darcy has. It’s impressive. It makes me reconsider how the Avengers were managed.” Natasha would have to discuss it with Clint later.

Bobbie laughed under her breath. “I’m learning Darcy Lewis is a force of nature. And Daisy is one, literally.” 

“Things are certainly changing.” Natasha agreed. 

Bobbie finished off her drink. “I don’t know about you but I’ll be helping their version of the future. I can agree to consequences for everyone, including the government.” 

“That's certainly refreshing.” Natasha stood up. “Good to see you again Morse.”


	20. Wanda Gets a Clue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know about you guys but tis the season for some pouring rain.

Daisy flowed through her morning tai chi. “Keep your arm up.” 

“How are you not in pain?” Pietro grumbled from where he was following her movements. 

She was healing, another week and she’d be able to help Peter in the field more. It was becoming noticeable she healed faster than humans. Bullet wounds didn’t heal at the same rate as broken bones. She lowered her arms coming out of her stance. “If you’re in pain we should stop.” 

“I can keep going.” He disagreed. 

Daisy patted his shoulder. “You’re doing good. Dr Cho did good work on you, for nearly being swiss cheese over half a year ago, the fact you’re getting back into shape already is impressive.” 

“You were shot a week and a half ago.” He picked up a towel and wiped his sweat away. 

Daisy shrugged. “Not human, and they avoided hitting anything vital or the joints themselves.” 

“I’m powered by an infinity stone.” He picked up his water bottle and took a long drink. 

She smiled while pulling on her sweatshirt. “Inhuman.” Daisy pulled out her phone checking that no one had messaged her. “And you should really work on flexibility.” 

“I’m fast.” He gave a challenging smirk. 

Daisy chucked her towel at his head. “And clearly cannot dodge.” 

“That hurts.” He dropped both of their towels down the chute. “Why am I the only one suffering your morning workout regime?” 

Daisy held the door open for them. “Because we’ve both been shot. And Tony hired his physical therapist based on cup size not competence.” 

“I thought he’d improved since he became involved with Potts?” Pietro frowned. 

She walked towards the gym showers. “He hired her while they were on a break.” Which… she needed to talk to Tony. 

“I do not understand how you and the others are related to him.” Pietro paused as they reached the respective locker rooms. 

Daisy rocked back on her heels. “I don’t know, there are more similarities than I expected.” 

Daisy pulled her hood down as she made her way into the lab. Slipping her phone into her pocket she sighed. Eventually she was going to have to select one of the therapists she’d been running background checks on. Still, she’d reached her destination. She paused as she looked at the green energy car. It was...well it looked like a spaceship from the future. Still, she picked up a knut and tossed it at Tony’s head. 

“Hey!” He jerked out of his mechanical fugue state. He spun in outrage only to seemingly pause as he recognized her. “Daisy?” 

She raised a hand. “Sup Poprocks.” 

“Did you just call me Poprocks?” He looked kind of baffled. 

Daisy hopped up onto the workbench, letting her legs swing off the edge. “Well yeah, or was that a Darcy only nickname?” 

“No, I just...wasn’t expecting that. I mean I know how amazing I am, but you know…” He waved his blueprints away absently. 

She considered the man who was her biological father. “You dropped everything to help me, to help SHIELD. Mace would have died if you and Darcy hadn't been there. Who knows how much damage Aida could have done if she’d managed to give herself a biological body. And you just did it.” 

“Didn’t you get the memo? I’m this thing called a ‘superhero’, it’s kind of in the job description.” He brushed off. 

Daisy shook her head. “It means a lot. And as someone in the ‘superhero’ club we don’t have to do this.” 

“Is this a heart to heart kid? Cause I really don’t do those.” Tony actually looked like he was trying to figure out to escape out of his own lab without looking ridiculous. 

She huffed. “I think this means I want in on the Avengers prank war.” Daisy held out her paintball gun. “And I have some ideas.” 

“Huh, how do you feel about a coordinated attack on the super spy herself?” Tony asked. 

Both of Daisy’s eyebrows rose towards her hairline. “I enjoy not being dead.” 

“Lame, but we can work with that.” Tony’s smug grin filled his face with boyish glee. “FRIDAY, bring up Operation Pretty Pretty Princess!” 

Daisy snickered, she had a feeling that name had Darcy’s fingerprints all over it. “So Sam is next up?” 

“Well with team Cap in the tower for once the opportunity of a lifetime is available.” Tony rubbed his hands together. 

She smiled, while slipping Darcy’s prototype of a taser handcuffs into her back pocket. Multitasking, the best way to get things done. “Have you considered turning our opponents' revenge against each other?” 

“Miss information campaign?” Tony’s eyes lit up. “I like how you think Offspring.” 

////

Darcy threw up her hands as her latest prototype started smoking. “I GIVE UP!” 

“Hmm…” Jane mumbled while scribbling away at the whiteboard. 

She grabbed the prototype and whacked it against the workbench. “No I’m done. Fuck it. I’m going to go get coffee. You want anything bosslady?” 

“Hmm…” Jane didn’t even twitch towards her. 

Darcy glared at her best friend. “No fancy drink for you.” 

“Huh?” Jane looked at her, glazed over quality to her eyes. “Did you say something Darcy?” 

“Nope.” Darcy picked up a pop tart and shoved it into Jane’s hand. “Feed thyself.” She turned on her heel and marched towards the elevator. Fancy coffee from the lobby was calling her name. And not Thor, not Freya herself was going to stop her. Which was why when the elevator slowed and opened she was considering murdering the individual who had delayed her destination. 

Only it was Steve Rogers who stepped in. He gave a polite nod. “Ms Lewis, I was hoping to have a word if you don’t mind?” 

“It’s Doctor, and I don’t mind if you pay for the coffee.” She couldn’t help her amused twitch as she got a good look at the hot pink hair of freedom up close. “The pink suits you.” 

Steve reached up touching his hair ruefully. “I can pay for the coffee Dr Lewis.” 

“Then we’ll be just fine Cap.” Darcy accepted the delay and conversation. First hand visuals of the pink hair of freedom and free coffee went a long way. 

Steve looked ever so slightly amused. “I’ve found myself regretting underestimating you Dr Lewis.” 

“And don’t you forget it.” She gave a cocky grin. “So what did ya need to talk about Cap?” 

He ran a hand through his hair. “I was wondering what it’d cost to buy your assistance in getting revenge on Tony for the glitter shield.” 

“Joining in on the prank war. Interesting move.” She examined the good Capsical. 

Steve’s mouth pulled into what might even be considered a grin. “I’m a soldier not a saint. And with the trial, Bucky needing the Tower’s hulk room and medical facilities I’m going to be stuck living with Tony for months.” 

“You’re in luck. Poprocks failed to tell me he was making me his heir. Revenge is sweet, and I’ve been told I’m excellent at it.” Darcy held out her hand. “I’m in.” 

Steve actually laughed at that, but he took her hand and shook it. He gallantly gestured for her to lead the way as the elevator doors opened. “So do you have any ideas? Because I have quite a few.” 

“Well for the best ideas we’d need Quake’s help.” Darcy waved off his confusion. “She’s a hacker. But since I doubt she’ll turn that easily I have a secret weapon, I know where she keeps the viruses she wrote specifically to delay the Iron suit if need be.” 

Steve held open a door for her. “She has pre-prepared viruses to be used against the team?” His face went all serious. 

Darcy laughed outright. “Unless the Iron suit doing the polka while blasting the classic music ‘Peanut Butter and Jelly Time’ is nefarious I think you can unclench my dude. I said delay not incapacitate. Also I bet I can sweet talk FRIDAY around to letting me change up some paint jobs.” 

“Neon blue.” An unholy light lit Steve’s eyes. “I want his suit neon blue, bright red with stars. And glitter. Do you think we can do that? Like the flag threw up on him.” 

Darcy bit the inside of her cheek to keep from cackling. “Had enough patriotic jokes?” 

“You have no idea.” Steve replied seriously. 

She nodded, she could see it. Afterall she definitely got the snark honestly. “I can see what we can do. But have you considered patriotic tutu and winged eyeliner on the suit?” 

“Doctor, if i was not already committed I’d propose marriage to you for that suggestion.” Steve intoned with a sort of malicious reverence. 

Darcy gave the man a second look. “You’re a troll at heart aren’t you?” She nodded. “You may be my pranking husband. As pranking husband you may call me Darcy.” 

////

Wanda was content as she sat, half curled against her brother’s side, her head laying on his shoulder. He kept grumbling, as if he wasn’t going to end up crying by the end of the movie. It’d been May’s turn so they were watching Pride and Predjudice. It was comfortable and just the whole room felt like home. Also this couch was really comfortable.

“I wish we still danced like this.” May sighed into her large glass of wine. She was comfortably curled in the armchair. 

Daisy, who looked like she was about ten minutes from falling asleep spoke up from the couch, her voice slurring slightly. “I can dance suuuuper good. Waltzzzing and tango and sssshit.” 

“People still dance like that?” Peter asked from where he was buried under blankets and fiddling with his web shooters. They were all pretending they weren’t aware he was fiddling with the web shooters. 

Daisy made an affirmative hum. 

“Rich assholes dance formally, and swing dance is back.” Darcy reached over and pulled Daisy’s blanket up higher on her sister as she replied. Darcy’s hair was still poofy from her transportation via Quake flight...a supremely unpleasant experience. But pretty untrackable. 

“It seems overly complicated.” Wanda was relieved to see Daisy looked far more solid and put together than she had when she’d seen her last. And she was weirdly grateful Daisy hadn’t indicated she wanted assistance to sleep again. 

Pietro huffed, he looked down at her pointedly. 

She zapped him with a flick of her fingers. 

He jolted. “Ow! Where is your respect? I’m twelve minutes older you know?” 

“Children!” May chided from the armchair. 

“Sorry Aunt May.” Wanda settled back against Pietro. She did have a question still. “This is not how I remember this movie. Wasn’t Kiera Knightly playing the lead role?” 

Peter let out a groan. 

May looked over at her. “That’s the newest version. But Colin Firth is the best Darcy.” 

“Boo! Mcfadyen is the Darcy who makes me want to smoosh another Darcy.” Darcy stuck her tongue out at May. 

Peter slumped further into his blanket nest. He looked rather like he wanted to die. 

May looked surprisingly sly. “He wasn’t the one your mother was thinking of when she named you.” 

“I pre-date the Firth version.” Darcy crowed. 

Pietro’s nose scrunched. “I thought Darcy was a man's name? And you are very much not a man.” 

“Eyes up pretty boy.” Darcy snarked. “And my mom was on the good stuff when I came into the world.” 

Wanda let her powers swirl around her fingers in warning for her brother to shut up. She was enjoying the movie thank you very much. 

Wanda pressed a hand to Pietro’s back. “I’ll be back.” 

“Don’t take too long.” Pietro passed a freshly cleaned plate to Peter. 

She smiled as she watched the boys working their way through the dishes. “Have fun brate.” 

Wanda made her way up the stairs. She knocked on Daisy’s partially open door. “Daisy?” 

“Come on it.” Daisy called. 

She stepped in, closing the door behind her. Wanda raised an eye as she saw the various bits and pieces of machinery everywhere. “What on earth?” 

“I was thinking about what we talked about before you did your mumbojumbo on my head.” Daisy looked up from where she was doing something to metal bracelets? “Thanks for that by the way. Sleep really helped.” 

Wanda hesitated. “What are you doing building things? Isn’t that more Darcy’s thing?” 

“Typically, but she’d be opposed to this for dumb reasons so we’re not telling her.” Daisy snapped what was apparently handcuffs not bracelets around her wrist. She snapped both cuffs onto the same wrist. 

She stepped closer. “Is there a reason you’re putting one of your arms in handcuffs?” 

“They’re designed for inhumans, one shot tasing if the heart rate goes above resting. My powers when triggered by pain cause my heart rate to spike. If I have a nightmare it’ll wake me.” Daisy lifted the blankets showing the contraption she’d apparently attached to the underside of her bed. “And that’s one of Darcy’s prototypes. It dampens vibrations.” 

Wanda held out her hand. “Want to explain this from the beginning?” 

“You mentioned the hulk room.” Daisy accepted the hand up. “Which won’t work. But the prototype should dampen my quakes till the taser wakes me up.” 

She thought that one through. “Tasing yourself can’t be healthy?” 

“Well it’s not ideal. But I need a short term solution that isn’t asking you to knock me out every night.” Daisy actually seemed fairly calm and practical about the whole thing. “I’ve gone through withdrawal from mind powers before. No thanks.” 

Wanda softened slightly, it was still crazy, but she could see the logic. “Not that my powers are a good option, but hurting yourself isn’t either.” 

“It’s a stopgap.” Daisy brushed her hair behind one ear. “I found a therapist, and from experience the night terrors become manageable with time. But time isn’t exactly safe for everyone else.”

She looked at the other woman in surprise. “You are going to go to therapy?” 

“I’m full of surprises.” Daisy grinned. “And I can’t be who I need to be if I’m the biggest danger.” 

Wanda sighed. “Alright, I’ll keep quiet about all of this. But if you get tased three nights in a row will you let me help you?” 

Daisy hesitated for a split second before nodding. “I do trust you Wanda. Thank you, I know my head couldn’t have been a fun place to be.” 

“The person who was in your head before, they left a lot of damage.” She frowned. “I don’t know if I could fix it.” 

“It’s healing.” Daisy felt tired as she said that. “Shouldn’t you and speedy boy be heading back to the tower?” 

Wanda rolled her eyes. “We’ll leave soon.” She sat down pointedly on the foot of Daisy’s bed. “I wanted to thank you for working with Pietro. He grumbles, but he is happy to be doing something again.” 

“He’ll be using his speed again soon enough.” Daisy smiled and joined Wanda on the bed. “I’m sorry for being a bit...manic about the safety issue with my sleeping.” 

She shook her head. “I understand being afraid of your powers.” 

“What do yours feel like?” Daisy tilted her head. “Mine are like thousands of bees under my skin. I can feel the vibrations all around me in my bones.” 

Wanda bit her lip. “I could show you?” 

“Alright.” Daisy agreed without hesitation. 

She...this was new. Still, Wanda slowly reached out taking Daisy’s hand and letting her powers seep into her. “It’s like looking at the stars, all that expanse, and then knowing it’s contained inside of you.” 

Daisy sucked in a startled breath, her eyes widening. “Oh.” She smiled, tightening her hold on Wanda’s hand slightly. As Wanda’s powers ebbed away Daisy focused on her. “These are mine.” 

Wanda felt the vibrations then. Closing her eyes she felt it. How the whole world vibrated all around them. It was the universe, but it was too grounded for that. But it was...it was like a blind man seeing or a deaf man hearing. A totally new way of experiencing the world. “I can feel it.” She opened her eyes, smiling. “I never expected anyone to understand.” 

“I wish you could have seen Afterlife.” Daisy's eyes were soft, but she felt of pain and loss. “It was beautiful. I thought my abilities were a curse till I was there.” 

Wanda’s voice was gentle, half expecting Daisy to stop this openness. “Would you tell me about it?” 

“I think I’d like that.” Daisy pulled her legs up underneath her. “They were super into all that herbal mumbo jumbo. And like acupuncture, mud baths probably. But then considering how old everything was there it probably wasn’t weird old remedies to them. I caused an avalanche my first day.” 

Wanda found she didn't want to let go of Daisy’s hand. “So your approach of making me use my powers in frankly insane ways is just following their example?” 

“Well...not really. I mostly just made glasses with water in them sing.” Daisy’s free hand raised and the energy drink on the desk began to ring. It ceased as she lowered her arm. “I shattered a lot of wine glasses.” 

She snickered. “Really? Your training was making wine glasses vibrate and you thought to just jump straight in to seeing how much of an explosion I could contain? Or how high I could chuck you.” 

“But my way was more fun and consisted of 90% less hot dirt juice.” Daisy grinned. “Speaking of I was thinking, since I’ve got to wait for these bullet holes to heal, how do you feel about working on your bullet stopping abilities?” 

Wanda sighed. “I thought we already had been working on that?” 

“Well I haven’t gotten to break out my rifle in a while.” Daisy looked slightly gleeful. 

She felt a shiver of dread, but also...well training with Daisy was just plain fun. “Alright, but when you’re healed I have some ideas of things to work with your powers on.” Wanda tilted her head. “Actually, do you think you could vibrate things at a distance to explode?” 

Daisy blinked. “Yeah? But usually I’m avoiding the explosions.” 

“But wouldn’t it be useful to be able to master that?” Wanda prodded. 

Daisy nodded. “It could be. Huh, I’ll have to work on that.” She smiled. “I can’t wait to see if we can make your brother go faster by shooting him like a slingshot.” 

Wanda accepted this was in the future. Peter would get way too into it too. Oh well, it would probably be worth it. “Another month before we let Pietro use his power at the shipping yard.” 

“That’s probably wise.” Daisy yawned. She laughed softly at herself, pulling her hand away as she leaned back. “I think that’s my cue that I still have sleep to catch up on. Thank you again for well...everything.” 

Wanda resisted reaching back out to take Daisy’s hand again. Instead she stood up. “Friends don’t keep track of who owes whom. I was happy to help.” 

“I’ll swing by after the gym tomorrow.” Daisy said before Wanda could leave. 

Wanda bit at her lower lip. But then she turned back to face her friend. “Why don’t I meet you two at the gym? We could go to that juice place Darcy has been talking about?” 

“That sounds fun.” Daisy smiled and she was radiant.


	21. Attack of Baby Shark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I'm moving this week. So I probably am not going to update till the Wednesday next week, possibly the Sunday after that. Just wanted to give you guys a head up. Cause we've started packing the house and I've been spending hours on the phone with the cable company. Basically no updates till the first week of December.

Pietro had known his sister since his first moments. They had always been together. Them against the world. Eight months separated hadn’t changed the fact he knew her better than himself sometimes. So he was reminded of when they’d been sixteen and Wanda had had her first serious crush. It was...how was she still so bad at this? He knew he was charming but he hadn’t gotten all of the charm had he? 

“I think these American juice stores are surprisingly nice.” Wanda shifted slightly, her chair was as close to Daisy’s as politely possible. 

Daisy smiled, stirring her straw around in her carrot juice concoction. “Right? I mean I know Sokovia is a modern country and all, but juice bars are still spreading here in the US.” 

“You Starks drink weird juice, there was a kiwi mango with acai berries in the fridge.” Wanda’s eyes were bright. “But I’m thinking that is not a bad thing.” 

Daisy laughed. “It’s a California thing. Tony mostly lives there and I spent a good few years in LA.” 

“And Darcy?” Wanda pointed out with the slightest of smug twists to her mouth. 

Shrugging Daisy sipped from her drink. “Maybe good taste runs in the family.” 

“Really? Your costume is the only one that isn’t questionable.” Wanda’s eyes flicked over Daisy. “Yours is actually very nice.” 

Pietro cleared his throat slightly. “I thought Stark was colorblind.” 

“If only.” Daisy leaned in. “But, speaking of colors. How do you two feel about Cap’s new pink hair?” 

Wanda leaned forward. “Amusing, why?” 

“How would you like in? The next target is Sam.” Daisy’s eyes were alight with mischief. 

Wanda nodded, despite the fact this clearly would put them on team Ironman. “Do you already have a plot?” 

“Well I was thinking, what if we tag teamed him?” Daisy grinned. “It would give Peter enough time to go in through his apartment window.” 

Wanda smiled, clearly pleased at more time with Daisy. He could literally feel it. “I think it will be fun.”

“Right? Join the darkside. I’ll make cookies.” Daisy winked.

Pietro slurped at his juice, it was fine at best. But if joining forces with Tony and drinking weird fruit/vegetable juice was what helping his sister out meant, well the glitter trail Steve left these days was at least amusing. 

Wanda had definitely just kicked Daisy slightly. “Do we trust your ability to bake?” 

“I’m not that bad! And I’m getting better.” Daisy protested. “Meet up for plotting after Peter’s done his city rounds after school?”

“I can accompany Peter on his rounds.” Wanda volunteered, her body angled towards Daisy. 

Daisy smiled easily. “Thanks, I know he’s been getting antsy with not being able to do much.” 

“It’ll be good to use my powers some.” Wanda brushed some of her hair behind one ear. “And we can plot what we’ll do to Sam afterwards.” 

Pietro felt completely invisible. It was a new experience. But at least his sister wasn’t stuttering or blushing...just making cow eyes. 

Pietro was carrying a mango and something juice as he made his way into the labs. He hadn’t actually been here since Dr Cho had done something to his bullet wounds. 

“Speedy.” Darcy paused in her scribbling in a journal. Her eyes narrowed as she spotted the juice. “Is that a peace offering, bribery, or disappointment?” 

He held it out. “Bribery for information.” 

“Huh, acceptable.” She snagged the juice from his hands. “So what’s the info you want Road Runner?” 

Pietro leaned against the wall of the lab. “Your sister, is she single. And if so, is she interested in women?” 

“Interesting.” Darcy raised a brow at him. “You noticed the whole whatever thing is going on between them then?” 

“It’s hard to miss.” Pietro zipped to Darcy’s other side. It only hurt a little bit, progress. “So, are we doing something about it? Because this is a country of opportunity yes?” 

Darcy gave him a long look. “Alright cutie, I know Daisy bats for both teams and I know she thinks your sister is ‘supes hot’. And obviously they have their weird angsty conversations if left alone for too long. But no meddling.” 

“That is good news. And she’s single?” Pietro checked, he was completely willing to stock his and Wanda’s fridge with ice cream if needed. But it would be better not to. 

Darcy reached out and patted his shoulder. “If you breathe a word of this to anyone I’ll stick my taser so far up your ass you’ll be able to taste the lightning.” Her eyes flashed. “But her last boyfriend died to protect her. Which means hands off.” 

“Ah.” Peitro winced that was… “My sister has complicated tastes.” 

Darcy gave his shoulder a last pat before releasing him. “They’ll figure it out on their own. And Daisy’s a super spy, if we’ve noticed your sister’s crush she’ll have noticed.” She huffed at the expression on his face. “Girls are complicated sometimes.” 

He crossed his arms. “Fine, but if your sister hurts my sister though we will have a problem.” 

“Duh. Just no putting pressure on them.” Darcy rolled her eyes. “Now since you’re here and I know you don’t have a day job, hand me that screwdriver over there.” 

“I could have things to do.” He still handed her the screwdriver. 

Darcy waved the screwdriver at him. “You are unemployed and mooching off Tony.” 

“I was a very good thief, being an Avenger has cut into my style.” He winked. 

She actually snorted at that. “The ‘Avengers’ fight maybe two scary peeps a year. Get a day job or you’ll end up creating obstacle courses from hell like Daisy. Speaking of get her to get your papers sorted.” 

“Huh, so what is a great and brilliant Stark working on?” He liked this family his sister had been absorbed into. 

Darcy shrugged and pulled up a display on her holographic table. “I’m making a portable and deployable compact einstein rosen bridge generator. We can’t open bridges for distances over a mile. But we’re making progress.” 

“Wait...the weird science you are doing is portals?” Pietro crossed his arms. “Your father made robots and I got shot. Am I going to get dropped onto another planet?” 

“The probability isn’t zero.” Darcy waved her blueprints away and stepped to a table with a bunch of things he had no idea about. 

He followed looking over her shoulder. “Can you at least make sure it’s a planet where the aliens are cute?” 

“Your probability of planetary displacement just went up significantly.” Darcy replied. “But insider info, I have yet to meet an Asgardian who wasn’t an eight.” 

Pietro hummed. “And you’ve met many Asguardians?” 

////

Peter sat between Michelle and Ned. “Sup.” 

“Ms Ratburn dropped a pop quiz on us this morning.” Ned sighed. “It was terrible, I swear my life flashed before my eyes.” 

He stuck his straw into his juice pouch. “We watched Pride and Prejudice...it was so gross.” 

“What, May’s crush on Colin Firth?” Ned asked, the asshole. 

Peter let his head thunk on his arms. “She and Darcy argued about which Darcy was hotter.” 

“That is very confusing considering Darcy’s named Darcy.” Ned agreed. 

Michelle cleared her throat. “So is this a good time to ask if Daisy would sign my Quake poster, or are we supposed to just keep ignoring that?” 

“What?” He snapped up straight. “No?! That’s ridiculous! I mean Daisy works at a gym. She’s a totally normal human. Don’t be silly.” 

Ned made an awkward squeaking noise. 

Michelle raised an eyebrow, while leaning backwards. “I don’t care. But on the down low, I got it.”

“There’s nothing to keep on the down low. You’re talking crazy talk.” Peter felt sweat running down the side of his neck. This was so bad! 

Ned and Michelle exchanged a look. “Peter it’s ok, no one else knows. We won’t say anything.” 

“What he said.” Michelle jabbed a thumb towards Ned. 

Ned rocked a bit. “I mean who’d take us to R rated movies if Daisy couldn’t cause of press? She only ditched us that time she had to go help SHIELD.” 

“Keep your voice down!” Peter hissed. “Wait, SHIELD?”

Ned chuckled. “It’s obvious right? She’s Quake? Superhero and SHIELD consultant?” 

Michelle reached out and patted his back. “Are you ok?” 

“Look you can’t tell anyone!” He looked between them desperately. 

Ned nodded. “We already figured that part.”

“It’s kinda obvious.” Michelle’s fingers tapped at her knee. “Which can you get me a Quake autograph? For real she’s kind of my hero.” 

Peter let his head fall into arms again. This was so incomprehensibly bad. 

“We won’t tell anyone. I mean it’d put you and Aunt May in danger right? Like in the movies and stuff.” Ned assured him. “Hey we can totally be like part of a network of allies or something!”

He cracked an eye open at Ned. “What?” 

“Like you know, how the good guys have friends in all sorts of places.” Ned leaned in with passion. 

Michelle rolled her eyes. “Quake isn’t going to want our help Ned. We’re highschool students and she’s got Spiderman for backup.” 

Peter blinked. “Spiderman?” 

“Your sister’s boyfriend?” Ned looked at him funny. 

“I know that.” Peter kind of wanted to die. His friends thought...oh god he was going to have to listen to what they thought of Spiderquake. Which was so gross. Extra super duper gross.

Michelle elbowed him. “Stop being weird.”

Peter held out the large plastic trashbag. “Why is no one committing even a little crime?” 

“I’m sorry, I know you were hoping for more.” Wanda replied while floating garbage from the sidewalk into the open bag. “We could do a circuit around Queens?” 

He tied off the bag and added it to the neat pile they’d already filled. “It’s alright, we can just finish this and go home.” 

“We could pick up slushies on the way home?” Wanda offered, which was sweet since she hated slushies. 

Peter smiled up at her, which considering the mask was a bit pointless, but whatever. “That sounds fun.” He opened up a new trashbag. 

They both paused and looked up as they heard the familiar sound of gunshots. 

Peter and Wanda looked at eachother. “That sounds like it was from the bank.” 

“No one would be dumb enough to rob a bank when we’re right here?” Wanda’s eyes were lighting up red though as she began to hover. 

Peter noticed the people running out of the bank. “Criminals are very dumb sometimes.” He shot his web across the street and went zipping over. Peeking his head up to look through the window he frowned, hitting his comm. “Four robbers, handguns only.” 

-”I’ll go through the front door.”-

Peter’s eyes narrowed. “Got it, I’ve got the gunmen.” Was it bad he was psyched for a robbery? He was very excited to get to do something.

The front bank doors ripped open as Wanda walked in like an avenging red god. Huh, that’s why the whole ‘Avenger’ thing. He got it. 

Flipping the window open, Peter zipped in, webbing two guns as he swung through. “Hi guys! That seems like a lot of guns for the bank?” 

“Spiderman!” One of the robbers snapped. “Shoot him!”

The two remaining armed robbers suddenly froze as red light encompassed them. 

“Wow, you forgot Scarlet Witch? You’re not very good at this.” Peter webbed the now stationary robber’s hands. “You should look into that?” 

////

Pepper sighed as the two reporters followed her. Why PR, both SI and Avenger’s teams, had thought this was a good idea she didn’t know. But here she was. Hot on her heels were Fred Foswell from Global News and Gloria Grant from British World News. “These are our private labs on this level.” 

They walked out of the elevator as Pepper continued the tour of the Tower. “First we have our bioengineering department lead by Dr Cho. The advances in medical technology we’re making here will begin to reach the patent office by the end of the year.” The doors swished open and Pepper was able to smile as she gestured to Dr Cho, in a clean lab coat just for this occasion. “I’d like to introduce you to the brilliant mind leading some of the foremost research on skin grafting and synthetic organ development.” 

Pepper was able to politely stand back as several photos were snapped, the camera man had a running video feed as well. Several questions were asked and Dr Cho, like the consummate professional she was, dealt with them beautifully. It was almost enough for Pepper’s feelings of dread to abate. Almost

In fact everything was going shockingly fine on science floor. The reporters had been suitably impressed and the staff had been competent for the first four labs. Pepper was more resigned than anything else when the astrophysics lab doors opened. It’d been a good run. PR could deal with the shame with smaller christmas bonuses this year. 

Because the astrophysics lab was insane. Dr Selvig wasn’t wearing pants, again. Instead he was nattering on under his breath while the intern, Ian, looked like he was near tears trying to shove pants at the man. Then across the room wearing plaid flannel pants, a slice of pie pun t-shirt, hair piled high on her head, complete with bunny slippers was Dr Foster. The woman looked like the science gremlin she was. 

Ian looked at her and shuffled over. “Sorry Ms Potts, some new readings on the black hole came in and they’re on their eighth pot of coffee. I’m not like Darcy, they don’t listen to me.”

Pepper’s eye twitched. “Ian, why don’t you go find Darcy and have her help her coworkers finish getting ready for the press.” Which was already there. 

“Ah uh...about that. Someone stole the poptarts and Darcy said something about revenge and left?” Ian’s voice squeaked slightly.

Pepper turned to the press with the blandest of fake smiles. “Our astrophysicists work on a bit of a different sleep schedule than the rest of us. If you don’t mind we can look at the robotics lab before circling back.” 

No one got to agree or disagree to that. Instead they were interrupted by a girlish shrieking scream from the hallway. As one they all turned towards the glass wall between the lab and the hallway. 

Tony went sprinting past them, barefoot and grease stained, a herd of his robots on his heels with fire extinguishers, and one with what looked like a cattleprod. 

They all blinked, a camera flashed. 

Then smuggly traipsing up the hallway and entering the lab was Darcy, holding a giant pop tart box. She looked at them all, smug grin in place, and shrugged. “Poptarts are sacred to the science processes.” 

“SPAWN!!!” Tony screamed as he came running back by the labs, his suit snapping into place to defend himself from DUM-EE with a cattle prod. 

Only the suit wasn’t his usual suit. It took a second before the first snort echoed through the lab. 

The suit was the bluest of blues, glittery silver stars across the thing with brilliant red accents. It looked like a patriotic wet dream, except for the sequined blue tutu around the waist. Truly, it was hideous. 

Tony’s voice warbled in outraged as the faceplate snapped into place. And then blasting from the speakers came an unmistakable sound. ~BABY SHARK DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO.~

It was a train wreck. Tony somehow managed to slump. He raised his hand, pointed at his eye slots, and then pointed them at Darcy through the glass in the universal gesture for ‘I’m watching you’. He then stomped back down the hall like a petulant toddler. The dulcet tones of Baby Shark echoing behind him. 

Darcy laughed into the stunned silence, it was more of a cackle than anything else. She grabbed the pants from Ian and chucked them at Selvig. “Pants in the lab from ten am to eight pm. You know the rules or no cinnamon roll pancakes.” 

Selvig grumbled, but he actually pulled on his pants, not that man seemed to have noticed literally anything else. 

Darcy easily grabbed the coffee mug out of Foster’s hands, ignoring the grabby hands that followed her briefly. “Sorry Pepper, but he stole the poptarts and I told him revenge would be swift and terrible.” 

“Is the robotics lab at least intact?” Pepper asked and just...she was going to have to negotiate for so much of this to be left unaired. 

Darcy sniggarded. “I wouldn’t hurt the lab.” She smiled at the reporters. “Since Janey probably didn’t explain we’re developing space travel here. Hopefully someday it’ll be humans dropping in unannounced on aliens instead of the other way round. Course it’s slow going because we have to take safety precautions.” 

“Safety precautions?” A dumbfounded reporter Fred asked.

Darcy beamed. “You should get Pepper to explain more, it’s her baby. But there’s an internal SI committee that all experiments have to be cleared by now. Supes cool, and will hopefully make sure none of us go off our rockers mad scientist. It’s like the moral from Jurassic Park, just cause we can do something doesn’t mean we should. My theory is the more PHDs a person has the less common sense they have.” 

“But don’t you have a PHD?” Fred asked, his general demeanor best described as gobsmacked. 

Darcy took a drink from the coffee she’d confiscated from Jane. “I just made the Ironman suit sing Baby Shark with a computer virus I ‘borrowed’ from Quake. Common sense is relative. But if you want I can show you what Tony and I have been working on in the robotics lab. It’s a bit flashier than our equations here in astro-lab.” 

Pepper wordlessly accepted the confiscated coffee from Darcy. It was going to be a long day. 

Five minutes later Pepper had a small smile on her mouth as Darcy wowed the reporters with the electric engines. It might be salvageable. And the next lab on the list was plants. That had to be safe. 

Pepper sipped her herbal tea. “I think I’m going to schedule a spa day. I’m going to need it after the news airs tonight.”

“You’ll be fine.” Darcy dumped some sugar into her own cup of tea. “That was excellent. Tony got humanized, no one is going to be terrified of scientists who forget to put on pants and wear bunny slippers to work. And you got some good stuff with the normal scientists to make investors happy.” 

“Tony’s going to be insufferable.” She appreciated it had gone terribly in beneficial ways instead of bad. “It’ll be the only thing on the news for a week.” 

“I’m sure.” Darcy pushed the plate of cookies towards her. “But just think, if everyone is playing Tony being chased by the bots on repeat, they’re not micro analyzing Dr Cho and asking if SI is trying to make fleshy artificial people.” 

Pepper actually stilled at that. That was a possibility actually. “Remind me to make sure they aren’t planning on doing that. It’s a crime I can’t steal you for the business side of things.” 

“Janey is going to the arctic to get some readings next month.” Darcy sighed, and she looked exhausted. “Since Tony dumped this on us we could work on fixing it then.” 

Pepper smiled slightly at that. She got it. “He does tend to just do things without telling anyone else.” 

“Agreed. I talked to PR, publicising the prank war as much as possible should be good.” Darcy pushed her glasses up her nose. “You know, distract people from the legislation over collateral a bit.” 

Pepper sipped at her tea. “It’s certainly been useful having everyone focused mainly on the Michigan and ATCU scandal.” 

“They indited that congressman who was supporting the ATCU yesterday.” Darcy raised her teacup in celebration.

Pepper tapped her cup against it.


	22. Full Moon Shenanigans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I live! And as of friday I have internet again. I am now a haunted villager. Because apparently the town has less then six hundred people in it making it a village. Also it's hilariously creepy. I'm talking air raid siren that just goes off every night, a rich history of businesses burning down regularly for the last hundred years, legit being called 'Hell on Earth', name of the town actually meaning 'cursed or evil place'. I cannot even with how ridiculously over the top this place is. But I'm back and updates shall resume. Also I love my tiny new house.

Daisy dropped onto a fire escape. She blinked as she saw what was definitely a kids birthday party going on inside the apartment. And it looked like a small army of elementary school kids were staring out at her. She held up a hand. “Sup?” 

The squeals started then. A beleaguered and vaguely exhausted looking father came skidding into the living room and spotted her. 

The two of them made eye contact. Daisy accepted what was about to happen as the father stepped over and opened the window. He cleared his throat while waving his hands at the kids to get them to quiet down. “Quake, uh..do you have time to have some cake?” 

She softened at the expression on the birthday kid’s face. “How’d you know cake was my favorite?” 

“Thank you, my daughter is a big fan.” He stepped back, leaving the window open. 

Daisy climbed in and spotted the girl with the tightest braids and a party cone hat on. “I’m guessing you’re the birthday girl?” 

“Hi! I’m Diamond and I’m six!” The girl was practically vibrating. 

She smiled and held out her gauntleted hand for a fist bump. “Nice to meet you Diamond. So, are we playing birthday games?”

“We’re playing Just Dance on dad’s Wii!” Diamond excitedly exclaimed, every first grader in the room anxiously waited for her response. 

Daisy was eating cake when one of the kids hopped up next to her on the couch. “Do you think I’ll have a Spiderman someday?” 

“What do you mean?” Daisy looked at the gap toothed girl in pigtails. 

Diamond eagerly spoke up. “He’s your Prince Charming right?” 

“Ah.” Daisy set her paper party plate to the side. She was fairly sure the dad was still filming his daughter’s birthday party. And god she didn’t want to fuck this up. “Spiderman and I aren’t together like that. We’re partners. I trust him and he trusts me. But we’re not in love. I know there’s some photos that make us seem like we are.” 

A boy with face painted stars on his cheeks spoke up. “But you held hands!” 

“We did.” Daisy smiled. “I was very worried because the villain we stopped was very dangerous. I don’t know about you but I like hugging my friends.” 

A little girl with pigtails actually teared up. “But love!” 

“Just because Spiderman and I aren’t in love doesn’t mean love isn’t real.” She reached out and gently bumped the girl’s cheek. “One of my best friends crossed the universe to rescue his girlfriend from another planet. He believed she could be saved when all of SHIELD had given up.” 

Daisy looked around the spellbound little kids. “Love is complicated and sometimes it is big and epic like in the stories. And sometimes it’s not and we get it wrong. Which you should never feel bad if you ever fall for the wrong person. You just have to remember you deserve someone who you can trust, depend on, makes you laugh, and who treats you like a princess or prince.” 

“Like how Anna loved Hans but then loved Kristoff?” Pigtails asked, her face scrunched slightly. 

She smiled. “Yeah exactly like that.” Her voice was serious as she looked at all the kids. “And I’m a superhero right?” Daisy waited for the awestruck eyes to nod. “So if anyone tells you you are weak or silly for loving a Hans you tell them even heroes like Quake make mistakes.” 

“But you’ve got powers.” Facepoint boy protested. 

Daisy nodded. “Everyone makes mistakes. So you just have to remember to get back up and keep trying.” She looked around at the kids. “Besides you’ve all got a few years before you start finding your prince charmings and princesses and stumbling on a few Hans’.” 

“But I want to fall in love.” Pigtails sighed dramatically. Several of the little girls nodding in agreement. 

She laughed at the kids. “Just because you’re not old enough for romance doesn’t mean you’re too young for love yeah? I mean don’t you all love your friends, your parents?” 

The dad beamed at her and handed her another piece of cake. “You’re pretty smart there Quake.” 

“I try.” She laughed. “Now, at least two of you haven’t kicked my butt at dancing games yet.” 

Daisy tossed a beer at Hunter. “Sup, Darcy in?” 

“Yeah.” Hunter popped the cap off the beer. “You hear Bobbie’s working as Potts’s new secretary?” 

Daisy grinned. “That’s amazing.” She looked at her friend. “We should all go get a beer some night.” 

“Sounds good Tremors. And for what it’s worth, I like that your new dad is just hiring us all instead of trying to kill us. It’s a nice change of pace.” Hunter knocked back his beer. 

She rolled her eyes and moved into the lab past him. Daisy took in the small army of tiny robot roombas. “Planning on vacuuming the entire tower?” 

“Preparing for Tony’s revenge. He’s still trying to get the suit to stop playing Baby Shark.” Darcy’s voice was muffled, her entire top half inside the car she was doing...something. 

“I have the new suit pics as my screensaver.” Daisy leaned against the car. “So what’s the car do? Cause this thing looks like it should be space worthy.” 

Darcy’s voice came from the depths of the vehicle. “I’m retrofitting it as a manned probe for sticking through man controlled wormholes into space.” One of Darcy’s legs kicked up slightly as she grunted. “Well it’ll be mice and shit first.” 

Daisy blinked. “You know your science has gotten ninety percent more terrifying since you got a budget.” 

“Thanks, I’ve had ideas but never been able to actualize them.” Darcy wiggled her way out from under the hood. She grinned. “So what brings my little sis all the way to the Tower?” 

Daisy shoved her hands into her pockets. “Work done, phone alerted me to a car chase which car’s don’t really run me over. Then when leaving the scene I got abducted by some adorable six year olds and I think I gave them a morality lecture on love using Frozen as a template. So I needed some pain killers, cause quake powers. But Peter’s still in class, May’s working, I don’t have another class at the gym till tomorrow… Need me to blow some shit up?” 

“Want to help write a program for the roombas? I’m planning on making them little claw arms. They’ll be my adorable army of minions.” Darcy grinned. 

She considered her sister. “So what’s the real reason we’re instigating a full scale prank war between the Avengers?” 

“We need them focused on something that isn’t arguing over civil rights and the logistics of policing enhanced. Besides Clint and Natasha have totally been sneaking out and doing something with Hill. Like I wouldn’t notice that.” Darcy scoffed. 

Daisy grinned. “I talked to Coulson, you were right. SHIELD’s had twenty inhuman recruits in the last month. And I may not like the media stuff, sets my teeth on edge really, but it’s helping.” 

“Told ya. All you spies and corporate goons are missing the point. It’s not about intel. Its giving your enemies to the vultures and dumping out a metric ton of happy nothing to satisfy any questions aimed at us.” Darcy waved a hand airily. “There’s too many Spiderquake memes, Spiderman tricks vids, interviews with innocent inhumans, soon to be added to with a deluge of Avengers prank videos. Top story if you google Tony is his mystery new kiddo. Meanwhile the military and our government keep having expose after expose on corruption and human experimentation and Hydra infestation.”

“I am kinda terrified of you and I make earthquakes with my hands.” Daisy was only partially joking. “I’m pretty sure Director Mace would have killed to have you help him with his stupid PR campaign.” 

Darcy hummed. “He was doing a pretty solid job building up public relations post Hydragate.”

“Hey, he’s grateful to be alive and on seizure meds.” Daisy hugged her sister. “You did the right thing, he’s alive because of what you and Tony did to the framework. He sent you a fruit basket, remember?”

“Yeah.” Darcy hugged her back before stepping back with a slightly shaky breath, a slightly plastic looking smile on her face. “I’m kinda awesome.” 

“The awesomest.” Daisy agreed carefully. “You’re coming home tonight. I’ll fly us there.” 

Darcy groaned, visibly relaxing as they moved past Mace’s trauma from dying in the framework. “I love you, but traveling by quake is literally worse than being swung around by Peter. And Peter transport feels like being a ping pong ball.” 

“Well Peter is spending the night at Ned’s. And I’m harder for the paps to trace, also we can leave from the helipad and no one needs to know you left the tower at all.” Daisy grinned, it was hilarious how loud Darcy screamed. “And I love you too.” Which...yeah she really meant that. 

////

Tony was feeling maudlin, which wasn’t like him. But for the first time leaving for Malibu didn’t feel like a breath of fresh air. “What are those kids doing to me?” 

“More proof Tony Stark has a heart.” Pepper stepped to his side and pressed a kiss to his temple. “They’re good kids.” 

He poured himself some scotch. “I don’t know how to deal with the kid.” 

“Peter?” Pepper pulled out her evening lotion. Which, it was going to be an early morning then. “Have you considered a board game night?” 

Tony blinked at that. “I could build a game room. Kids like games.” 

“That’s not...sure Tony. Just try not to go too overboard.” Pepper stole his glass and took a drink before handing it back. “Maybe ask Clint what his kids like?” 

Tony scoffed. “Please, birdman’s kids are tiny and live on a farm. They’re homeschooled nerds. My kids are way more awesome.” 

“They’re certainly all brilliant.” Pepper agreed. 

He stared out the window. “They’re smart in different ways than me. Think differently.” 

“I don’t know, Darcy certainly is a lot like you.” Her hand pressed to his back lightly before she moved away to the bed. 

Tony shook his head slightly. “She sees machines as easier to piece together people. And she cares about people, understands them better than I ever have.” 

“She’ll certainly be a better CEO than you were.” Pepper replied dryly from where she was carefully lotioning her legs. It was just part of her routine, and one he wasn’t going to interrupt tonight. 

Setting his glass aside he made his way to the bed. “They’re all brilliant, which is to be expected as my offspring. But I still want to protect them. Maybe a new AI to help them out?” 

“They are doing a pretty good job of protecting themselves, and they’ve called you when they needed help. The good sense genes clearly skipped you but not them. They got your height for sure though.” Her voice was full of gentle teasing. 

He chuckled lowly as he climbed into bed. “I don’t know, I picked you, so I’m doing something right. And ow, I’m above average with the height. They’re lucky they got my genes.” 

“Charm will get you nowhere tonight.” But she smiled as she set her bottle of lotion aside and joined him in the bed. 

Tony laid down staring up at the ceiling. “Have you ever thought about kids?” 

Pepper took a second to reply, and then her voice was cautious. “Yes, not seriously for a while now. With everything with SI, you, it just never seemed like the time.” 

“I never wanted kids. Didn’t want to fuck them up like Howard fucked me up.” Tony couldn’t bring himself to look at Pepper’s face, not when he knew it would be full of sympathy he didn’t want right now. “But maybe...maybe it won’t be so bad.” 

////

Yuri wanted to bang her head against her steering wheel. She hadn’t realized Spiderman was a talker...but oh god he was a talker. Also the city was just full of crazy, fuck fullmoon shifts. Volunteering for this was a shit idea. But hunting a werewolf wasn’t exactly going to get done by anyone else. 

-”This is awesome! I haven’t gotten to do this much stuff in one shift of heroing before!”- Spiderman chirped over comm he’d handed her before zipping off to do circuits of the neighborhood. -”Spidercop is on the job!”-

Yuri let her head thunk against her steering wheel. “Please stop.” 

-”But Spidercop is awesome! And I stopped a mugging, a car theft, and got that lady safely back to her apartment.”- 

How did Quake put up with this? “No voices, just no voices. Did no one teach you to only comm for relevant information?” 

Yuri slapped a pair of cuffs on her second streaker of the night. “If you pee in the back of the cruiser, I swear to god.” 

Streaker giggled. “I’m a legend!” 

“You really aren’t.” She steered him towards the car with a hand on his disturbingly sweaty shoulder. “They’ll have pants for you at the station.” 

Yuri gave his shoulder a shove as she opened the back of the car. God she was seeing so much more of this man than she ever wanted to. “Just get in.” 

Streaker just kept giggling. 

She clicked her comm back on...oh god he was still talking. 

-”The streets were rough but Spidercop was there.”- He was ridiculously trying to make his voice deeper. 

Yuri climbed into her squad car. This was the actual worst. 

The radio crackled to life -“I’ve got a 10-91 at the bodega on Jackson Ave.”-

She hit her comm. “Spiderman, we’ve got an animal report on Jackson. I’m heading there now, come in from the north. Hopefully we’ll catch it.” 

-”Oh wow, yeah no I’m going. We’re going to catch a werewolf.”-

Yuri flipped on the siren. She glanced at the Streaker in the back. “We’re making a pit stop.” And then she hit the gas. 

////

Peter stuck to the side of a building. His goggles switched to night vision as he looked at the alley. He squinted his eyes. “Got something in the alley behind the apartments past the bodega.” 

-”I’m two minutes out.”- Yuri replied.

He jumped to one wall of the alley. “Sup, you’re looking a little hairy over there?” 

The lurking shape looked up. 

“Oh yeah.. That’s a werewolf. Hey sir! You a murderous and animalistic werewolf? Or just a murderous werewolf?” He yelped and jumped to the other wall, barely missing the flash of claws and slobbering teeth. 

Peter grabbed onto the brick and scrambled up. “Oh just total murderous rage. Cool cool cool cool cool cool.” 

The werewolf snarled, slobber flying from its mouth. It leapt, claws digging into the brick. And jesus it was able to crawl up the walls. 

“Oh that’s some Night of the Living dead A reel stuff.” Peter webbed one of its hands...paws? to the wall. “Stay puppy.” 

It threw its head back and howled. And then ripped it’s hand straight through the webbing.

Peter threw himself into a summersault over the head of the grey blur. “Knuckle buckets!” He scrambled up the side of the building. “YURI! It’s very fluffy and very angry!” 

-”I have a tranq gun and dog pole!”-

“Come one wolfy, I’m not tasty.” He dived over the edge of the roof and rolled to his feet, just missing the wolf slamming where he’d just been. 

He hopped backwards shooting webbing at the wolf. Kicking off, he swung around the wolf, wrapping the werewolf in webbing. “Please work!” Peter landed on the roof again.

Peter felt a flash of fear as the wolf snapped his webs like they were made of string. “That’s not good. Have you considered anger management? I hear it works wonders.” 

“Bad Doggy!” Peter punched the werewolf in the face. 

It’s head snapped to the side. Then it snarled and struck out. 

Peter cried out as he went flying off the roof. His webs hit the side of the roof. “Oh you are not happy!” He didn’t release the ends of his webbing though. Letting it stretch taunt and then snap him back towards the werewolf foot first.

They both went flying off the roof. The wolf grabbed Peter’s leg, claws digging into it. 

“NO!” And then the air was whistling past them. Peter managed to block a swipe for his chest, and then punched the werewolf in the face. Which is when they crashed through a car windshield. 

Peter felt sick as he wheezed, rolling off of the glass and onto the concrete. “Ow.” 

A gun went off three times. “You doing ok Spiderman?”

“I’m so grounded.” He groaned. Peter rolled over and started to crawl back to his feet.

Yuri grabbed the back of his suit and hauled him the rest of the way up. “Come on. We’ve got a werewolf to stop.” 

“He’s kinda Furryious.” Peter winced. He was so dead when Daisy and May found out about this… he was gonna have to steal Darcy’s apartment in the tower. 

Yuri let out a sound of deep resignation. “How old are you?” 

“Look out!” Peter yanked Yuri out of the way of a blur of angry fur and claws. 

She twisted and shot off another shot. 

Peter switched his web cartridges to the net cartridges. “Hey Wolfy! Over here!” 

“What are you doing that for?” Yuri snapped. 

He noted that was very much not a tranq gun...oh goodie their werewolf could survive being shot by real bullets. “We can’t let it run off and get the munchies.” 

“Right, keep taunting the werewolf.” Yuri brought her gun up to bare on the creature. “Hamper it.” 

Peter felt shaky, his leg throbbing. “I can do that.” He started firing nets made of web fluid, while jumping up. Spinning he arched over the creature, web one leg, web the other. Web them again, and again, and again even as he went flying back over the werewolf. 

He grinned as he webbed the wolf’s furry arms to its sides. Raising his arm he meant to hit it again when he saw the bike messenger. “Woah! STOP!” Peter launched himself, switching cartridges on one hand, he webbed a trashcan and yanked it. 

The can crashed into the bike messenger, sending them both flying out of the way of the werewolf. Unfortunately that left him immediately in front of the werewolf, who had just ripped his arms out of the single web net. 

Peter choked as a furry hand grabbed him by the throat. “Good Puppy?” 

“SPIDERMAN!” Yuri yelled, running for them. 

He slapped his web shooter against it, and the dendrotoxin dart went in. Peter choked as claws ripped into him. “Ow.” And then he hit the ground.


	23. Behold, a Dumb Dumb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup!

Yuri yanked her jacket off while dropping to her knees besides Spiderman. She slapped the jacket down on his stomach and pressed down with her body weight. “Spiderman! What do you need?”

Spiderman wheezed, his blood hot under her hands. His hand flopped to his side. “Daisy.” 

She frowned but realized he was going for a slim pocket in his suit. Thank god, she wasn’t sure if she needed to call for an ambulance or not. Did he heal? “I got it.” Yuri held the jacket down, slowing the bleeding. With her other hand she unzipped his pocket and pulled out a cellphone. “Thank fuck.” 

“It hurts. It really hurts.” Spiderman’s voice was tight, his stupid goggles were jarred to one side. 

Yuri swiped at the screen and pulled up the numbers. She saw the name Daisy and hit call. Cramming the phone between her shoulder and ear. “I’m calling Daisy, you’re going to be ok. Just hang in there.” 

“I stopped him yeah?” His voice was wet. 

She nodded. “You got him. You did really good. Best partner I’ve ever had, even if you like puns way too much.” 

Spiderman’s voice was scared. “I don’t want to die.” He sucked in panicked breaths.

“You’re not going to die.” Yuri grabbed the bottom of his mask and yanked it up over his mouth so he could breathe easier. “I promise you’re not going to die.” 

She would have kept talking but the phone stopped ringing and a voice came through.

-”Kid? You need me to come pick you up?”- A female voice asked. 

Yuri felt a thread of alarm at the word ‘kid’. There was no way. “Spiderman is hurt, do I call an ambulance?” 

-“Stay on the line.”- The voice cut out.

Spiderman struggled limply. “I can’t see.”

“That’s, fuck it.” Yuri adjusted Spiderman’s goggles so they were lined up with his eyes again. “See, your mask was just messed up. Right? You’re good. Daisy is coming.” She winced. “I think.” 

He let out a whine of pain. 

Yuri knew she was starting to panic slightly. But this wasn't how it was supposed to happen. He was just supposed to be some super powered back up. Hell she liked New York's resident heroes. As much as she had been dreaming of throttling him, well she agreed with their version of vigilante justice. “Hang in there. You’re going to be irritating me on comms about your weird Noir Spider drama in no time.” 

She wasn’t sure how she stayed there kneeling over a bleeding Spiderman before the air began to vibrate. And then there was a crash, filled with red light. And Quake was there. 

Quake hissed as she realized the situation. “Pietro please.” 

There was a blueish blur and Yuri found herself knocked to the side. And then Spiderman was gone, just some blood stained asphalt. 

“What happened?” Quake’s voice was harsh as she kicked at the still unconscious werewolf. Actually Yuri could feel her teeth vibrating in her head. 

“Enough.” And shit that was the Scarlet Witch grabbing Quake’s shoulder and pulling her back. “Go, I’ve got this. He’ll need you.” 

The two heroes stood there staring each other in the eye. Finally Quake nodded. She took a step backwards and then launched herself into the sky. 

Yuri let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. The very air felt lighter. She fell back a step. 

Scarlet Witch..her name was Wanda? turned to face her. “Are you injured officer?” 

“Detective.” She corrected automatically. “Sorry, no I’m fine. What..is Spiderman going to be ok?”

Wanda, or she was still sparking with red magic whirling around her like some sort of otherworldly being. “My brother has speed. Spiderman will be fine.” Her eyes narrowed as she looked at the unconscious werewolf, it’s legs still webbed to the road. “What is this creature?” 

Yuri watched uneasily as the woman knelt besides the creature. “It’s a werewolf. I was tracking reports around the last several full moons. I needed enhanced backup so I asked Spiderman.” 

“I see.” Wanda’s hand rose and red light leached into the creature. “Oh you poor man. You took something you should not have.” 

And huh, werewolf had been wearing a necklace. It’d been impossible to see with all the fur. But now it was rising, surrounded in red light. And then it snapped into Scarlet Witch’s hand. She looked up at Yuri. “He should return to his normal form with the sun, for good this time.” 

Yuri winced. “I’m gonna need the necklace for evidence.” 

“It’s not of this world.” Scarlet Witch held out the necklace dropping it into her hand. 

Yuri frowned, it was cold to the touch, the gem embedded in it surprisingly heavy. It was over...but. “Tell Spiderman to swing by, when he’s better.” She looked up at the far more terrifying hero than Spiderman. But it needed to be said. 

////

Wanda was barely keeping from rushing as she made her way to the medical floor of the tower. She ignored the various people and went straight in. Her eyes found Pietro first. He was laying on a medical gurney with an IV in one arm. But he was fiddling with a phone and no one was bothering him. So he was fine. She could see in his face someone had given him painkillers. “Pietro.” 

“Heeeeyyyyy.” His head lulled towards her. “Doctor said I can go home in the morning.” 

She reached out straightening his hair. “You didn’t hurt anything too badly running?” 

“Eh, I knew you would need me.” His face was oddly serious. “The kid will be alright. Dr Cho is making new skin for him.” 

Wanda sighed in relief. She looked over to where several medical types were circling a bed. There was a glimpse of red and blue. Daisy was standing guard, her entire figure looking like it was carved from stone. “But Peter will be alright?” 

“The creature tore through his stomach muscles, several puncture wounds on his leg. But the doctor said he was lucky, none of his intestines were badly damaged. Lots of blood loss though.” Pietro reached up pulling her hand away from his head, and pulling her attention back to him. “Ms Parker isn’t here yet.” His voice was meaningful then. 

She stilled, her powers automatically connecting them. Wanda leaned down and kissed his forehead. “Thank you.” 

“Eh, no permanent damage. Just pulled some muscles...all of my muscles.” Pietro grinned up at her. “But I get the good stuff and a cute nurse to give me juice. I’ll be back on my feet tomorrow.” 

Wanda softened. “You’re ridiculous brate.” She gave his arm a final squeeze. 

She walked cautiously, till she was standing besides Daisy. “Is there anything I can do?” 

Daisy didn’t move, her feelings a tightly controlled storm around her that Wanda knew better than to touch. “What happened?” 

“Detective Yuri flagged him down and asked for help with her werewolf case over a week ago. She thought she needed enhanced assistance. He agreed. They had the creature till a bike messenger almost rode into the fight.” Wanda had a bad feeling about how Daisy was going to take this. 

Daisy twitched slightly. “Oh.” 

Wanda reached and took Daisy’s hand. 

Daisy finally moved, threading their fingers together and squeezing. “He’s going to be ok.” 

“He is.” Wanda agreed. 

They stood there for who knows how long. Wanda could properly see Peter now. He was out, an oxygen mask strapped to his face, his whole midsection wrapped in bandages and gauze. But he was getting some color back. It felt like time had stopped, at least until the door burst open and May arrived. “Peter!” 

“Hey, no he’s ok.” Daisy caught May. “I promise he’s going to be ok.” 

Wanda went to pull back only to find Daisy was still hanging onto her hand. So she stilled and stayed there as May hugged Daisy as tightly as possible. She stayed when May released Daisy to go sit on the edge of Peter’s bed. Wanda just...stayed. 

Wanda wasn’t sure why she woke up, but she did wake up. Blinking blearily she looked around the room. She was wedged half sitting, pressed against Pietro. Daisy had clearly passed out at the foot of the same bed. Wanda blinked as she realized Daisy was using Pietro as a human pillow as well. She smiled slightly, and eased herself out of the narrow and uncomfortable bed. It was as she was considering finding a bathroom that she realized what had woken her up. 

Peter was groggily looking at May who was passed out in a chair next to his bed. 

She padded over. Reaching out she caught one of his fumbling hands before he could jostle himself. “Hey, you’re in Stark Tower, medical floor.” 

“Wan?” His voice slurred.

Wanda prevented him from pulling out the oxygen tube under his nose. “Easy, you were hurt.” She kept her voice even and soft. 

He settled frowning. 

“Sleep, you’re safe.” She didn’t add that the morning would be rough. Or that there would be consequences. Wanda waited till he drifted off again. She sighed looking at the clock. Four am. Well, she could go get coffee. No one was going to stay asleep much longer. She could feel their dreams fading. Coffee...and maybe hunt down Darcy. 

////

Peter winced, they really hadn’t done more than use Dr Cho’s artificial skin to piece his shredded skin back together. They’d had to do more to repair his abdominal muscles. Which it had all hurt, but what made it worse was the air of disappointment. No one had said anything about how stupid he’d been. Which was...not a good sign. He’d never been so stupid no one actually got mad at him for it before. 

“Three days bedrest, with your healing factor we’ll talk about the next step then.” Dr Cho looked at Aunt May. “We’re keeping him on a vitamin rich, protein high and easy to digest diet while he’s here. But you can take him home after dinner if you want. I just want to make sure there’s no signs of his body rejecting the grafts.” 

Aunt May nodded. “Of course, medications?” 

“He’ll have his last dose of the prescription pain meds with dinner. After that you can give him ibuprofen as needed. If there’s any change you can always call me.” Dr Cho patted his leg. “And stay off that leg of yours. If you do that, everything looks promising though.” She looked between them and seemed to notice the… general air. “I’ll leave you to it then. If you need anything just hit the button.” Dr Cho paused on her way out by Daisy, but she didn’t say anything and left. 

Daisy was leaning against the wall, arms crossed, and that was very much a gun holstered on one hip. She was plainly standing guard. And she hadn’t so much as cracked a smile since he’d woken up. Or spoken to anyone. 

“Why don’t you work on finishing off your jello.” Aunt May set his tray back on his lap. 

He nodded. “Sure.” It was suffocating. Peter prodded at his jello, but took a bite. It was...well he was not a fan but would rather eat his own tongue than complain about anything at the moment. “So...uh is Darcy here?” 

“She’s down in the lab with Tony.” Aunt May gave him a pointed look. “They both ducked in briefly while you were unconscious last night. We’ve all been really worried.” 

Peter winced at that. “I’m really sorry.” 

“What do you think you did wrong?” Aunt May looked at him, and oh god her eyes were red from crying earlier and it made him want to sink through the floor into a hole of misery. 

He picked at the blanket laying over his lap. “I lied and said I was at Ned’s when I wasn’t. And I didn’t tell anyone I was out as Spiderman. And I didn’t have backup, or have any way of asking for help if I got in over my head.” His shoulders curled inwards. “I was stupid.”

“Yes you were.” Aunt May agreed. “Are you ever going to do it again?” 

Peter touched his midriff. “No.” 

“Then we won’t talk about it again.” Aunt May leaned forward and kissed his head. “I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.” Her voice cracked. 

He hugged her as best he could with a tray on his lap, her awkwardly above him. But he managed it, his eyes burning with tears. “I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.” 

“I know.” Aunt May hugged him back before pulling back. “Now, I already called the school and said you have chicken pox.” 

Peter blinked. “Uh… I had chicken pox when I was four?” 

“Well high school doesn’t accept being clawed by werewolf as an excuse for missing class.” Aunt May gave him a look. 

He settled, it wasn’t like she was wrong. His eyes darted to Daisy, was very pointedly not looking at him. Peter ate his jello. He didn’t deserve the understanding and kindness from Aunt May. Definitely not forgiveness from Daisy after everything she’d done for him. So he ate his jello. 

Peter looked up from the soap opera May had put on the tv. Which he knew she had put it on knowing it bored him to tears. Passive aggressive for the win apparently. So the sound of the door was a sound of salvation. He beamed, a relieved exhale at the sight of Darcy. 

“Hey Dumb Dumb.” Darcy shoved a drink of some kind, probably super surgery and comforting into Daisy’s hands. 

He accepted the new nickname. “Hey.” 

“So I have news. MrWolfy is Jameson from the Daily Bugal’s son. He got a magic rock on the moon when he was doing his astronaut stuff. He's being held for observation for a month, but he’s doing fine. So the bullets, dendrotoxin and two entire cartridges of webbing and he’s doing better than you. And some bozo filmed most of the thing.” She passed May a cup of something hot and yummy looking. “News is calling him Man-Wolf. Which..who names these idiots?” 

Peter relaxed, she wasn’t mad at him. “Man-Wolf?” That was actually really bad. 

“Yup.” Darcy was jittery, and now that she was closer, sitting on the end of his bed actually, he could see the dark circles under her eyes. “Now, everyone is freaking out about the health of their favorite Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman.” 

He accepted he wasn’t going to be wearing the suit again for a while. And he wasn’t going to fight it. Not to mention even with the painkillers he felt sore. “Uh...I can’t really go back out there for...awhile. If I’m still allowed out there.” 

“We’ll slap your mask on you for one of your videos later.” Darcy reached out and flicked his nose. “Tony and I are fixing your suit so this never happens again.” 

Peter blinked. “What?” 

“Bulletproof clearly isn’t going to cut it.” Darcy’s eyes narrowed. “No dumb Man-Wolf is slicing you up again.” 

“You really don’t have to do that.” Peter’s face heated with shame, looking down at his lap. “It was my mistake.” 

Darcy reached out and tapped his cheek with an open palm. The gentlest of pats, but the fact the gesture was a slap no matter how painless still hurt. “You're my brother. If I can protect you I’m going to protect you. No if and or buts.” 

“I uh...oh...you still didn’t have to.” He poked at his blankets. 

She looked over at Daisy. “Speaking of Tony, he made an AI for you two heroic idiots. We’re incorporating it. But after Daisy takes a look and makes sure it doesn’t have any dumbass protocols.” 

“I’ll take a look and fix it.” Daisy pushed off the wall. “Can I borrow your laptop?” 

Darcy gave a sloppy salute. “Go for it. I’ve got the fort till you get back. I could use a break from suit building.” 

“Thanks.” Daisy gave Darcy a nod and then slipped out of the room. 

Peter groaned, letting his head fall back, eyes closing. “I deserved that.” 

“You really do.” Darcy replied without a hint of sympathy, which again fair. “That’s going to take some work Dumb Dumb. Your future training afternoons aren’t going to be fun.” 

Peter winced. “Can I help with the designs?” 

“You have a scheduled nap in twenty minutes, so no Dumb Dumb.” Darcy squeezed his non injured leg. She looked at May. “You want to take the chance to stretch your legs?” 

Aunt May smiled, setting her drink aside and stood with a slight groan. “I think I will.” She kissed his forehead. 

Darcy waited till May had left the room before turning and flicking his nose. “Wow you stepped in it.” 

“I know.” Peter groaned. 

Darcy gave a great dramatic sigh. “Yup, and it’s going to be worse for you.” 

“Huh?” He tilted his head slightly. 

She rolled her eyes. “Kid, look when I snuck out to get drunk, sleep with my boyfriend, smoke weed, that sort of thing my parents were just mad at me. I even stole the family car and hit the mailbox once. But you know they were just my parents.” 

“I...is there a moral to this?” He stared at her in confusion. 

Darcy huffed. “You’re not just May’s kid. You’re her whole family. I mean she’s kinda adopted Daisy and I, but she did that for you. You are all she has. And she’s way more involved with your life than most parents. I mean my mom barely could keep up with which band I was into. May learned to shoot a gun for you.” 

She reached out patting his shoulder. “And Daisy is a wreck of survivors guilt and angst around family. You just hit like... all of her buttons. This whole thing isn’t going to blow over for a while. Not because we’re mad at you, but because you scared us and we love you.” 

“I’m sorry.” Peter looked her in the eye. “I really am! I didn’t mean...I was trying to prove I didn’t need to be babysat and then...that bike messenger could have died if I wasn’t fast enough! And what if I’m not fast enough next time?” His blankets bunched under his hands. “People could have died and I...just made it about me.” 

Darcy sighed. “Even if you could get strong enough that none of us worried, which I’m pretty sure is impossible, would you even want to be? It seems kind of lonely to me. But what do I know, I’m the normal one.” 

“I don’t think you’re normal.” Peter’s lips twitched up. “But you’re probably right.” 

“I know I’m right. Now be a good little Dumb Dumb and start thinking sleepy thoughts. If you’re out before our angst bucket of a sister gets back you might not be stuck with angsty dreams.” 

Peter smiled, but let himself be bullied into being tucked in. “She’s not that bad.” 

“Oh she really is. Let’s not forget her ‘I’ll punch things with my shattered bones’.” Darcy’s eyes twinkled slightly. 

It hurt a little bit but he couldn’t help a laugh at that. But he waited for the joke to pass. “Are you mad at me?” 

“Eh, you were due for some teenage rebellion. You were making the rest of us look bad by comparison. And you got in trouble without me helping you. So no judgement.” Darcy smiled. “You’re my baby Dumb Dumb.” 

Peter closed his eyes, his chest felt all warm and fuzzy. “Thanks.” 

“Hey, it’s going to be alright. Even if you’re stuck eating jello. Which, urgh flubber much?” Darcy teased. 

He smiled. “We should watch Flubber.”

“Sounds fun Dumb Dumb.” Darcy patted his cheek. “Now budge up, I didn’t sleep at all last night and you have enough blankets to share.” 

Peter happily scooched over a bit so Darcy could squeeze in with him. She smelled nice, like something fruity and sweet and engine oil. It was a weird mix but it worked. And...he’d been scared, so very scared. But with Darcy squished in next to him..he felt safe. 

Peter sensed more than heard it when Daisy came back. He cracked an eye open, and there she was in the chair by the side of the bed. She was typing diligently away on Darcy’s laptop. Somehow she must have felt his eyes on her. Daisy looked up and she just stared at him for a long minute. And then she smiled ever so slightly. It felt a little bit like hope.


	24. Yuri is Not Drunk Enough For This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gotta say I enjoy this regular update thing. Or well being back to regular updates? Also Valhalla is an awesome game.

Daisy dropped the bag of takeout in front of Tony. It distorted the holotable’s image.

He startled back. “Offspring?” 

“You need food, caffeine, and to stretch before you keep working on the suit.” She dropped a hand to one hip and stared him down. “You’re going a little crazy.” 

“No I’m not.” Tony replied automatically. 

Daisy raised an eyebrow. “Instant Kill mode?” 

“And?” Tony leaned back slightly, though he had turned the holotable off. 

She hooked one of the rolly stools and yanked it over and sat down. “Open up the bag old timer, one of those burritos has my name on it. Also Babysitting mode?”

“He needs it.” Tony’s movements were jerky, stubborn as he opened up the paper bag and tossed her one of the burritos inside. 

Daisy considered her words while unwrapping her lunch. “When I was fourteen I was stealing money out of my foster mom’s purse and working on a plan to have myself emancipated. What were you doing at fourteen?” 

“Starting my first college degree and getting in some quality time with the house keeper’s daughter.” Tony narrowed his eyes. “I see your point, I don’t like it.” 

She let it wash over her. “And how would you have felt if anyone had set up some of the programs you’re made? Which you’ve been working on this for a while. Arrogant much?”

“You’re too wise to be my Offspring.” Tony rolled back. “But fair, I’d hate it.” 

Daisy looked at the images of the suit on the screens. “You’re missing the point you know. Peter’s better than either of us, he doesn’t need to be us.” 

“Not going to say you’re better than me too?” Tony deflected. 

She didn’t let him brush it off. “I’ve killed people, a lot of people and I don’t feel bad about it. The ones who died for me though… those ones stick with me.” Daisy considered her words. “We’ve both made mistakes, big mistakes. Ones that have gotten people killed. But that doesn’t mean either of us would have ever let someone put us on a leash. Am I wrong?” 

“No, you’re irritatingly right.” Tony chewed a bite of his burrito. “So what compromise of common sense are you about to bully me into? Am I turning into the nerdy kid who gets shut in lockers? Is this what that feels like?” 

Daisy stared at him. “No, it’s really not.” She smiled slightly though. “Think less Ironsuit, more...what is that?” 

“Oh you mean that suit? That’s yours.” Tony looked smug. “You didn’t think I’m only making a new suit for the Kid did you?” 

And that was...unexpected. Which probably said a bit about her, she hadn’t considered it. “My powers don’t play well with machinery.” 

“I know that Quaker Shaker, I’m wounded you think I wouldn’t think of that.” Tony leaned back slightly. “Adamantium weave, nothing short of vibranium is getting through. Impressed?” 

Daisy hummed looking at the screens. “You’re already synthesizing it?” 

“It’ll be ready by dinner. Also put magnets on the bottoms of your new boots. Less hanging off buildings by the scruff of your neck.” Tony took a bite of his burrito and was silent for a minute. “And you’re wrong about one thing Offspring.” 

“Oh, what’s that?” Daisy kicked at the floor, lightly letting herself spin in a circle. 

Tony looked at her and his eyes were...he looked at her like he cared. “Peter’s not the only one who’s better than me.”

And...well Daisy didn’t know what to say to that. So she didn’t say anything. But that was fine, Tony seemed to understand that too. 

Daisy knocked lightly before stepping into the medical room Peter was in. “I come bearing a gameboy, gatorade, a fresh spider mask and gloves, as well as sweatpants and a sweatshirt.” 

“Thank you for picking those up.” Aunt May stepped over and hugged her. 

“It’s no problem.” Daisy wasn’t used to a parental figure who hugged and showed affection as much as May. But well, she was adjusting. And it was..nice. Really nice. 

Darcy looked over from where she was sitting on the side of Peter’s bed. “Come on then. Let’s get this video done before we have Spiderman memorials or prayer circles or something.” 

Daisy tossed the bag at Darcy. “Whaddya need me to do?” 

“Be thyself Quaker Shaker. Maybe put on your mask, even if you are in a...is that my sweater?” Darcy’s nose wrinkled. “Keep it on, you make it look smoking.” 

“Thanks.” Daisy knew she needed to say something to Peter before they did anything. She stepped over and looked down at him. Blowing out a breath she reached out and ruffled his hair. “We’re going to have to work on your close quarters combat.” 

Peter perked up, a smile spreading across his face. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah.” She agreed, and god her family made her soft. “Next time no hiding, even if I’m recovering from bullet wounds.” 

He nodded eagerly. “For sure!”

“Good, I’m guessing Darcy briefed you on what to say?” She checked, cause honestly she kind of hated the press and just...it was not in her wheelhouse. 

Peter pulled on his mask. “Yup!” 

“Good, do that. And start thinking of thank you gifts for Pietro, he set back his physical therapy by a few days to get you here as fast as he did.” 

Peter’s goggles did the weird clicking squint that she’d learned to read as a cringe or wince. “Just a card isn’t going to cut it is it?” 

“It’s really not.” Daisy leaned against the bed. “It’s a good thing you’re going to have time on your hands.” She pulled out her mask and let it suction onto her face. “I was thinking since you’re a genius you could make him something.” 

Peter nodded, pulling on his gloves. “Yeah, that could be cool.” He looked a bit ridiculous in a hospital gown, spider gloves and mask. But it was probably what Darcy was going for. 

Darcy cleared her throat while pulling out the Spiderphone. “Alright fucks, say cheese.” 

Daisy rolled her eyes, but stayed leaning against the hospital bed and crossed her arms. If she was supposed to be herself, well she was grumpy. 

“Hey everybody!” Peter waved at the camera. “Just wanted to let you know I’m A-ok!” 

She couldn’t help it, she snorted. “Sure Jan.” 

“Hey!” Peter looked at her. “I’m not the one who got shot.” 

“I’m doing better.” Daisy’s lips twitched up. “You got clawed by a werewolf.” 

Peter shrugged, but his whole bearing said he was laughing at her. Which idiot. He turned back to the camera. “So don’t worry, probably won’t see me for a while.” 

“I’m tying you to your bed if you even think of going out there before the doctor gives you a clean bill of health.” Daisy reached out and pushed his head to the side gently. 

Peter laughed. “So uh sorry I won’t be there to help you with carrying your groceries and the usual everyone. But don’t worry I’ll get Quake here to keep up with the trick channel. She’s kinda awesome at that stuff even if she pretends she isn’t.” 

“I’m doing what?” She snapped her head back to her idiot brother. 

He had to be smiling under that stupid mask of his. “You’ve got like four blackbelts or something. And you’ve been getting into parkour.”

“Fine.” Daisy agreed, she noted Darcy looked absolutely delighted from where she was filming the thing on her phone. 

Peter leaned towards her while looking at the camera. “So sorry for scaring you all. I appreciate all the thoughts and prayers and everything. But I’m good, just going to be very sore for a while. Bye for now!” 

Darcy lowered the camera. “Good times guys. Those rumors of you being a couple, this isn’t going to help.” 

“Come on!” Peter pulled off his mask. “We can do it again.” 

Darcy sniggered. “Too late Dumb Dumbs.” 

Daisy ruffled Peter’s hair. The rumors protected him, the more people thought they were a couple the more nobody would expect Peter was a teenager. Afterall her age was publicly known. Also his indignation over it all amused her. “I’m sorry which sibling got spotted at a coffee shop with the Star Spangled Man with a Plan?” 

“Tony’s still having kittens over that.” Darcy slid the phone into her back pocket. “And please, one coffee shop visit is already being forgotten by the public consciousness. You on the other hand? Well I’ve got so much material.” 

Daisy shared a look with Peter. She nodded and then vaulted over his hospital bed. Grabbing Darcy she let out her best evil laugh. “You are our prisoner now!” 

////

Steve Rogers handed the newspaper to Bucky. “How’re you feeling today?” 

“Really Punk?” Bucky looked up at him, dark circles from another sleepless night, and general grumpiness from being stuck in the Hulk room for weeks now. Also with the missing arm, it left him slightly lopsided looking. 

He took his new customary seat. “Well Stark’s kids are kicking up the media again.” 

“Huh, Howard’s line would be…” Bucky trailed off. 

“They’re something alright.” Steve ran a hand through his still very pink hair. Which he was coming around on it. 

Bucky made a motion like he meant to check a holster that just wasn’t there. “The lawyer coming in again today?” 

“Yeah, not till later. But it’s looking good Buck.” Steve hated how just...awkward it felt sometimes. “It’s easier when there’s something to punch.” 

Bucky actually made a sound of amusement. “Of course you’d say that.” 

“What can I say, I had the right idea back in Brooklyn. Just didn’t know how many bullies there were out there.” Steve looked over at the paper. “I want the crossword.” 

Bucky huffed. “You just like getting punched.” 

“I got a lead on a Hydra bolt hole in Canada. Going to take a team up there. You going to be ok if I go?” Steve knew Bucky would be safe here in the tower. The Hulk room could take a bomb and stay safely shut. 

Bucky rifled through the paper before pulling out the crossword section and handing it over. “Don’t go doing anything too stupid. Clearly most of your common sense has already been beat out of you.” 

“Hey now.” Steve smiled though as he accepted the crossword and pulled out his pencil. “I’m pretty sure you kept most of the stupid with you.” 

“I’d come with you, watch your back.” Bucky didn’t need to say he couldn’t, that it wasn’t safe. 

He reached out and clapped his best friend on the shoulder. “You don’t have to fight anymore. I won’t let anyone make you.”

“There’s always a war Steve.” Bucky picked up his mug of black coffee. 

Steve looked at him. “Well, you can fight with Stark’s daughter. She’s fighting a war that won’t take pieces of your soul. Or require you to carry a gun.” 

“You’re the one who does the whole dancing monkey routine.” Bucky countered. 

He grinned. “I don’t know, Darcy wants to get her hands on your hair.” 

Bucky went unnaturally still. “You wouldn’t.” 

“Well someone has to check in on you and it’s that or nothing but therapists and lawyers.” Steve couldn’t help laughing at the horror on Bucky’s face. Besides, Darcy probably wouldn’t dye Bucky’s hair pink….probably. 

////

Darcy flipped through a magazine while waiting for FRIDAY to finish synthesizing the new fabric for the suits. “I’m turning into a Superhero fashionista. I’m a sexier Edna Mode.” 

“Huh huh.” Jane looked up from her notebook. “You like capes.” 

“Oh my Thor Janey! You recognized my reference!” She leaned forward with grabby hands and grabbed Jane. Halling her friend in, she smacked a loud kiss on Jane’s cheek. “I’m so proud!” 

Jane wiped at her cheek with her sleeve. “I wonder if anyone has used Thor’s cape to throw him around?” 

“Undoubtedly.” Darcy knew she was team Jane in the weird...sorta breakup they were in. “Can you imagine his face? I bet he looked like a kicked puppy.” 

Jane did look kinda smug. “A dumb one.” 

“The dumbest.” Darcy agreed as the bestest bro that she was. “So I have a date with a brainwashed Super Soldier. Thoughts on what offerings of food I should bring?” 

Jane rolled her eyes. “Pop tarts. Everyone loves pop tarts.” 

“Wanda doesn’t, which is so weird.” Darcy shook her head. “She’s not a fan of junk food.” 

Jane blinked owlishly. It was probably breaking her mind that someone didn’t live off processed, preservative soaked junk. “That’s something.” 

“I know. But between her and May, Daisy has learned to cook without explosions.” Darcy pressed her hands together in a mockery of prayer. “It’s a miracle. They don’t teach their agents to cook at SHIELD.” 

Jane stuck her pencil behind one ear. “Darcy, are you doing ok?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Darcy pushed her glasses up her nose. 

Jane stared at her. “Darcy.”

“I’ll be ok.” Darcy reached out grabbing her cup of coffee and cradling it. “Peter’s not even that hurt. Four puncture wounds to his right calf, his abdominal muscles and skin were fairly spredded, but thanks to Dr Cho he’ll be back on his feet in no time.” 

Jane passed her the redvine jar. “Is it bad I’m slightly disappointed there wasn’t enough werewolf left to see what Daisy would have done to it?” 

“It’d be a fluffy smear.” Darcy pronounced, and she meant it. “I kind of wish that could have happened too.” 

Darcy gave a salute to Pepper. “I’m going to miss you and Tony.” 

“I’m sure our time in Malibu will be cut short.” Pepper threw her an amused look while packing another dress into her open suitcases. “Hopefully you and your siblings can keep out of trouble for a whole twenty four hours?” Her voice was vaguely fond. 

Darcy tried to keep the gaping at the bedroom in check. Damn Tony be rich. “It’ll be good for Tony to get away from Bucky. Which I’m planning on crashing the Hulk room once you two are out of the tower.” 

Pepper stilled. “Darcy.” 

“What? It needs to happen. And with Cap taking off with two thirds of the planet side avengers to Canada it means Bucky’s just going to be sulking in there. I’m bringing comic books, Peter’s old gameboy, and an apple pie.” Darcy looked at her. “And I never met my grandparents so I’m not one emotional twitch away from doing something super stupid.” 

Pepper stepped to her, her heels clicking. Reaching out she touched the side of her face. “Promise me you’ll take Daisy with you.” 

“Oh my Thor that’s hilarious. Yes, I will totally do that.” Darcy ignored the implication she needed an enhanced bodyguard and not just Hunter. “You’re brilliant Pep!” 

////

Yuri knew something was wrong as soon as she opened her apartment door. Slowly pulling her service weapon out of her holster, she molded herself to the wall. The light in the kitchen was on. She was just coming around the corner when her gun was shoved up and then she was being slammed into a wall, gun twisted from her grip, and hand at her throat. 

She opened her mouth to...she didn’t know what only to still. “Quake.” 

“Detective Watanabe.” Her voice was cold, her eyes colder as she stared at her. “You should get a better lock on your door.” And then she dropped her. 

Yuri rubbed at her throat. She glared at the retreating back of the hero. “Sure, why don’t you just invite yourself in.” She only slightly stomped as she shut her apartment door and followed Quake into her tiny dining room. Pausing she looked at the second person in her apartment. “You’re that reporter.” 

“Amira Ahmed.” The woman waved. “And good to know I’m not the only who has these idiots breaking into her apartment.” 

She let out a sound of pure frustration. “Is there a reason you’re here or do I need to arrest you for breaking and entering?” 

“I was putting it off, but since you decided to pull Spiderman in as your new enhanced partner it’s time we talked.” Quake pulled out three beers from the fridge, like it was her apartment the ass, and set them on the table. 

Yuri crossed her arms. “Talk about what?” 

“The Maggia crime syndicate.” Quake’s fingers twitched and the bottle caps landed on the table. 

Amira took one of the beers. “I’m still chasing leads on the ATCU and their Hydra connections. I appreciate the invite, but I don’t have the time to chase a whole new nest of monsters. I’m busy enough and I just found a connection between the ATCU and the Navy.” 

Yuri’s breath was quick as she processed that. “The Maggia? How?” 

“I did research on the police Spiderman and I were going to have to work with. Law enforcement and vigilantis don’t have a historically good relationship. Nor does law enforcement have a good relationship with those of us from poor neighborhoods.” Quake shot her a glare daring her to argue. 

Yuri pulled a chair out and took a seat. “You know about my father then?” 

“That he was as dirty as they come and on the Maggia payroll? Yeah.” Quake took a drink from her beer. “But that’s not the only thing I found. You’ve gotten a negative reputation with your superiors. You got that reputation for the right reasons though. Hardline stance on corruption, organized crime, etc. And good enough your brass just keep passing you off instead of firing you.” 

She grabbed the offered beer. “So what, you think you can blackmail me?” 

“Nope. I’m offering to help you bring down the Maggia.” Quake replied dryly. “Also why would I bring a reporter to a blackmailing?” 

Yuri took a drink. “You blackmail people often then?” 

“Former SHIELD.” Quake waved at herself. “I’ve done a lot worse than blackmail.” 

Amira looked between then. “I’m sorry, clearly I’m not going to be particularly useful with this venture. But do you have to threaten each other?” 

“Sorry.” Quake’s mouth tightened slightly. “You don’t take Spiderman as your only backup again and I take down your mafia for you.” 

“Deal.” Yuri got the hostility. She’d gotten Quake’s partner hurt, badly, on her watch. Why Quake was willing to go after the mafia she didn’t know. Even the FBI didn’t do much to curtail them. But she wasn’t going to let a chance to have this kind of help slip by. “How do you think you can just hand me the Maggia?” 

Quake took a swig, her body relaxing ever so slightly. “SHIELD spy, remember? I figure we do this the mostly legal way.” 

“What I don’t know I can’t arrest for.” Yuri drummed her fingers on the table. “You mean it?” 

She nodded. “I mean it. I figured once things had calmed down we’d help you take care of it. But if you’re going to be dragging us in as your backup anyway? Well I’m more suited for your problems then Spiderman.” 

“Alright.” Yuri got up and opened up her gun safe. Pulling out the files she stepped back to the kitchen table and dumped the stack on it. “This is what I have so far. Nothing actionable without warrants or actual support from my bosses. But I’ve been keeping an ear to the ground.” 

“Which you don’t have.” Quake finished for her opening up the top file and frowning as she looked through it. “We’ll have to make sure the case we build is legal. But I’m technically a government consultant so that should help.” 

Amira spoke up. “I might be chasing other leads, but I can get you in contact with a reporter who can help. And one who’s actually from New York.” 

“That would be helpful. We’re also going to need to call in some other help if we want to do this without it spirling out of control.” Yuri took control of the meeting. This was her project afterall. “The Maggia are led by Don Vicente Fortunato, but there are four other Don’s in the organization. The one I’m worried about, and who will make your help incredibly valuable for,” She gave a look at Quake, “Is Joseph Martello. But since he became enhanced they’ve been calling him Hammerhead.”

Quake nodded. “I can handle him. He’s not even that enhanced, they just replaced his skull with steel.” 

“You’re willing to take down the families though? Because once you start you can’t stop. They won’t let you.” Yuri looked at the vigilante/superhero sitting at her table. She saw nothing but resolve. Huh, they were going to do this then.


	25. Paintball is Totally Romantic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, yes this is Tuesday night but I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off tomorrow so it was chapter now or like super late tomorrow. And well, I'm thinking about it now.

Wanda shared a confused look with Daisy before looking back to Darcy. “You want us to what?” 

“Play drinking games, watch movies and help me fix Barnes’s hobo hair. This evening, be there or be square. All that jazz.” Darcy pointed at Pietro. “And you! I expect your presence, we need male backup.” 

“Uh..” Pietro seemed to shake himself out of it, stupid grin on his face. “Anything you want Beautiful.” 

Wanda sighed, her brother’s terrible flirting was back then. But that wasn’t even… “Didn’t Barnes murder your grandparents?” 

“He was brainwashed.” Darcy waved a hand. “And he’s human. Leaving him in the nicest solitary confinement known to man, except for visits from therapists and a lawyer for an entire weekend is dumb.” 

Wanda had to admit that wasn’t the worst argument. Maybe she was just getting used to being dragged along by the Stark siblings? “Why us though?” 

“Because he murdered our grandparents and is a super assassin who’s like only a little way through having triggers removed. And between you three I’ll be perfectly safe.” 

Daisy made a small noise. “That’s not exactly terrible reasoning. In close quarters like that if he’s as good as I think he is he could probably take me. I could slow him down but…” 

“But with my powers to assist and Pietro to remove Darcy from danger we could handle him.” Wanda finished for her. 

Pietro rubbed at his thigh. “I’m still sore from saving Peter.”

“Obviously, we’ll probably just have a fun time dragging him from an angsty party pooper party.” Darcy shrugged. 

Daisy sighed. “Fine, Hunter stays with May and Peter if all of us are locking ourselves into the hulk room with Barnes.” 

“Already cleared it with my scruffy brit. Which not that I don’t get it. I mean accent, he’s reasonably hot. But Bobbie could do better.” Darcy theatrically sat down in the armchair. “Now, who wants to paint their nails? Cause I look pretty in blue.” 

Wanda accepted she was going to be getting tipsy with a super assassin. “Well red for me.” 

“I could go black again?” Daisy seemed to consider that. “Or yellow? Is yellow my new color now?” 

Wanda felt a flush as Daisy leaned against her. “You look good in yellow.” 

“Yellow babe.” Darcy winked at them. “And Pietro, don’t you think you’d look pretty in blue too?” 

Pietro seemed to read the challenge for what it was. “I think I would be too dashing in blue. You might just throw yourself at me Stark.” 

“Only thing I’ll be throwing your way is electricity hot stuff.” Darcy leaned forward. “And my army of minions, we have the whole weekend.” 

Daisy cleared her throat. “About that, I may have told Detective Yuri I’d help her take down the Maggia crime families. So I have some groundwork for that to get started on.” 

“You…” Darcy pinched the bridge of her nose. “Younger siblings, you’re all trouble.” 

Pietro grinned. “I know, they just find the most interesting of friends. I’m twelve minutes older you know?” 

Wanda’s powers swirled around her as she halted the spray of paintballs aimed at her head. She narrowed her eyes. “That wasn’t nice.” 

“Nope.” Daisy grinned and ducked back undercover before Wanda could chuck the paintballs back at her. 

She twisted her hand, letting the paintballs she’d caught spin above her hand in a circle. Her powers stayed whirling around her. Wanda started to run, she’d been in one place too long. Jumping, her powers caught her, carrying her over the street down below. She wasn’t sure how she felt about training involving running around buildings. It upped the stakes, and it made guessing where Daisy was going to come from a lot harder. 

Huffing, she bent backwards, paintballs harmlessly flying over her where her head and shoulders had just been. With her right hand she threw the paintballs that had been picking up speed as they spun around her hand. They shot faster then they’d been coming at her.

“Fuck!” Daisy yelped as she dropped straight out of the air.

Wanda gave herself a second to just breathe. Shit, Daisy was getting better and better at not vibrating anything except what she wanted to vibrate. It made it harder to locate her. 

“HEY!” 

Wanda looked down at the gaggle of teenagers. She hopped off the roof, her powers lowering her slowly. “Yes?” 

“Whaddya doing here?” A teenage boy chewing a lot of gum asked. 

She tilted her head slightly. “Patrolling with Quake?” 

“Can ya do a flip?” He asked, his accent was thick. Not that she could judge.

Wanda had never been asked that before. “No, not without my powers.” 

“That’s lame.” He booed, his friends grumbling in disappointment. 

Daisy dropped down beside them on the sidewalk, her vibrations barely brushing past them. “Flips?” 

“I can’t do that. Though I have a feeling I will be able to if I continue to spend time with you and Spiderman.” Wanda had already been pulled into ‘helpful’ stretching and strength training with Pietro. 

Daisy laughed and then turned, she used the building wall behind them to run up and flip over. It was...really impressive. 

There were appreciative oos. One kid, with an Ironman t-shirt bounced forward, sticking a water bottle on his head. “Can you kick it off without hitting me?” 

Daisy did a spinning kick, sending the water bottle flying against the wall of the building. She looked at the kids with an amused look as they cheered. “Alright, now what are you four doing out here? I know you’re skipping school, but have you eaten at all?” 

“Ya not going to tell us to go back to class?” Their ring leader asked. 

And Wanda couldn’t help being curious about that as well. 

Daisy looked at them. “Well, you should be in school. But I’d be a bit of a hypocrite to judge you for that. However, you know the hotdog stand down the block?” 

“Yeah?” Ironman tshirt kid replied, face scrunched up slightly. 

“Tell Mr Donavan I sent you and he’ll make sure you eat. Now get on with you. And stay safe you hooligans.” Daisy winked at Wanda before shooting back up to the roofs. 

Wanda easily lifted herself back up. As she landed on the roof she walked over to Daisy. “Do you do that often, pay for people’s lunches?” 

“A bit.” She leaned against the brickwork. “Didn’t your brother steal to help the people in your old neighborhood?” 

Wanda smiled while shaking her head. “I always knew he was going to get himself shot.” 

“Speaking of your other half, he should talk to Aunt May about work. They always need volunteers at FEAST, and they might be hiring. It seems like something he’d like.” 

Wanda settled next to Daisy, bumping their shoulders together. “He’d like that.” She didn’t know how to articulate her...just how much she valued this small family that had accepted her and her brother. What Daisy in particular’s friendship meant to her. It was… “May I show you something?” 

“Why wouldn’t you be able to?” Daisy looked at her, head tilted to one side.

Wanda bit at the inside of her lip. But...she found not being able to communicate with her abilities left her unable to communicate sometimes. It was funny how integral they were to her now. They were an extension. “I mean show you.” She let her powers swirl around her fingers, raising a hand. 

“Oh.” Daisy looked at her and then nodded. “Ok.”

She hadn’t expected that. But she was grateful for it. Wanda raised her hand slowly, giving Daisy time to change her mind. Her friend didn’t flinch however. Wanda’s fingers hovered next to the side of Daisy’s head. The red light flickered, sinking into her. And then Daisy’s eyes glowed red and Wanda shared possibly too much. 

Wanda left her emotions bare. Affection, gratitude, that healing ache of loss, the purpose she was finding after the anger had been burned out, everything. The ugly things and the good. All of it. Just the honest truth of herself. An equal gesture of trust as the one Daisy had made letting her into her head.

Daisy’s eyes, lit with the red of Wanda’s powers widened, her mouth opening ever so slightly. As the red light faded all the way till it was just Daisy’s warm brown eyes looking back at her, Daisy’s expression remained. It wasn’t anything Wanda knew how to read. Not without feeling for it and that wasn’t her choice to reach for. 

She lowered her hand and swallowed. Wanda felt she may have revealed more than she should have. This was...it could go so wrong. But it was done. And she didn’t regret it all the same.

Daisy’s eyes flicked across her face. Then she reached out, hand catching Wanda’s face between her hands leaning in and pressing their lips together. 

The breath caught in her throat. Pulling back Wanda pressed their foreheads together. “Are you sure?” 

“No.” Daisy had a sort of helpless laugh in her voice. “But I’m not going anywhere.” 

////

Bucky startled to his feet when the door to his secure room burst open. He aborted his instinctive reaction to vault over the couch and attack. Not a threat. Well...not the type of threat he was used to. But four college aged kids carrying boxes of stuff into his room didn’t seem normal. He cleared his throat. “You shouldn’t be here.” 

“Oh I’m very much supposed to be here.” The curvy brunette who was leading the others replied. And oh that was Darcy Stark. 

He took a step back, edging away. “Stevie didn’t say anything about more than just you coming to check in.” 

“Duh, I didn’t tell him.” Darcy flipped some of her hair over one shoulder. “But let’s be honest here, you murdered my grandparents so just coming in on my own seems pretty dumb. No offence or anything.” 

Bucky stilled and then had to nod. Actually, that one with the red sweater was the Scarlet Witch kid, and the one right by Darcy’s elbow was Quake. And the man with them, he was the one who went really fast. “Smart, you brought people who could kill me without touching.” 

“Partially, also cause they’re just part of the team at this point. And I looked at your schedule. I mean dude, you need a beer, some pizza and a night not about your tragic angst backstory. You rock the sad puppy eyes, but no one can only be sad all the time.” Darcy lifted what was clearly a six pack of beer and set it on the table. “I even got special Norse mead for you.” 

“Norse mead?” Bucky repeated slightly dumbly. Because what? 

Quake, or well Daisy moved forward with that smoothness of someone trained in combat. “We’re not going to get drunk on you if you’re not getting drunk with us.” 

“You want me to get drunk with you?” Bucky noted Wanda and Pietro setting down a lot of pizza, and oh that was more than just a single sixpack. He couldn’t help how he categorized threats. Even if he’d had his arm he wouldn’t be able to win. The others might only subdue him temporarily, but Quake's eyes said she’d put him down like a mad dog if it was required. Without hesitation.

Darcy shoved a glass into his hand. “Dude, you need some normality in your life. And we have some classic movies from your OG time. I’d say resistance is futile but that seems like something creepy asshole octo-fascists would say.” 

And well...he just sort of blinked. No wonder Steve just went with the pink hair thing. Howard’s grandkid was a damn force of nature. “You are...not what I was expecting.” 

“What? Expecting weird facial hair and an impulse to shoot you into the sun?” Darcy pulled out what was definitely a jug of mead. 

Daisy snorted. “Howard and Tony did have ridiculous facial hair. I wonder if the curse will strike with Peter?” 

“He is at that age to experiment with terrible facial hair.” Darcy pronounced. She looked over at Pietro. “You had some really dumb facial hair when you were a teen didn’t you?” 

Wanda spoke up. “He tried, I made him shave it. It looked like a dying caterpillar on his lip.” 

“I was a boy then. Now I am a man and have had my facial hair called ruggedly sexy.” Pietro pulled out a tiny bottle of blue paint. 

Bucky stared at them. He wasn’t going to be able to understand this chaos. But..it wasn’t Vision creepily looking in, or another therapist...and it wasn't setting anything off? So...maybe it wouldn’t be bad? 

Bucky felt himself loosening more than he could remember doing. It was warm and he felt sorta floaty. The film I Walked With a Zombie, had long since finished. The pizza boxes were mostly empty, and they were sitting around the table. And...he...he felt warm to be allowed into their fun. They all seemed so painfully young. Even if physically he fit in with them his soul didn’t feel like it did.

“Right, my turn.” Darcy straightened up, her shoulders wiggling slightly. “Never have I had super powers.” 

“Oh cheater!” Daisy protested, but all of them still drank.

Pietro brandished his fifth beer of the evening. “Ok, Never have I been a girl.” 

Darcy raised her middle finger at him while drinking. Daisy and Wanda both groaned as they did as well. 

Wanda glared at her brother. “Never did I date a Hydra agent.” 

“That hurts. She was cute and there were not many options in Strucker’s castle.” Pietro grumbled while taking a drink. 

Bucky was glad not to be drinking on that one. Only… Daisy was drinking too. He couldn’t help looking at her questioningly. 

Daisy lowered the beer from her mouth. “Grant fucking Ward. He was my SO in SHIELD, also Hydra scum. I emptied a clip into him, and stabbed him. Coulson had to crush his chest with his robotic arm on an alien planet to get rid of him. He was hard to kill.” 

Bucky tapped their drinks together. There wasn’t much to say to that. Wanda reached out laying a hand on Daisy’s shoulder briefly. 

“My turn then.” Daisy held his eyes. “Never have I been mind controlled to harm the people I love against my will.” And then she drank. 

Something unclenched in him as he drank as well. 

“Does being lied to by an evil robot and convinced to assist it in destroying the world count?” Pietro asked, his eyes rather bleary. 

Darcy leaned against the coffee table heavily. “No, cause you just got conned. He got whatever the fuck Hydra bullshittery drug, chair, torture nightmare. And she had an alien parasite in her head.” 

“Fine, well Never have I worked for Hydra.” Pietro grinned stupidly. 

“That’s all of us.” Wanda looked at her brother like she was considering whacking him. “We have all worked for Hydra.” 

Daisy’s head tilted. “I mean SHIELD ended up as Shieldra. So that tracks.” 

“I’ll have you know I never never worked for Hydra.” Darcy protested. “I didn’t let Hydra experiment on me and then send me out against the Avengers. And no Hydra kidnapping and brainwashing into a sexy murderbot. Oh and I said ‘poo poo to you’ to Shieldra.” She beamed at them all. “Which means drink suckers.” 

Bucky snorted, he couldn’t help it. He just couldn’t and he laughed from deep in his gut. 

“You're not shaving my hair off.” He used his one arm to keep Darcy from approaching him with the shavers. 

Daisy spoke up from where she was slumped on the couch, head on Wanda’s shoulder. “I don’t know, just give him a hair band and let him do the manbun.” 

“Manbun?” He looked between the sisters in confusion. 

Wanda shared a look with Pietro. “Isn’t that just a normal bun?” 

“Yeah, but it’s sexier on a dude.” Darcy said solemnly. “You’ve got hobo hair Barnes.” Her head lolled to one side. “We can trim some of the dead ends, give you some shampoo for giving it more body and if you pull it back into a bun in public you should be good.” 

He looked between the kids. “So I won’t have pink hair?” 

“Nope, but we brought nail polish. How do you feel about pink to match Capsical’s hair?” Darcy brandished a bottle of the stuff. 

Bucky...felt like this might have been what he used to feel like at the dancehalls before...everything. “Fine Doll, but I only have one hand so you’re going to have to help me.” 

////

Peter waved into the camera on his laptop. “Hey, so uh what’s our project?” 

-”We have to write essays on a law or bill of some kind. Then we give a presentation on it in two weeks.”- Ned explained from his end of the skype call. -”And we have to have a power point and everything.”-

Michelle looked up from whatever she’d been doodling on her end. -”I think we should challenge ourselves and do it on the Boundaries resolution being argued about in the UN. It’s relevant to our lives and actually interesting.”-

-”I mean I think that would be cool?”- Ned adjusted his headphones.

Peter perked up, that would actually be useful. “Yeah that sounds great. I mean uh… it would be good. I actually read it the other day.” 

-”Interesting. Ned?”- Michelle asked. 

-”Huh?”- Ned blinked. -”Oh yeah I read it after I heard about it. Seems kinda crazy to prevent international travel for enhanced.”-

Peter sipped his juice, from the twisty straw. “You Michelle?”

-”Duh, I live for the countries of the world shooting themselves in the foot. And I thought I told you to call me MJ?”- She stared at the camera pointedly.

He winced. “Sorry, still getting used to that MJ.”

-”You can do more of the research since you’re at home.”- MJ blew off. -”So we’re against the measure right?”-

Peter bit at his lower lip. “Well uh...it’s not wrong? I mean it's not about enhanced, it’s about vigilantism and the Avengers. It let’s countries protect their sovereignty.” 

-”You support it?”- Ned stared at him in disbelief, MJ’s eyes had sharpened. -”But your sister is...well uh your sister.”-

He frowned slightly, he’d listened to Daisy and Darcy arguing about the bill before. -”Well we can’t just tell other countries they have to let our citizens in. It’s like… with great power comes great responsibility. So shouldn’t heroes follow laws? And there’s a clausal exception for world ending threats. So if Loki opens a portal into France the Avengers can still go there and help without asking. They’d just have to have those actions tried after the event.” 

-”But the delay is going to get people killed?”- Ned’s face scrunched up in confusion. -”They’re heroes.”-

Peter wasn’t sure how to put his thoughts into words. He knew Daisy was nervous about legal oversight, but also accepted it was needed even if imperfect. And Darcy...Darcy talked a lot about the rights of nations, equality under law and international treaties. Also like horrifying ramifications if enhanced weren’t treated like most people. Or well without defined exceptions. She was very passionate. 

Which left him...well it affected him. “The UN has to do something doesn’t it? And this one doesn’t promote like imprisonment for enhanced who don’t fall into line. Individual countries get to make their own decisions. Which in some cases is going to be bad. But it’s their choice to make bad decisions. If that makes sense?”

-”So if a country chooses to let their citizens die it’s their right?”- Ned spoke slowly. -”But that’s dumb.”-

MJ spoke up. -”But not without extensive precedent. Huh, the right to be stupid.”-

Peter nodded. “I can pull up info. Like it’s weird we’re trying to take away international sovereignty but just with enhanced people right?”

-”But that would...it would let powerful countries take control of enhanced and force them to comply or be locked up.”- MJ’s straightened slightly in her chair, picking up a rubix cube and picking at it. -”The Accords would have given the US, Russia and the other members of the World Security Council the ability to police enhanced all over the world. They’d have a pet army of enhanced to fight for them or never get out of jail. All enhanced under the thumb of a few countries. Kinda diabolical.”- 

Ned let out a whistle of air. -”Holy shitnuggets. And General Ross would’ve had the Avengers.”-

“So this one is...it puts limits but maybe they’re good limits.” Peter looked directly into the camera. And he was relieved to see his friends nodding along with him.


	26. Mad Science is Done

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup!

Darcy was distinctly excited as she watched her version 8.2 fold out exactly as it should. “It’s looking good Janey.” 

“The programing is running.” Jane looked up. “Let’s run test number two hundred and seventy six.” 

She picked up Sheep-E the sacrificial robot. “May you live and bring us the results we’re hoping for. That or die well my little friend.” Darcy solemnly set the robot in the middle of the portal base. Her array looked like clawed fingers from a hand the size of a lazy boy armchair reaching up from the metal base. It had a skeletal look, it needed some body work if it worked to look less super villainy. 

“Sheep-E, really?” Jane looked over the computer at her. 

Darcy winked. “He’s our sacrificial lamb to the stability of our rainbow bridge. May his sacrifice not be in vain.” She stepped carefully out of range of possible explosion and behind the reinforced glass next to Jane. “Ok, let’s make a wormhole.” 

“Nothing snappy about how we might be going mad scientist?” Jane asked her, all fond amusement with brilliant excitement bubbling underneath. 

“Hit the big red button Janey, we’re making a wormhole! We passed mad scientist a while ago.” 

Jane hit the button. 

There was a swirl of colors, the air being sucked into a wormhole of rainbows and then it collapsed into itself and Sheep-E disappeared into it. In the other room they heard Selvig start cheering. Darcy and Jane shared looks of glee. And ran for the other room. 

Darcy laughed out loud as she saw Sheep-E sitting in the other room’s containment lab. It wasn’t even smoking. “Holy Tamales! We did it!” She sprinted into the containment room and slid to Sheep-E and picked it up. Oh it was beautiful. Opening up it’s control panel she took a look. It was still running. 

Darcy was giggling into her sparkling cider as she scrolled through the data on the effects the wormhole had on her baby. She plugged Sheep-E into her laptop. It would take a while to download everything. Spinning in her wheelie chair she pouted at Jane. “Why’s it take so long! I’m talking with legal and PR after this.” 

“You’re the one trying to bushwhack the government.” Jane’s attention didn’t waver from the readings from their sensors in the testing room. 

Darcy let her head fall back. “I need a time machine Janey.” 

“We’re already bending space, theoretically time is a part of that.” Jane mentioned. 

Darcy blinked, it wasn’t like she hadn’t known that. “You know what, I’m gonna pretend I don’t know that. The temptation, Janey. Should I thank Thor that I’m in engineering instead of your weird space science?”

“We’re not inventing time travel.” Jane paused, her head tilting the side. “Although traveling forward in time wouldn’t be that big of a step from our current work. Backward time travel would be more difficult...but theoretically our work could be adjusted…” She trailed off as her mind no doubt ran faster than a human head should. 

Darcy hopped up and forced a flute of sparkling cider and a pop tart under Jane’s nose. “No time travel. Don’t you want rainbow bridges?” 

“Right, food for thought though.” Jane sipped at her victory cider and went back to reading the data. 

Her shoulders slumped in relief. “Almost created a monster there.” Darcy patted Jane on the shoulder. Maybe check on the prototype again before meeting the lawyers? Yes. That sounded good. 

Darcy dropped face down across the foot of Peter’s bed. She let out a sound like a dying whale. 

“Hi Dory, I didn’t know you spoke whale.” Peter lowered his gameboy. “You alive?” 

She cracked an eye open at him. “Did you just Nemo me?” 

“You would not be fishtaken to think so.” Peter pulled an earbud out.

Darcy rolled on her side. “I’m so proud.” She wiped an imaginary tear from her eye. “How’s convalescing.” 

“It’s uh going good? Finished my schoolwork for today. Oh! And maybe if it’s cool with you I could help with the new suit I know you and Tony are making?” Peter turned the big brown puppy eyes on her. It was devastatingly effective even if he was a little shit. 

She rolled onto her back, staring at the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling. “Duh, you gotta know what it’s going to do. Not going to send you out with tech you don’t understand. And know it’s only your adhesive power and the fear of my fury keeping you out of a spider themed Ironman suit.” 

“But Ironman suits are so cool!” His pout increased somehow. 

Darcy snorted. “Kid you’ve got like all the powers.” She held up her hands and began to count off fingers. “Super strength, agility, spidersence which is just limited precognition, adhesive abilities, durability, healing factor, and I’m probably forgetting something. You don’t need a suit to let you punch Thor. You need a suit so when the next werewolf scratches you, you don’t end up as a doggy chew toy.” 

“At least I’m not feeling fluffy? Cause magic moon rock.” Peter set his gameboy to the side and shifted. “For like an hour I was convinced you were going to have to lock me in the hulk room on full moons.” 

Darcy couldn’t help but laugh at his face. “We’d have gotten you your very own muzzle and leash. Videos of you chasing your tail, take you for walkies. So many missed opportunities.” 

“You suck.” Peter picked up one of the half dozen pillows May had stuffed onto his bed, and whacked her in the face with it. 

She grabbed it, sitting up and glaring at him. “If you weren’t injured Dumb Dumb.” 

“I’d be out of bed if anyone would listen to me.” Peter’s cheeks puffed. 

Darcy raised a brow at him. “You’d be out of bed if you weren’t a Dumb Dumb. However, my curiosity is killing me. What is the big box in the corner?” 

“A stuffed spider the size of a labrador and a Starkpad.” Peter looked at it with an odd look on his face. “I don’t get it. Tony doesn’t even talk to me.” 

She sighed, of course it was. Standing up she went and hauled the giant spider out of the box. “It’s his way of showing he cares. He just doesn’t know what to do about it.” 

“I mean..he actually does stuff with you.” Peter’s hair fell over his eyes slightly. 

“Because I’m an adult he can’t escape and who spends eight to twelve hours a day in his monument to his ego they call Stark Tower.” Darcy dumped on the spider on the foot of his bed. “It took a lot of effort for him to process you’re a teenager and not a mini adult. Sadly that’s making him twitchy. But he does care, a lot. You think I was the only one in the lab making sure you have a new suit to keep you safe.” 

Peter twitched slightly. “What do I do with it?” He pointed towards the spider. 

She reached out and wiggled it’s mandibles. “Look at the adorable fluffy little mandibles! You love it and name it and accept this is how poorly socialized manchild disasters like Tony show they care.” 

“It’s just…” He flopped back onto his pillows dramatically. “He was my hero. He saved me at that Expo and then he was just always there on the news and…”

Darcy sighed. “And you thought that meant he was incredible in every way, not just certain ways.” 

“It’s dumb.” Peter muttered. 

“No it’s not.” Darcy disagreed softly. “You should probably prepare yourself for something truly ridiculous for christmas though. Personally I’m hoping Pepper restrains him and I just end up with a car.” 

Darcy waltzed down the stairs. She grinned at Hunter leaning on the kitchen counter sipping coffee while chatting with May. “Sup older people.” 

“Hey! I’ll have you know I’m in the prime of my life.” Hunter countered. 

She grinned at the opening. “Just means you’re peaking. All downhill from here.” 

“Well you’re just nuttier than I thought, that’s what that proves.” Hunter blinked as a cutting board and several tomatoes were set in front of him. “What’s this?” 

May just continued to bustle around. “Start chopping, I know you’re staying for dinner.” 

Darcy just beamed. “You are a legend May Parker.” 

“I don’t know about that. But thank you. Now could you come and start washing the potatoes?” May went back to whatever was on seering over the oven top. 

She rolled up her sleeves. “Sure thing. What are we making anyways?” 

////

Yuri rapped her fingers against the steering wheel of the surveillance van. Of course Quake was late. She was starting to wish it was the vigilante who cracked puns and never shut up helping her this time. No, it would be worth it. Hopefully. If Quake bothered to show up. She was considering using her cellphone to call the number Quake had given her when there was a knock on the passenger door. 

She looked over and internally groaned, junkie. And then the passenger door opened and the junkie slid into the van. 

“I’m not a dealer.” Yuri’s hand rested on her concealed weapon. 

The door snapped close and a familiar individual huffed. “You do know this van screams surveillance op right? What is with government vehicles basically having ‘government’ slapped on them?” 

“Quake?” Yuri startled as she realized yes this was the hero/vigilante. 

She had to be wearing a wig because she had long black hair reaching past her elbows. Dark, smeared on makeup, holey beanie on her head, fishnet shirt pulled over black bra, worn leather jacket swallowing her up. Her jeans were torn, old dirt embedded in the fabric. Everything about the woman said she’d slept on the street. 

“Never heard of undercover?” Quake’s lips curled up into a smug smirk. 

Yuri made a ‘huh’ sound in the back of her throat. “You’re late.” 

“Well this took a bit to get into.” Quake shrugged. “So you have the bugs?” 

She pulled out the case and passed a comm. “I don’t know how you swung that warrant, but it came through.” 

“I’m friends with a Stark, money is magic.” Quake put in her comm and flipped open the case and checked the bugs were all in place. And then started stowing them in the inner pockets of her leather jacket. “I dropped a line to Daredevil. Hopefully he’ll distract the Maggia from our investigation.” 

Yuri took the case back, sliding it under her seat. “Are you good to go?” 

“I’m good.” Quake cracked her neck. “It’s been a while honestly. I’ve got work at four though so let’s get this done.” 

Yuri actually paused at that. “You have a day job?” 

“You think I just jump around rooftops? You do know the closest to pay I get for that is a free churro or like Mrs Bak gives us dumplings sometimes.” Quake looked at her like she was an idiot. 

And...Yuri relaxed, huh, so the super hacker wasn’t abusing her skills. It was...nice to be right about someone. “Stay safe, don’t get clawed.” 

Quake huffed. “I got this.” 

Yuri chewed on her ham on rye sandwich. “If we bring in too many people someone will snitch.” 

“Weird to hear a cop say the word ‘snitch’ negatively.” Quake dunked some of her fries in some ketchup. Without her leather jacket on, and beanie no longer on her head she was looking far more like a prostitute than a druggie. It was kinda staggering the ease with which Quake switched presentation. It had definitely gotten her into the sleazy real estate office without a hitch though.

She flipped the page in the file. “We still have to get access to one of the Don’s offices. I can get a warrant with your magic Stark connections. But once we hit an office we have to have a SWAT team, others come in on the investigation and they’ll know we’re coming for them.” 

“I’m a specialist.” Quake looked at her while munching on her fries. “We just have to ‘rob’ his offices. I can get through whatever gangsters are in there without using my powers. If we make sure the warrant permits me to just go in, I can go in instead of SWAT.” 

Yuri just...she hated secret agent bullshit. People shouldn’t be able to do that. “You’d still have to get in and out without getting shot.” 

“Do you see what I’m wearing? They’ll let me in. I get to someone important’s office. Knock them out. Get into their computer system and loot the files. Then I can just walk back out.” Quake laid out. “If we want to make a point I could go through and beat the shit out of a lot of mafia minions.” 

And well, there was a point to that. “We’re not doing the second idea. It leaves you too open with no bullet proof suit.” 

“If you can find out what type of person would be allowed into any high priority locations run it by me. I’m not a long term undercover type, and hooker isn’t universally applicable and it’s getting cold out.” Quake tapped a finger on the table. “I haven’t gotten to do a valley girl in a while actually.”

Yuri was thankful for a chance to stuff the idiot hero into a bulletproof vest under her clothing. It nearly gave her hives letting Quake plant the bugs in her current get up. “I’ll keep that in mind. Let’s see what we get from the bugs. There’s a warehouse they’re using. I don’t have cause for a warrant but I’m working on it.” 

“I’ll email you a chat link.” Quake finished the last of her fries. “And I’ll keep my ear out for anything useful.” 

“Same.” Yuri held out her hand. “See you soon?” 

Quake accepted her hand and shook it. “I’ll message you later.” 

////

May hated writing grant proposals. It was dry, required perfection, and was so detail oriented. She was relieved to hear a knock on her office door. “Come in!” 

A familiar head of white hair popped in. “Hey Mrs Parker, Wanda said you could use some help around here?” 

“We could always use some help.” She stood up and walked around. “It’s good to see you here Pietro.” 

He grinned. “Well how could I miss spending time with a lady as lovely as you?” 

“Flatterer.” She patted his cheek. “Come on, we need help cleaning the kitchen after lunch.” 

Pietro easily followed behind her. “I can clean.” 

“Good, let’s introduce you to everyone and there’s some paperwork you need to sign.” May led him towards their kitchens. 

May sipped at her afternoon cup of tea. She was enjoying the melted puddle on her office couch that had once been a super hero. “Doing alright over there?” 

“So many boxes.” Pietro groaned. He peeked over at her. “Can you drive me home? I don’t think I can walk.” 

She should have known. “You ran here? No wonder you’re exhausted. You’ll just have to come home with me for dinner. Hunter can drive you back after his shift guarding Darcy.” 

He gave her a weak wave. “You just bring us all home and feed us don’t you?” 

“It’s nice to have a full house.” May had missed that. Not that her home had ever been particularly full. It’d always just been her and Ben. And then Peter was with them and their home had been full and happy. But since Ben...it was good to have family. Family that wasn’t just a teenage boy growing up too fast. 

Pietro’s eyes closed again, he was being dramatic about all the boxes he’d carried trying to impress Katie. “No offence to you Mrs Parker but I don’t think I’d want to work here. It is good but..”

“Not for everyone all the time.” She agreed easily. “Do you know what you want to do?” 

Pietro was oddly quiet. “Is this what you always wanted to do?” 

“Not at all.” May smiled as he looked at her curiously. “I wanted to be a concert pianist. I was good, but I wasn’t great. And then well, I got a job as a secretary at the community college. When this position opened I decided to take it and I like it here. The work I do here is important, and I’m good at it.” 

She looked at the young man. “I’ve learned something about you hero types. You need something a bit more high stakes than carrying boxes of canned food.” 

“I think I will come volunteer here though. Today was good.” Pietro folded his hands behind his head. “Do you mind?” 

May smiled, letting her chin rest on one hand. “Sweetie, we're always happy to have the help. Just remember to sign the paperwork I showed you.” 

“You’re pretty awesome Mrs Parker.” Pietro blew a kiss at her. 

She outright laughed. “You young man are going to give me grey hairs aren’t you?” 

“Probably.” He grinned, completely unrepentant. 

May leaned back in her chair and looked back at her grant paperwork. It could hold a little while later. And it felt like the kid needed an adult to talk to. “You do know Darcy won’t let anyone give you a hard time for living in the Tower right? There’s no rush to find something to do.” 

“I know, I have learned she’s as fearsome as she is fabulous.” Pietro winked before falling more serious, his eyes focusing somewhere around the motivational poster taped on the front of her desk. “I do not like depending on Stark for room and board.” 

May sighed. “At least for now it cannot be helped. But ask what you want to do with your time. You’re a hero, that means you may need a job that lets you have something without stakes to give yourself a break. Or you may want something that is heroic in it’s own right. But that’s something you have to ask yourself.” 

“You give good advice.” Pietro sat upright. “Thank you it’s been… Clint and Laura are good people. But he’s…” 

Her life had become so odd. “But he’s friends with a man you hate and pretending to be retired.” 

“I wouldn’t say hate...necessarily.” Pietro spoke slowly. 

“Hate takes time to fade sometimes. You and your sister have been through things I can’t even imagine. You’re allowed to have complicated feelings about it.” May sipped from her tea. “And Tony Stark is...well he certainly inspires strong feelings in others.” 

May passed a mug of hot tea to Daisy. “So is there a reason you’re not playing whatever battle royale game that the boys are playing?” 

“Not feeling it.” Daisy’s hands curled around her cup of tea. Her eyes never leaving where Peter and Pietro were jockeying each other on the couch. “I talked to May, my May today. It’s just been a while.” 

May moved so she was standing besides her honorary niece. She gently bumped their shoulders together. “She’s your mom.” 

“Yeah...yeah she is.” Daisy was biting at the inside of her cheek as she turned her head towards May. “Is that...alright with you?” 

And oh. May reached out wrapping an arm around Daisy’s shoulders. “You have so many people who love you! How could I ever resent that?” She squeezed, smiling at the suspiciously misty eyes of the girl. “Besides, I figure I’m just adopting a couple of nieces to live with me.” 

“Yeah?” Daisy’s voice was wet. 

May hugged her even tighter. “There’s never too much family.” 

“Do you think I could invite some of the team to Thanksgiving?” Daisy asked hesitantly. 

She smiled. “You’ll have to help me find a bigger table...or actually we’ll have to use the Tower. But that’s more than fine. They’re your family too.”


	27. Is Blackmailing a Politician Bad?

Peter chewed on his stick of licorice. He was tucked in on the couch, anytime he so much as twitched it felt like more pillows or blankets appeared. Daisy was curled up on the beanbag she’d dragged home weeks ago. Aunt May had just sighed over it when she’d spotted it. Daisy’s laptop perched against her legs. Darcy meanwhile was cross legged on the floor adjusting the new web shooters. Bits of webbing lay around the carpet. 

Frowning as he read through the specs on the new suit on his clunky laptop he broke the silence. “Why are there just chunks missing?” 

“Oh the gaps in the code?” Daisy checked from her position, she nabbed a new redvine from the tub. “That’s stuff Tony put in I cut out. We’re not giving an AI access to something called ‘instant kill’. Also the suit shouldn’t be able to act independently of you.” 

Peter looked at the...many large chunks of programming just missing. “I can’t really help with this.” 

“I know Itsy Bitsy.” Daisy replied. “But I do need your A-ok on what we are putting into this thing.”

He scrolled to web cartridges. The new set up would automatically reload, and would change cartridges based on type automatically. “Do you think I could make dendrotoxin webs?”

Darcy hissed as more webbing hit one of the lamps. “Tony’s fucking systems are not built for this.”

“Dendrotoxin webs?” Peter tried again. 

“Kid that’s your area of expertise, not ours.” Daisy looked up. “I mean all the magic potions and chemical concoctions are your wheelhouse.” Her head tilted to one side. “I could give you Jemma’s number? 

He perked up at that. “Your biochem friend you’re always calling?” 

“I call her a couple times a week.” Daisy corrected. “And yeah she graduated with her doctorates at like seventeen. But she’d actually understand the chemical goop you make for your webs.” 

“She’s got a point.” Darcy chimed in. “Tony’s and my options for webbing are mechanical, we’re changing how the web is shot to create different effects.” 

Peter hummed. “That’d be cool. You're sure she’d have time to talk to me though? I mean she’s head of the labs with SHIELD isn’t she?” 

“Would you take the time to help a six year old with their homemade rock candy experiment?” Daisy asked, sounding smug. 

And yeah, yeah he would. Besides, webs were super cool. “Right, makes sense. Actually side question. What are we calling the AI? Cause it’s going to need a name or else I’ll feel bad.” 

“Eventually yeah, it’d be weird to call it a natural voice interface everytime.” Daisy winked at him. “What do you think we should call it?” 

Peter hummed, letting his head fall back. “Well...she was supposed to be like our babysitter right? Before you yelled at him? So why not...Karen?” 

“I can give her a middle aged lady voice.” Daisy agreed easily. 

“Cool.” He clicked away from the Karen program and back to his homework. They were actually on a rabbit trail of horrified realization that international sovereignty was a bag of cats and the Accords would have been a nightmare. 

They were all busy with their various projects when Darcy spoke up again. “While I’ve got you here, we need to talk about our plans.” 

“I thought you said we were doing good?” Peter looked away from another article by a political scientist professor about the nightmare the Accords nearly caused. “I mean Tony’s not trying to support a police state. Steve’s back to chasing down Hydra leads, Barnes is in custody and awaiting trial, laws have been passed you wanted, Ross is in jail, the ATCU is in shambles, SHIELD’s getting positive press like...what else is there?” 

Daisy set her laptop aside. “You want to start making bigger changes?” 

“This is why I’m the brains around here on this stuff.” Darcy pulled a redvine out from behind one ear and stuck it in her mouth. “Our enemies aren’t going to wait for us. We need to be proactive about stopping them. For instance flushing out the Maggia is a good call.” 

Peter scratched at the bandages around his calf. “Am I going to be able to help with that?” 

“Duh, you’re my partner.” Daisy chucked a throw pillow at him.

He batted it away, but felt a pleased thrill. They were partners. He hadn’t ruined it. “Well my partner isn’t keeping up with the Spidervids. You’ve done two.” 

“I’ll do more.” Daisy grumbled.

Darcy whistled. “Siblings! Focus. We need a new set of goals, and Daisy keep spying on Tony. I don’t trust him not to have a legal stupidity relapse while he’s in Malibu. I swear that man needs so much therapy.” 

“I can do that. And the Maggia investigation is going to take at least another month to rustle up enough evidence. It helps that so far it’s off books except for the warrants which no one’s noticed so far.” Daisy looked at Darcy with a slightly pleading look. “Don’t make me do more interviews.” 

“Not yet, but if you could get me some leverage on the mayor, maybe a few senators that would be useful.” Darcy let out a groan. “I’m going to have to start making inroads into society life...joy.” 

Daisy snickered. “Need some dancing lessons? I can do dancing lessons.”

Darcy gave a pointed look at the webbing festooning the room. “Maybe next time.” She grinned. “But seriously, PR people. Which is why I signed you up for something you’re not going to like.” 

“What did you sign me up for?” Daisy groaned. 

Darcy just looked smug. “Red Nose Ninja Warrior charity run. You run some obstacles like the ninja badass you are and SI donates ten thousand to a charity of your choice for every obstacle you complete.” 

“I mean I work at a ninja gym. It sounds super fun, but I’m enhanced?” Daisy protested, looking confused. She shared a look with Peter. 

He didn’t share her confusion just bouncing slightly. “That’ll be awesome! And you control vibrations, not anything that would be cheating. Well if you don’t use your vibrations.” 

“But...technically?” Daisy tilted her head slightly. 

Darcy’s chin tipped up in victory. “I’m a genius. And they already agreed. We’re being proactive people.” 

“Uh besides healing what should I be doing?” Peter asked. He wasn’t the hacker, or the publicly acknowledged Stark with a political science degree. 

Daisy grinned. “You can help Yuri listen to the bugs we planted in the Maggia offices. You’re going to have to take notes, organize audio files.” 

“I can do it!” Peter didn’t care if it was boring. It was necessary. 

Darcy beamed. “So I’ve been thinking, we need to set up multiple spots for ‘heros’. Cause all of you living in New York is a horrifyingly terrible idea. Tony and Steve alone will kill each other if left alone for longer than a week.” 

“Steve’s got an apartment in DC. And the trial for Barnes sounds like they’re going to run it there so moving them down there just makes sense.” Daisy shrugged.

Darcy gave a considering nod. “That could work. Tony needs more Malibu time, maybe he’ll chill out, get a massage. Side idea, what are your thoughts on blackmailing politicians?” 

“I was hoping you were joking about that.” Daisy sighed, but then shrugged again. “But what the heck, let’s do it. You’re going power mad anyways, might as well speed it along.” 

Peter looked between his sisters. “Wait, you’re serious? Aunt May is so going to ground us and Thanksgiving is coming up and I need my pie. Guys!? May’s pie is important! And if we’re grounded we don’t get it! Guys!?” 

////

Steve noticed that something was different about Bucky’s room as soon as he stepped into it, Sam on his heels. He stiffened looking around the room. There was….it smelled like vanilla and there were throw pillows, twinkly christmas lights? What? “Bucky..what’s going on here?” 

“Howards granddaughters and those twins decided to stop by.” Bucky was wearing a clean flannel shirt, the empty sleeve tied in a bow, his hair back and...were his fingernails pink? 

Steve just…

Sam spoke up. “They railroaded over you then?” 

“They’re something alright.” Bucky looked...less miserable. 

Steve spoke carefully. “Darcy brought people with her to check in on you?” 

“It was smart, I could have hurt her. But I couldn’t have overpowered those three. And I wouldn’t want a fair fight with that sister of hers.” Bucky turned on the coffee maker. 

Steve frowned, but huffed in amusement. “Quake? Yeah she kinda kicked my ass in the sparring ring.”

“Not like that, she’s like us. She’s pulled the trigger. If I’d been a threat to Darcy she’d have put me down without hesitating.” Bucky smiled tightly. “These new kids, they’re gonna be something.” 

Sam actually looked interested and not just constipated. “What do you mean?” 

“You’ll see.” Bucky chuckled. “You find any Hydra in Canada?” 

Steve let it drop, for now. “Yeah we found some. Not much, it was a bolt hole more than a base. But the more we stomp out the more leads.” 

“Good.”

Steve slowed as he saw Darcy coming out of Hill’s office. “Dr Lewis.” 

“Capsical.” She looked delighted as she looked up at him. “How’s it hanging?” 

He smiled despite himself, dropping his hands on his hips. “What’s this about you having a party with Bucky?”

“Dude needs some socialization that’s not all doom and gloom. Like I’d be crawling up the walls and I’m a normy not a recovering murderbot.” 

Steve laughed. “You are certainly not an average civilian. I don’t think any of you Starks are.” 

“Fair, it’s our dazzling intelligence and smoking assets.” Darcy gave a cocky grin while crossing her arms under her chest in a very...deliberate way. 

He felt his cheeks heating as he carefully kept his eyes on her face. “That’s one way of putting it. But Darcy, surprising Bucky with people he doesn’t know isn’t smart.”

“Dude needs some socialization. Don’t you know anything? It’s important to socialize your pets. Or in this case smoking hot boyfriends.” 

Steve sighed. “Darcy are you ever going to drop that? He’s my best friend. And I’m dating Sharon.” 

“Your denial is cute.” Darcy patted his bicep. “And you really should let things...fizzle out with Sharon? I like her, she’s a badass but you two together is just sad.” 

He shifted slightly awkwardly, things had been difficult with Sharon. But he wasn’t going to mention that to Darcy. “Darcy.” 

“Fine, fine I won’t meddle. Just know I’m not meddling because we need the conservatives to like Barnes for the trial.” Darcy flipped her hair. “And I’m off to go pick up the new Spidersuit.” 

Steve sighed. “Tell the kid hi for me.” 

“Totes Capsical!” Darcy waived over her shoulder while bouncing off. 

He shook his head. Starks, honestly. Steve kept walking till he reached Hill’s office. The door was already open, so he stepped inside. “Hill, do you have a minute?”

“Steve? Of course close the door if you don’t mind.” Hill was crisp as always, it was still odd to see her out of her SHIELD jumpsuit, but she made the lawyer look intimidating. 

He shut the door and took a seat in front of her desk. “Security plans for the trial?” 

“Finished, the trial is going to start in December.” Hill raised a brow. “Did Darcy mention what she is getting PR to do for the trial?” 

Steve felt a soul deep resignation. It was going to be crazy and probably leave him owing her more than he could repay. “She didn’t.” 

“They’re using the Stark stocks invested tv stations to push reruns of old Howling Commando specials, and rerunning the old Captain America cartoon.” Hill clearly saw the disbelief on his face. “They’re reminding the public of how much they love you, and by extension Bucky. It’s kind of genius.” 

He always felt uncomfortable by how people had mythologized him. The reverence people looked at him with sometimes. “She’s weaponizing nostalgia and my name to make Bucky sympathetic. That’s...do you think it will work?” 

“I think it’s helping stack the deck. And it’s terrifying how she’s taken control of SI’s lawyers and PR people.” Hill flipped through digital files. 

Steve shifted forward. “Is Tony going to keep letting us protect Barnes? The files the lawyers found…” He didn’t need to bring up the fact Tony had blown out a side of the tower, gone for a flight and then announced he was going to Malibu the morning before Spiderman got hurt. It hadn’t gone well. 

“If he chooses not to, that's his decision to make.” Hill’s expression was sharp. “I know this trial is about a lot more than just him whether you want that or not. But no, I don’t know of any plans for him to stop helping.” 

Steve flattened his hands against his knees. “That’s...that’s good.”

“Are you going to stay here or keep chasing Hydra?” Hill asked, and oh she had an opinion, one she wasn’t going to tell him. That didn’t mean he didn’t recognize her opinion. 

He straightened back up in the chair. “Do we have a new lead on Hydra?” 

“How do you feel about New Mexico?” Hill asked. 

Steve’s shoulders settled. “Lay it on me.”

////

Wanda was reading when she felt the apartment rattle ever so faintly. She smiled faintly and got up. Moving to the window she swung it open and leaned against the sill. “Hi there.” 

“What up!” Daisy grinned, her vibrations holding her aloft outside her window. “Think you could let me in? I’m not great at holding height.” 

She watched as Daisy dropped an inch and laughed softly. Stepping back she waved Daisy in. 

Daisy shot forward through the window, rolled across the floor and then popped back up to her feet. “Flight, surprisingly difficult. Who knew?” 

“I’m pretty sure everyone.” Wanda caught Daisy and pulled her in easily. Her smile didn’t drop and she felt Daisy’s own smile as they kissed softly. More a brush of lips than anything else. 

Daisy pulled back slightly, her eyes bright and crinkled in affection. “Hi.” 

“Hi.” Wanda hooked her arms around Daisy’s neck. “What are you doing here? I thought you were joining Darcy and Jane for margaritas?” 

Daisy just looked amused as she replied. “Darcy got a call and marched off. Pretty sure she’s hunting down your brother like a prized pig. So margarita night is postponed.” 

“Do I want to know why she’s hunting down my brother?” Wanda leaned back slightly, raising a brow.

Daisy’s lips quirked into a smug look. “She got an invite to some society gala thing and needs a date.” 

“Date?” Wanda stalled slightly at that. Because what?

Daisy giggled. “She apparently must have a date for social reasons and that leaves the men she knows.” 

“Which leaves Steve or Pietro.” Wanda was surprisingly relieved. 

Daisy’s smile turned smug. “Yup.” She ducked in and kissed her. Pressing against her Daisy was insistent and solid. It was burning, but so were the emotions Wanda couldn’t avoid if she wanted to. And they had the familiar consuming all encompassing flavor Daisy’s emotions held just under the surface. 

She sucked in a sharp gasp, and Wanda felt...she felt. Wanda pressed a hand to Daisy’ chest and gently pulled away. “You’re afraid?”

Daisy’s eyes were blown but she blinked rapidly before stiffening. “I…”

“I’m not going anywhere either.” Wanda felt the change in the current of Daisy’s emotions at that. She didn’t let go of Daisy. 

And Daisy exhaled and seemed to deflate, her head falling onto Wanda’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Um…” Wanda wasn’t sure what to say or do to that. But she didn’t want Daisy to leave. “Want to watch a movie?”

Daisy huffed. “Yeah, I could do a movie.” 

Wanda stuck her spoon into Daisy’s carton of ice-cream. “You do know we watch American movies in Sokovia, yes?” 

“Are you saying you’ve seen the magic that is Spy Kids before?” Daisy grinned while using the opportunity to steal some of Wanda’s ice-cream. 

“No, but I could have.” Wanda hummed happily around her spoon of stolen chocolate ice-cream. 

Daisy pressed an icey cold kiss to her cheek. “See, you just missed the classics.” 

“I don’t think this movie is a classic.” Wanda picked a fudge chunk out of Daisy’s carton. “But did you have gadgets like these in SHIELD?”

Daisy cocked her head to the side. “Some? Robot look alikes, just got shot by those. Laser ring? Haven’t seen one but plausible. Lots of secret doors though. Sunglasses with computer readouts very real, expensive and not widely used. Surprisingly I haven't seen jetpacks but that seems like something that exists.” 

“And enemies finding the secret base immediately?” Which that was ridiculous. “If it’s been a secret for that long it’s ridiculous the enemy would just show up.”

Daisy shrugged. “Pretty accurate actually. As soon as you go to ground the chances of someone tracking you to your bolt holes goes up.” 

“Really?” Wanda looked at her curiously. It was just...nice to be sitting next to each other, shoulders leaning into each other. 

Daisy hummed. “If you’re going to a bolt hole the enemy is already too close.”

“We should watch Johnny English after this.” Wanda dug into her own carton of butterscotch. 

Daisy laughed. “You’ve seen Johnny English?” 

“Again, we do watch American movies in Europe. It’s you Americans who don’t watch movies from other countries.” Wanda chided with a laugh, her eyes crinkling in amusement. 

With a huff, Daisy took a giant bite of her ice cream. “That’s fair, but ow.” 

She relaxed, letting her head come to rest on Daisy’s shoulder while looking at the screen. This, this was nice. Feeling both her own and Daisy’s contentment. 

Wanda woke slowly, she blearily rolled further into Daisy. Part of her processed at some point they must have fallen asleep. There was a blanket over her, and she knew Daisy must have pulled it over them. She could feel that Daisy had woken up, but she was drowsy, an almost dreamlike quality to her. “Do you need your cuffs?” 

“I won’t have a night terror tonight.” Daisy murmured back.

She tightened her arm around Daisy’s waist. “Good.”


	28. Just Some Darcy Things

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this one is looking like it's going to be around fifty chapters....I think.

Darcy applied a bright red lipstick. “Good?”

“Well you look hot as fuck, so def good.” Daisy blew a gum bubble that popped. 

She double checked that not so much as a single hair was out of place. But it was good, the amount of hair spray sacrificed for the perfect waves was not to be thought of. And hairspray had been used to ensure her strapless dress stayed stuck. Pouring herself into the dress had been...less difficult than expected. The magic of clothing tailored for you. “Tonight is going to be fun.” 

“Planning on politely eviscerating anyone in particular?” Daisy asked while hovering a ball above her hand with her vibrations. 

Darcy smirked. “Of course, I’ve got Hunter on a comm planning on feeding me intell with FRIDAY while I’m in there.” 

“Nice, they won’t know what hit them.” Daisy looked away from the stress ball she was floating. “I nabbed an SI security uniform.” 

Darcy snorted outright. “You’re going to give Hill an ulcer if you keep turning SI’s security to swiss cheese.” 

“She’s caught three corporate spies with the last security upgrade. It’s good for the company, it’s my contribution to the Stark legacy.” Daisy dropped the ball into her hand. 

Darcy glanced at her sister. “That makes the slacks you’re wearing make more sense.” 

“I am capable of wearing business casual.” Daisy tossed the stress ball at her. 

She caught it. “Are you coming with us? Because if you are you’re going to want to get ready fast.” 

“Nope, I’ll slip in about half an hour after you. Try not to get kidnapped before then.” Looking far too amused Daisy winked at her. 

Darcy had a secret weapon however. “Oh? Going to be spending that time in the same place as you were last night?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Daisy replied loftily, if their bedrooms in the Parker household weren’t across the hall from each other it might even have worked. But their rooms were, and Darcy was quite aware Daisy hadn’t returned home till the wee hours of the morning. 

Thus Darcy just felt smug as she looked at her sister. “Then I must have imagined the fact you weren’t in your room when I swiped one of your hair ties this morning at seven, but you were at breakfast twenty minutes later.” She caught the slightest look of worry on Daisy’s face, which victory. “So how is our favorite Witch?”

Daisy opened and then shut her mouth. “You’re a menace.” 

“I live to serve the army of darkness.” Darcy smirked before falling slightly serious. “Keeping it quiet for now though?” 

She nodded slightly, shoving her hands under her to keep from fidgeting. “It’s just…..new.” 

“I live to serve, not a soul shall learn about it from me. Though pro-tip, your bedroom does have a lock on it.” Darcy smoothed out the lines of her dress, it was a sleek asymmetrical tightly fitted dress, the fabric a silver meant to invoke the look of mercury. It was probably the most expensive piece of clothing she now owned, thanks to Pepper. 

Daisy slid to her feet with a grin. “Thanks for the tip. Now, you have some high society assholes to terrorize.”

“I do, let’s hope they play nice.” Darcy didn’t need to mention that being Tony’s surprise bastard wasn’t going to endear her. Her financial and political value would, but they weren’t going to want her there. It was going to be delightful. 

Darcy slid into the limo and looked at Pietro who was already waiting. “You clean up nice.” 

“Glad you think so.” He lazed artfully along the leather seats, full formal evening suit complete with bowtie. “You look ravishing.” 

“I know.” Darcy tipped her chin up, she looked fucking fantastic. “Ready to be judged?” 

Pietro frowned slightly. “What do you mean?” 

“So pretty…” She patted his shoulder. “Just remember we’re about to go swimming in a shark tank.” 

“But we are the bigger sharks yes?” He turned smug again. 

She smirked right back. “We’re the biggest sharks. Oh and Daisy is faking being part of SI’s security presence.” 

“Are we expecting to be shot at?” 

Darcy arched an eyebrow. “No, but I’m a Stark and you’re an enhanced Avenger. So chances are higher than average.” 

“I’ll be sure to save you.” Pietro grinned. “You might even fall into my arms.” 

She laughed at that. “That’s a tough sell. And ‘fast’ isn’t exactly what a girl wants Speedy.” 

“I’m wounded.” But Pietro was just amused, the warm knowledge of each other there. 

Darcy relaxed easily into her seat. “If we weren’t about to use champaign as a shield against rich assholes I’d say we should check out the bar in here. Thoughts on New York traffic.” 

His face twisted in disgust, which just caused her to let her head fall back and just laugh.

Pietro opened the door and slid out of the limo, holding the door open he held out his hand with a cocky grin. She accepted his hand and stepped out of the car. Cameras flashed, and she was slightly surprised they’d recognized her that fast. Damn.

“This is insane.” Pietro said lowly as he escorted her past the reporters and towards the gala. 

She smiled while speaking lowly. “This is a fundraiser for the new cardio vascular ward at the hospital. So there will be some doctors and administrators about. They’ll probably be the nicest people here.” 

“Are you donating?” Pietro asked as they entered the large foyer of the hospital that had been transformed for the night. 

Darcy squeezed his arm slightly when she felt him gaping. “Of course, or SI is donating and I’m here to discuss the parameters of that donation with the hospital.”

“Discuss?” Pietro asked as they both grabbed flutes of champagne. 

She made eye contact with a man in a suit who was making his way straight for them. “You’ll see.” 

“Ms Stark!” The man smiled, holding out his hand. “We’re so glad you were able to make it.” 

Darcy didn’t need Hunter’s voice in her earpiece telling her who this particular individual was. “Dr Constance, your work on heart valves proceeds you.” 

He looked genuinely surprised. “I wasn’t aware SI had an interest in heart valves?” 

“We’re diversifying since we acquired Dr Cho. Also using biological technology to regulate some of the new fluids we’re working on is surprisingly effective.” Darcy took a sip from her new flute of champagne. 

Dr Constance’s eyes sparked in interest. “Really?” 

“Well what is the body but a highly effective machine?” Darcy leaned ever so slightly into Pietro. 

The man actually beamed. “Exactly! Have you seen the latest numbers?” 

“I have, we’ll have to arrange for you to speak with our medical department we’re building up right now. In the meantime you should let Mrs Polinski know I’d appreciate a chance to speak with her.” Darcy spotted someone she actually wanted to talk to, and who wouldn’t ignore Pietro over Constance’s shoulder.

Constance straightened. “Of course, if you have time later I’d be happy to talk more Ms Stark.” He then bustled to the next people entering. 

Pietro spoke up. “Why did you let him call you Ms Stark?” 

“There is a time to remind people my name should be Dr Lewis, and a doctor trying to fund his research isn’t who to make that point to.” Darcy gave a pointed look towards the CEO she’d spotted earlier. “Over there.” 

Pietro obligingly led them towards the CEO currently trying to eat as many of the salmon crackers as possible before someone tried to speak to him. “Do you need me by your side for all of this?” 

“Not at all, I have a feeling I’ll be leaving you with this gentleman.” Darcy barely kept from laughing as CEO Martin Li’s eyes widened as he realized he’d been spotted. She smiled. “Mr Li, forget to eat before we got here?”

He swallowed, wiping crumbs from his hands before holding out his hand. “Business call went long before this. And you must be Dr Lewis?” 

“In the flesh, this Pietro Maximoff. Pietro this is Mr Li, he’s one of the largest names in shipping here in New York.” Darcy introduced. 

Li looked at her consideringly. “Well I see my reputation precedes me. An Avenger and a Stark, I’m not sure that’s a good thing.” He brushed the last of the crumbs off of himself while chuckling self deprecating. 

Darcy lightly laughed. “SI has been considering investing in your FEAST program. It’s the type of outreach that is actively helping our community.” 

“You run FEAST?” Pietro blinked in surprise, his face turning far more interested. 

Li nodded. “Yes it’s a program that is very important, both to me and the community. Are you serious about investing? ‘

“Of course, expansion of your program could do nothing but beneficial.” Darcy looked around the room. “So what’s the sitch here?” 

Li laughed. “Well, they won’t start the speeches for a while yet. Hold onto your pocket book or Mrs Polinski will have put a significant dent in your bank accounts. Woman’s a fundraising shark.” 

“Her reputation certainly precedes her. I was warned repeatedly by our charity department.” 

Darcy resisted rolling her eyes as she sipped her champaign. She did make eye contact with Steve from across the hall though. Returning her attention to the conversation she’d been pulled into she regretted not rolling her eyes, almost. “Yes it certainly has been a change finding out who my father is. I’m sorry I’m unclear was your father Richard or Paul? The time between divorce and remarriage is just so tight there you know?” 

“She certainly has you there.” A smarmy man joined in. And that was unmistakably the face of one Justin Hammer. 

Darcy arched a brow. “Mr Hammer.” She accepted his outstretched hand. 

“And aren’t you a ravishing sight Ms Stark.” His eyes very distinctly lingered on her breasts. “You might just be lucky enough to be the next Mrs Hammer.” 

The man clearly thought he was charming, the socialites she’d been speaking with agreed with him apparently based on the giggles. Or else thought it was funny, expecting her to fumble at that. Probably a mix of the two. 

Darcy gave a pointed up and down of the man. “I see prison didn’t suit your disposition. Your company’s stock fell by two thirds after your arrest, titillating lifestyle change I’m sure.” 

“Well don’t you have a sharp tongue.” He laughed, leaning back. 

Darcy’s smile showed just a touch of teeth. “So I’ve been told, but then it might just be the quick mind of youth. You’re the same age as my father after all. It must make dating younger people difficult, what with the generation gap.” 

There was less laughter now. Darcy set her empty flute of champagne aside. “It’s Dr Lewis by the way, not Ms Stark. Now if you don’t mind, I have no interest in pretending you’re not attempting to use me against Tony. So since I’d rather not waste my time, excuse me.” 

Darcy ignored the sounds of bitten back amusement and shock as she separated herself from the dregs. Some enemies weren’t worth sweet talking. And a creepy failed supervillain was not worth playing nice with. She finally spotted Mrs Polinski.

“Stark, or is it Lewis?” Polinski beamed, she looked like she’d spotted steak not a person.

“Lewis.” Darcy paused as she spotted Tony entering the gala. That was not good, he was supposed to be in Malibu, and she could see the focused mania from here. She returned her attention to Mrs Polinski. “Actually if you don’t mind I’d love to speak with you about what SI can do for this hospital, perhaps over coffee tomorrow?” 

“Of course, I’d be delighted to. Shall I have my assistant call your offices?” The woman’s eyes glinted at the opportunity. 

She plastered on a smile in alarm as she realized Tony was making a beeline for Steve. That was such a bad idea. “That sounds great, if you don’t mind.” Darcy brushed past the woman, she’d be forgiven after handing over the size of check SI was going to be writing to the hospital. Instead she moved to cut off the PR disaster in the making. 

Darcy got there just as Tony bit out a furious “Steve.” 

She grabbed both of their arms. “Boys, if we’re going to be talking Avenger business, perhaps somewhere a bit more private?” Her smile was tight, it was all teeth. 

Steve twitched as he saw her expression. Tony on the other hand looked at her, his jaw ticking to one side before giving a sharp nod. 

“I’m sure there’s a powder room we can commadier.” Darcy whisked them out of the hospital foyer and into some poor administrative office. She’d leave a check or something. There was a blur and Pietro was there, holding the door open. 

Darcy cast her eyes back and caught Daisy’s. Daisy was in a simple security suit and easily fell into the position of guarding the door. As the door closed Darcy whirled on the two men. “What the fuck?!” 

“I should be the one saying that.” Tony turned on her, and he was furious. “You went into Barnes’s cell! Risked your life for what?! Waited till I was gone to do it.” He spun on Steve. “And how dare you ask that of her! You bring your murderbot into my tower, and then have the audacity to ask MY daughter to be in a locked room with it!” 

Steve bristled. “Bucky is a person. And I didn’t ask anything she didn’t volunteer to do.” 

“He killed my parents! I’m paying for his lawyers, letting him stay in my tower! And you still want more from me!?” Tony stepped into Steve’s face. “Your murderbot is a monster! I should kick the two of you out.” 

Darcy pressed hand to Tony and shoved him back. “Both of you shut up.” Glaring she turned on Tony. “The last I checked I was a fucking adult Tony. So yes I volunteered to go into the hulk room with Barnes. And you know what? I’m aware that he’s a brainwashed Hydra assassin. So I brought Daisy, Wanda and Pietro with me. I’m not an idiot.” 

“He killed my parents, your grandparents!” Tony snarled. “I don’t care who you brought with you it was stupid and irrisponcible.” 

“Hey now.” Steve started. 

Darcy whistled. “Shut up.” She breathed in deeply. “Steve, just shut up.” Turning on Tony again she didn’t back down an inch. “Besides the man was tortured and brainwashed for years. He probably liked Howard more than you did. Of course Hydra would use their weapon like that. They’d get a kick out of making friends kill friends.” 

“I don’t care, he killed them.” Tony snapped. 

She was barely aware of it as she raised a hand and slapped Tony across the face. The room was dead silent. Darcy straightened. “Clint was brainwashed, I don’t see you blaming him for that? For fucks sake do you think Daisy is responcible for what she did while possessed by whatever the fuck was in her head? I am trying to make sure the whole damn planet doesn’t politically implode and you can’t get your head out of your ass long enough to think before you speak.”

Darcy wasn’t done. She didn’t care that she could see the anger in Tony’s face. “You were fine with helping Barnes till we found those files that showed he’d killed Howard and Maria. So it was fine when it was other innocent people he was used as a weapon against. You were fine with that. But not if the innocent people were people you cared about. And I was smart about it, I was safe, you think a one armed and unarmed Barnes is a match for Wanda or Daisy let alone both of them?” 

“Are you done?” Tony’s voice was tight. 

She stared at him silently for a long minute. “No, but you were done listening to me a while ago.”

Tony twisted slightly. And then he turned on his heel and walked out. 

The room was utterly silent. 

“Thank you for standing up for Bucky.” Steve finally said. 

Darcy’s eyes sharpened as she looked at him. “Go socialize Steve, and maybe spend two fucks to think about treating Tony like a friend. Because I see a lot of using him for his resources from you, and I don’t see you bothering with much else.” 

His mouth snapped shut. He gave her a sharp nod and then left. 

“That was certainly something.” Pietro blurred to her side. 

Darcy looked at him. “Would you be good to run to the tower?” 

“It’s not far, I could do it without hurting myself.” Pietro was looking at her cautiously like she might turn her ire on him as well. 

She nodded. Stepping forward she grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him closer and down till they were at eye level. Darcy knew her eyes had to be dilated. “I am either going to go get very drunk or this. Yes or no Speedy.” 

“By this you mean sex?” Pietro’s breath had hitched slightly. 

Darcy huffed. “Obviously, no strings attached. We’re still whatever we are, friends I think afterwards. But I’d like to fuck this out of my system.” 

“Your place or mine?” Pietro grinned. 

Darcy woke, she was pleasantly sore and just...fuck. She let her arm fall over her eyes and groaned. “Fuck.” 

“That is what we did krasyvva divchyna.” Pietro said from the doorway. 

She sat up and noticed he was leaning against the doorframe. He was also clearly freshly showered and dressed. “You're a morning person. Of course you’re a morning person.” Darcy climbed out of bed and rummaged through her clothing drawer for something comfortable. 

“I started the coffee, I hope that is ok?” Pietro said, his eyes were definitely giving her an appreciative once over while she pulled on an old t-shirt. 

Darcy actually hummed at that. “Good, coffee’s important.” She paused before walking past him into the kitchenette of her tower apartment. “We’re good?” 

“I think so? We just continue as we were?” He checked. 

She actually smiled at that. At least one thing hadn’t been a minor disaster. “Good. Though if you ever want to do this again I wouldn’t mind.” 

“I certainly wouldn’t complain.” Pietro chuckled while zipping into the kitchenette where he’d clearly been making breakfast. 

Darcy ran a hand through her hair. She looked up at one corner of the room. “FRIDAY, where’s Tony?”

Darcy was in a soft sweatshirt, yoga pants, glasses perched on her nose and hair back in a sloppy ponytail when she made her way into Tony’s private workshop. She didn’t interrupt him, just hopped onto the work bench and waited. Her legs kicked loosely. 

“Here to yell at me some more?” Tony finally asked, not looking away from the circuit board he was soldering. 

She took in his hunched back, the fact he wouldn’t even look at her. “Not particularly. I’m sure you could inspider some yelling if that’s what you want.”

“Then I’m surprised you’re not playing ring around the rosie with the murderbot who killed your grandparents.” Tony definitely twitched there. 

Darcy just sighed, this was exhausting. “You don’t get it do you?” 

“Get what? That you don’t care what he’s done? But perfect Steve is forgiven everything.” 

“He’s not you know.” She shook her head. “Steve’s your friend and I think you’ve both forgotten that. But that’s for you two assholes to fix between yourselves. But you don’t get what your actions do.” 

Tony’s jaw twitched, he spun in his chair to face her. “That’s why I have been trying to ensure there’s someone to keep us in check. But you and everyone else slowed that down.” 

“Daisy would be in a prison for enhanced without trial wearing a shock collar to keep her from using her powers if you’d gotten what you wanted. And for that matter blaming Barnes for what he did while under mind control? You think that doesn’t bother Daisy, your daughter who left SHIELD because she was mind controlled?” Darcy spread her hands. “You think the laws you wanted would have spared Peter just because he’s a kid? People you don’t intend to get hurt get hurt when you do things without thinking Tony.” 

“So that’s what you think of me?” He asked tightly. 

She kind of wanted to shake him. “I think you’re so far removed from the consequences of your actions you don’t even know how to fucking comprehend them. You don’t have to like Barnes, hell even look at him. But if you want the legal system to set a precedent of successfully trying enhanced, then you need this trial to go forward.”

“So it’s all that simple to you? That’s cold. Steve know you see his bestie as a tool?” But Tony just sounded hurt under the bravado. 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “If the man listened to anything I’ve said he does. So really who knows. But I’ve met Barnes, I like him. Not going to spend time alone with him anytime soon. But none of this is about what I think of him. It’s about you learning to take a goddamn second, breathe, and then talk to someone.” 

“He killed my mom.” Tony’s voice shook ever so little. “I can’t lose any of you kids too.”

Darcy hopped off the work bench. It took three strides to reach him and pull him into a hug, burying her face into his shoulder. “I am so sorry.” And he clung back to her.


	29. Spies and Pair Bonded Cats

Natasha was stretching when she heard the faint whoosh of the automated door into the gym. Without turning she could hear the footsteps, steady and even, light even but heavier shoes. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted her guest. Well, it would seem Quake was the Stark sibling chosen to approach her. It was about time. Admittedly she wasn’t a trashcan fire of disaster like Steve or Tony. 

She didn’t change her movements, just slowly finishing her stretches. And Daisy politely waited, a specifically non-threatening distance. Well non-threatening if Natasha wasn’t aware that the other woman was enhanced. Still it was polite and set a probable tone to the conversation she wanted to have. 

Straightening, Natasha turned to face Daisy. She raised a brow giving a pointed look at the khaki slacks, green polo, and jeans jacket the woman was wearing. Someone had been doing intel gathering as an environmental petition pusher. “Planning on just standing there or planning on joining me on the mats?” 

“You’d want to spar with me? I’ve only been training for four years now.” Daisy shrugged, a slight embarrassed lilt to her as she brushed her hair out of her face. 

Natasha stepped to the lockers and pulled out her spare workout clothing and tossed it at the former agent. “Melinda May trained you.” 

“Fair enough.” Daisy chuckled and then started to change. She didn’t bother with moving to the changing room, her actions easy and unconcerned. 

It was interesting what that said about her. Natasha could easily piece things together; used to close quarters where privacy is limited, minor dissociation or surprisingly grounded in her body, likely a mix of the two. Moving away she pulled out the tape and began to tape her knuckles methodically. Sparring with the woman would be interesting. More interesting than the four way sparring match between the Cap, Spiderman and the two of them. 

Group sparring with power use changed how people fought. It firmly established just how protective Daisy was of the Spiderkid. In fact she was protective to a self destructive degree that some might find concerning. Natasha found it familiar, and reassuring in what it said about the woman’s intentions. It had also showed that Daisy was not just familiar with fighting in coordination with another person, that she trusted the Spider. But the way she kept her stance strong regardless of whether the kid was there or not said trust issues. 

Natasha tossed the tape to Daisy while pulling on the sparring gloves. Protective gear for this spar she thought. She found she was looking forward to what Agent May’s former rookie showed of herself on the mats. It would be interesting without Daisy having to adjust her stances to be more grounded so she could brace herself. 

Natasha stepped into the middle of the mats. “Ready?” 

“For my inevitable defeat.” Daisy’s lips twitched, but she fell into a well practiced stance. She bounced slightly and then lashed out sharply with a fist. 

Natasha used one hand to deflect, while physically leaning back ever so slightly. She then twisted out of the way of the brutal follow up kick. As she moved to put space, Daisy followed. 

Where she twisted and flowed around her opponent, Daisy lunged and snapped. Natasha was instinctively pulling Daisy into showing her abilities. And it was interesting to further put together the picture it formed. Sniper training, her fighting was similar to Clint’s. Quick, brutal and designed for taking down one to two opponents that might have reached your perch. 

She bent backwards, letting a kick pass harmlessly over where her head had just been. Natasha’s hands hit the ground, bracing herself for a split second before she kicked out with both feet hitting Daisy in the abdomen. She flipped herself back to her feet. 

Daisy recovered with the speed that only came with regularly sparring with individuals far more talented than herself. And Daisy didn’t let up. She was back on the attack as soon as she had her feet back under her. 

Natasha swept the woman’s feet, while striking at her face. She lowered her hands and dropped her stance. Sniper trained, then taught to be a tank first through the door post power manifestation almost certainly. Natasha realized she was breathing heavily and her forearms were going to be badly bruised from this sparring match. Another year of experience and Daisy would be an even match for Barton and agents like Morse. 

There was natural talent there, dedication, and a clearly gifted SO. Agent May had clearly done far more than just teach what she knew. The woman had clearly laser focused on combat training. Smart, and implied the other field agent skills had already been there. Although… “Who taught you boxing?” 

Daisy panted, she used her powers to push herself easily back up to her feet. “My first SO. I don’t think he knew how to train a girl.” Her head tilted to the side, a sneer to her face. “Or he was just Hydra scum. Same difference really.” 

“You should join training here more often.” Natasha gave a nod of approval, her own breath surprisingly heavy. “But Melinda trained you well, and you have certainly put in the effort.” 

Daisy smiled, pleased expression on her face. “That means a lot from you.” She touched the back of her neck. “I clearly still have a long way to go.” 

“Are you going to say why you came to see me?” Natasha raised a brow, it was interesting how easily the woman had let her goal be delayed. 

She rocked back on her heels. “I was going to ask if you wanted to get coffee and talk about the uh...mess? Drama trashcan? Disaster? That is Tony and Steve banging around.” 

“Darcy sent you?” Natasha was amused, it was kind of surprising that the Stark kids clearly saw her as a possible ally instead of a problem. It was refreshingly unusual. 

Daisy grinned. “Of course, and I volunteered.” 

“I could drink some coffee.” Natasha agreed, she knew what they wanted from her. But she was getting a much better measure of one of the most dangerous enhanced individuals in the country. The quiet confidence in her abilities was interesting. Daisy certainly had been in enough fights to have her own measure. A good quality in an agent. 

Daisy beamed stepping off the maps. “I don’t know about you but I’m a sucker for pumpkin spice. Forget being basic, it’s delicious.” 

Natasha sipped her caramel latte, she appreciated Daisy had wordlessly offered her the seat with the best view of the small coffee shop. “How effective was the environmental petition pusher work for you?” 

“I think it’s the single most immediately invisible appearing cover I’ve ever used.” Daisy’s eyes crinkled in amusement. “People actively try not to notice you.”

She hadn’t used that cover herself, it wasn’t one suited for long term infiltration. But then Daisy was clearly not trained for long term infiltration. Not that Daisy wasn’t suited for it. She far too easily reflected the people around her. A chameleon, it said a lot about what her time in foster care had been like. It was the behavior of one actively trying to adjust to a new home so many times the behavior became personality. 

Natasha noted no one was listening in to their conversation. “Interesting choice to investigate the mafia.” 

“It’s going well, one judge, and three cops now are aware of the investigation.” Daisy looked smug at that. “Daredevil was surprisingly enthusiastic about targeting the mafia for a while.” 

She was fairly impressed, a small and effective investigation while using a third party to distract everyone. It was classic SHIELD small ops strategy being used to it’s most advantageous. And neatly sidestepped the reason for doing it. Fair enough. “Will your brother be assisting you?” 

“Dr Cho says he can get back to the swinging soon.” Daisy’s shoulders relaxed as she said that. She took a drink of her coffee. 

Natasha leaned back in her seat. “So what did you want to talk about?” 

“We don’t know how to help with Tony and Steve. And honestly with Pepper in Malibu we don’t know how to help the Avengers. I mean the kid and I aren’t part of you guys. And the twins haven’t exactly been with you long.” Daisy actually looked slightly comfortable.

She considered the former agent. “They need time.” 

“Why aren’t you the leader of the Avengers?” Daisy asked, and she was dead serious. 

Natasha was...that wasn’t expected in any way. “Excuse me?” 

“I mean having gotten to know Tony the man has the long term planning and emotional intelligence of a four year old. And I don’t know Steve well but he’s clearly incapable of dealing with more than one priority at a time.” Daisy’s eyes were clear and certain. 

She considered that it was...it wasn’t a baseless question surprisingly. “I’m not a leader, it’s not a skill I was ever expected to have, so I don’t have it. But Steve is leaving to follow up several leads we have on Hydra. It should ease tensions.” Natasha wondered. “Would you warn me before you attempt to interfere with the team?” 

“Well Peter and I were planning on getting Bucky a cat from the shelter this afternoon.” Daisy turned her latte cup in her hands. “I was only left in solitary for a week and I was going stir crazy.” 

Well that was interesting, Daisy clearly didn’t handle isolation well. Natasha could see the benefits of their plan. Whether it helped Barnes or not it would help ease Steve’s worries about leaving Barnes for longer than a few days at a time. “That would be beneficial. Text me with your other ideas.” 

“Are you asking if I’ve hacked into Tony’s phone and thus have your number?” Daisy looked amused. 

Natasha raised a brow at her. “I review the security reports. I would expect Wanda to give it to you.” 

Daisy’s face actually reddened slightly, her eyes flicked down. She cleared her throat. “I’ll text.” 

“I also speak for the team when I say your abilities would be useful if we have another situation like Ultron or the Chitauri.” Natasha took a drink of her coffee, it was good to have reached the correct conclusion. 

“I’d be...of course. Tony and FRIDAY have my number and yeah.” Daisy blinked clearly, taken by surprise. 

Natasha wondered at that. It was odd to see a woman who knew exactly what she was capable of. Who was quietly confident in her skills but who doubted her value in the eyes of others. A paradox in a way. It was a habit to note it as a weak point. No wonder all it’d taken for her one woman Watchdog murder quest to come to a screetching halt was a single teenager needing her. Of course Daisy would have slowed for her sister, but it was Peter’s need that had done it. 

All in all Natasha could see who this person was. And it was the type you could trust so long as you didn’t pose a threat to the people she saw as ‘her’s’. There likely wasn’t a line she wouldn’t cross for her loved ones. Natasha sympathised with that. But most importantly, an ally that could be reasonably trusted. 

She took a long drink of her coffee. “I’ll do what I can to keep Steve focused on Hydra and AIM. Do you think you and your siblings can convince Tony to talk to someone?” Which wasn’t that odd, it was a realistic chance they might be able to do it? 

Daisy nodded. “We’re going to try.” 

“Good, you really should come by the tower to work with the team occasionally.” Natasha’s lips curled up. “And Wanda likes flowers by the way.” 

////

Peter pouted at Tony. “But you gotta convince Darcy that hoverboards are cool! If you don’t she’ll never make one.” 

“Kid they’re impractical.” Tony replied from where he was pulling on a new suit. 

He narrowed his eyes. “Your lawyers already said no didn’t they?” 

“Risk of litigation.” Tony admitted while straightening his jacket. He turned. “So, how do I look?” 

Peter gave a proper once over the suit. “Very professional, I think Pepper would approve.” 

“Excellent.” He clapped his hands. “How are the dendrotoxin webs going?” 

He bounced in excitement. “Really well, we’ve figured out the right ratio, the problem is the dendrotoxin dissipates when exposed to oxygen. So Dr Simmons and I have been talking about stabilizing and bonding agents that could help.” He beamed. “And Dr Simmons has been letting me read some of her papers that are still classified! Did you know the work that’s been done on gravitonium? It could theoretically be used to enable long term space flight!” 

“Your sister got the SHIELD Director to give you low level access privileges didn’t she?” Tony patted him on the shoulder. “Creative bending of the rules. I approve.” 

Peter just grinned. “Yup! I’ve got level two clearance for intel from the bio-chem lab.” 

“That mean you’re interested in the pseudo science they do at Oscorp?” Tony looked actually pained to say the word ‘Oscorp’. 

He let his legs kick under him, as they hung off the edge of the desk he was perched on. “I’m going to work for SI when I graduate from college. But the virology labs at Oscorp especially are cutting edge. And their work on steroids is revolutionary!” 

“Bah.” Tony waved off in disgust. “That’s just fancy talk for trying to make a super soldier serum the slow way.” 

Considering that his head cocked to one side. “Maybe? But the application in modern medicine has paid off. ‘Sides just cause it could be the chemical building blocks of a super soldier serum doesn’t mean it is.” Peter winced at the look on Tony’s face, and yeah that sounded pretty bad. “It’s totally a secret super soldier program isn’t it?” 

Tony actually clapped him on the back. “Chin up, they’re clearly so incompetent at it we won’t have to deal with them for a few years yet.” 

Peter peeked at his dad from under his fringe. “So uh...totally irrelevant. But there's this girl…” 

“I mean wrap it, don’t share photos, and have fun.” Tony pulled out a Starkpad and started pulling up what was likely his notes for the meeting he had. 

He cringed, his whole face flushing bright red. “What?! No it’s...I just want to ask her out to like coffee?” 

“Then I don’t know kid, I think giant two story tall stuffed bears are appropriate romantic gestures so doing the opposite of what I do is probably a good call.” Tony’s eyes lit up. “Ask Daisy, she definitely swings for girls so she’d know what to do.” 

Peter nodded, that had probably been what he should have done from the beginning. But she’d seen how awkward he was over the whole Liz’s dad being a super villain thing. “Yeah, that’s probably what I should do.” 

“See, you’ll do great.” Tony turned and winked at him. “Now I’ve got a board to go charm for Pepper. Good luck with the girl stuff. I’m sure you’ll do great. You’ve got my charm afterall.” 

He shook his head...Tony was kind of a mess but he liked him. Peter hopped off the desk. “I should probably go see if Dr Cho is ready to take a look at me yet.” 

“Kid, it’s good to hear you’re healing so fast.” Tony was oddly serious, and then it was gone. He practically whistled as he sauntered out of his office. 

Peter sighed. Now to find out his fate, would he get to try out the new suit this week or next week? He didn’t put it past his sisters to have bribed the doc to extend it out a bit. He felt fine, really. 

Peter was gleeful as he dropped down where Daisy was waiting for him. “I got a clean bill of health!” He proudly brandished the paperwork Dr Cho had given him. 

Daisy reached out ruffling his hair, and then used her hold on him to haul him into a hug. “Good, you have to explain why that means you get to swing around to Aunt May.” 

“Please? But she’d listen to you.” He made sure his eyes were as sad as possible. 

His sister just huffed. “Nope, and she still glares when anyone reminds her of the shattered bones. I just got shot, I’m pretty sure she trusts you, teenage vigilante, more than me on health.” 

“Fair.” He accepted that, it was a good point. Aunt May had developed a twitch anytime Daisy brushed off injuries when she talked about SHIELD. “But you’re ok with me getting back into it?”

Daisy gave him a bland look. “If I never have to post another Spidervid it will be too soon.” 

“Your series on self defence was really good. And your numbers are great.” Peter kept to himself he was pretty sure Darcy was contemplating making a Quake channel. He wasn’t going to be the one to burst Daisy’s bubble. 

She looked at him suspiciously. “Thanks?” 

“I mean if you still have the video from today, you could have Pietro be a stand in for the attacker?” He really wanted to see Daisy whack someone around. It’d been so long, what with the whole healing from werewolf thing. 

Daisy hooked an arm around his neck and started pulling him down the street. “Pietro huh? This has nothing to do with him eating the last of the Fruit by the Foot?” 

“No comment.” He pretended his ears weren’t turning red. 

She just laughed. “I’ll ask him. Revenge for my baby bro is part of the job description I think.” 

With a pleased grin Peter hummed. “So what type of cat do you think we should get Barnes? I was thinking like a tiny kitten that needs a lot of care so he can like bond with it and take care of it. Cause big cats don’t really need a lot of...they’re very independent.” 

“Sounds good to me. You all are the ones who came up with the plot.” Daisy smiled, she was less closed off when it was just them sometimes. It was nice. “So how was talking with Tony?” 

His face scrunched slightly as he considered how to put it. “Good? I like afternoons with him. But I think it’d be good for him if he does the rich people therapy and wellness retreat Darcy’s been leaving information on. He seems...sad.” 

“To him we’re all trying to protect the person who killed his Aunt May.” Daisy’s arm tightened before she finally released him. “That and the man is like if I had an extra forty years of trauma.” 

Peter snorted, it was a fair enough estimate. But he was fairly sure Daisy would never turn out like Tony. Very different coping methods. “I asked for advice on a girl.” His nose wrinkled. “He said to ‘wrap it and have fun’.” 

Daisy laughed outright. “You should probably not mention that to Aunt May unless you want him to get in trouble. Or Pepper for that matter.” 

“It’d be funny though.” He stuffed his hands into his pockets. “But uh...how do you ask a girl to get coffee with you?” 

Daisy looked just… “I mean..I think you just ask? But of the four relationships I’ve been in I don’t really think any of them count as typical?” 

“Four?” Peter lit up, spinning around so he was walking backwards facing her. Glee coursed through him as he saw the hint of embarrassment on his sister’s face. “You’re dating someone?! You are!” 

She rolled her eyes, but she had the smallest of pleased smiles on her face. “Fine, yes. But it’s new and I have no idea what I’m doing so just...don’t tell anyone yet?” 

“Sure? But you’re happy right?” He was Spiderman. If he needed to punch someone he’d do it. 

Daisy cuffed him lightly. “Yes I’m happy. Just apparently clueless about what to do in a relationship that isn’t being crammed into the brief hours between missions.” 

“Huh...so...we both should ask Darcy for help?” Peter actually grinned at the slight horror on Daisy’s face. It was always nice when they could be like this, when she seemed lighter. 

With a pained sigh, Daisy rolled her eyes. “I hate that that is probably a good idea. I used to be good at this stuff.” 

Peter just bounced as he spotted the animal shelter. They were going to find the best kitten in the place.

Peter stared into the cage. They were perfect. “Daisy, these ones.” 

“Did you just say ‘ones’?” Daisy stepped over to him, she had a grey kitten cradled in her hands. There was a long pause. “I thought you wanted a kitten?” 

Peter stared at the two cats. “Look at their card. They’re pair bonded and have to stay together.” 

“Primrose and Bob.” Daisy’s voice was oddly dry. “Primrose looks like she’s been part of an underground feline fight club and smoked a carton a day.” 

“They’re perfect.” He breathed. “And Bob looks super cuddly.” 

Daisy was staring at the cage. “If Primrose didn’t maul you before you could touch him.” She titled her head. “I suppose it’s a bit fitting. You’re sure?” 

“I’m sure. They are meant for Barnes. Look at their little whiskered faces. We have to save them.” He turned to look at Daisy. 

She mostly looked amused, as she stood there with an easy confidence. “Well, I’ll go find the lady and tell her to get us a cat box. You can get them into the thing.” 

He felt his spider senses tingle in alarm at the very concept of reaching into the cage. But that would be ridiculous, obviously. “We’re getting cat stuff after right?” 

“Yup, Hunter’s got the car waiting for us out front.” Daisy raised a brow. “You’re sure? Really sure?”

Peter nodded. “I’m sure. They’re Purrfect.”


	30. Daisy, Emotionally Competent Adult?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup! My roommate is super into football....I am starting to learn about it via osmosis. I just had a moment when he said a team name and I just auto-completed with 'whom we hate'. Also I think I know about 60% of the rules now. Which this is weird...I mean I dated the varsity running back in high school and I picked up nothing. God the dark days when I was trying to be straight....

Daisy wondered if she should be concerned at how easy it was to break into the tower? Naw, considering her training and inside knowledge it wasn’t a viable threat. She might mention a few things to Hill again. Probably. Once through the twentieth floor window she neatly closed it. Fixing her hair, she made her way to the elevator. FRIDAY wouldn’t tell on her. 

Actually. “FRIDAY, are the Maximoff twins up yet?” She shifted the bag of groceries she’d picked up before heading over. They were slightly perilously perched on top of the box she and Peter had put together the night before.

-”The Maximoff twins are still asleep Ms. Quake. It is four am. Sir is the only non night staff currently awake.”-

She smiled. “Thanks FRIDAY, can you unlock the Maximoff’s door for me when I reach it?”

-”Of course Ms. Quake. You as well as your family have access to that apartment.”-

Daisy gave a pleased hum at that. She winked at a camera as she slid into the twins’s apartment. It was quiet, the curtains pulled over the massive floor to ceiling windows every outward facing room in the building was blessed/cursed with. Setting her load down on the counter she considered her method of attack. Flowers first? Vases. You were supposed to put flowers in vases. 

She rooted through the cupboards and eventually just threw her hands up in frustration and grabbed a large travel mug. Once filled she put the small bouquet of flowers in it. Daisy allowed herself a pleased nod. The things looked kind of like tiny sunflowers, but the lady at the cart had informed her they were something called Black Eyed Susans...she honestly figured the bright yellowish orange flowers were pretty and the best she was going to manage for a gesture. She wasn’t floundering enough to ask Darcy for help. Peter with his crush might be, but she was not. 

“Right.” Daisy turned and started pulling out ingredients and was grateful she knew where the twins kept their various bowls and mixing spoons. She could manage pancakes and eggs. Probably. Fingers crossed.

Daisy proudly set a truly massive stack of pancakes on the tiny table. It was a tower more than a stack. And she’d only ruined three eggs during the process. She was counting it as a resounding success. 

There was a bluish blur. Pietro screeched to a halt staring at her in surprise. He looked at the food. He looked at her. “Uh...morning?” 

“Morning Pietro. And yes help yourself.” Daisy grinned at him, it was always fun to surprise people. 

He looked at the food. “Is it safe?” 

“I’m not that bad.” Daisy shoved him a step back with some gentle vibrations and huffed. 

Pietro shrugged, there was a blur and then he was standing there, plate loaded up with food and glass of orange juice. He was chewing a bite. “Not bad.” He grinned, it was stupidly smug and amused. “I’m gonna go hide in my room. Avoid whatever...thing this is you are doing.” He winked. 

She rolled her eyes, bemused smile on her face as she watched him blur out of the room. Food included. “Good to see you too.” 

Daisy leaned against the counter. She waited, she didn’t have to wait long.

“Daisy?” Wanda asked while shuffling in. She seemed to take in everything and then laughed. “I wasn’t expecting you, thank you.” 

She offered out a plate. “Well I may not really know how this normal dating thing goes. But I’m pretty sure gestures that don’t involve violence are included.” Daisy grinned as Wanda accepted the plate. 

“It is nice to get to see you without paintballs being involved.” Wanda smiled while moving to the dining table, her powers pouring a mug of coffee and floating it over. 

Daisy slid into the seat next to her. “That’s still so cool you can do that with your powers.” 

“I’m not the one who should be able to heat my coffee if it gets cold.” Wanda sipped her own coffee pointedly. 

She brushed some hair behind one ear. “I’m still working on that. It takes a lot of concentration and isn’t how I’ve used my abilities before. I think Darcy is planning on chucking ice cubes at me if I keep stalling on it.” 

“Somehow I have a feeling that will happen whether you succeed or not.” Wanda’s powers prickled as they absently brushed past her.

Daisy relaxed, she could tell it was just Wanda being distracted and still waking up. Her powers were like that sometimes. “You’re probably right. Did you start classes?” 

“I did, I was thinking I should consider getting a job though. What do you think?” Wanda looked at her, and she was ever so slightly visibly nervous. 

“If you want a job I think it’d be good.” Daisy nudged her gently. “You’re an Avenger though. We’d have to get creative to keep people from recognizing you.” 

Wanda softened at the implied approval. “Oh, and what do you suggest as the professional spy?” 

“You wear your hair down when you’re Avenging, and in all the public video and images of you your hair is down. So you’d want it up, a fake visible tattoo on your neck to draw attention away from your face, and no red clothing.” Daisy took a bite of pancake while considering it. “That would about do it. You’d just be another college student working to help make ends meet.” 

Wanda smiled as she cut her pancakes into neat squares. “Do you think I’m wasting my time getting a degree in Social Justice?” 

“No, I think it’ll be very useful. And considering Tony’s paying the bill it’s reasonable you could get a law degree if you want. Which could only be good for the team in the long run. Especially with how everything has been going on.” Daisy elbowed Wanda lightly. “It’s impressive.”

She smiled while finishing her bite before speaking. “We’ll see how undergrad goes before we start talking about law school.” Reaching out Wanda touched her arm. “Thank you, for this.” 

“Anytime.” Daisy grinned, she liked this. No threat of death or the next mission just...breakfast. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I like spending time with you.” 

Wanda kissed her lightly. “You’re better at this girlfriend thing than you give yourself credit for.” 

“Girlfriend huh?” Daisy hummed leaning her forehead against Wanda’s. “Sounds good to me.”

Daisy dropped a box in front of Tony. “Sup.” 

“Well hello Offspring.” Tony looked up. “What is this?”

She let her hands rest on her hips. “Consider it a deeply late congrats on the kids gift. Also a peace offering. Darcy’d bring it but you two have been yelling and or crying at each other for the last week.” 

“What an intervention?” Tony was looking at her curiously. 

With a laugh she crossed her arms, leaning against the wall. “More like part one of two on the intervention. Figured I should stop by and talk with you first. Darcy needs some time with Pepper and Hill. She’s kind of overwhelmed feeling like the only one protecting all of us from the government and media. And you need to not be surrounded by people judging you for grieving.”

He frowned his face harder than it typically was when looking at her. “Would you help the man who murdered your parents?” 

Daisy took a slow minute to consider her response. But honesty was the least of what this man needed. And...as much as she was unsure of things he meant something to her. “I chose SHIELD, I chose the mission, this, over my parents. I didn’t want to, but when the choice came it’s what I picked.” She shifted slightly. “But they were monsters I barely knew. If it was Peter or Darcy?” Her jaw tightened, the room trembled as she considered that option. “I don’t know if I’d do the right thing. The bigger thing. But I know if it wasn’t the end of the world hanging in the balance I’d rip anyone who harmed them to bloody chunks without hesitation.” Her voice was dark, and she meant it.

“Huh.” He slumped slightly. “What do you think I should do since everyone has an opinion on it?” 

“Take a fucking vacation.” Daisy raised a brow. “Stop trying to carry everything. I mean jesus, you’ve had three kids dropped on you, evil government gestapo plots, Hydra, fall out from Sokovia, AIM, the constant political jockeying, hell your relationship with Pepper is on and then off and then back on. The last few years have been crazy. Have you taken two weeks and just gotten away from it all? You’re burning out Poprocks. Take a second to think about what it is you want? Not what other people want from you, just what you want?” 

Tony blinked fairly stupidly at her. “That’s...want me to go hide on a mountain with no technology?” 

“You’d go insane in a week.” She snorted. “We’re not made for techless hellscapes, no matter how pretty. No I hacked into Pepper’s computer, not sorry. You guys have a new branch opening up in India. The new labs down there could use your crazy science head leading the projects. Just tell everyone you’re doing the rich person thing in Tibet, but go do crazy science. Pepper needs to go down there to sign some contracts so you can make it a couples retreat thing too.” 

He wiped his hands, but he wasn’t telling her to get lost. “I thought you’d decided running away was a bad habit of yours?” 

“It is, but sometimes you need some space to feel the ugly stuff before you bother with dealing with it. Like go have a couple of weeks where you can be with the person you love, do the things you love, and be away from just...everything else.” Daisy looked pointedly at the box. “The rest of us will still be here when you get back.”

Tony seemed to come alive ever so slightly. His voice was full of sarcasm. “Throw me out of my own house. I see how it is Offspring.” 

“Tony.” She chided gently. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. And we’re not the touchy feeling conversation ones...or well this whole family thing is turning me into that person.” Her eyes rolled as she realized it was her second vaguely touchy feely conversation. This was Darcy and Peter’s area not hers. “Want to open presents and then hack the pentagon?” 

He looked at her dubiously, but opened up the box. Pulling out the letter he let out an actual laugh. 

Daisy pushed off the wall. “Figured you’d appreciate that.” 

His voice took on a mocking tone as he read out. “We solemnly swear none of us shall name a child Steve, James, Rogers, Grant, or any other tribute to Captain Patriotism or his old timey boy band.” He actually looked amused as he set the card aside. “Really?” 

“Eh, I know Darcy can come across as kinda hard on you. But we’re Team-Stark.” She gave a pointed look at the red and gold scarf he was pulling out of the box. 

Tony wrapped the scarf around his neck and looked at her, but he seemed better somehow. “So why are we hacking the pentagon?” 

“It’s fun? Helps brush off the cobwebs and all that.” Daisy grinned. “Bet I can get in before you get through the second level firewalls.” 

He pointed at her. “The arrogance, you’re on.”

////

Peter spun his new fidget spinner absently while leaning against the cafeteria table. “So Mr Burns seemed kinda iffy on our presentation? That wasn’t just me right?” 

“Our presentation was dope.” MJ shrugged and popped a baby carrot into her mouth. 

Ned nodded. “I thought we did really well, Mr Burns probably just disagreed with our position.” 

“We did so much work.” Peter knew his voice had a bit of a whine to it, but whatever. “I emailed the Wakandan Ambassador's office.” 

MJ punched his shoulder. “It was a good touch. Bringing voices to the countries without power.” 

“Thanks, I’ve been...so bored.” Peter didn’t mention if he listened to another hour of italian mobsters arguing about which sandwiches to order for lunch he was going to tear his hair out. Gathering evidence, and transcribing the bugs was the worst. 

Ned nodded. “It’s been weird without you here dude.” 

“Don’t get sick again, dweeb.” MJ flicked a carrot at him. 

Snatching it out of the air automatically he blinked. “Thanks guys.” He perked up and then eyed the cafeteria suspiciously before sliding a photo across the table towards MJ. “Daisy thinks it’s funny you figured it out.” 

MJ snatched the photo and made a fist bump. “Yes!” She grinned as she carefully slid the signed photo of Quake into her binder. “Thanks, this is awesome.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Oh and Daisy says she can’t take us to the horror movie that came out last week. But Darcy said she’s down for taking us.” Peter reported. 

Ned and MJ high fived. Ned gave him a slightly envious look. “You have the coolest sisters.” He frowned slightly. “Should we be expecting another one to pop out of the woodwork?” 

Peter’s face flushed slightly as he looked down. “Probably not? Daisy checked all the DNA databases she could hack into. But uh...our dad kind of…” 

MJ had a knowing look in her eyes. “Your sisters are pretty badass.” 

He had a bad feeling MJ had put together college student Darcy with slightly snazier Dr Lewis. But he wasn’t going to ask. Cause if she hadn’t started to suspect asking would totally give it away. “So, think we should have our next project on how heroes are portrayed in media?” 

“Ambitious.” MJ indeed. “I like.” 

Ned sighed, his shoulders slumping. “It’s going to be so much work. Can we at least limit it to like a comparison between two heroes?” 

“Limiting the pool? That’s probably smart.” Peter agreed, pulling out a notebook and pen. “Who do you think are comparable?” 

Ned hummed, his brow crinkled. “Black Widow and Captain America? Make it about Gender?” 

“Black Widow is a flipped russian spy assassin. She’s super awesome but...Cap is a military hero. It’s not comparable.” MJ munched another carrot. “What about the new SHIELD’s approach to enhanced vs how the old SHIELD dealt with enhanced people? It’s depressing, we’d get to rip up government hypocrisies and I’m kinda curious about it anyways.” 

Perking up, Ned grinned. “Do you think your sister would help us find some sources?” 

“Using the interviews Ahmed’s been publishing will probably be a better source honestly.” Peter was just pleased he had something interesting to do between transcribing stuff for Daisy and Yuri. Seriously, mobsters were so horrifically boring. 

Peter bent backwards at his knees to avoid a very scary kick. “Woah!” Dropping his hand to the ground he used it to brace himself to kick out, giving himself a chance to roll away, putting distance. 

His kick was batted to one side, forcing him to twist to the left to avoid a stomping foot coming for him. 

Skidding to the side he managed to get to his feet. Peter didn’t stick in one place, he knew better than to hold still. He pushed off, spinning into a kick and then gave a sharp right hook. His right hook landed, sending his opponent stumbling backwards. 

He came to a complete halt. Peter stared at his fist and then at the person he’d just managed to punch in the face. “Oh shitnugget…” He hopped to Daisy’s side. “Are you ok?” 

“I’m good.” She batted his hands away gently with one arm while wiping a trickle of blood away from the corner of her mouth. “That’s quite the arm you’ve got on you.” 

Peter’s hands flapped slightly. “You’re sure I didn’t hurt you?” 

Daisy whacked his shoulder with an open hand. “I’m fine, and good job, I didn’t see that one coming. You’ve got to follow through though.” 

“You’re bleeding.” He winced, and that was very much going to bruise. 

She stared at him, her face a complete deadpan. “Really?” Daisy caught his arm.

He had a brief second to realize he’d made a terrible mistake. His spider sense zipped with alarm. And then he was flipped, slamming into the ground. The air wheezed out of his lungs. 

“Ready to take this seriously?” Daisy’s eyes were sharp as she challenged him. 

Peter nodded while tapping out. “Got it.” 

“Good, just cause one or two hits from you will knock a person down, doesn’t mean us non super strong people can’t still kick your ass.” Daisy released him and then hopped back up to her feet. 

He jumped back up to his feet. “Right, sorry. Follow through.” Peter blinked. “Wait...I actually hit you!” 

“Good job.” Daisy raised her hands into a fighting stance. “Let’s see if you can do it again.” 

Peter couldn’t help how brightly he grinned at that. Holy shit he managed to land a hit! 

////

Pepper speared her salad with perhaps a bit too much prejudice. “So Starks sure generate drama.” 

“I should have run when I heard there were four of them.” Maria was holding her cup of coffee with a sort of slightly obsessive importance. It was clearly her lifeline. Pepper understood. 

May laughed. “They’re something alright. Too many good intentions, too much brilliance and too much heart. Daisy said she was stepping in.” 

“Oh no.” Maria closed her eyes. “Please say she didn’t punch Tony.” 

With an amused smile, May huffed. “No, she brought him a signed card promising none of them will name a child after Steve or any of the Howling Commandos. Also a scarf Darcy made for Tony in his colors. And based off the wafting scent of red bull they probably hacked something they shouldn’t have.” 

“That’s surprisingly sweet.” Pepper found herself softening. She’d assumed Tony was still moping in the workshop, she hadn’t realized. “I’m spending far too much time on the India branch if I’m missing developments like that.” 

If Maria was a touchy person she’d have patted Pepper on the back for that based on her expression of commiseration. “While you’re there to sign the contracts, cut ribbons, etc, Morse put in a request for more additional security than Happy asked for.” 

“More feathers to unruffle then.” Pepper was not looking forward to that. “You were right to recommend Morse as a secretary. She’s highly competent, and her doctorate means she can handle the scientists beautifully.” 

May buttered piece of bread.”I can see that, Hunter and Daisy listen to her.” 

“It’s a magic power.” Maria sliced her sandwich neatly in half. “My theory with Starks is you have to get to them young or else there’s no hope of anything more than channeling their chaos. Though even then... “ 

Pepper felt like laughing at the slightly manic look. “Tony really did a number on you didn’t he?” 

“At least he’s useful. I had to fire George from lobby security. He seemed to think arrogance would be tolerated despite not being notably competent.” Maria looked particularly dangerous for a second. 

May nodded solemnly. “I’ve had a few of those at FEAST. You have to root them out before they can dig their heels in.” 

“What is with men thinking barely competent means incredible and indisposable? I have to have an entire office for people to deal with severance disputes.” Pepper had made the office when she decided she just was not going to deal with it. And that had been before she was CEO. “Tony signed off on it the fourth time I had to leave him unsupervised for more than three hours because he’d fired a lab assistant.” 

Maria took a long drink from her coffee. “I love that office, it halves the amount of people I have to yell at. It's one of the parts of SI that is superior to SHIELD.” 

“You didn’t have an office for dealing with severance disputes?” May asked in horror. 

Maria shook her head. “Oh we had one, it was quite robust but somehow not nearly as competent, and doesn’t have to deal with even the most minor of employees having high level security clearance and being part of a classified secret spy agency.”

“That would be...I’m surprised Hydra didn’t just murder your fired employees to protect themselves.” Pepper remarked while taking a bite of her salad. 

Maria twitched ever so slightly. “Well, Hydra did do that to their members who they didn’t find acceptably competent.” 

“That isn’t surprising. I don’t know why I hadn’t just assumed.” Pepper sipped at her cucumber water. 

May dipped her bread into her soup. “You know a few months ago Hydra wasn’t something that was in any way connected to my life.” She laughed. “I don’t miss that time at all.” 

“True, I wouldn’t want to go back and turn down my recruitment into SHIELD.” Maria raised her coffee mug in a silent cheers. 

Pepper sighed, her lips twitching up. “Life would be quite boring without Stark shenanigans wouldn’t it?”


	31. Tis a Kraken Good Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My dudes! The new job is good, but it's also cutting into writing time. So in like a month I might run out of extra drafts so we might be forced to change to a once a week update schedule. Not sure, I mean I'm still getting like three pages done a day. So it might not. But just a heads up that's a possibility.

Natasha did not like feeling helpless. In fact she loathed it. So standing on the docks with some of New York's most unfortunate emergency workers and staring at the...sea creature slowly making its way towards land was not something she enjoyed. Really it was only the occasional tentacle the size of a metro train that was visible. This was...there were not bullets large enough for this thing, and she was fairly sure batting her eyes at it wasn’t a viable plan. “The Governor?”

“He has all confidence in the Avengers.” Darcy replied, she was sitting on the weapons case of the largest missile she’d been able to requisition from SI. Unfortunately it wasn’t particularly big, seeing as the tower wasn’t a weapons plant. The Stark ringleader’s head cocked to the side. “So do you think we’re dealing with a kraken? Giant octopus from space? Chuthulu’s second cousin?” 

She doubted shooting a missle at it would be effective since they couldn’t even get visual on where it’s main body was. “Rhodey?” 

“Malibu, he’s five hours out.” Darcy reached out and gave her a conciliatory pat on the shoulder. “And no, we can’t make a space wormhole big enough for that sucker.” Darcy snorted. “Sucker.” 

Natasha looked at who they had for help. It wasn’t encouraging. With Banner and Thor MIA since Ultron the team was down two of its heaviest hitters. Stark was doing some wellness and mindfulness thing in India. Steve and Sam had taken Vision with them to deal with a Hydra base in Warsaw. Which left herself, Wanda, Pietro, Spiderman, and Quake as the only enhanced available. 

She supposed if it was an enemy they could just punch in the face there was Daredevil, and a few other enhanced running around that could be recruited. But punching what was essentially a deep sea monster was not the wheelhouse of people whose preferred method of combat was punching. 

Natasha saw the just done with life expression on Lance Hunter’s face. She agreed. “Pietro, can you run on water?” 

“I do not think so.” Pietro was rather pale as he looked at a giant tentacle waving menacingly in the air. “I could try?”

Wanda spoke up. “I could fly us out there, but I can’t keep that many people aloft and fight.” 

“Uh… I’m not so good without things to swing off of?” Spiderman’s white eye holes squinted. “But I’m down for fighting the Kraken.” 

Daisy adjusted one of her gauntlets slightly. “They might call me Quake, but my abilities have to do with vibrations not the ground.” She frowned. “I don’t have practice trying to fly over water though.” 

“I have a really bad idea.” Darcy hopped off the missile case. She actually looked slightly nervous about what she was about to suggest. That was a really, REALLY, terrible sign. “So why don’t we shoot the missile in the general direction of its face?” 

Hunter hugged his rifle closer to himself. “Won’t that just make it angry?” 

“Duh.” Darcy looked at him like that was obvious. 

Pietro frowned. “Why do we want to make the kraken angry?” 

“So it raises its head up out of the water to try to eat us.” Darcy explained, with hand motions. “It makes it easier to hit something we can see.” 

Wanda paled, she’d clearly picked up on something. “Oh no. I do not like this plan. We should not do it.” 

“Wait, oh that plan!” Spiderman hopped. He gave a far too considering look at the wharf and then back at tentacles. “Yeah I could slingshot that far.” 

Natasha had to actually resist an instinctive desire to pinch the bridge of her nose. But she had to ask. She had a terrible idea she knew. “Slingshot what?”

“Quake of course.” Darcy replied glibly. “I mean Wanda would have to pick you up out of the harbor afterwards.” She reached out and patted her sister on the shoulder. “But that thing has to have a brain, just turn it to mush and we can serve kraken sashimi to all of New York for a week.” 

Horrifyingly Daisy was nodding as if that was a logical plan. “It’d at least hurt it, probably. I did liquify a few people’s brains while Hive was in control. Kinda always wondered if I could do it before that.” She shrugged. “What the hell, let’s punch Cthulhu in the face.” 

Natasha really wanted to offer out a different strategy. But SHIELD was mostly west coast focused still, they didn’t have military support, no aerial support, and it was a viable plan. A terrible one, but she’d done worse. “Spiderman start making a web slingshot for Quake. Hunter, prepare to launch our missile at the kraken.” 

“Right, I’m gonna need a minute.” He popped the lid off the case and went to work. It was telling about the straits SHIELD had been in since Hydragate he was accepting this plan with resigned acceptance. 

She turned to Wanda. “Be ready to fly out as quickly as possible. If this fails, get Quake and get out as quickly as possible.” 

Wanda shot a worried look at where Quake and Spiderman were pointing at buildings and arguing about best angles for launch. But she answered all the same. “I can do that.” 

Natasha accepted they were going to do this. She’d feel better if she had a bazooka. 

////

Daisy tested her boot’s grip on the web netting Peter had made. “That’ll do it.” 

“Please don’t get eaten by the kraken.” Peter nudged her. “You know we didn’t make a code for attack by sea monster.” 

“We’ll have to add it to the list.” Her lips pressed together. She knew she was powerful, but this powerful? Daisy’s eyes hardened. It didn’t matter if she was or wasn’t, she had to be. She looked to Wanda who’d followed the two of them after saying something to Natasha. “Think you can help me build up a feedback loop?” 

Wanda hissed. “I can, you’re sure?” 

Daisy ignored the obvious worry her girlfriend was showing. Now wasn’t the time and Wanda wouldn’t appreciate useless platitudes. “We only have one shot at this working.” She rolled her shoulders. “Let’s make sure I have as much power stored up as possible.” 

“You can swim right?” Wanda asked while lighting up with power, her red mist encasing Daisy.

She started radiating her powers, letting them be reverberated back into her. “You should probably get me out of the water pretty fast.” 

Daisy wasn’t sure if Wanda replied or not, her entire focus had turned to increasing the vibrations she was building at different frequencies as they bounced between her and the wall of Wanda’s powers. Her bones were vibrating with it, but she wasn’t losing it, nothing was breaking yet. Her eyes closed, her breathing the only thing besides the power she was generating she could focus on. 

And then the hard part. She had to still it all, letting the power quiet beneath her skin. It was nauseating to have that much energy bound, needing to get out. A single slip of her control and she’d shatter a lot of bones. Daisy opened her eyes, the air still around her. And yup, Wanda definitely had picked up on how narrowly she was holding onto her control. 

Wanda’s head snapped towards Hunter. “Shoot the sea monster! Now!” 

Natasha’s eyes physically widened and then she was turning on Hunter.

And Hunter shot their single person operable missile at the center of the tentacles. The entire pier went silent as they watched the missile arching through the sky. It hit the water. 

The water exploded upwards. Tentacles shot upwards, a deep roaring sound boomed past them. And then a great green...head began to rise up out of the water. Waves crashing off of it’s bulbous gooey form. 

“Giant octopus, not a Cthulhu. Good to know.” Darcy absently uttered into the deafening, horrified, and resounding silence. “The kraken is real?” 

Peter let out a slightly high pitched laugh. “Well this whole thing is kraken me up.” 

“Is this really the time?!” Hunter yelped. 

Daisy blew her breath out. Right, she could do this. She made eye contact with Peter where he was holding the webbing slingshot pulled back. She grinned. “Yeet me already bro.” 

Peter snorted, and then released the slingshot. 

The wind whistled past her as she arched through the air, head first towards the kraken. Her teeth clenched as she kept the energy she was holding from bursting out of her. As she came hurtling closer she felt a bolt of what was probably something similar to terror. She didn’t have time to worry about it. As she closed in she twisted in mid air pulling her fist back. 

The kraken roared from it’s beak like mouth that had teeth. Fun. It’s eyes were yellow, standing out from it’s green bulbous skin. It spotted her too late, it’s tentacles too large and slow to bat her from the air. 

And then she hit it fist first, every ounce of energy she could channel exploding outwards. A scream on her lips as she barely held onto a fraction of control over the amount of energy she was generating.

A wave rippled through the kraken. 

Daisy had a second to laugh. “Oh damn I did it.” And then a tentacle smashed down over her head flattening her as it slammed her into the water. 

Between the cold, the force of it, and the suddenness of it she was stunned as she disappeared under the water. It drove the air from her lungs. She fought, but the tentacle was so wide, she couldn’t get around it, get up, she couldn’t swim! Futility she kicked, trying to do..something, get up. 

An arm scooped around her waist and then she was being hauled sideways. Training took over and she went limp, fighting your rescuer got both of you killed. May’d spent hours and hours drilling that into her head. The water pushed past them. And then they were breaking above the water. 

Daisy choked, spewing water from her mouth. Wheezing, the salt burned her eyes as she squinted at the person holding them above water. “Peter?” 

“Holy shit nuggets that was awesome!” Peter tightened his grip around her middle. 

She sucked in air. Damn, Peter had to have launched himself right after her to have gotten here in time. “Thanks.” 

“You don’t get to call me Dumb Dumb anymore.” He leaned his forehead to the side of her head for a minute before pulling back, breathing hard. “You can’t swim! Why would you do that if you couldn’t swim!” 

Daisy blinked, she looked at the limited view she had. The water had a disgusting green color to it. The tentacle that had hit her was just sort of...laying in the water. And that was it’s head towering above them? But like lower than it’d been before. “Is it...dead?” 

“You blew out the back of it’s head.” Peter’s voice was awed. “Which is unbelievably cool! I mean damn. That was so badass.” 

She relaxed further in her brother’s grip. The yellow eye she could see did look kinda cloudy now that she was looking for it. “So dead?” 

“Super dead.” Peter confirmed. “Like you know when you and Darcy shot those watermelons? Like that.” 

Daisy huffed in relief, and god her throat hurt. But excellent. “Quake powers beat sea monster.” 

“Yeah, Quake loses to water.” He countered. 

She shrugged while letting herself float, trusting Peter to keep her above water. “So Darcy’s plan to just Yeet me at a sea monster. Do you think we should be concerned by that?” 

“I mean it worked? Also objectively awesome.” Peter puffed. “And never made a slingshot that cool before.” 

Daisy smiled fondly. “Yeah, that was pretty awesome.” 

Peter raised a hand waving as red light came into view above them. “DOWN HERE!”

Wanda swiftly descended red light wrapping around them and lifting them out of the water. “You are both insane.” 

“Sup.” Daisy smiled, she wrapped an arm around Peter’s shoulders. God she was exhausted that had taken a lot out of her. “Thanks for the pick up.” And huh, she was actually freezing cold. 

Daisy’s shivering was mostly gone as she sat on a crate, several emergency blankets wrapped around her, and a cup of hot tea cradled in her hands. “So Coast Guard has clean up?” 

“If the governor knows what’s good for him they do.” Darcy brandished a towel. “Let’s get your hair dry and then you’re going straight to the Tower.” 

She didn’t fight as her sister dropped the towel over her hand and started aggressively drying her hair. It was a bit of a lost cause. Between kraken goop and sea water she was going to need a shower the moment she got home. Daisy frowned slightly. “Wait, why am I going to the tower?” 

“Because you are covered in kranen goo and you’re getting x-rayed for fractures or broken bones even if I have to strap you down.” Darcy pulled the towel away and scrunched up her nose at the remnants of goo coating it. “We should make sea monsters from a Lovcraftian nightmare code Goopy Soupy.”

Daisy couldn’t help her amused expression at that. “We can add it to the list since you’re kidnapping me.” 

“Wait, what’s this about kidnapping? I thought we didn’t kidnap?” Peter’s voice asked as he bounced over, Spiderphone very clearly recording. 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Just telling your partner she's coming back to the Tower to make sure she didn’t break anything punching the evil octopus/kraken thing in the face.” She shot a look at Daisy. “You can use my apartment. I know the tower has better water pressure then your place.” 

“You should do that!” Peter seemed to forget he was recording as he focused on them. “I mean you were underwater for a while before I got to you.” 

Daisy sighed, but honestly just felt a warm sort of affection for her siblings, besides she had a feeling Wanda was going to be hunting her down as soon as the opportunity presented itself. “I wasn’t arguing. And I didn’t break anything.” 

She pointedly ignored as Peter narrated gratitude that Darcy had provided the missile and waxed on with commentary about events. It was nice, and honestly he was far better at the social media stuff then her. Daisy quietly sipped at her coco. This superhero thing wasn’t too bad. Her eyes settled on Wanda who was using Hunter as a shield against the cameras. Her smile spread across her face. No, this hero thing was kinda awesome.

////

Darcy proudly hit the print button of the evening news image that was going to be around the world by the end of the night. It was a glorious image of Daisy punching the kraken in the face. A reporter had clearly taken it with a telephoto lens. But it was the most compelling of a series of shots documenting the whole thing. Personally her favorites were of Peter recklacly jumping off a flailing tentacle before diving into the water right after Daisy. 

It was good for the media, no casualties, clear and horrifying threat stopped dead. Also the long distance photos of Peter and Daisy floating in the water pre-Wanda pick up, very much looked like they were making out. Which meant it was excellent professionally and privately. Darcy didn’t intend to let them live it down even when they were all old and grey. 

She looked up at the sound of a knock on the door. “FRIDAY did Tony change permissions to my apartment again?” 

-”No, Mr Maximoff is awaiting permission to enter.”-

Darcy’s brow scrunched slightly, but she was curious. “Let him in FRIDAY.”

-”As you wish Dr Lewis.”-

She stayed curled up on the couch, but set her laptop aside. “Did you need something Pietro?” 

“Your couch.” Pietro’s eyes had a certain look to them as he zipped in front of her. “And vodka, all the vodka.” 

Darcy actually leaned back at that. “Why do you look like you just had a bucket of ice water chucked at you?” Well without being dripping wet, but the horrified stunned expression was pretty close to the time Peter had helped her dump a bucket of ice water on the speedster. So tomato, tomato.

“Your sister is in my apartment.” He looked at her expectantly. 

She blinked. “She’s over at your apartment like half the days of the week?”

“Half the days of the week she’s hacking into something while Wanda reads course material for her classes. Or Wanda is teaching her to not burn down the kitchen. She’s ‘in’ my apartment in my apartment.” Pietro’s expression could best be described as a cringe. 

It dawned on her what he was implying. “Oh, OH.” She cocked her head to the side. “Don’t you have soundproof walls?” 

“Wanda automatically leaves a faint empathetic link open when we’re near each other.” He looked truly pained. “It’s subconscious.” 

Darcy snorted out right. “Oh you poor boy, did you get your sister’s frisky feels on accident?” 

“It’s not funny.” He grumbled. “Can I please sleep on your couch. Your apartment’s far enough I’m safe.” 

Nodding, she gestured to the second couch. Because of course an apartment provided by Tony would have a second couch. “Me casa et tu casa. But really, how has this not happened before?” 

“Uh...we’ve only had powers for a few years and Wanda must have shut off the connection when I had company. Or it’s new? She never said anything” Pietro looked uncomfortable. “Vodka? I’d like to forget this ever happened.” 

She waved at the kitchen. “Go for it. It’s on top of the fridge, juice inside. Grab me some too.” Darcy shook her head in amusement as she pulled her laptop back to her. “Want to help with the Spiderquake scrapbook?”

“The what?” He blurred behind the couch, his head curiously peeking over her shoulder to see what she was doing. 

Darcy proudly pulled up some files. “The media is convinced Peter and Daisy, or Quake and Spiderman are in ‘true love’. Which is hilarious. But because it protects Peter we’re not doing anything to stop it. Which means, I’m documenting everything. Years worth of blackmail material dropped into my lap.” 

Pietro’s face turned amused. “Are there fanvideos?” 

“Oh my sweet summer child.” She patted the seat next to her. “I have a whole new world to share with you.”

Darcy munched on her popcorn as obnoxiously as possible. She squinted at the screen. “Kid maybe hang the mugger a solid five feet lower so people can actually cut them down.”

-’Huh?”- The video from Peter’s goggles shifted as if he was frowning under his mask. They’d have to adjust it’s responsiveness to his face...or maybe leave it. It did help humanize him. 

“It takes ladders to get a mugger down if you leave them dangling like a pinata.” She flicked a kernel of corn up and caught it with her teeth. “Also I saw those looks, you’re leaving the spider sweater on.” 

-”You're worse than Aunt May. I look ridiculous.”- He grumbled as the swinging of the camera in his eye lenses stilled. He’d evidently landed on something appropriately high. 

She snorted. “The suit is awesome, but it’s too thin to have temperature control. Even I’m not that awesome, yet. The heights of my intelligence have yet to be reached. So give it a couple years and I might figure something out. And stop hanging them up head first. You’re going to give someone a concussion.” 

-”Fine.”- Peter’s lense camera scanned the streets he was perched above. -”Hey Darcy, what’s a good first date?”-

Darcy grinned. “Depends on the girl buckeroo. So tell me, what’s her name?” 

-“Gwen, she’s my lab partner in biology.”- His voice was clearly nervous. -”She’s a junior, president of the science club and super smart and I really like her.”- 

She felt like laughing, her baby bro clearly had a type. “Your thing is smart girls who can tell you what to do?” 

-”What?! No. That’s stupid.”- He yelped. 

Darcy bit her lip, if Peter wasn’t fourteen she’d drag him for how clearly transparent he was about his type. She gave it a year tops before he realized his friend MJ was exactly his type. Which that would be a crisis of emotions like any crush on a friend. But right now it was a probably hopeless crush on an older girl. “So she’s what sixteen?” 

-”Yeah. But she laughs at my jokes and just at me! And sometimes does this hair thing and I think maybe I have a chance?”- 

She hummed. “Well a movie date is a classic, and you know Daisy or I’d make sure you had a car ride. Now the important part is you have to make sure you don’t vomit feelings all over this girl.”

-”Right...how do I not vomit feelings all over?”- His voice pitched up. 

She smiled while spinning herself in her wheely chair. “Do not utter the word ‘love’. You let her know you like her, suggest a date, and make sure she knows you’ll still be the best bio partner and not going to get creepy on her. You are a smart, cute boy and if she doesn’t say yes we’ll have ice cream and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.” 

-”Wait...what?”- 

“Girls don’t want to be burdened with your feelings when you ask them out. So you tell her you like her, you’d like to take her on a movie date but if she doesn’t want to that’s ok. Listen well young padawan, girls are not mysterious. They want to feel safe to say yes or no. Most girls aren’t going to take down gods with a taser like Mwua or are human weapons like our sister.” 

Peter’s visuals nodded. -”I can do that.”-

“Good, and if she says no we’ll mope with you.” Darcy popped some more popcorn into her mouth. “Also do you have an outfit picked out for the big ask?”


	32. Family, Friends, and Food

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup! I'd like to just point out I'm amused by how the holidays in this fic do not line up with the holidays in the world. Also yes I know Thanksgiving is a politically fucked up holiday. But like all Americans I pretend that isn't the case while I eat my turkey. Considering I spent over two years working for the local tribe here and actually help when possible with said tribe I think I'm on the less of an asshole side of things when it comes to the topic? I think? I don't know. Everything is a historically nightmarish legacy of racism, sexism, and violence here...you just kinda try to do the best you can to acknowledge and fix shit when can. But I'm not going to politically dissect the historical realities of Thanksgiving in a fic. I'm just...I'm not.

May marshelled her minions. She’d never had so many before, or such a lovely kitchen, or had so many mouths to feed before. But Thanksgiving was a family event and her family had expanded exponentially. “Out! I don’t want to see a single Stark in this kitchen!” She jabbed her finger at Tony. “And go change your shirt, you’re a grown man. Your apartment or not you are not wearing a grease stained shirt to dinner.” 

“It’s my apartment. I’ll wear what I want.” Tony looked far too smug. 

She was unimpressed. “If you want pie you will.”

“I’ll eat his portion of pie!” Peter hollard from the other room, he practically appeared hanging off the wall looking around eagerly. “I will totally eat any available options for more pie.” 

May saw her option for getting rid of Tony before he did something to try and speed up the cooking process. No tech in the kitchen. Ever. “Peter dear why don’t you go make sure your father wears something that is at least clean. And you were wanting to show him your group project you did on the new UN Boarders resolution weren't you?” 

She turned back to the kitchen, Peter could handle Tony. “Pietro chop the potatoes and don’t think I didn’t see you try to stab your sister.” May snagged the turkey baster he’d been trying to use as a weapon out of his hand. 

“Do you need me to form the rolls? The dough is done rising.” Wanda looked over at her from where she’d been prepping the brussel sprouts. 

May smiled. “Please, I think Darcy will be skyping her parents longer than planned.”

“I’ve got it.” Wanda smiled as she pulled the dish towel off the bowl of dough. “Worst case we can recruit Daisy for help, she’s actually getting much better.” 

She set the fry pan on the oven and grabbed the bacon. “Once the SHIELD group gets here we’ll need her to run interference between Tony and them.” 

“Won’t Pepper help with that?” Pietro chimed in.

May almost laughed, oh to still be that in the dark about Stark chaos. “Four SHIELD agents and Tony?”

“Fair.” Pietro allowed, clearly having had it click in his head. 

Daisy popped her head into the kitchen. “My ears are burning. Are you sure I can’t help with anything?”

“You can finish setting the table since Peter’s making your father put on a clean shirt. And no powers.” May barely kept from giving away how actually adorable it was that Daisy’s eyes were very much flicking towards Wanda. Honestly, the two of them orbited eachother far too much to still be ‘just’ anything. 

May turned and spotted Wanda who looked like she’d just been caught stealing from the cookie jar. Empathic mind voodoo powers. Honestly. She rolled her eyes and patted the girl’s shoulder and went back to her oyster dressing. “Pietro chop the yams before you go play video games!” 

The apartment’s doorbell rang. May gave a quick check of the kitchen, nothing that couldn’t be left unsupervised for a few minutes. Grabbing a dish towel she whipped her hands and headed for the door. What clearly was the SHIELD team was being welcomed in by a vibrating with excitement Daisy. 

They were exactly as they’d been described. Middle aged insurance salesman look alike, had to be Phil Coulson. He was looking at Daisy like a proud father as she excitedly welcomed them in. Just behind his shoulder was who had to be the other May. Which left the two the same age as the brilliant Fitzsimmons she’d heard so much about. The one who had to be Jemma lunged past Phil to hug Daisy. 

May smiled as she reached the group. “Come on it, it’s good to finally meet you all.” 

“Aunt May.” Daisy grinned as she stepped back from hugging her best friend. “This is my old team, Coulson, May, Jemma, and Fitz. Guys this is Aunt May.” 

Phil Coulson held out his hand. “It’s wonderful to meet someone Daisy’s spoken so highly of.” 

“I feel the same way.” May shook the man’s hand and then the other May’s. 

Jemma just laughed. “It’s lovely to meet you.” Her eyes lit up as she spotted Peter bouncing in. “Peter! I had an idea about preventing the dendrotoxin from turning into a gas.” 

Peter beamed as he reached them. “Is it a new bonding agent? Cause I was thinking if we experimented with the composition of the web it might let us have more flexibility in what we can introduce.” 

May sighed and ruffled her nephew’s hair. She looked up and realized she was sharing an amused expression with Phil. “So can any of you cook? Because I have a feeling my assistants are about to desert me.” 

“I’ve been told I’ve got a bit of a dab hand in the kitchen.” Phil took a box from Fitz. “And we brought wine.” 

Daisy looked at the box and laughed. “Is that the wine we stole from the human traffickers? How did you get the blood off?” 

“I made a new solution for removing dried blood. It’s been really useful for…” Jemma trailed off. 

All of the agents, including Daisy, had stilled and turned towards May in unison. Well except for ninja May who just grabbed the box and marched into the kitchen with it. 

May sighed. “Is the wine at least not contaminated?” 

“It’s fine, we didn’t bring any of the bottles with compromised seals.” Jemma assured her.

She barely kept from laughing. “Well thank you for bringing wine.” At least Daisy’s family wore pants, Erik had lost his for the third time already.

////

Darcy gave a final wave as she hung up her call with the parents. She hopped off the guest bed she’d been stretched out on while closing the laptop. She winced at the time. “Shitnuggets the rolls!” Scrambling off the bed she paused...May or Wanda would have prevented the dough from being ruined. Nodding to herself she moved more sedately. 

She was leaving the guest room when she heard the faintest bump from the linen closet. Darcy smirked, oh she would bet money if there was anyone else in the hall she knew who. Instead of leaving well enough alone she just opened the door and leaned against the door jam. “Well hello.” 

“Fuck, Darcy.” Daisy glared at her, the flushed face undercut the attempted indignation. 

Darcy smirked. “How about that, sneaking away from kitchen duty to make out with the girlfriend.” 

Wanda rolled her eyes as she continued to lean against the closet shelves. “Daisy is banned from the kitchen.” 

“Fair, did you blow something up?” Darcy was living for this. 

Daisy made a sound of minor outrage. “I did not.” 

“Likely story.” Her lips somehow quirked up even more. “So ditching the guests?” 

Wanda sighed seeming to accept Darcy wasn’t going anywhere. “Your scientists, Peter, and Daisy’s scientists have taken over the living room.” 

“Huh, should have seen that coming.” Darcy nodded to herself. Well, with May and Pepper there no explosions would probably occur. “You do realize your brother can tell exactly what you two lovebirds are doing though?” 

Wanda opened her mouth and then turned bright red. She squeezed Daisy’s shoulder before slipping past them both. “I need to go talk to Pietro.” 

“Have fun.” Darcy waved before turning back to Daisy. “Thought you two were keeping things on the DL?” 

Daisy ran a hand through her hair, pushing it back. “Really? Do you have to?” 

“I really, really do.” Darcy waved for Daisy to get out of the closet. “Young love, so sweet.” She whipped theatrically at her cheek as if to wipe a tear away. 

Daisy groaned, and shoved her slightly as she stepped into the hall. “You are the actual worst.” 

“It’s my duty as older sister. I have years to make up for.” Darcy slung her arm over Daisy’s shoulders, dragging them close enough she could press their cheeks together. “You’re my adorable baby sis. Tis my duty.” 

Daisy snorted. “You still suck.” 

“So how’s the chaos of the fams being smooshed together?” She asked as they trooped towards the sound and smell of Thanksgiving. 

Daisy softened, her prickliness soothing slightly. “Coulson and the Mays are in the kitchen, the rest have taken over the living room.” 

“Pietro hiding in a corner with the chips?” Darcy snickered. 

Shoulders vibrating with humor Daisy laughed. “He’s hiding in the corner with chips.” 

“Excellent. Well team science calls. Have fun, try not to spend too much time making out with our favorite witch.” Darcy pressed a sloppy, smacking kiss to Daisy’s cheek. Grinning she trotted to the kitchen. “My peeps! What up?” 

Daisy called after her. “I thought your team science was calling you?”

“I’m a social butterfly.” Darcy waved off while reveling in the resigned misery on May II’s face. “Ipod Thief! Mays, need help? Or am I free to go find out what world ending crazy is happening over there?” 

Aunt May flicked a dish towel at her. “We’re just supervising the oven. Go have fun.” 

“Gotcha.” Darcy winked at Coulson for funsies and then trotted into the living room. She leaned over where Tony was sitting, resting her head on top of his curly hair. “So what are we debating the probability of?” 

Jane looked up from where she was scribbling on a Starkpad. “The theoretical implications of time travel.” 

“Oh! Nice, closed loop, causality, alternate timelines? What are we talking?” Darcy was so here for this. 

The curly haired guy who had to be Fitz perked up. “Well that’s the thing isn’t it, we don’t know. I subscribe to the belief that once you’ve gone back your actions won’t change anything. After all, all of time and space is happening at the same time. So what has yet to happen has already happened.” 

“But if it’s all happening at the same time then changing something isn’t rewriting…….” 

Darcy nibbled on a carrot. “Ok why are we watching football? Are any of us sport people? I mean the only people who can run more than a block without wheezing here are ninjas.” 

“Americans.” Fitz scoffed from where he was working on a tiny holo table with Tony on a new prosthetic. To be fair she was messing with their design from her phone. 

Pietro nodded in agreement with Fitz from where he was crushed next to Wanda. “We play real football in the rest of the world.” 

“Boo!” Darcy chucked a throw pillow at his head. 

Wanda caught the pillow in mid air. “No fighting.” She tossed the pillow lightly to where Peter and Jemma had their heads together, muttering about dendrotoxin.

“Can someone explain why we’ve been here for so long and there’s still so much time on the clock?” Daisy asked. 

Tony made a wounded noise, pressing a hand to his chest. “I own a team. How can my own Offspring know so little? That settles it we’re going to the Superbowl.” 

“What?!” Daisy looked slightly alarmed. “No, that is a terrible idea. We’re both major targets, and the Superbowl is a giant dish of civilians.” 

Darcy blinked. “You own a football team? What team do you even own?” 

////

Coulson sipped at his glass of wine, while leaning against the counter. “Should we intervene?” 

“Oh leave them to it.” Pepper replied while topping herself up on wine. “It’s their version of bonding, and it’s not time travel.” 

He looked over where the kids had somehow divided into a multi-front war. “I suppose Stark can afford anything they break.” 

“At least Wanda is guarding the table.” May Parker sighed. She looked at him pointedly. “But the balcony might be a bit safer.” 

He smiled at the woman. “You know I think some fresh air is just what I need before we try and eat all this food.” Coulson waved the women goodbye while making his way out to the balcony outside the massive apartment. It was refreshingly quiet out here. And no astrophysicists with manic lights in their eyes commanding their intern to help them whack Tony for some reason. Not that anyone really needed one. Man’s smug face was enough of a reason. 

“Sup.” Daisy looked over her shoulder and raised her own glass of wine in greetings. 

Coulson settled next to her elbow, looking out at the city down below them. “They’re good people.” 

“Yeah, they really are.” She took a swig of her wine. “Are you guys going to stay longer than just today?” 

He sighed. “No, Mace needs us and Mack and Elena can only hold the fort for so long. But any missions this side of the country we’ll jump on. You should see at least some of us more often.” 

“I’ve missed you.” Daisy’s gaze stayed on the skyline. 

Shifting he bumped their shoulders together. “We’ve all missed you too. It’s not the same without you.” He chuckled. “I think Mace would pay you whatever you wanted to bring you and your good press back to SHIELD.” 

“I miss the work sometimes but it wasn’t good for me. I didn’t have anything outside of the team. Hunter was right when he said it was a job.” She looked at him. “Yes, I willingly got a therapist.”

Coulson wrapped an arm around her pulling her into a side hug for a long moment before dropping his arm back to his side. “I shouldn’t have pushed you as hard as I did. You never even took a vacation once we recruited you.” 

“Yeah that was messed up. Don’t burn your agents out AC.” She smiled, her tone teasing in such a way it took the bite of her words. “But really I wouldn’t have let you stick me on down time.” 

He huffed. “Yeah, we’re pretty bad at work/life balances.” Coulson looked behind them at the apartment full of people who they both loved. “You’re managing that here?” 

“I’m trying.” Daisy turned, letting her back rest against the balcony railing. “I’m going to be on America Ninja Warrior in a couple weeks. Meeting up with my ‘ninja’ trainer next week.”

Coulson smirked, his kid was going to kick ass. “They won’t know what hit them.” 

“I’ll take care of an inhuman intake for you if you get May the weekend off to come down for it?” 

“Deal.” He sipped at his wine. “So what are you doing out here?” 

“It was a lot of people, just needed a breath of fresh air.” Daisy finished off her wine. “Think we can hide out here till the turkeys are done?” 

He smiled. “I think we could manage that.” 

“So, do I want to know why Jane keeps clutching her tablet every time you look at her?” Daisy looked at him with a raised brow. 

Coulson stared at her. “I know Darcy’s told you about the ipod and equipment stealing incident after the hammer.” 

“Well yeah, but it’s Darcy. Half of it could be embellishment. Did she really come for SHIELD with a letter campaign?” Daisy asked. 

His shoulders slumped slightly. “Complete with pink paper and glitter pen. Two hundred and thirty seven letters till the intern found her ipod.”

“Sounds right.” She looked at him. “Why didn’t you recruit her again?” 

Coulson watched the chaos inside. Darcy had marshelled Erik, Jane and Ian behind one of the couches, returning fire against Tony, Fitz, Jemma and Peter who were behind the other couch. The Maximoffs had fled for the kitchen. “I made the offer, but she’s not suited for it.” 

“And I was?” Daisy looked at him in disbelief. 

He didn’t let her brush it off. “You are, you’re great at it. One of the greats. I was hoping you’d be Director instead of Mace.” 

“Me?” Daisy pointed at herself in disbelief. 

Coulson could see that she looked healthier here after less than a year away from SHIELD. She was clearly getting more sunlight, the dark circles, that certain gauntness and signs of physical stress barely noticeable. Younger really, she looked her age instead of easily passing as several years older at first glance. “Being a superhero suits you.” 

“Come on.” Daisy squeezed his arm before pushing off the balcony, clearly her tolerance for praise had been reached. “I think Pepper is about to call an end to the pillow fight.” 

////

Peter closed his eyes and hummed in joy as he took his first bite of the turkey. So good. He loved thanksgiving food. “So good.” 

“Chew with your mouth shut.” Aunt May chided gently. 

He chewed while grabbing the passing bowl of gravy. “Sorry.” 

“This looks lovely.” Pepper praised while dishing up a slightly concerning amount of brussel sprouts onto her plate. 

Jemma politely snagged the gravy from him. “Do you know how enhanced your metabolism is?” 

“Uh we’re still figuring that out, cause like I’m still growing. But your notations on increasing vitamins and protein were really helpful. But even with that I eat about twice what the average guy my age does.” He explained while grabbing the potatoes. “Does that inhuman with gills really have a fully integrated respiratory system?” 

Jemma nodded. “Yes, he has to spend time under water or his gills get inflamed. But-”

“No shop talk.” Coulson interrupted. He seemed to pout slightly as most of the table looked at him in disbelief. “Nothing graphic over food.” 

“Fine.” All the SHEILD agents replied. 

Peter stuck his tongue out at Daisy automatically replying right along with her old team. 

It didn’t take long for the sounds of various conversations around the table to fill the room. Laughter, some slightly heated debate on AIs between Fitz and Tony, what was probably a slightly traumatizing agent talk based on Aunt May’s face, apologies as Ian mopped up the wine he’d just managed to dump on Darcy. It was warm and wonderful. Peter leaned closer to Dr Jemma Simmons and kept his voice pointedly too quiet for May or Coulson to hear over the general din. “So about those gills?” 

Peter sighed contentedly as he lay stretched out, post feast. “We’re watching a Christmas Story right?” 

“Oh classic.” Darcy reached up and high fived him from where she was being swallowed up by a beanbag. 

Tony frowned. “Which one is that again? Also, isn't it a bit early to be watching christmas movies?” 

“It’s tradition.” Peter explained. “And it’s the best.” 

Ian made a confused sound. “Americans.” He then yelped as Daisy flicked some vibrations at him. 

“No powers.” Aunt May interceded. “I think we’ve all had quite enough of that for the day.” 

Daisy didn’t look sorry at all from where she was leaning against Wanda’s shoulder. “Sorry Aunt May.” 

Fitz chimed in from the armchair he and Jemma were squished into. “Do you think we could watch a Child’s Christmas in Wales afterwards? My Ma and I always watched that one.” 

Tony waved a hand. “FRIDAY, que up the movies.” He sent a glare at Darcy. “My suit better not start playing Mariah Carrie.” 

“I saw on the news your suit malfunctioned in Afghanistan.” Coulson remarked, he seemed far too pleased from his seat. The glint in his eye gave way his amusement. 

Daisy grinned, far too triumphant. “It’s a self replicating virus and he didn’t get it all when he first tried to clean up the suit’s systems. So it’s spread to all of them now.” 

“And you haven’t helped prevent all of the Ironman suits from singing Baby Shark?” Ian twitched as he stared at Daisy. “You are a very scary lady.” 

Darcy’s chin tipped up in pride. “She makes the cyber weapons, I use them.” 

“I will make you a weapon of your choice to anyone who can get rid of that infernal song.” Tony said while topping off his wine glass.

“But watching you suffer is so much fun.” Darcy teased. 

Daisy snickered into Wanda’s shoulder. The two of them weren’t even pretending not to look like a couple. It filled him with a sort of relieved warmth every time he saw them. 

Aunt May passed a glass of wine to Pepper with a commiserating look. “Alright, is everyone staying for the movie?”

Jane’s head jerked up from where she’d been scribbling into her Starkpad, her back resting against Darcy’s knees. “Yes?”

“I think I’ll pop off.” Dr Erik stood up. “It really has been…..lovely.” He grasped May’s hand and smiled at her before toddling off. 

“Goodbye! Remember pants tomorrow!” Darcy called after the man. 

There were a round of goodbyes from everyone. 

“Anyone else?” May looked around them and then sat down next to Peter. “Alright FRIDAY.” 

Peter settled comfortably against his Aunt as the opening of his favorite Christmas movie came up on the large screen, the lights for the room dimming as well. “Best Thanksgiving ever.” And the pie hadn’t even been sliced up yet!


	33. Ethics, Ninjas, Fires, and an Olive Branch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'd just like to say the response to this fic has blown me away. You guys are legit the best.

Darcy tapped her finger in time with the beat and hummed around the lollipop she was working her way through. She frowned as she looked at the latest readouts of her last project. “Ya know it’s just not right.” 

“What isn’t right?” Ian poked his head up from the truly horrifically boring data input he was working on. 

She pulled the lollipop out of her mouth. “That so many power sources can be weaponized. I mean I could make all sorts of high end tech powered by arch technology but it’d be like giving proto-bombs to the public. Which is why I had to stop working on further miniaturizing arch technology.” 

Ian spluttered. “But arch technology can’t be miniaturized further than Stark did. The power would burn through any material on earth if condensed any further.” 

“You read the specs. I’m impressed padawan.” Darcy waved her hand. “And an arch reactor isn’t the only application of arch technology. I’ve been trying to create self charging batteries based off arch designs. Less power, but more than any current tech is capable of. But again, I can make a battery the size of a nickel with enough power to run a small car. Problem is a couple dozen of them could blow a city block.” 

Ian’s face furrowed. “Does it ever bother you?” 

“What?” She looked at him curiously. It might be the first time she’d seen him legitimately struggling with something. And that was including when they’d broken up after their brief thing in London. 

He bit at his lower lip. “Well I love what we do right? It’s amazing.” His eyes definitely were a little starry there. “It’s such an honor to be working for Dr Selvig and Dr Foster. But...we’re making portals. We could mess up and create a black hole that swallows the planet. Or what if we make a portal to a planet with hostile aliens and it’s seen as an act of war? Or what if we accidentally mess up and affect another planet's gravitational field, or core stability? We could be making planet destroying tech and not even know it!”

“Oh the crazy science ethical questioning. Lik the whole accidental creation of weapons of incomprehensible destruction and death.” Darcy nodded. “I’m surprised you noticed that. But yeah, we’re creating crazy shit here. Hell I’m manipulating the world media and thus world governments. We passed reasonable ethical lines like...a while ago.” 

Ian stilled his eyes widening. “What?” HIs voice squeaked slightly. 

Darcy sighed while waving her hand with her lollipop in it as she spoke. “Did you not watch my last interview with Time? You think keeping the government from openly arresting, torturing, experimenting on and using enhanced is easy?” 

“Uh…” Ian was now gaping at her. 

She rolled her eyes. “It’s like this. We’ve got power for dumbass reasons. With the portals cause we be the smartest cookies in the bunch that also have the nicest toys and funding. So we build the portals. Then once we build ‘em we patent the shit out of them after stripping them down to their most basic and least dangerous state. Like once we have them working, we make it so they can’t do the really scary stuff. Like my batteries. Supes cool, but if I released that shit as is now it’d be supes dangerous. So I make the scary version, then work it backwards till I have a version with built in design flaws to prevent catastrophe. Same reason I lie my ass off in interviews and am helping my grandparents’s murderer go free. I mean poor sod was brainwashed as fuck, but still.” 

Ian spluttered. “You knew!?”

“Duh. Since like New Mexico. I fail to get why no one puts together portal and dangerous. But it's kinda obvious if you ask me.” She stuck her lollipop back in her mouth, the candy clicking against her teeth. “I recommend copious amounts of chocolate for your existential crisis. Also tequila. Just so much tequila.” 

Darcy stepped into the Hulk room. She dropped her two cases on the floor. “Sup dudes.” 

“Darcy? What are you doing here?” Steve startled from where he was reading a newspaper. 

“I bringith an arm and a new hobby for our favorite one armed assassin.” She announced, grabbing the top case she hauled it to the coffee table and dropped it with a resounding thud. 

James stared at her. “What?” 

“You need a prosthetic and nobody is going to assign making a prosthetic for you to someone who’s not in the know and supes vetted. Which means me or Tony.” She raised a pointed brow. “And not even Tony is socially stupid enough to ask someone to make a prosthetic arm to replace the one that murdered their parents. So it’s me or forever being lopsided.” 

Steve shifted over, leaving room for her on the couch. “Thank you.” 

“Totes dude. Heads up this one isn’t designed for combat.” She flicked open the clasps and opened up the case. The arm was sleek, but a white silicone base. Clean lines, but they all had a purposefully natural look to them. More like natural muscles than anything else. 

James reached out and touched it. “It’s soft.” 

“Well figured it should be as obviously non-weaponry as possible. It’ll give you roughly as much strength as my very wimpy human muscles give me. Based off my own abilities.” She grinned. “Go on, pick it up.” 

James carefully lifted the arm, frowning slightly as he turned it over in his hand. “This is certainly something.” 

“Want help attaching it?” Darcy grinned. “Your new hobby is going to be knitting. It’ll let the programing sync up and help you learn how to use it.” She leaned back with a bright grin of victory. “So you both naming your first born after me or what?”

////

Kyle Richmond stretched his arm out while waiting. He bounced anxiously. He got lucky with his celebrity for the whole Red Nose charity run. No silly actor or tv personality who’d mostly be a beginner he’d need to spend hours a day for weeks getting ready to do three or four of the obstacles. He got the honest to god superhero who regularly jumped off buildings. 

He bounced excitedly, the camera crews all set to record their first meeting. They’d only really have to put up with all the cameras a couple of times over the next month. Still, it was going to be crazy getting to work with Quake. Kyle, and the whole camera crew perked up as the door opened. 

In walked Quake, she wasn’t wearing her hero outfit. Instead while she was wearing her mask, she was wearing yoga pants, and loose workout shirt over a tank top. She waved. “What up!” 

Kyle stepped forward and held out his hand. “Kyle Richmond.” 

“Quake.” She accepted his hand and shook it. Her hand was cauloused and her grip firm. “So I hear we’re going to be working together?” She had a friendly smile on her face. 

He beamed, oh thank god she didn’t seem like a bitch. “Yup, I’m going to be your ninja trainer. I was thinking we could go over the course and talk about the types of obstacles you’ll be dealing with and chat about what we should be working on? Just for today. That and get to know each other a bit.” 

“Sounds like a plan.” She glanced around at the camera crew. “So anything I should know about how all this works before we get started?” 

Kyle chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. “No, it’s all good. They’ll just sorta follow us around, probably stop by to film some of the training. But like we’ll only be five to ten minutes of time on the show so they won’t need that much footage for that.”

“Cool, and it’s probably weird for you to be calling me Quake all the time. Sorry about that.” She shrugged. 

Kyle waved her further into the gym. “So first obstacle is going to be the floating steps, then cannonball drop, flywheels, block run, the battering ram, and then finally the warp wall.”

Quake’s lips pulled up into something distinctly concerning. “I was thinking, sure it’s all well and good to get the first half of the course done. But I think we should try for the whole thing.” 

“The whole…” He gave her a long up and down. She was certainly in excellent shape, and he’d seen the trick videos she and Spiderman put out. “Let’s see where you are and then see if that’s doable in the time frame we have. But the salmon ladder?” 

Quake rolled her shoulders and looked pointedly at the gym’s salmon ladder. “Well, let’s see if I can do it. My first SO certainly had me doing enough pull ups that I’ll be disappointed in myself if I can’t.” 

“Have you already stretched?” He checked, he was not going to be the one to take down a superhero with a muscle cramp. Or worse actual damage. 

She laughed good naturedly. “I had to get here by quake, I’ve stretched.” 

“Well let’s see what you can do then.” He politely led them towards the salmon ladder. “So not sure if you know this but my background was in gymnastics and I run a parkour gym now.”

Quake rolled her shoulders. “I am, Nighthawk ninja huh?” 

Kyle’s cheeks heated at her knowing his silly stage name. “You googled me?” 

“Hate to let you know but America Ninja Warrior is popular viewing in SHIELD.” Quake’s eyes were bright as she grinned. And then she lightly hopped up grabbing the bar. 

Kyle could not wait to call his friends and fanboy about getting to work with Quake. She was legit awesome. “So you’re body control while maneuvering could use some work. We can definitely work on that. And upper body endurance. It’s not going to be the obstacles that are going to get you, it’s going to be spending too long on them and sapping your strength that is.” 

“I do rely on lower body strength more than these obstacles allow.” She nodded, sipping at her bottle of gatorade, sweat soaked fabric of her shirt sticking to her. 

He was so psyched that his celebratory wasn’t going to need help getting through. Also she wasn’t fighting his critiques, just politely considering his words. No whining either. “Other than that it’s going to be about making sure you’ve got as much experience with the obstacles as we can get you.” 

“I can put in two hours a day on this.” Quake frowned slightly. “I’d put in more but I’ve got commitments. And there’s going to be days where things happen and I’m going to miss training.” 

Kyle nodded, that made sense. “Well you know where my gym is.” He waved absently at the room they were in. 

“Fair, and I’ll have handled cardio and stretching before I get to the gym. So we can work on the technical work immediately.” Quake offered, which all of that helped, a lot. And based off the high level she was clearly functioning at building muscle wasn’t the issue. 

He handed her a towel. “If you come in and I’m not there, or you have added time, rock climbing is going to be the most helpful to you.”

“I can do that.” Quake held up her fist for a fist bump. “I think we’ve got this.” 

Kyle laughed as he bumped her fist. “They’re not going to know what hit them.” And he quite frankly meant it. 

////

Peter dropped down behind the guy trying to break into a car. “Do you need some help there buddy? I mean I think I've got to wait for you to actually succeed in part one of a crime before I can web you.” 

The car thief startled backwards with a high pitched yelp. He stared at Peter, one hand pressed to his chest. “Don’t do that man.” 

“I feel like that’s my line.” He replied. “I mean you, trying to break into a car, me here to prevent automotive theft.” 

The car thief’s eyes flicked to either way. “If I just run?”

“I’ll web you to the side of the building.” Peter shrugged. “I won’t call the cops, you’re not a very good car thief afterall.” 

The guy groaned but stepped to the side of the building and leaned against it. “Fine, put me in timeout.” 

Peter cocked his head. “You know if you need like financial planning help, or like food, shelter, that sort of thing you could go to one of the FEAST offices. They’ll help you get on your feet.” 

A siren wailed as it went flying past them. 

Peter shot his web upwards. “Be safe, don’t do crime!” He hollered as he went flying upwards.

The car thief startled. “No time out?” 

He snickered as he swung away, before focusing on the police vehicle he was now following. With great arching swings he picked up speed. A car chase! 

Peter whooped as he came sailing over the cop car, and then landed on the roof of the Cadillac that was trying to get away. His spider sense blared, he rolled to the side, barely missing the bullets being shot through the roof! “Hey! I’m up here!” 

He flipped over to the other side as more bullets came flying at where he’d just been. “Guess you knew I was there.” 

-”Would you just stop them and stop talking at them!”- Darcy’s voice came through the comm. -”I mean oh my Thor! I log in to check on you and what the fuck!?”-

Peter winced at the volume. He punched the window and webbed the two guns to the sides of the car. “Hey guys! Want to pull over?”

Peter chewed on his sandwich, his legs swinging over the edge of the building. He heard a light thud behind him. Swallowing he glanced behind him and grinned. “Daisy!” 

“Sup bro.” She loped easily across the roof before dropping down besides him. “So Darcy says you got shot at earlier?” 

His nose wrinkled. “They were not very good shots. You’re way scarier.” 

“Good.” She swayd bumping their shoulders together. “So, asked out the girl you’ve been mooning over yet?” 

He felt his cheeks flush, because no, no he hadn’t. Instead of answering he cleared his throat. “Want to go stop crime?” 

Daisy laughed at that. “Sure.” She tapped the temple of her mask. “Hear that Darcy, we need some convenient crime to go fight.” 

-”Fuck you, I was appritating Steve’s ass in his workout pants.”- Darcy let out a long sigh. -”If I wasn’t a good person I’d jump on that post break up, bisexuality crisis so fast. That shoulder to hip ratio….”-

He gagged slightly. 

Daisy rolled her eyes. “Darcy you’re crossing the line of playful inversion of sexist ogling into actual grossness.” 

-”Fair.”- There was a clicking on her end. -”Well there’s a fire alarm that just went off four blocks from you. Go save some people. I’ll keep an eye on you.”-

Daisy braced herself, the air beginning to vibrate around her. “Let’s go.” She launched herself through the air. 

Peter yanked his mask down over his mouth as he dove into the air, the familiar swooping sensation as he fell with purpose. 

He caught Daisy around the waist, her arm automatically wrapping around his shoulders to stabilize herself as he anchored them to the side of the building. They both looked at the old building, smoke pouring out of the fourth floor. 

Daisy’s voice was commanding as she spoke. “Evacuate the people, I’ll slow the fire to give you as much time as possible.” 

“You can’t control temperatures yet?” He stopped as he heard a cry for help.

“Fire extinguishers exist, let’s go.” She pushed off and then dropped straight down before arching straight through a window into the smoke. 

Peter felt a flicker of doubt, it was a ten story building. But then there wasn’t time for that. “Ok, just have to evacuate six stories of people. Easy peasy.” He shot a web at the wall and sent himself sailing for the fifth floor. 

-”Ok Spiderman, get the fifth and sixth floors evacuated, then go to the tenth and work down. Clear the fire escapes and make sure people can rescue themselves. And keep doors closed.”-

He went feet first through the window. His breath frosted as he breathed out. Huh, ok Daisy was getting the hang of causing molecules to still so much the temperature plummeted. “That’s not terrifying at all.” He mumbled before taking off to find people.

-”Oh don’t be a wuss. Also heat signature in the closet.”-

Peter opened the closet and crouched down. “Hey there.” He held out his hand. 

“SPIDERMAN!” The kid squealed and launched themselves at him. 

He caught the kid. “Just hang on, I’m gonna get you out of here kid.” 

////

Darcy grinned at Steve. “So, I have an ambitious plan and could use some assistance, Pranking Husband.” 

“I’m listening.” He dropped his arms to his hips. 

She felt positively giddy. “Tony just put in a ballet room for Natasha, she won’t be back for at least another day, so she’s never been in the room. So…” Darcy trailed off pointedly feeling smug. 

“She’ll assume anything wrong with the room is Tony.” Steve huffed in amusement. “More glitter?” 

Darcy patted his shoulder. “You’re thinking too small. Besides, glitter is my signature move. Now on the other hand laughing gas in the water, in the water fridge, just screams Tony doesn’t it?” 

“This is going to be a stupid question, but the water bottles in all the gyms are sealed?” Steve’s arms shifted, crossing over his chest. 

She rolled her eyes. “Duh, easy to get past. Your role if you accept is to ensure Sam is struck by the glitter curse. Our alliance must be in doubt. Also to save me if Natasha finds out it was us.” 

“Sam’s still recovering from the water balloon incident Quake and the Maximoffs enacted against him.” Steve’s eyes were bright and amused though. “But I’m game, what am I glittifying of his?” 

“Did you just use the word glittifying?” Darcy’s eyebrows rose as she stared at the man. 

He didn’t so much as twitch. “Your vocabulary is contagious.” 

“Good to know.” Darcy patted his shoulder again, cause honestly she might be a good enough person not to take advantage of the recently single super soldier hunk going through a quiet sexuality crisis but she wasn’t a saint. Also biceps...just biceps. “So since that’s business out of the way, how’s Barnse’s new arm treating him?” 

Darcy closed the hood of their portal car. “So Poprocks, there a reason you look twitterpated?” 

“I had a meeting with Hill. That woman is ice cold. My current theory is that she's a cyborg here to make me miserable.” Tony was working on the sensor relay board. “Why did I hire her again?”

She actually snorted at that. “So she’s exactly your type and if Pepper ever wises up and dumps you, you’ll get all heart eyes for Hill post ridiculous moping period. Good to know.” 

“I take offence at that!” Tony pulled back from his work. “I’ll have you know I prefer women with a bit more.” He made a rather blatant gesture over his chest. 

Darcy plucked a screwdriver and waved it at him. “Yes we all know how you and my mom ended up creating me. But dude big boobs are one of your prefered hook up types. But they’re not your type type.” She clucked her tongue at the outraged expression on his face. “Nuh uh. You get all dreamy over hyper competent women who don’t take your shit. Also who could totally peg you and make you beg for more. FRIDAY remind me to link an article on pegging to Pepper.” 

-”Of course Dr Lewis.”-

Tony gaped like a fish at her. A sort of wheezing sound came from him. 

Darcy almost pitied him, almost. “Poprocks, when it comes to women you are as easy to read as baby’s first book. By the way on a scale of one to ten, how embarrassing would you be if I hooked up with Willson? Cause man’s a snack and I’ve had two bed partners since I graduated. Two Poprocks.” 

Tony’s inarticulate side of the conversation, made a sound best described as a dolphin being asphyxiated. Possibly sexually. 

She leaned back, dropping one hand on her hip. “I’ll take that as a five point six on the humiliation scale. Cheers.” 

“You’re my sins made manifest, sent to haunt me.” He muttered while staring at her like she was some unfathomable creature from the depths of space. 

Daisy snorted, but traipsed up to him and smacked a kiss on his cheek. “So you going to open up the present Steve left you or do I have to keep wondering?” 

Tony’s face closed off slightly. “How do you know it’s from Steve?” 

“Uh it’s wrapped in parchment paper tied with honest to Thor twine. Unless Pepper took up homecrafts it’s Steve.” She picked up the thin but large package in his lap. “Come on, open it. I need to know whether I’m ratting out my pranking partner to a certain individual for his crimes or not.” 

Tony looked at her and groaned, clearly accepting it was a battle he was going to lose. “Fine, but I better be who you’re ratting him out to.” 

Darcy just grinned triumphantly and watched as Tony purposely took as long as possible to open the thing. She rolled her eyes. He sucked in a startled breath as the paper fell away. 

She swallowed. “Oh. That’s...a pretty good olive branch.” 

“Maybe.” Tony allowed, his eyes riveted to the image. 

It was a lovingly hand drawn picture in a simple silver frame. The subject matter was...sweet. It depicted Darcy, Daisy and Peter. It must be from an image Steve had wheedled out of FRIDAY. It showed all three of them in Darcy’s apartment. Daisy and Darcy were clearly involved in a playful argument. If memory served it had been about the best Star Wars movies. But Peter was very visibly sneaking up behind them with ice water. His face was mischievous and completely focused on not spilling anything or making any noise. Steve had to have spent hours carefully depicting them for Tony. Because Steve would know Tony would never think to set aside photos or even think of such a thing. It was...really nice. 

Darcy squeezed Tony’s shoulder. “We’ll have to get him to do one with all four of us sometime. Maybe something from the Thanksgiving pre-dinner brawl.” 

“Yeah, maybe we should.” Tony’s voice was suspiciously thick.


	34. Peter and Pietro's Alarming Days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright guys I have some news you're not going to like. I'm dropping this from two updates a week to one. I can't work 40+ hours a week and keep up with the update schedule so I'm preemptively doing this to avoid a hiatus or something later on. I'm deep in the third act of this thing in the drafts and I need to finish the thing before you guys catch up or else there's going to be internal inconsistencies. Because right now I can go back ten chapters and adjust things if they weren't working or needed to be changed for stuff to make sense later on. But chasing eight year olds around is exhausting and some nights I'm just not getting the two to three pages written I need to.
> 
> So UPDATES every Sunday. If things change, or when I finish drafting the fic I'll go back to the Sun/Wed schedule.

Peter felt his spider sense blair, every muscle in his body stilled in absolute terror. His eyes widened, he even stopped breathing. Maybe he could fling himself from the window without anyone noticing him?

“I could have sworn I just heard you have diarrhea of the mouth.” Darcy’s tone had a terrifying calmness to it. 

The mechanic slapped his hand on the hood of Aunt May’s honda. “Just calling it like it is sweet cheeks.” 

Peter edged away from Darcy. Should he restrain her if she tried to strangle the man with her bare hands? He was tempted to leave the idiot to his fate. 

Darcy’s hand with her transforming taser bangle twitched. “Ten minutes under the hood. If the car’s running again after that you will refund Mrs Parker and record a video of you saying ‘I am a sexist and incompetent asshole’. If I can’t fix it then I’ll pay you double what you’re asking for. Deal? Or are you a coward as well as a sexist and incompetent asshole?” Her smile showed far too many teeth. 

Peter’s smile felt plastic as he handed the car keys to Aunt May. “So Darcy and I picked up the car for you from the shop.” 

“Hold up young man.” Aunt May looked at him. She gave an exhausted sigh. “Is the mechanic shop at least still standing?” 

He winced, but kept his smile as much as possible. “Shop is still shoppy.” 

“And your sister didn’t come in with you why?” Aunt May reached for her purse. “Do we need to bail her out of jail?” 

Peter shuffled. “No? It was kinda close. But uh no. Darcy’s just fixing the car in the garage. She uh...I don’t think you can go back to that mechanic.” 

“Well before you go up to your room please remind your sister that my car does not need to have jet propulsion. Or guns in the headlamps, I don’t care how cool it looked in that movie.” Aunt May set her purse back down.

Peter slumped, oh she thank Thor, she wasn’t mad. And technically none of Darcy’s muttered ideas for upgrades to the car were what Aunt May had just said. He had plausible deniability. “Sure Aunt May. Also Darcy got you a full refund. Bye!” He didn’t wait for more questions, Darcy could fall on that sword thank you very much. 

He zipped back into the garage. “No guns in the head lamps and no jet propulsion! Also you suck for making me do that!” Peter narrowly avoided a flying wrench as he flipped over the car and out the side door. 

Peter pulled his mask over his face before dropping down next to Daisy, who was using her powers to keep two drunk idiots from being able to get at each other. 

She looked over at him. “Sup, I’m not sure they even know I’m here.”

“Should I web them?” He raised a brow as he recognized the slurred profanity they were yelling at each other. “Possibly their mouths?” 

“No, one of them is def going to puke soon and murder by forced drowning in puke is not...let’s not do that.” Daisy cringed in disgust. “I already called the cops. These two morons will be spending the night in jail. And I stopped feeling bad about it two minutes ago.” 

His nose wrinkled as he got a whiff of alcohol. “So...do you need help?” 

“Really?” She dropped a hand on her hip and stared at him in disbelief. Which fair, the idea that either of his sisters couldn’t handle two drunk civilians was ridiculous. Especially Daisy. 

Peter’s cheeks heated, he was glad his mask hid it. “Right...uh...should I just go?” 

“Nope, we’re helping Yuri after this.” Daisy’s lips twitched up. 

He beamed. “I get to help!” 

“Yeah, partners right?” She punched his shoulder. 

Peter bounced, he was finally getting brought in on the good stuff! His spider sense was the only reason he managed to dodge the puke from drunk asshole number two. “Oh Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew.” 

“Ready to stop trying to punch each other?” Daisy asked, her voice bored and mostly uninterested in their replies. 

Peter cocked his head to the side. Huh, either drunk one had slept with the other’s mother. Or at some point in their argument he’d claimed he’d slept with the man’s mother….and no, they weren’t interested in stopping their ‘fight’. If swinging at the air Daisy was quaking so they couldn’t get at each other counted as a fight. He looked at his sister. “Do you think they’ll get tired?” 

Peter stared at Darcy. He had been about to go to bed, but now he had a sister sitting on the foot of his bed with a glint in her eye. Sleep would have to wait. “What?”

“So Daisy obviously needs to learn to swim. And she punched cthulhu. So we could use some...humanizing and making sure people don’t start to put together how actually terrifying she is.” Darcy explained. “So, think your Spiderchannel could use some learning to swim videos?” 

“How do we do that in costume?” He couldn’t help but ask. But yeah, that could be pretty hilarious. He was interested. 

Darcy grinned. “Well we just have to slap Daisy’s mask on her and stick her in a wet suit. I’m sure we can get a Spiderman themed wetsuit for you and your mask is already waterproof.” 

“Uh….I thought we instituted a rule to only use Daisy's illegal hacking money on necessities?” Peter was still adjusting to not having to worry about bills. Not that Aunt May ever really had shared how things were. But he wasn’t stupid. And the constant bickering every time Aunt May found money Daisy had funneled into her account was hilarious. But he refused to let himself just depend on his sisters for everything. 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Kid, our dad is a billionaire. And that last prototype of mine sold for sixteen million. I can spring for some wetsuits.” She reached out and ruffled his hair. “Besides, you spent your birthday in a hospital bed due to were-wolf attack.” 

“You got me a science nerd emergency kit for my birthday? You don’t owe me anything?” He stared at her in confusion. It was a cool kit, it was basically all the high calorie snacks he could want, specialty fidget spinners, and a watch programmed to make him take breaks. Legit, it was almost as cool as the leather jacket Daisy had gotten him. 

She snorted. “Kid we didn’t do anything cool for your birthday, I’m giving you the opportunity to try and drown our sister on camera. Party, or filmed victory over our sister?” 

“Swimming sounds awesome.” He grinned, he never won anything against Daisy. 

Darcy beamed. “Excellent, I’ll tell Wanda to drag her to the pool next week.” 

“Cause Daisy won’t question it if Wanda asks?” He double checked. It was always good to double check Darcy’s plots. 

She laughed. “Exactly. Our sister is a sappy idiot. Now, tell me everything about any progress with Gwen.” 

“Urgh.” He groaned, his cheeks heating as he buried his face in his hands. “She said I looked like a puppy.” 

Darcy patted him on the back, her snickering was almost not obnoxious. 

////

Pietro zipped into the lab. He moonwalked backwards the last stretch to Darcy’s desk. “What up?” 

Darcy looked up, magnifying goggles giving her a slightly bug eyed look. “You are spending way too much time with my sister.” 

He shrugged, it was fair, but copying Daisy’s slang when speaking to Darcy was amusing. “Who would help me limber up if I didn’t spend time with your sister?” 

“I should tell Wanda you said that.” Darcy slid her goggles up onto the top of her head, while closing the side of one of her portal traveling robots.

He was mostly sure it was Sheep-EE 36, but he could be wrong. Pietro crossed his arms. “Wanda knows I only tease.” 

“I doubt that will go very far when it comes to innuendo involving her girl.” Darcy smirked. “If you help me with this trial run I’ll keep my silence though.” 

He laughed but nodded. “Of course, I came with news though.” 

“Really? Share with the class speedy.” Darcy picked up and dropped her robot into his arms. 

Pietro preened. “I was accepted into the training program for firefighters.” 

“Huh…” Darcy looked at him. “That suits you I think.” 

“Of course it does. Dashing hero by day and night.” He flicked his hair dramatically with a smug grin. 

She patted his shoulder while directing him to the testing room. The foot thick glass separating the testing room from the lab at large was only slightly concerning. “Good for you.” 

“It will be nice to have something to do.” He agreed slightly more seriously. Frowning he noticed it really was just them in the lab. “Where is Jane, Ian and the one who never wears pants?” 

Darcy huffed. “Field trip to Antarctica for aurora readings. I needed time to rebuild some of the interdimensional drones, so I stayed around.” 

“And without you, Pepper and Hill here the world would probably end?” Pietro was only slightly joking. 

Darcy turned on the control table for the portal generator. “Exactly. Now go put Sheep-EE 36 into the portal generator and let’s get some new readings, sweet cheeks.” 

“Where are you sending this one?” Pietro asked curiously as he gently set the robot exactly where it ought to go. He didn’t want to know what Darcy would do to him if he damaged it. She got weird about her creations. It wasn’t his fault he tripped over her attack roomba. Really. 

Darcy flipped the switches turning everything on. “Since Jane isn’t here, it's a message for my bro Thor. I believe he’ll get the idea.” 

Pietro paused, he’d listened to Darcy complain about what a shitty boyfriend but excellent hugger Thor was. She’d actually composed an ode about it last week. “What is the message?” 

“Hopefully you’ll see when the idiot brings it back via rainbow road. But we’re sending it straight into what I believe are his private quarters on Asgard. It’s difficult to get an exact lock. But Sheep-EE 23 definitely ended up in the imperial palace on Asgard.” Darcy looked up from the control panel. “What are you still doing in there? Get out before it-”

And then the world exploded into light. 

His stomach was in his throat, the light practically burned as a sick swooping sensation knocked the air out of him. He wasn’t sure if it was seconds or minutes of confounding disorientation, and then his feet slammed onto solid ground. 

Pietro’s hands grabbed his knees as he wheezed, willing his stomach not to rebel. He winced and looked up as his stomach settled slightly. 

This was not Thor’s bedroom…..it was almost definitely Asgard. The hundreds of fancy looking people in robes, massive golden stairs and throne with a dude with one eye kinda gave it away. It was...not how he’d pictured meeting an Asgardian properly. 

Sheep-EE 36 exploded into a giant pink cloud of pink smoke and glitter and started blaring what sounded like a mash up of something definitly sexual by Lady Gaga and something that involved a lot of the phase ‘Fuck You’. 

Pietro plastered on his most plastic smile and raised a hand. “Sup.” His sister was going to kill him if the aliens didn’t first.

////

Darcy stared at the very empty testing room. “Shit nuggets.” 

This was bad...very bad.

She grabbed her cell phone and dialed Jane. As soon as the ringing stopped the connection clicked open she started talking. “Janey I may have kinda just portaled Pietro into Thor’s bed chambers.” 

There was a long silence. Finally Jane’s very groggy voice came through. -“You created an artificial Einstein Rosen Bridge that is still 40% theoretically functional and used it on a human being?”-

“Technically I created an artificial Einstein Rosen Bridge that is still 40% theoretically functional and used it on Sheep-EE 36 and Pietro was maybe accidentally in the testing room.” Darcy cringed, oh this was so bad. He was probably alive. Please Thor let him be alive. She refused to do the math. The asshole was alive. 

Jane was definitely pinching the bridge of her nose. -”You’re going to need Daisy. We don’t have a way of holding a bridge open long enough to grab a person and drag them back. If she can keep the black hole open he should have time to come back through.”-

”Right… I’ll upload the new data.” Darcy started bringing up everything from her test and updating their private online server with it. “I’ll go collect Daisy while you look at it. How do you feel about skype?” 

-”I’m obviously skyping to make sure you don’t portal yourself and half the tower to Asgard as well. Or swallow the planet in an uncontrolled black hole.”- Jane grumbled as there was a distinct sound of keys clicking. 

Darcy ignored the snark and jogged out of the lab for the elevator. “FRIDAY, be a pal and please say Daisy is not currently in the Maximoff’s apartment?” 

-”I’m afraid I cannot do that Dr Lewis.”-

Darcy winced as she hit the correct floor’s buttons in the elevator. “Wonderful.” She was gonna get magically shischkebobbed. 

Accepting her fate Darcy knocked heavily on the door. It wasn’t like they really had time for her to waste feeling bad about how much she’d fucked up anyways. She opened the door, no point waiting for someone to open it when she had access. Darcy couldn’t help it, she raised her brow as she stared at Daisy and Wanda. “You are so weird.” 

“Darcy?” Daisy hopped over the side of the couch where they’d been playing battleship. 

She shook her head briefly, now was not the time. “I need your help to hold a wormhole stable so we can drag Pietro back from Asgard.” 

“Pietro’s where?” Wanda’s eyes blazed red in alarm. 

Darcy held up her hands. “Asgard, probably Thor’s bedroom. I can’t make a portal last longer than four seconds which is fine for robot drops but not for a person who could be trying to flirt with hot alien ladies.” She turned to Daisy. “I need you to brute force it and keep it open long enough for him to get back through.” 

“Of course.” Daisy’s face settled into her agent face. “I’ve forced portals open before. Do you have anything to get me up to speed on the resonance first?” 

Darcy considered that. “If we dump another Sheep-EE through would that give you enough time to get a feel for it?” 

“I’ll make it work.” Daisy yanked the door open. “How long has he been missing?” 

“Ten minutes.” Darcy led them towards the elevator. “Jane’s going over the specs I used. But the location was definitely Asgard.” 

Wanda’s voice was tightly controlled, but there was the faintest waver to it. “Is Pietro safe?” 

“I haven’t lost a Sheep-EE to portal related issues since 13.” Darcy slapped the button for the lab floor. “He’s enhanced and the destination was a habitable planet with friendly aliens. Odds are def in his favor. But he’s spending the next forty hours under medical supervision as soon as we get him back.” 

Daisy gave her a short nod of acknowledgement. “Safest portal incident I’ve heard of.” She reached out touching Wanda’s arm lightly. 

Wanda didn’t say anything, and no one said anything about the wisps of red circling her. Which was honestly less murdery than Darcy had been expecting. Now to get the obnoxious twin back.

Darcy spoke carefully into the microphone. “Pietro, go into the next shiney portal. We’re going to hold it open for thirty seconds. Get your speedy ass back through.” She hit the stop recording option. Loading up the recording to blast from the Sheep-EE they were about to send through she bit at her lip. He couldn’t have gotten that far from the initial portal…..

“Not to judge, or step on the science toes. But what if he’s not in Thor’s bedroom anymore?” Daisy asked from where she was pulling on one of the testing suits. 

Darcy shrugged. “Well if he doesn’t come back Sheep-EE is going to make air siren noises till we retrieve it. And somebody will notice that and shove Road Runner back through if they have half a brain cell.” She tilted her head to the side. “Or smash it with magical hammer after dumping him through the bifrost.” 

“Why haven’t they just sent him back if they can?” Wanda asked while zipping up the back of Daisy’s testing suit. The testing suit they hadn’t been planning on using for months, but well they couldn’t just have Daisy in jeans. If something went wrong they were going to need all the data possible. 

Darcy carefully set a Sheep-EE in the testing room and backed out. “You never spent a lot of time with Thor did you?” She shook her head with a snort. “I’m fully expecting your brother to be sloshed on alien mead and to have taken his swing at Lady Sif already when we get him.”

“You know, respect. Lady Sif is a badass.” Daisy commented while snapping on the science goggles. She yelped as red energy swirled around her arm. “Babe! Really?” 

Wanda shot them both a glare. “Can we not joke till I have him back?” 

“Fair, sorry.” Darcy accepted, she purposely turned to give the two of them a private second. She flipped the switches and then glanced over her shoulder at her sister. “Time’s up, you ready?” 

“I got this.” Daisy stepped into the testing room, but clearly outside of the portal generator. She sat down cross legged and held her hands palm outwards. Honestly she looked like she was trying some weird futuristic meditation scam. 

Darcy took a deep breath. And hit the button. 

////

Wanda stayed perfectly still, her powers wrapped protectively around Daisy. If things looked bad she was yanking her girlfriend out of there. They were not portalling her brother and her girlfriend to an alien planet. This was going to give her new and horrifying nightmares. But Daisy’s calm confidence was keeping her grounded. Darcy’s manic feeling panic was not. Which left her staying out of the way while picking at the cuff of her jacket. 

The machine clicked on, the weirdly familier flash of light filling the labs. And then it was like the very air slammed downwards, Daisy’s entire body going rigid. There was a blueish blur that came bursting out of the portal and then it snapped shut, Daisy wheezing as she half keeled over. 

Wanda’s first move was her brother who’d just run straight into a wall. She grabbed her brother and let out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding as he grinned dopily at her. She just crushed him into a tight hug. “You idiot.” She hissed. 

“I’m fine...uh that wasn’t Thor’s bedroom by the way.” Pietro hugged her back. His familiar warmth and presence easily slotting back exactly how it should be. 

Darcy punched his shoulder. “Why did you linger in the testing room? I mean I was stupid and didn’t check you were out, but dude!” 

“You were right that Asguardians are hot though. 10/10.” He grinned at Darcy. 

Wanda slipped out of his arms with a final squeeze. She left him and Darcy to snipe about alien hotness and lab protocols. She dropped to one knee in front of Daisy. “Are you alright?” 

“Yeah, that was disturbingly easier than last time.” Daisy’s voice was slightly breathy, but she wasn’t radiating any pain. More sort of dazed jitteriness. “Pietro ok?” 

Wanda leaned forward and kissed her solidly. She sighed as she pulled back. “Thank you.” 

“Totes.” There was a smile to Daisy’s voice as she lightly brushed their noses against each other. 

She pressed a last light kiss to Daisy’s lips before floating back to her feet. Without waiting to see Daisy try to be tough, she easily hooked under Daisy’s arm and hauled her girlfriend to her feet.

“Are you two always this sickenly sweet?” Darcy asked, her voice slightly exasperated. 

Wanda felt her cheeks heat slightly. 

Daisy rolled her eyes before replying. “Well we were having a board game date night before you went mad scientist. So your suffering is irrelevant.” 

“Well game night is still on hold. We have to go put Road Runner here through medical supervision.” Darcy tossed Daisy her bundle of clothing. “And you need out of the space suit. I’m impressed at how well you’re pulling it off cause it’s hideous. But off.” 

Wanda glanced between her brother and her girlfriend. “All four of us are going to be in the medical labs for a long time aren’t we?”


	35. Amira Ahmed, Professional Kidnapping Target

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup! Not sure if I've mentioned this but I needed a non-white reporter for this fic. And I did some google deep dive into reporters in the Marvel cannon. And like...it was kinda depressing. But anyways and then I stumbled on the reporter from the first Ironman movie who is reporting on the refugees on the tv for like twenty seconds. And joy of all joys, sh has a full name and isn't white or like one of the two black reporters in the thing. (I was being stubborn about it). So that's who Amira Ahmed is, she's the reporter who got seconds of screen time in Ironman 1. I had to make the tag for her.

Amira Ahmed hit her emergency beacon as she was hauled into a dark alley. One day back in New York and grabbed. At least it was better than Michigan..hopefully. If this was another government group she was going to scream. She blinked at the ski masked goons. “I’m a reporter.”

“We know, you’re the reporter who's been interviewing those freaks.” One of the goons hauled her into a van. 

Amira’s teeth clenched as her hands were tied behind her back. Other than some poisonous looks she didn’t try to fight. “Whatever you think this is going to do, it’s not going to work.” 

“Oh I think it will.” The guy who’d spoken before pulled off his ski mask. He was..horribly bland looking. Average looking macho white dude. His face twisted with a sneer as he squatted down in front of her. “You’re going to tell us how to find all those freaks you’ve been talking to.” 

Her eyes narrowed as she looked at him in disgust. “I’ve met a hundred small minded men like you. Who see anything different as a threat. Who hurt and cause harm as easy as breathing, who’ve never faced a real consequence. And you don’t scare me.” She let out a grunt as he slapped her across the face. 

He clucked his tongue. “These enhanced freaks aren’t like some poor put upon minority. They are walking weapons. Hell, they’re not even human.” There wasn’t a flicker of doubt in him. 

Amira knew in her head that rescue was coming. But something cold and resolved settled in her chest anyways. Even if rescue never came she’d die before giving up a single one of her sources. “You kidnapped the wrong person if you think I’d ever cooperate with you. If I didn’t give over my sources to the government why would I give them up to a thug like you?” 

“We can be very persuasive.” He swayed with the movement of the van. “In the meantime you should consider your loyalties. Those monsters, or humans.” 

There was the faintest but still steady vibration. Amira smiled, showing her teeth. “You kidnapped the wrong person.” Those vibrations were definitely coming from the road not the van. And she only knew one person who caused vibrations. 

“You’re the one making people sympathize with the freaks. Even if you tell us nothing we still did the right thing grabbing you.” He spat. “It’s people like you who don’t realize how dangerous they are that are going to get our race killed.” 

Amira glared at him. The fact the van hadn’t been sent flying yet meant Quake and probably Spiderman were waiting for an opening. Keeping as many of the idiots in the van focused on her as possible was for the best then. So she sucked it up and kept talking. “You’re making a good case that us regular humans are plenty dangerous.” 

“But I can’t kill a city block with my mind. Did you miss the part where Quake blew that kraken’s brains out with a single punch? What if she decides to punch a building? She could probably make an earthquake that would swallow the city.” 

She tipped her chin up. “She wouldn’t do that. And even if she did SHIELD or the Avengers, or some idealistic idiot in spandex would stop her. You think what she handles for SHIELD is us regular folks? She’s their option for handling enhanced who commit crimes. This isn’t the Dark Ages. There’s too many enhanced, with different moral codes for some idiot with powers to try and conquer or enslave the planet. The others would stop them.” 

“That won’t keep the regular people crushed under their fights alive.” He made a sharp arm gesture outwards. 

Amira had learned several things, and honestly the one likely to have the largest impact on enhanced rights had nothing to do with their humanity or the horrific dangers presented towards them. “And who do you think is going to save the planet if they’re not here? Because we’re not enslaved by alien outsiders because of the enhanced on this planet protecting every last one of us. Even you assholes.” 

“We’ll figure it out. ‘Sides, from what I’ve seen bullets work just as well on aliens as they do on enhanced and humans alike.” He had a smug look on his face. “But sounds to me like someone isn’t too objective. Really, reporting when you clearly have a side you agree with.” 

Amira actually had to blink in bafflement at that. “You think I didn’t have personal feelings when I reported on the US using drones to kill innocent people as well as the guilty? Or when I reported on the horrors the Ten Rings inflict? Or the sex trafficking routes I uncovered? I am obliged to report the truth, not be an opinionless robot.” 

The goon’s face twisted up in a wordless furry. And then the van slammed straight into something with a resounding boom. Everyone was slammed forward, metal screaming in protest at the sudden ceasing of movement. 

The glass windows shattered. And then there was a blur of red and blue as goons started getting webbed all throughout the van. There was the sound of metal twisting, the van vibrating almost violently. And then it was ripped open, and strong arms grabbed Amira and hauled her out and back into daylight. 

“I got you.” Quake’s voice assured her, her arms strong but not painful. 

Amira relaxed, she was going to be ok. She laughed breathlessly as she spotted Spiderman hopping out of the van, the kidnappers groaning from inside where they were attached to the sides with webbing. “So this one not about to turn into a cross city shootout?” 

“Well I’ve got back up within five miles, and we did a circuit of the block. No snipers or back up for them. So I think we’re good.” Quake laughed good naturedly as she let Amira go. One hand staying on her arm, steadying her. “You good?” 

Amira nodded. “I’m good.” She reached up touching her face where she’d been back handed. “I could use an ice pack and some aspirin though.” 

“Do you need some self defence classes?” Quake’s head tipped to one side ever so slightly. “Cause I can hook you up with a theoretically legal taser and some classes if you need them.” 

With an amused huff she patted Quake. “Thank you.” She considered the woman. “I could use a beer and Stark’s number, for my next article.” 

“I think we can do that. You have plans for post police interviews? Cause this evening works for me.” Quake raised a hand high fiving Spiderman as he jumped over to them. 

Amira eyed the street around them. This was going to cause such terrible traffic. “Sounds like a plan.” 

“Oh are you coming back with us?” Spiderman bounced slightly. “Also good to see you again Ms Ahmed.” 

And the crazy thing was, she was sure he meant it. 

Amira sighed as she sipped at her beer. “I’m a terrible muslim but I’m making an exception for kidnapping.” 

“No judgement.” Quake passed a rootbeer to Spiderman. “The stuff you’ve found on the ATCU is impressive.” 

Spiderman nodded while sticking a bendy straw in his soda. “Yeah, you’ve been really dragging those asshats.” 

“The facts are the facts.” She looked up at two heros. “Would it be alright if I asked you some questions? I don’t even know what I’d do with them. It’s not like I’m working on something but I’m curious, and I’ll probably be able to use it.” 

Quake and Spiderman glanced at each other before Quake turned back towards her. “Sure.” 

Amira set her phone on the kitchen and clicked on the recorder app. “If you were asked to stop each other would you?” 

“Huh.” Quake fell silent looking thoughtful. 

Spiderman twitched with outrage. “No. That would be... never I’d never do that.” 

“Don’t say never.” Quake’s voice was quiet. She looked up at Spiderman. “I agree if someone told me to, or tried to order me to take you in, they could fuck off.” And her tone was dangerous as she said that. “But…” 

“But what?” Spiderman was so clearly frowning under his mask. “You’re-” He cut himself off from saying what Amira was about 90% sure would have been ‘my sister’. Still he made a frustrated noise. “We’re partners!” 

Quake shook her head. “This life, what we do changes people. Lines start blurring and you get people falling further off the edge then that Punisher guy.” She held up a hand preventing him from interrupting her. “And that’s just what we can control. I’ve seen people controlled and turned into sick puppets of who they were as people by others. Hive was…” The woman’s eyes flicked the phone. “I don’t know the future. But if I ever became a threat, a real threat I’d want to be stopped. And it should never be you, things would have gone so completely wrong if it ever came down to you. But I’d want to be stopped.”

Amira’s apartment was dead silent at that. Her breath stuck in the back of her throat. And then Spiderman yanked Quake into a tight hug. 

“That’s never going to happen.” Spiderman’s voice was tight. “Never.” 

Quake seemed to accept anything she said would be denied. So she hugged him back. “Ok.” Her voice had a hoarse quality to it. 

Amira turned off the recording app. She hadn’t meant for them to go that...well dark. But she knew what she was going to do with it. Because it was quietly powerful. She could ask her other questions later. 

////

Daisy used her core strength to keep herself steady as she carefully swung herself between the bars. Twisting she hooked her feet onto the next one and then hung upside down letting her arms rest. “So any improvement?” 

“Yeah you’re getting the hang of the flying.” Kyle huffed in amusement from where he was sitting on one of the weight machines down below. “Your body control is nearly top notch. Your grip strength is probably what we want to work on most. I take back my first impressions. Well that and more practice on the obstacles.” 

Daisy nodded, this obstacle stuff was fun. “Sounds doable. By the by, I’m not gonna be around tomorrow. Spiderman has plans he’s not sharing.” 

“Big romantic date then?” His voice turned teasing. “Do I get deets on Superhero romance?” 

She actually snorted. “We’re not dating. Spiderman and I are partners and inside scoop, nothing romantic is ever gonna happen.” 

“Oh wow you’re in some deep denial there.” Kyle leaned back staring at her in disbelief. 

Dropping down she caught herself with some light vibrations. “Why is that everyone assumes I’m in denial or lying?” 

“Cause you’ve got a hickey and I don’t know about you but I don’t hold people’s hands I’m not fucking?” Kyle hopped to his feet and tossed her a bottle of water. 

She rolled her eyes. “Oh please that’s a lie. And I never said I was single, just not with Spiderman. Although my girlfriend does find the whole thing kind of hilarious.” 

“Girlfriend?” Kyle paused. 

Daisy raised her eyebrow. “Do I need to explain that to you in more detail?” 

“Nah, but huh. That puts things in a different context. Poor Spiderman, that’s one hopeless crush then.” 

She barely resisted rolling her eyes again. “Oh he’s got a hopeless crush, but not on me. Do you know how much ice cream I’ve eaten due to moping over the last couple of weeks?” 

“Can’t he just flash some super powers? I’d think the Superhero thing made dating easier?” Kyle looked generally confused. 

Which… “If you’re an asshole.” 

“Wait, does your girlfriend not know you’re Quake?” He looked genuinely and painfully confused and concerned. 

Daisy laughed at that. “She knows, but let’s say we’re not the norm. I mean take a second and think about it. If you were keeping a secret identity, and mine is more of an open secret then anything, but a real secret identity like Daredevil, Spiderman, those guys. Like think, really think about the issue dating would bring to that.” 

Kyle blinked, and then his brow furrowed as he frowned. He opened and then closed his mouth. His face twisted into horror. “Oh man that would suck. But..oh shit.” 

“Exactly.” Daisy patted his shoulder. “So what’s your idea for grip strength training” Her pat turned into a grip. “And I like you Kyle, but I won’t be happy if this conversation ends up on the web.” 

“Duh, of course.” His voice squeaked slightly. 

She smirked. “So more rock climbing in my future?” 

////

Darcy hummed as she waltzed into Steve’s apartment. “What up Capsical!” 

“Do I even want to know how you got in without the key?” Steve looked up from where he was doing something in the kitchen...probably boiling something that shouldn’t be boiled. 

Darcy smirked. “I sweet talked FRIDAY. But what about you? Like what are you boiling and why? I thought you agreed boiling was bad?” 

“I’m still working on modern cooking.” He grabbed a towel, drying his hands. “What brings you here besides judging my skills in the kitchen?” 

She raised an eyebrow. “Skills? No. I see why you’re single.” Stepping forward with a shake of her head she tossed a usb to him. “I bringth the legal team's advice for how to act during the trial.” 

“Thank you, really. For everything.” Steve held it carefully. 

She shrugged. “Didn’t do it for you.” Her head tilted. “I do have a question though. How have you not said something awful? Like you’re blandly modern. I mean at the least I’d expect you to use some problematic terms.” 

“SHIELD had a class on changes in jargon and what wasn’t ok to say that used to be.” Steve shrugged and then scratched at the back of his head. “And I don’t get why everyone expects me to be racist or sexist or something.” 

Darcy hummed while swinging open his fridge and poking around till she nabbed a classic glass bottle of coke. “Expand my dude, I’m curious.” 

He gave an amused huff and leaned against the counter. “I grew up in Brooklyn, 1930’s Brooklyn. It was an immigrant and social outcast type of place back then. And my Ma raised me by herself after the Great War. Kind of hard to look down on women when you were raised by one of the smartest, toughest and hardest working ladies around. Then in the war I insisted on the best people for my unit. We were one of the first interacial ones out there. People give too much slack to my generation for thinking awful things. They knew that stuff was junk back then and they know it now.” 

“That is...not what I was expecting.” Darcy considered him. “What about sex?” 

Steve’s cheeks pinked slightly. “Well it’s not exactly proper, but if you think my generation didn’t have sex, especially with the war and everyone living like it was their last days, they didn’t teach history right.” 

Darcy couldn’t help the laugh as she opened the coke bottle. “Yeah I can see that. What about you, you get any war time nookie?” 

He spluttered, his blush turning his ears red. “I was gone on Peggy almost as soon as I joined the army and before that it wasn’t like girls looked at me.” 

“Well that makes sense then, you’re just a prude as a person. Captain uptight. But it’s cool, kinda sweet actually. You’ll make Barnes a very happy man in like however long your angst over being queer takes you to process.” She sipped her coke while looking at him challengingly. 

Steve’s shoulders slumped ever so slightly. “Are you ever going to give that up?” 

“No, cause if I do you’ll happily box it up and stick it in a corner and be miserable.” She hopped up on the counter. “And while I might not be doing all this trial stuff for Bucky, for either of you really, doesn’t mean I want you to be miserable.” 

Steve sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You’re a good person, a bit crazy though.” His lips twitched. “But stop. Please.” 

Darcy’s eyes narrowed as she looked at the man. There was a certain resignation to him, an exhaustion. Maybe it was less repressed queerness and more something else? Either way she wasn’t an asshole. “Fine, but in exchange for this boon, I get to make final call on what you’re wearing to court.” 

“You can have final call on my court outfits.” Steve relaxed. “Thank you.” 

She smiled at him, he was a bit of a shit but she liked the good Captain. “I got you. And fear not, we’ll fix your hair so it’s all nice, natural and respectable for the trial. But once Barnes is free your hair is no longer safe.” 

“I’ll live in fear of what color you turn it next.” Steve glanced at his pot of boiling...something. “Do you have a take out recommendation because that does not smell good?” 

Darcy considered that, she could do with some greek. And being rich meant take out without worrying about the bill. Small perks, even if she was giving away 98% of her net wealth. “How do you feel about Greek? Cause I could eat.” 

“You’re welcome to stay for dinner.” Steve pulled out his phone and went straight to a food app. He was surprisingly good at the tech thing. 

////

Tony paused as he read the last lab report. “Pep...my kid portaled Quicksilver to Asgard and back.”

“They got the bridge running?” She asked as if that wasn’t terrifying from where she was skimming through her own reports. 

He swallowed, was this what other people felt when they saw his inventions? Because if it was it explained a lot of the hate. “No. Accidental portaling. He was in the testing room and she didn’t double check. So she portaled him to the throne room of Asgard. And then got him back by using her sister to manipulate the artificial wormhole, to keep it open long enough for him to get back through.”

“I didn’t know Daisy could manipulate wormholes or blackholes or whatever world ending space science is happening in astro lab.” Pepper actually looked up. “You know on a power scale Peter has more abilities and if Daisy wasn’t a former agent I’d say he’d beat her in a fight. But then she goes and does things like that.” 

He felt kind of weak as his brain automatically did the math on what that meant for the sheer versatility of Daisy’s powers. “My kids are terrifying.” 

“I don’t know how this is surprising.” Pepper winced slightly. “Also your daughter is using her guilt over the portaling to bug Hill.” 

Tony took a wonderful moment to imagine what Maria Hill dealing with Darcy would be like. “I want pictures.” 

“Tony!” Pepper glared. “Call your daughter and convince her to either go back to PR, legal, or the labs.” 

“But Pep, just think of what she’ll do!” Tony had images of Hill marshaled onto blind dates and glitter taking over her office. It was fantastic. 

Pepper just stared at him dubiously. “I don’t think I want to know what you’re imagining but it’s not what’s happening. Maria wants to keep her.” 

Tony stilled, that was a terrifying thought. “I’ll call Darcy.” 

“And Peter, you were going to look at the specs on his drone.” Pepper gently reminded him. 

He nodded while climbing to his feet, he had calls to make. Half way out the door he paused. “Pep, I think I’m gonna stay here till the trial is over.” 

Her face softened. “Well we did need to have a negotiation with SHIELD. I’m sure Director Mace will be thrilled to have you personally attending.” 

“That’s…” Tony winced..he was very sure that was not the case. And he very much did not want to deal with SHIELD. However it was a good public cover to avoid anyone asking him why he was avoiding the trial. “Fine, but I’m not waking up before noon.”


	36. Dog Paddling Past Suspicions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I worship upon the alter of tea. For tea is good. The hoard of unruly children I preside over cannot defeat the beacon of calmness holding a mug of tea. Also their little noses scrunch up every time I remind them it's tea not hot coco and it's hilarious. But the power of keeping a blank face and sipping your tea instead of responding to a stupid question is immense. You can see the prepared whining fight fade from their eyes. And there are stupid questions. For instance if you just chucked a fist full of rocks at another child and I tell you to go sit down for five minutes, you know why I said that. An arched eyebrow of 'really' with a sip of tea leads to sulky acceptance of time out.

Wanda sat beside her brother, their elbows lightly touching, as they watched the...chaos that was Peter and Darcy trying to teach Daisy to swim. “If they stopped trying to drown each other it would go much faster.” 

“I think that’s the point.” Pietro replied dryly. “Why are we here?” 

“Because Darcy and Peter wanted to feel clever and had me bring Daisy.” Wanda couldn’t help smiling as she felt the delighted energy coming from the siblings. “And once they give up killing each other, we’re going to actually help Daisy learn how to swim.” 

Pietro’s mood flickered with a touch of mischievousness. “So I’m to fall on my sword and distract two thirds of the trio while you help Daisy?” 

“If you don’t mind.” Which Wanda knew he didn’t, she could feel it. “I am glad we are not siblings in the same way they are.” 

He snorted as Daisy sent a wave into Darcy. “It would not have suited us. It’s a good thing no one is siblings like them.”

“I don’t know, they don’t feel that unique.” Wanda used her powers to block some water from sloshing into them. “They’re just intense individuals.” 

Pietro stared at her. “I refuse to accept that. They’re too weird.” 

“And we’re what exactly?” She looked at him, sharing her amusement with him. 

He held up his hands. “We’re totally normal. Communication by magic space rock mind powers is completely normal.” 

“Of course.” Wanda barely kept from laughing as she returned to watching the Starks trying to kill each other in the pool. “If you try to drown me I’ll take advice from Darcy.” 

Pietro hopped to his feet. “Might be worth it.” He winked at her before vanishing in a blur. 

She sighed, well time to join in before her girlfriend was drowned on accident. Wanda brushed off her pants as she straightened and then headed to the locker rooms. Because of course Stark’s private pool had locker rooms. She was continuously baffled by Stark. The man spent money on the weirdest, most unnecessary, extravagance and she wasn’t even sure he remembered a fraction of the things he actually owned. 

Wanda waited till Pietro cannonballed into the pool, to slide in. He’d keep Peter and Darcy busy. She used her powers to gently push Daisy towards her and away from the chaos. She swam over easily. “Have you progressed to floating and blowing bubbles yet?” 

“Not at all.” Daisy panted, her eyes bright and happy as she used her toes to keep her face above water. 

She laughed in delight. “Come on, I’ll help you. There was a pool in our old neighborhood. We can work on it this week.” 

“You’re my favorite.” Daisy bopped forward and kissed her lightly. “So you said something about floating?” 

Wanda caught Daisy’s arm and pulled her further away from the others. “The first step is learning to float on your back.” 

“You can certainly get me on my back.” Daisy teased gently, a knowing smirk in her eye. 

She slapped her shoulder lightly. “You’re terrible! Now come on, we don’t have forever till they realize I’ve stolen you.” 

Wanda lazily sipped at her weird juice thing Darcy had ordered. She was exhausted, sprawled along one couch, Daisy slumped half against half on her. Pietro was half swallowed in a bean bag pretending he was asleep. Peter was actually conked out on Darcy’s shoulder where they were sprawled on the other couch. 

“So we should do that again.” Darcy mumbled before taking a slightly obnoxious slurp of her own juice. 

Daisy let out a groan. “Maybe give me like two weeks to get past the doggy paddle stage.”

“You were doing really well.” Wanda chimed in gently. 

Darcy let out a groan. “How are you two so gross? Like tall dark and easter European pulling off ‘mysterious wiccan’ vibes meets 007 hacker punk and you two turn into mushy grossness. How are you the two coolest people I know and the lamest couple.” 

“Thanks Wanda.” Daisy raised a prominent middle finger towards her sister while purposely not looking at her. 

Darcy scoffed. “Thor, I’m going to get a cavity.” 

Wanda glanced over at Darcy. “I can tell you’re happy when you see us.” 

“That’s cheating is what that is.” Darcy pouted only to wince as she went to move. “I’m going to regret this so much in the morning.” 

Daisy leaned forward and stole a sip from Wanda’s juice. “This is why you should have been joining Peter and Pietro for workouts.” 

“Fuck no.” Darcy managed to look surprisingly indignant considering they were all wearing essentially comfy work out gear and smelled like chlorine. “I go to a self defence class once a week, I learned how to shoot a gun against my morals by the by, but no way in hell I’m joining enhanced workouts from hell. I’m not doing it.” 

Wanda actually agreed completely with Darcy. “If I wasn’t an Avenger I would not be doing the workouts Steve and Natasha made for me.” 

“I accept I’ve turned into a workout freak.” Daisy felt surprisingly amused. “You know I complained about SHIELD being a 24/Fitness when I first joined?” 

It was oddly difficult to picture a Daisy who wasn’t deeply physical. Wanda actually paused slightly at that. “What did you do when you were bored?”

“I watched a lot of youtube videos, hacked a lot, reddit. Just so much time on reddit. Also was living off of gas station food so it was a bit of a system shock to join SHIELD.” Daisy’s face scrunched up slightly. “Even if my SO was originally Ward.” 

Wanda ran a hand down Daisy’s back in comfort. “It is odd to think of you before you were an agent.” 

“I’m more concerned that a year ago Wanda was Hydra and four years ago you were a cyber terrorist.” Darcy looked at them before shaking her head. “How you’re so gooey I don’t know. It’s not the Stark genes that’s for sure.” 

Daisy just flipped her sister off again. 

Which Wanda wasn’t sure why exactly but she laughed, running her fingers through Daisy’s hair. She was delighted as she felt the gentle vibrations from her girlfriend. It happened when Daisy forgot to control everything. Not that she’d ever say it, she was fairly sure Daisy wasn’t even aware of it. It was nice as they all fell silent in quiet companionship, all of them just sprawled out everywhere in their apartment.

Peter let out a particularly loud snore. 

“Is he ok?” Daisy shifted so her head was laying on Wanda’s shoulder, an arm wrapping around her waist. Her thumb rubbing circles against Wanda’s hip absentmindedly. 

Darcy straightened Peter’s hair, he kept on sleeping. “He’ll live.” 

Daisy hummed. “We’re not going to be able to use any of the footage from today are we?” 

“Not a bit of it.” Darcy snorted. “Maybe a few frames but I’m not hopeful.” 

Wanda laughed outright. “The murder attempts wouldn’t play well I think.” 

////

Yuri glanced up as Quake settled next to her, before going back to her binoculars. “You’re early?” 

“Eh, the kid is getting better at undercover. He’s going in through the vents. If he runs into trouble he can hold out till I can get to him.” Quake passed her a granola bar. “So how much evidence are you thinking before the case is airtight?” 

She considered that, they’d pulled in a lot with the bugs, files, and that one informant. “We could take in most of them now. But I need something flashy if I want to make sure they can’t try and make some deal with the prosecution.” 

“That’s fair. I was thinking if we take down Hammerhead first, well that’d spook some of the Magia enough we might get some low level guys to flip.” Quake suggested. 

Yuri would admit that was a good point. “I’d ask you if you were sure you could take him, but I saw what you did to that kraken.” 

“I’m getting pretty awesome at punching things.” Quake made a slightly amused sound. “Want to ask what’s been bugging you?” 

She cursed the fact that hiding things from the woman was basically a joke. “Look, Spiderkid’s your brother right?” 

“And what makes you think that?” Which, oh Quake’s voice was definitely dangerous now. 

Yuri pulled back from her binoculars and looked at Quake. “I can ignore the fact he’s obviously a teenager if he’s got someone like you following him around watching his back. But there’s two reasons for you to be following him around. Most likely he’s your brother. Or, you’re romantically involved with him.” 

Quake twitched at the word ‘romantically’. She sighed. “Yeah he’s my brother. I don’t have to explain why spreading that would be bad for his safety do I?” 

“Because it’s an open secret in intelligence you’re Daisy Johnson. I've got a friend in the FBI who mentioned it.” Yuri relaxed, which thank god. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep my mouth shut. I’m just glad I don’t have to try and arrest you for statutory rape. That would have been… I don’t see that going well for anyone.” 

Quake, or Daisy actually snorted. “Darcy would kill me if that happened. Can you imagine the media nightmare?” 

“I can. Thank god you’re siblings. I really would get fired if you didn’t make me a smear trying to arrest you though.” Yuri shivered, she had not been looking forward to the inevitable death trying to take on someone like Quake as an unenhanced police detective. 

Quake actually snickered at that. “If it makes you feel better I wouldn’t have hurt you for trying to arrest me for something like that. Wouldn’t have let you arrest me, but wouldn’t have hurt you.” 

-”I got the files”- Spiderman’s voice came in through the comms. -”Leaving now. And please stop talking about Spiderquake, it’s gross.”-

“Rodger, also don’t get cocky. You’re an underpaid pizza delivery kid if anyone spots you between the office and the vent. Dissatisfied misery is the mood.” Quake chided gently, humor easy to hear in her voice. 

Yuri shook her head. “You know you two are so much scarier than most people realize. It’s the spy stuff not the kraken punching that is scary.” 

“I don’t know, it could be worse. My SO is way scarier than me. And the kid still has curfew.” Quake passed her another usb of whatever she’d found through arguably legal means. 

-”Hey!”-

Yuri raised her comm to her mouth. “Pizza delivery kids don’t yelp at thin air.” She grinned at Quake. “Have I mentioned how disturbingly useful you yahoos are as partners?” 

-”Uh this file is a contract for someone named Aleksei? How dramatically Russian can your name be? Maybe Vlad would be worse?”-

Yuri and Quake both snapped into the mike at the same time. “Stop talking till you get out!”

////

Darcy woke up with a hangover and a slight feeling of dread. She cracked an eye open. Fucknuggets. With the subtlety and stealth of a rock she slid/thudded out of bed. Her head popped up, no her bedmate had not woken up. She breathed out in relief. Ok. She could do this.

Fuck, where were her clothes?

She cringed at her shirt that was clearly still wet from spilled tequila...right. Grabbing her bra and jeans she accepted the rest was a lost cause or just...had no idea where it was. Her cellphone had a minor charge. Thanking Thor, she stuck it under her chin while she pulled on her pants. Pausing she glanced out the window. “Shit.” It was snowing, of course it was fucking snowing it was December...how the fuck was she supposed to do a walk of shame in the snow with no shirt? 

Darcy was just...she stared at her contacts. That was...Aunt May was a no go obviously. Daisy was at her stupid morning therapy, which...Hunter was a good option. He was her bodyguard, totally something he should be down for doing. Even if it was his day off...god she wasn’t that big of an asshole. With great reluctance she dialed a number. 

It only took two rings before an irritatingly awake voice picked up. -”Darcy? What are you doing calling this early?”-

She kept her voice at a bit of a hiss. Sweet Thor her head hurt. “I need a favor.” 

Darcy grabbed the stack of clean clothes from Pietro’s arms. “Oh thank Thor.” 

“Hello to you too sweetheart.” Pietro chuckled while leaning against the hallway. 

She scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Really?” 

“Too much?” Pietro gave her an amused once over. “Is this a walk of shame? I’ve never had one.” 

Darcy jabbed a finger at him. “You do runs of shame asshat.” She hopped on one foot and yanked on a sock. “Don’t go pretending you’ve got any more dignity than me. We can’t all have touched magic space rocks.” 

“Fair, fair.” Pietro held up his hands in surrender, though his stupid smug smirk didn’t go away. He glanced at the door. “So who are you running out on? Because I do not remember you avoiding mornings after.” 

Darcy cringed at that. “I was very drunk. Bad decisions happened, sleeping with the ex is not a morning after I’m prepared for with a hangover.” 

“Ian?” Pietro bit down on his lower lip to keep from laughing outright. “You slept with the puppy?” 

She groaned while dragging on her jacket. “Yes, yes I was stupid. Let’s get greasy diner food and coffee now.” 

“I see, I’m just a taxi service to you. How shall I survive?” Pietro mocked while zipping to her side and hooking an arm around her. And then the world blurred. 

Darcy moaned into her cup of coffee. Thor, she was addicted to that sweet, sweet caffeine. “Ok, you can live and I owe you one.” 

“I spend several nights a week at your apartment to avoid our sisters. Some of which are quite pleasant.” He winked at her as he referred to their occasional nights in bed instead of just binging tv. “The horrible part is that I keep learning new and horrifying things about their powers, I do not want to know.” Pietro stared at his pancakes like they might hold the answers to the universe. “I thought if Wanda blocked our bond occasionally it would be enough. The water on my bedside table got knocked off by quakes last week.” 

Darcy tapped her coffee mug against his. “I didn’t need to know that, but also that’s hilarious.”

“I am happy for Wanda but…” Pietro’s nose scrunched. “This is not how she felt about the girls in Sokovia I was with.” 

Darcy stabbed her sausage link. “It’s cause you’re happy for her and not just vaguely disgusted. Also I doubt she dealt with learning quite so much about your sex life.” 

“That is fair.” Pietro dumped sugar into his coffee. “Do you think they realize they’ve mostly moved in together? They just switch between our place and the Parker house.” 

Darcy smirked. “Nope, and we’re not telling them. I’m looking forward to being woken up at one am by a panicking Daisy when she realizes.” 

“They deserve the panic.” He agreed easily. “But you are avoiding. How did you end up fucking the puppy?” 

She let her head hit the table. “Oh Thor.” Darcy groaned, but looked up. “Janey nation got back from Antartica last night. We did margaritas. Tequila happened, and Ian was there and he’s reasonably cute.” 

“And you forgot he follows you like a mopey puppy.” He winked at her. “I’ll have to drop by the lab to watch the trainwreck.” 

Darcy took a bite of her sausage. “This is going to suck.” 

“I think you already did that.” He sniggered. 

She chucked her napkin at him. “Boo!” 

////

May shifted through the bills. “Is it weird I’m thankful for bills that haven’t been paid yet?” 

“It means Daisy is listening to you and respecting your authority. A good sign, Starks are masters of agreeing politely and then doing exactly what they were going to do anyways.” Pepper replied from her side of the video call. 

Morse set a stack of papers down on Pepper’s desk. “Speaking from experience with Daisy, the fact she’s stopped just paying your bills is a good step. From the way I hear it it took a nanny bracelet, multiple near death experiences, and a year for her to actually listen to Coulson more than half the time.” 

“Is it bad I’m thankful she’s past her teen years?” May grinned. “And she thinks I don’t notice her sneaking out or Wanda sneaking in. At least she’s not like Darcy sneaking in every couple of weeks with a hangover from margarita nights.” 

Morse hummed a slightly thoughtful look on her face. “If you are noticing her sneaking it’s because she isn’t trying to hide it from you.” 

“Spies.” Pepper sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “It’s like Tony pretending he doesn’t know when my birthday is. I know he knows, he knows I know he knows. But he still insists he doesn’t know so he has an excuse to do something ridiculous and over the top for it. I almost miss when he actually did forget my birthday.” 

May signed on the check for the garbage and slid it into the correct envelope. “Does this mean I should continue to act like I don’t know or that I should say something?” 

“Imply you know but don’t push it.” Morse replied easily. “Also would you please make sure my idiot husband is eating.” 

She smiled at that. “He’s coming to dinner tonight. I think the kids plan to drag him into whatever it is they’re doing with the mafia.” 

“Sounds fun.” Morse looked slightly dreamy for a second. 

May and Pepper shared disbelieving looks of commiseration. 

Pepper cleared her throat. “How’s Peter doing?” 

“Moping because his crush is dating a senior boy.” May picked up her electric bill, absently skimming it to make sure everything was in order. “It’s probably for the best that he never got the nerve up to ask her out. He’s wonderful, but two years is a lot in high school.” 

With a light chuckle, Pepper signed something on her end. “I remember high school, dark days filled with acne and braces. Bobby Kestler asked me to junior prom and the whole time there was something stuck in his braces and I just stood there like a deer in headlights.” 

“Oh gosh Ben was so awkward back then. Always tripping over his words, just a twig of a boy trying to be all chivalrous. Peter is so like him sometimes.” May smiled softly at the memory of the early days between her and Ben. “But Ben took a photo of the moon, printed it and mailed it to me. Said it was as close to catching the moon for me as he could do on short notice. I had to kiss him after that. And he never gave me reason to regret that. Not really.” 

Pepper looked up at the camera. “I wish we could have met him.” 

“He was a good man.” May set her pen down. “He and Tony would butt heads like no one's business.” She laughed at the thought of that. 

Pepper smiled back at her. “God the posturing would be awful. Tony’s bad enough about Step-dad Brad and Coulson.” 

“This is why I’m your assistant Ms Potts and not Tony’s.” Morse added her face somehow miraculously professional. 

May bit back a laugh at that. “I like you and Tony Pepper. But you could not pay me to work for Tony.” 

“I don’t blame you. It takes a special mindset.” Pepper’s eyes were bright. “But then I’m not the one raising three of his kids.” 

May shared a look with Bobbie. “Really, you want to bring up Stark children? You’re their step-mom. Also any plans for future little Starks?”


	37. Therapy That Flies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Sam Wilson, and I know he doesn't fit much into any of the plotlines in this. But just throwing out I'm super excited for the Winter Solider and Falcon tv show or is The Falcon and Winter Soldier? Either way I'm supes excited.

Steve felt jittery as he tightened his tie. “Are you ready?” 

“Punk I’ve been ready. Would you stop vibrating? You’re going to wear a hole in the floor.” Bucky snarked as he dutifully let Darcy inspect his coal grey suit that was styled to be as military looking as possible without being an actual uniform. His hair was neatly styled and pulled back into what they’d been informed was a ‘sexy man bun, but professional’. 

Steve gave Darcy a thankful nod while forcing himself to still. “Sorry, it’s just a big day.” 

“Dude chill pill. Take one.” Darcy stepped over and slapped his hands away and straightened his tie. “It’s the first day. Lots of boring mumbo jumbo, some opening arguments and then we get milkshakes and doom scroll the internet to see how people are reacting initially. It’ll help shape our media campaign.” 

Natasha popped a bubble from where she was lounging in an easy chair, chewing gum and pretending to read a magazine. “Listen to the Doctor.” 

“I know, I just.” Steve looked at his best friend. The person he’d loved for most of his life. Not that he was going to tell that to anyone, about how they very much hadn’t been strictly platonic since they were teenagers back in Brooklyn. Honestly people saw what they wanted to see and once they’d started stepping out with Peggy everybody just assumed things. Not that they’d been wrong, he’d loved Peggy. They just missed the part where it hadn’t just been him and Peggy. 

Of course there was the disaster of him stepping out with Sharon. Which by the end had been more out of habit than anything else. It was a bit jarring how Darcy Lewis had spotted the very real, core of feelings between him and Buck. Of course she assumed closeted pining not the trauma that was actually keeping anything from progressing. Honestly as if he was going to bring up how things used to be when Bucky was barely holding onto a sense of self. Once Buck was better they could deal with what they were to each other. All that mattered now was that he was with him till the end of the line. Period. 

Which is why this trial was so important. Steve needed Bucky as much as Bucky needed him. He couldn’t let his best friend end up in jail. It would be wrong. So now he was letting himself be dressed up like a performing monkey once again. As always. At least Darcy had a sense of subtlety that Tony did not, which was weird. But the subdued navy suit with a maroon vest, tie, white shirt, and freshly re-dyed blonde hair wasn’t obviously a subdued american flag, but it clearly was that. 

“Dude, stop staring into space.” Darcy snapped her fingers in front of him. “It’s going to be fine. Today is all cameras, legal shit and then milkshakes. Chill out.” 

Bucky clasped his shoulder. “What’s going to happen is going to happen.” 

“Alright boys, time to head out.” Natasha easily slid to her feet. She glanced at them and smirked. “Don’t look so uptight, Daisy’s hiding in the security detail and can disintegrate any bullets so really the rest of us are there to look pretty.

Steve let out a deep breath. “Right, let’s do this.” 

“That’s the spirit. And know I’m there in spirit even if I’m not there in person.” Darcy grinned at them, a sparkle in her eye. “And I’m watching you like a bird in the sky. Or a creepy basement dwelling hacker. Whichever you prefer. There’s a camera in all the sunglasses for security and FRIDAY, Hill and I will be monitoring.” 

He looked at the woman. She owed him nothing, wasn’t even doing this for him or Bucky. But she was still doing it. He would never be able to tell her how grateful he was even if this didn't go well. She’d still done more than he could have asked for. “Thank you, for everything.” 

“Duh, I’m awesome like that. You can thank me when I get Bucky Bear off with just some community service or something.” Darcy winked and then trounced off. 

Steve shook his head fondly, looking over at Bucky. It was time. 

////

Daisy was amused by looking like an MIB. Honestly, black suit, sunglasses, weird obvious ear comm, standard issue law enforcement piece prominently placed on her hip. It was ridiculous, she belonged next to Will Smith in the next MIB. It was sad real aliens had caused the sequel to be delayed. That movie had been a riot. She knew she blended in with the rest of the private security as she opened the door. “Game face on boys.” 

Steve shot her a look as he climbed out, Bucky and Natasha on his heels. The lawyers who’d been waiting were instantly there shaking hands and directing everyone into the courthouse. 

The reporters were shoving, there were crowds of yelling people, cameras flashing everywhere. 

Daisy used herself to physically help elbow a hole for the group to move through. The lights were actually blinding, most of her concentration was on parsing out the vibrations all around. She could pick up the distinctive vibrations of guns. It had taken so long to learn to do that. But mapping out the locations of every armed individual was difficult. Frowning she focused entirely on what she felt, mostly letting the other security do the majority of the work creating a path. 

Getting inside was a relief. So many fewer vibrations to have to pay attention to. Also thick marble walls to muffle some of the outside vibrations. Her eyes opened for the first time since the initial crush. She breathed out. 

“You ok kid?” Sam asked softly by her elbow. 

She just moved carefully, trusting him to stand at her back. “Seeing with vibrations just takes a lot.” 

“You’re doing good.” Sam let their elbows brush against each other. 

Daisy was bored as she leaned against the outer wall of the courtroom. She kept her voice low lest anyone important hear her voice. “Tv court conditioned me to think this would be far more interesting.” 

“Right? And we’re the idiots who volunteered for this.” Sam chuckled. “At least it’s not everyday.” 

“Do you think we’re over guarding this? I mean super soldier, Inhuman, super spy, eight former SHIELD agents, and we’ve hooked up every camera for four square miles up to FRIDAY.” Daisy crossed her arms. Dear god, how was a case about a brainwashed super soldier turned into an assassin for the Russians this boring? It was bizarre. 

He made a sound in the back of his throat. “I don’t know, I think the paranoia is pretty grounded in this situation.” 

There was a clicking sound over the comms. -”Right, I switched us to a private channel, don’t worry you’re still hooked to the main channel just muted. But holy shit your therapist is the fucking Falcon?!”- Darcy’s voice blared into their ears. 

Daisy winced slightly. “Volume, and yeah? How did you not know that? You live out of the tower a third of the time.” 

-”No really, the only therapist you could find is an Avenger? How does that conversation even happen?”- 

“She bought me a coffee and asked.” Sam looked bemused. 

Darcy made a spluttering sound. -”Betrayal! Is this why Sam avoided the the paint slick trap?!”-

“You betrayed team Stark first.” Daisy replied dryly while reaching up and fist bumping Sam as discreetly as possible.

Maria Hill’s voice cut through. -”I don’t know what is so important you made a secondary channel for it but close it down Lewis.”-

Daisy gave Sam an amused look, and then focused back on the court. She eyed the reporters who’d been allowed in suspiciously. “I’m gonna have to talk to a reporter soon aren’t I?”

“Most likely.” Sam agreed. “Want a lift to Queens after this?” 

She gave a slight nod. “Sounds good, gonna carry me like a pretty princess Flyboy?” 

“And get fried by our Witchy friend? No thank you.” He snorted outright. 

Daisy raised a brow. “Bet I can get you to change your mind.” 

“Not taking that bet. I have learned to never bet against someone who can kick my ass.” Sam gave her a look. “You’re not really going to get me to carry you?” 

“What? Let me live my teenage dream of a Superhero dramatically flying me someplace.” Her lips twitched up in amusement. 

-”For the love of god could you show some professionalism?”- Hill’s voice snapped across the comms. Several muffled snickers from the other security agents there in the background. 

Sam and Daisy’s backs both automatically straightened as they replied simultaneously. “Sorry Ma’am.” 

“This is awesome!” Daisy whooped as they swooped through the sky above the city! “HOLY SHIT YOUR WINGS ARE SWEET!” 

////

Darcy clapped her hands as she examined the room of everyone gathered together. “First day over with!” 

There were some amused cheers and half hearted claps from the half dozen or so people roped into post trial milkshakes. 

She grinned and dropped down next to Daisy on the couch and turned on the news. Which, this was a bit of a wild card. You couldn’t 100% predict this shit. Especially with just...everything. So she watched with rapt curiosity like everyone else. 

-”And the biggest story of today is the Trial of James Barnes otherwise known as the Hydra assassin the Winter Soldier.”- The news anchor straightened the papers in front of him. -”For more on this historic case we’re going to Walters. So what can you tell us?”-

The screen changed to a painfully cookie cutter looking woman. “Thank you Brian. Today was a monumental day but you have to keep in mind it was just opening statements. The mood was tense outside the courthouse. But the prosecution said they are confident of a guilty verdict as they find that ‘there is no doubt in their minds that Mr Barnes committed these acts’. The defence stated that they are ‘sure the court will come to the correct decision. That Mr Barnes was not responsible for the actions his body took.’ Which is in line with the defence’s strategy.”- 

-“And what is that strategy?”-

The reporter nodded at the question. -”The Defence is arguing that due to brainwashing Mr Barnes was not capable of choosing to take or not take the actions he did. They are going to be citing the recent events surrounding the Kilgrave case from here in New York as well as bringing in Government officials to testify about other allegedly classified cases of mind control. We’ll also be hearing a lot about torture, brain damage, and the application of legal duress.”-

Darcy rolled her eyes. “Boo! Get to the good stuff.” 

“Really? You’ve been living for this.” Wanda zapped her lightly from where she was curled into Daisy’s other side. 

Steve spoke up from the other couch. “Why aren’t they talking about how awful the prosecution is!” 

“Because the prosecution are a bunch of jacked up neanderthals.” Hill drawled from where she was working on her caramel milkshake. 

Darcy made finger guns towards Hill. “Preach.” She straightened slightly. “Oooo! It’s up to one of our pundits here to argue with the squirrely one about the opening arguments.” 

“I don’t know why this has to be so complicated.” Steve’s eyes narrowed as the introductions continued on screen. 

Bucky shifted awkwardly from where he was perched on the edge of the farthest couch from the group. “It really is, I killed those people.” 

“You didn’t choose to.” Wanda argued, her face sharp while her grip on Daisy tightened slightly. “It is not the same.” 

Darcy shot Wanda an approving look. “Well said, mind control is fucked up.” 

“Crass, but true.” Steve agreed with all the self righteous conviction he possessed in his body.

Finally one of the pundits started actually saying something of consequence. -”Look, the heart of this case is whether the court finds that Mr Barnes was under duress and or coerced to a degree that he is not responsible for his own actions. There is legal precedent for that, the issue is can a super soldier with those kinds of abilities be controlled like that? I mean let’s be honest it’s not like they had his family hostage, or anyone held hostage to be used against him. And then once Captain America was awake why not go to him? Let’s face it Mr Barnes had options for getting out.”-

-”And look at it further, we’re supposed to believe that the deadliest assassin in the history of the world was unable to run away? To disappear? Escape? I find that pretty hard to swallow. That he attacked Captain America, his supposed best friend, actively attempting to stop his own rescue? And what does he do once Hydra is gone? He runs. Finally when he’s supposedly ‘free’ he goes on the run. Then months later he pops up asking us to believe he’s been the victim all along. We’re supposed to buy that? Cap might believe his best friend is what is sitting in Stark Tower right now but I think what’s in the Tower right now is a monster.”-

The other pundit had been shaking his head. -”That’s purposely reductive! He was a POW for seventy years! Subjected to from what information has been realeased, was clearly horrific torture, the scale of we still don’t know. And we know mind control is a part of our world now!”-

Steve sounded growly. “Change the channel.” 

“Sure, FRIDAY switch us up!” Darcy slurped at her milkshake, not that she was surprised. “Ya know this is about what I was expecting. Lots of arguing.” 

Steve’s head snapped to her. “What?” 

“Dude, on the first day, we’re just making sure the arguing isn’t falling more to one side or the other.” She shrugged. “As the lawyers start dropping the deets on the court the media will eat that shit up.” 

He stared. “What?” 

“Did PR not talk to you about what to expect from this Captain?” Hill, bless her, raised a brow while turning her full attention to the man. 

Darcy cranked the volume down. “Hill you want to fall on this sword or should I?” 

“I’ve got it.” Hill pinched the bridge of her nose. “This entire case is based on whether or not Barnes was in his right mind and whether he was able to act against orders. By pleading brainwashing, the defence has admitted Barnes here is guilty of the actus reus of the crimes he’s accused of. Or in simpler terms he physically committed them. What is in contention is the mens rea, or whether he is mentally guilty of the crime. The focus of our legal defense is that due to the chair, trauma, and brainwashing from his time with Hydra and the KGB he was unable mentally to be held responsible for his actions. Which would make him mentally unable to understand what he was doing fully and more importantly was unable not to. Most of it is modeled after previous cases involving kidnappings and consent laws. Applying them to premeditated murder though hasn’t been done to this degree before. It’s legally tenuous, but will set a lot of legal precedent so it’s being allowed.” 

Steve stared at her. “I got that, why does this affect the media?” 

“Because normal people don’t accept brainwashing as a thing. Not how those of us in this room do. Hell Wanda here could have us all dancing around like ballerinas if she wanted to. But we’re not civilians. What we’re watching for is whether civilians are dismissive of the defense’s stated strategy or not. The fact the pundits are genuinely arguing already is good. Once we start dropping the evidence it’s going to change the tone. But right now the fact anyone is even seriously considering it as a possibility that he isn’t fully guilty is a good sign that the evidence is going to change enough minds that we’ll win this case both legally and in the court of public opinion.” 

Darcy chimed in. “I care more about the public opinion thing. Gotta keep my peeps safe.” She leaned over and pressed a very gross kiss to Daisy’s cheek. 

“Oh come on.” Daisy’s nose scrunched up as she wiped at her cheek with her sleeve. “Really?” 

She just grinned. “You know I love you dude.” Darcy looked back up at Steve. “And opinion actually seems pretty split which is good. That’s split opinion just based on your social capital. It’s not fact based at all. So once we dump facts, it’s gonna be awesome. Tis a good sign my hot Dorito.” 

“FRIDAY turn up the volume.” Sam cut in as the screen changed to show a short video clip of him and Daisy landing in Queens. “What the fuck?” 

-”And in other news it may be the end of Spiderquake. Earlier today this video was taken of Quake looking cozy with the Avenger’s Falcon and Spiderman nowhere in sight.”-

Darcy couldn’t help it, she cackled. 

////

May snagged the cellphone out of Darcy’s hands. “No phones at the dinner table. You can check your campaign against the world after dinner.” She set the bowl of steamed rice down on the table as she spoke. “And Peter grab the silverware please.” 

“Got it Aunt May!” He called as he came swinging around a corner. At least he wasn’t trying to use webs in the house again. That had been a necessary ban. The stuff took hours to clean up. 

Daisy’s face was alight with mirth as she carried the giant bowl of stir fry over. “Yeah Darcy, no phones at the table.” 

“Shut it hypocrite.” Darcy stuck her tongue out at her sister. 

May pretended she didn’t see the exchange, as the siblings had started pushing each other's buttons for fun, the chaos had increased. It reminded her of her and Mary a bit. She reached out pulling Peter close enough to kiss the crown of his head. “Darcy did you get the soy sauce out yet?” 

“On the table.” Darcy hollered back at her. 

She grabbed the napkins. “Inside voices please.” 

“Oooo.” Daisy wiggled her eyebrows at Darcy as she slid into her seat at the table. 

May just huffed slightly as she took her own seat. Which, it was funny, they all had a seat that was ‘their’ seat. Her own was the head of the table, a seat a few years ago would have been Ben’s. “Alright everyone, dinner.” 

Peter happily started dumping rice onto his plate. “MJ, Ned and I have another group project. Think you can get us an in? It’s on a legal case of our choosing and we want to do it on Barnes’s.” 

“I see how it is, use me for my contacts.” Darcy winked at Peter. “But yeah I got you baby bro.” 

Peter pouted. “I’m not a baby.” 

“Who thought fighting a werewolf by themself was a good idea?” Darcy stole the rice bowl from him. 

He looked torn between protesting and accepting the dig. “At least I’m not the one whose big plan was to throw our sister, who can’t swim, at the kraken.” 

Daisy interjected dryly. “I’m getting better at swimming.” Both of her siblings ignored her.

“It worked didn’t it.” Darcy replied smugly as she passed the bowl off. “I seem to remember someone almost ending up with their own doggy gear for full moons.” 

Peter’s face twitched slightly. “Daisy almost drowned.” 

“I didn’t drown.” 

He kept going. “And I seem to have noticed Ian’s been mooning after you at the lab more than usual. You wouldn’t know anything about that would you?” 

Darcy’s face actually flushed slightly, which point to Peter for that. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Her eyes narrowed. 

“It’s because our dearest sister here takes after our dad sometimes.” Daisy smirked slightly as she took a bite of dinner. 

Peter’s face scrunched up. “Gross.” 

“Hey, I’m a single and attractive woman. No judging sprout.” Darcy pointed her fork at him. 

May cleared her throat. “Daisy, how was working security for the trial?” 

“Boring, so boring.” Daisy rolled her eyes. “I’m just glad I only volunteered to work security at high risk stages of the trail. I think if I had to stand around doing nothing during actual court proceedings again, I’d fall asleep with my eyes open.” 

Darcy perked up. “Get this, Daisy’s therapist is Sam Wilson. She hunted down birdboy.” 

“Wait really!?” Peter looked at Daisy excitedly. “Do you think you get him to fly us up really high? I’ve been wanting to practice air control more.” 

Daisy hummed. “Yeah I could ask. It’d probably be good for both of us.” 

“Please say you’re not discussing getting the Falcon to fly you two up as high as he can and then dropping you?” May asked, feeling slightly exhausted just thinking about it. Because that was totally something they would do. 

Two equally guilty looks aimed at her answered that question. 

She sighed. “Do I need to be worried?” 

“We’ll be fine. I’ll make sure Wanda or someone is there to catch us if something goes wrong.” Daisy offered, clearly trying to be reassuring...it was not that reassuring. 

Darcy snickered. “You think you can do anything productive while that girlfriend of yours is around?” 

“Which one of us slept with our ex?” Daisy challenged. 

May spotted Peter’s fork whacking him in the chin. “Daisy no powers at the table.” 

“Ha!” Peter stuck his tongue out at Daisy. 

May leaned back in her chair as the kids devolved into more bickering. It filled her heart with a warmth that felt consuming. This was her family, and it was good. She loved these kids more than she’d have thought a person could love another. She couldn’t have cared more if she’d brought them into the world. At least she missed the diaper stage, she heard it wasn’t fun. 

“No kicking at the table, and don’t think I didn’t see you stealing from your sister’s plate.”


	38. Bucky Gets a Job...Somehow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am snowed in at the moment. So four day weekend for me, I wrote an entire chapter yesterday. It's been nice, other than having to dig the cars out.

Daisy really should have expected it when she spotted the reporter loitering by the entrance to Kyle’s ninja gym. Of course the media would know she was working with Kyle for the charity run. It was probably the easiest way to nab her. She should probably talk to him about temporary security. Like yesterday. Or mention to Yuri that the police should probably drive their patrols through the block more often. Probably. 

She considered her options, well Darcy had said she’d need to at some point. With a muttered curse she hopped off the roof and softened her landing enough not to break anything as she hit the sidewalk. She blinked as the reporter practically shoved her phone into her face. “Quake!” 

“Uh...hi?” Daisy wasn’t actually sure what to do with a reporter this enthusiastic. The part of her that had been trained by May catalogued the age, eagerness, and slightly manic energy marking the reporter down as junior, trying to make a name for herself, and very far down the totem pole. Also based on the look in her eyes a fangirl. Which...shit she had fans now didn’t she? 

The reporter actually flushed slightly. “I’m Betty with Columbia University’s Student Paper and I was hoping you could answer some questions our readers have for you?” 

Daisy realized that Betty was probably actually the same age as her. Which wasn’t that bizarre to see someone well adjusted and the same age. “Sure, though if I get a call I might need to leave early.” 

“Right, so Joanna S. wants to know who would win in a fight, you or Hulk?” Betty was clearly reading from a list of student questions. It was rather charming. 

She dropped a hand onto her hip and let herself smile slightly. “I’m not sure, I’ve never fought him.” Her head cocked to one side. “Probably him? My powers don’t come with super strength or stamina or anything and his definitely do. And he heals so even if I could hurt him he’d probably outlast me despite it. So probably Hulk.” 

“Cool, so Jason P wants to know if you’re going to be joining the Avengers?” Betty was so desperately trying to be serious. It was kind of hilarious how she was clearly completely star struck at the same time. 

Daisy shook her head. “Not really. I mean if they needed my particular abilities I’m more than willing to help out. And I know if I asked they’d help me and Spiderman out. But I’m here to protect New York. And the occasional SHIELD job.” 

“But you and Spiderman have been spotted with several members of the Avengers. Particularly Scarlet Witch, Quicksilver and the Falcon.” She pressed, her stance surprisingly resolute. 

Daisy brushed some of her hair out of her face. “Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver are around the same age as Spiderman and I. We’re friends.” 

“So my next question is a bit of a follow up to the last. Bong-Cha wants to know if you broke up with Spiderman for the Falcon?” Betty was vibrating, she was clearly invested. 

The sound of disbelief that came out of Daisy’s throat wasn’t one she knew she could make. It was silly too because she’d known it was coming. But god the whole thing was so beyond ridiculous she couldn’t help it. “No, I’m definitely not in any way romantically involved with the Falcon. Dude’s forty something. I don’t mind older guys but not by twenty years. The flying is just super cool. Tell me you wouldn’t ask for a flight if you had the chance?” 

“You didn’t say whether you’d broken up with Spiderman, and you haven’t been spotted together in a week.” Betty pushed. 

Daisy snorted. “A friend called in a favor and I’ve been kinda busy. Spiderman can more than handle the neighborhood without me. It doesn’t mean we’re fighting. He’s way too excited about the ‘lone patrol’ thing anyways.” 

“So you’re still seeing each other outside of hero-ing?” 

“It’s kinda hard to completely miss someone you live with.” Daisy faked a freeze, Darcy owed her for doing this. She raised an open hand to her face. “We can’t pretend I didn’t say that can we?” 

Betty stared at her, there were practically stars in her eyes. “OMG, you live together!?” 

“Fine, yes we live together. And if he doesn’t stop leaving legos on the ground where I end up stepping on them I’m going to throttle him.” Daisy let out a long resigned sigh. It was kinda fun to pretend to have been caught out. “He’s more of a dork than his videos make him out to be, he blubbers during Pride and Prejudice, has a terrible sense of his own limits, will eat nothing but junk food if left to his own devices, and is constantly hanging from the ceiling because he thinks it’s funny. But he’s also the single best guy I’ve ever met.” 

Betty looked like she might actually keel over from sheer joy. It took her a solid five minutes to calm down enough to keep talking. Finally the girl cleared her throat. “Right, um.. So Aaron V wants to know what you think of the Barnes trial.” 

“Barnes needs like an army of therapists, a vacation and to be left alone to heal. I met him, Darcy needed someone as security who could subdue him if he got triggered or something a couple months ago. Dude just feels tired. Like I’ve never met anyone that bone weary before in my life. He mostly just knits scarves and hats while hiding in the Hulk containment room with his cats.” 

Betty blinked. “Cats?” 

“Huh? Oh right. Spiderman and I got him these two rescue cats. I mean the guy’s lonely and basically in a self imposed solitary confinement. We thought it’d be good for him. I mean Steve, the therapist, and the lawyers are the only ones who really talk to him.” 

The poor student reporter actually seemed kind of stumped at that. Like the idea of The Winter Soldier having a cat and being lonely was bizarre. But she clearly rallied. “Right, moving on, Katie V has a long question for you. Last week you escorted two drag queens safely back to their apartment after a performance. Does this mean you support gay rights?” 

Daisy smiled at that. “They were hilarious, I think I almost cracked a rib laughing so hard.” She really needed to drop by and say hi again. “But yes I support gay rights. It’d be kinda ridiculous if I didn’t all things considered.” 

“All things?” Betty seemed slightly confused, but a certain light in her eye said she’d picked up the implied subtext. 

Well Darcy was going to kill her, but whatever. “I’m bi, also an inhuman who grew up in the system. My answers are always going to be in support of a minority. Like just feel free to mark that one off. Judging people for who they are is ridiculous.”

“Right.” Betty swallowed, she looked fairly baffled and definitely overwhelmed. But she kept going. “So Nanami W want’s to know what’s it like to be a superhero?” 

Daisy paused at that one. “It's not...it's not for me to judge whether I’m a hero or not. I wouldn’t say I am one. I’m not here in New York because I decided to come be a hero. I’m here because Spiderman is. He’s the one you should ask about the hero stuff. I’ve never been a person to watch injustice and not do something. But I’m not…” She shrugged. “It’s complicated and really I’m not the one to ask. Rogers, Spiderman, even Stark are the ones you should ask about that sort of thing. Or Thor maybe. But it’s not as clean of an answer for people like me.”

“But you save people?” Betty pointed out like it was obvious. 

She rocked back on her heels. “There’s a lot of people who save others. EMTs, firemen, doctors, I mean just because I run around looking like this and punch people doesn’t make me better than anyone else. Working with SHIELD I met some of the most heroic people imaginable. I mean I wouldn’t even be here if the poor biochemist on our team hadn’t done everything to save us despite not being a medical doctor. Or Fitz going on a mission behind enemy lines to deactivate a sonic weapon of mass destruction, despite not having even passed his field assessment. Which check out those files from the dump. There’s lots of people who are heros, a mask and being part alien aren’t what do that.” 

“Trent P wants to know who would win in a fight, you or Black Widow?” Betty scrolled further through the list of questions. 

Daisy accepted she was going to be here for a while. “Without powers her, with powers me but that’s in a fair fight. I’d probably bet on her in any sort of combat situation outside of a spar.”

////

Jane sipped at her coffee. She was bleary eyed, still in her pajamas, and trying to find her new pen. It had little galaxies on it and Erik had found it for her. Sorting through the stacks of papers on her desk she was quite intent on finding her pen. Damn it. Humming she accepted the poptart shoved into her hand. 

Munching on her poptart she paused as she saw a sheet of calculations that were… “Darcy, did I do sleep math again?” 

“Who knows Janey.” Darcy was elbow deep in the guts of something. “FRIDAY, did the Janey do the sleep math again?” 

“Last instance of math while sleeping was nine days ago.” FRIDAY replied. 

Jane stared at the math. Huh… “Ian didn’t you organize my notes before we left?” 

“Dr Selvig, you and Dr Lewis all wanted me to organize your notes? I’m working on it.” Ian replied from where he was...working on a desk with paper towers higher than his head. 

She blinked and looked around the lab. It had been deteriorating from Darcy’s usual chaotic organization since Darcy had been more involved with the science and whatever she was doing outside of the lab. “Do we need another assistant?” 

“Intern! Do you need help?” Darcy looked up from the guts of..honestly what on earth was that? 

Ian’s cheeks turned a bright red at Darcy’s full attention being on him. “What? No I can do it!” 

Darcy rolled her eyes. “I didn’t say replace you, I meant get a minion of your own for coffee and shit, so you have more time for notes.” 

“Oh.” Ian blinked, his mouth slightly too open as he stared at Darcy. “Then uh..yeah?” He nodded seemingly coming out of whatever fugue state he was in. “Yes that sounds good.” 

Darcy nodded. “Cool, Janey you don’t mind if the new minion has a dark and stormy past? Cause I think I know someone.” 

Jane stared at Ian who was pretending not to be eagerly listening in. She looked at Darcy who was pointedly ignoring the intern. “I’m doing the interview.” 

“You never do the interviews? I showed up at your office and interviewed you before I started working for you.” Darcy stared at her in confusion. “You hate interviews. They give you like science flashbacks to the doctoral boards and funding presentations.” 

This was all completely true. Jane may not register everything around her, but she had registered the painful awkwardness around the lab though. No. Not even for the sake of avoiding an interview would she let Darcy add more drama to the lab. No. “I’m doing the interview.” 

“I’m wounded boss lady.” Darcy pouted at her. 

Erik patted Darcy on the head. “There there.” 

Jane bustled into the apartment of Darcy’s pick for the new lab assistant. She’d put on actual pants and showered. No sense scaring the new minion before he’d even seen the lab. Her eyes caught the startled looking man on the couch. “You!” 

“Me?” Bucky Barnes pointed at his own chest. He blinked. “How did you get in here? You shouldn’t be in here.” 

Jane ignored most of that. “I hear you like science and technology and need a job?” 

“Huh?” He stared at her. “Sorta?”

She nodded, crossing her arms while looking at him. “Have you ever slept with Darcy Lewis?” 

“No!” He actually blanched in the appropriate level of horror for someone who knew what a hurricane of a person Darcy was. 

Jane gave a relieved sigh at that, her eyes stayed narrowed though. “And you can swear to never sleep with her? Because I cannot deal with some lab triangle or trail of broken hearts or whatever productivity sucking drama she inspires in the intern multiplying.” 

“I can promise not to do that? I think Tony might actually kill me if I even thought of it.” Bucky looked fairly amused as if pieces of a puzzle were beginning to make sense. 

She eyed him, he didn’t look stupid and he was already involved in their weird world of crazy. He’d do. “In that case you start tomorrow. You can work weekends and file paperwork in the evenings after you get back from your trail. Ian will send the paperwork.” 

“Um...what?” Bucky blinked. 

Jane rolled her eyes. “You got the job, if you could work on a lab technician certificate that would be useful as well.” 

“.....I didn’t apply for a job though?”

////

Wanda stared at what she’d thought was an empty drawer. These Stark apartments were massive to a degree no one could possibly use all of the space. So she’d expected the drawer to be empty...it had very familiar flannel and black tank tops in it. And familiar underwear she was also quite familiar with. 

Her cheeks heated as she closed the drawer sharply. When had that happened? She looked at the second bedside table next to her bed. There was a glass of water, a Starkpad, and a spare Quake face mask. She turned and made her way into the main room of the apartment. 

“Pietro….how long has Daisy been living here?”

He looked up from where he’d been studying fire accelerants. A faint tingle of amusement accompanying his smirk. “From a different perspective how long have you been living at the Parker house?”

“I…” Wanda processed that. Well that was something wasn’t it. “I don’t think Daisy knows.” She finally settled on. Which she was actually unsure of how that was going to go. “Do you think...I mean….Daisy is not good with…” 

Pietro snorted. “You’ll be fine.” 

“She doesn’t...slow?” She wasn’t sure how to explain the slight fear she felt from Daisy when it came to them. Fear which Daisy responded to with panic, fleeing or punching the thing in the face that had caused that. 

Her brother stared at her, his emotions were vibrating with amusement. “Wanda, she's in love with you. We both know that. And she’s a spy, she’ll catch on eventually.” 

“I’m being silly.” Wanda slowly and deliberately breathed in and then out. She was going to have to talk to Daisy about it though. Which...they really hadn’t spoken much about the particulars of their relationship. Her powers were a bit of a crutch there really.

Pietro seemed to follow her thought process. “Or, you could just not mention it to our favorite inhuman till she realizes you two are basically moved in together? It will be hilarious.” 

“I would never.” Her eyes narrowed. “You and Darcy made a bet about this didn’t you?” 

He just grinned unrepentantly. “Can you blame us?” 

“Yes I can.” Wanda swept out of the apartment. She was sure Peter and Daisy would be happy to help make their siblings' lives miserable for betting on something that personal. 

Wanda lowered her feet on the edge of the building, her powers fading as they no longer were needed to hold her aloft. Her lips twitched as she spotted Spiderman, complete with a christmas sweater over the suit, swinging down the street after a car that was swerving as it squealed down the street. Hot on his heels were police cars, sirens blaring. 

She considered joining in only to smirk. It would seem she wasn’t needed. 

Quake dropped down straight in front of the fleeing vehicle, her vibrations acting like a brick wall stopping the car in a terrific crunch. She stood there like an immovable object while Peter swung in ripping the door off and pulling the criminal out. It would be cool if they weren’t wearing matching Christmas sweaters over their suits.The siblings high fived as the cops came squealing to stops as they arrived at the scene. 

Her powers lit up as she stepped off the side of the building. She glided gently down to the pavement where Daisy had just shoved the remains of the car out of the way of traffic. Wanda smiled in greeting as she landed. “I see you two have things handled.” 

“Hey Wanda!” Peter waved while hopping over. “Something up other than a concussed bank robber?” 

Wanda smiled at the kid. “I was going to ask if you two wanted to get ice-cream. But I can see I’m interrupting your afternoon.” 

“I don’t know, unless something else comes up I think we could be available.” Daisy winked at her while stepping away from the police officer she’d been speaking with. “Whatcha think Spiderman?” 

“Supes chill!” The eyes on Peter’s mask moved with his facial expressions giving a pleased expression. 

Wanda let a thread of her power touch Daisy, just enough the questioning on whether they could talk later would be understood.

Daisy looked at her curiously, while nodding slightly. “So thoughts on the sweaters?” 

“Is that a santa spider?” She looked at the design on Peter’s chest. 

He was clearly grinning. “If I have to wear a sweater we have to wear ones with style.” 

“Style?” Wanda couldn’t help her amused lilt to her voice. 

Daisy dropped her arm over Peter’s shoulders. “Tis the season. Don’t think you’re getting out of one of these for christmas dinner. We already got enough for everyone.” And there was genuine affection and excitement there. Even without feeling much from Daisy without her powers connecting them, she could feel that. 

Wanda had a feeling the sweaters were Daisy’s idea. She accepted ridiculous Christmas sweaters were in her future. Also Pietro’s. If she had to wear that so did he. “This will be our first Christmas you know, we never celebrated it.” 

“Do we need to hunt down a dreidel or something for you guys?” Daisy asked, seeming to realize why that would be immediately. “Or uh..the candle thing?” 

She couldn’t help her laugh at that. “Maybe next year, but we haven’t celebrated since we were children. I’m not sure we’d even remember what to do.” 

Daisy had an expression under that mask of hers that meant Wanda should probably be expecting at the least, traditionally jewish food at christmas dinner. 

“So ice cream?” Peter interjected excitedly. 

Wanda felt peaceful, her head on Daisy’s shoulder as they sat on a shipping container. Peter slinging himself through the training gauntlet. She hadn’t had roots, real roots like this since before. Just before. Before Ultron, before Hydra, before the bombs. 

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Daisy shifted. 

She sighed, straightening so she could turn and look at her girlfriend. “I noticed something in the apartment this morning.” 

“What? Did Pietro bring home a girl again?” There was laughter in her voice, a light to her eyes that said she was happy and relaxed. 

Wanda really hated that there was a chance this would change that. “No, he’s been spending most of his time in the labs bothering Darcy.” She had accepted her brother was going to come home with green hair or without eyebrows or something someday soon. “I realized you have a couple drawers in my room. And a lockbox for your guns, and there is a very hideous zombie coffee mug.” 

“Yeah?” Daisy’s head cocked to the side slightly, her brow furrowed ever so slightly. “And you’re using more of my closet than I am and we have those weird crackers you like in the pantry. I mean you’ve got a seat at the table that’s just your seat?” 

Wanda resisted reaching out to touch Daisy with her powers. It wasn’t...she needed words for this. “You’re aware we essentially live together?” 

“The agreement to stop trying shower sex because even with powers one of us was going to get a concussion was a sign?” Daisy’s lips twitched upwards in amusement only for her to still unnaturally, the very air stilling around them as well. “You did know that right?” 

Wanda reached out taking Daisy’s hand and squeezing firmly. “I hadn’t but I was unsure how you’d react to it. We haven’t been dating long enough that it would be typical for us to be doing so.” She watched her girlfriend’s face. “I’m not upset, slightly confused at how we ended up moving this quickly when we started...slow.” 

Understanding dawned on Daisy’s face, her emotions flowing easily instead of being tightly held in. She laughed. “I think that may be my fault. I’ve always crammed relationships into down time and admittedly now it’s sort of almost all down time.” 

“That...no that doesn’t make sense. What?” Wanda relaxed though, it wasn’t the response she’d been expecting but that was a good thing. Still baffling. 

Daisy grinned. “Wanda think about my past relationships, I mean Miles and I were probably good? I mean we were fairly stable for cyber terrorists who traveled a lot and only really spent a dozen weekends holed up in shitty hotels. Most of our relationship was via the web. Before that what, fooling around in high school? Then Ward who I just flirted with between missions. Really, typical SHIELD relationships burn hot for short periods of time.” 

Shifting, Daisy closed off ever so slightly, but not all the way. The pain was palpable even to Wanda without her powers. 

“Lincoln and I..it was so busy. We were barely friends and then at war with each other and then I spent so long convincing him to come in. Then we had so little time together. And what we did was crushed into training and evenings afterwards. It wasn’t that long between us starting and Hive.” Daisy looked away. 

Wanda considered what she knew of typical relationships, frankly she hadn’t had the time herself back in Sokovia. But it made sense. Inside SHIELD everyone lived in tight quarters. The only privacy to be found was the bunks, and even then only senior agents had private quarters. A relationship for an agent would have to be typically passionate, but brief. Missions or death ending things, and everyone knowing the likely end. “I am sorry you lost him.” 

“So am I.” Daisy looked back at her, smile tight. “Not that..” 

“I know.” Wanda knew that Daisy loved her. It wasn’t a contest, and even if it was Daisy loved so completely once she let herself it would be foolish to ask. “I love you, and I am sorry you lost him.” 

Daisy leaned in kissing her chastely. Her emotions slammed against Wanda like a freight train though. 

Gasping Wanda pulled back, her eyes burning with tears that were not her own. “Daisy?” 

“I love you.” Daisy reached up cupping the side of her face. “I am so, so grateful for this, what we have.” 

Wanda reached grabbing Daisy’s shoulders, pulling her so close her breath whispered past Daisy’s face. “Always. I’m not going anywhere.” 

She felt like she was burning as Daisy pulled their mouths back together. Her powers boiled with it as they connected. She felt the stars and the earth, their powers merging as they burned. Pain, and love and loss and hope all mixing, turning between and within them. 

Daisy pressed as Wanda pulled. Wanda barely noticed as her back hit the top of the container they’d been sitting on. She was too caught up in the feedback loop they’d created to care, she just needed Daisy closer. It ached and consumed. 

All things considered it was probably a good thing they were too caught up to properly start ripping clothing off. Definitely a very good thing. 

“OH MY GOD MY EYES! THAT’S MY SISTER!”


	39. Red Nose's and Robin Sees the Future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup! Guys uh...so hey I'm mostly not sorry. That uh angst tag guys, it's been waiting to be relevant. And uh...next few chapters are uh...oops.

Peter dropped onto the top of the cop car. “Hey!” 

“Spiderman!” The police officer spun on his heel in surprise, but seemed pleased. “I almost thought Detective Watanabe had to be going on when she said you’d be here for this.” 

He blinked. “You mean Yuri right? Cause she doesn’t like being called Detective Watanabe.”

“She almost used a stapler on Peterson’s head when he tried to call her Yuriko…” The officer stared at him in disbelief. “How are you alive?” 

Peter felt a thrill of delight. “Ha! I knew she liked me.” He bounced off the top of the car holding out his hand. “Nice to meetcha! I’m Spiderman.” 

“Jefferson Davis.” Davis shook his hand, his face doing a slight twitch of disbelief. 

He pretended to look around like he hadn’t done a quick circuit to ensure everything was secure before dropping down. “So everything looking good?” 

“We’re not expecting much of that to change.” Davis crossed his arms looking at the building and several dozen police cruisers sitting around as they all waited. 

Peter kinda wished he’d been sent as backup with Daisy against the enhanced Mafia Don. But earning trust back. Also best to be on the scene for the three who had a meeting here today. He got why he was here. “So we just wait while everyone gets arrested right?”

“Basically. This isn’t the dangerous bit.” Davis settled back into leaning against the cruiser. “It's good to know we’ve got you and Quake watching our backs. The ones we don’t arrest today are going to be looking for vengeance.” His face turned serious. “And it's going to create a power vacuum.” 

His shoulders tightened the hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. He felt danger there. Peter brushed it off. They could handle it. “We’ve got this.”

“Good to know.” Davis looked at him oddly. “I do have to ask, do you need the sweaters?”

His cheeks flushed under his mask. “They’re spider-ific.” 

Peter pouted as he poked at his dinner. “But that was so anti-climatic! I only got to web that one guy’s arm who tried to go for a gun.” 

“Yeah I shot my Don in the face with a dendrotoxin round and that was just kind of it.” Daisy agreed, her nose wrinkling. “I mean usually there’s more violence before we get to the arresting part...but we did good getting evidence.” She held up a hand for him.

He high fived her. “Hero-ing is..way more boring than advertised….like 80% is like...waiting.” 

“No complaining the mafia didn’t shoot at you.” May chided while grabbing a diner roll. “I’m just glad it’s all settled now.” 

Daisy winked at him. “We’ll just need to spend more time visibly there to keep an eye out for reprisals.” 

“Everyone ready for tomorrow?” Darcy cut in before Aunt May could protest again.

May smiled at Darcy. “I’ve got the day off, and I already called the school for you Peter.” 

He perked up. “I’m so jealous.” Peter looked at Darcy. “Do you think they’d let me run it just for fun?” 

“You can ask.” Darcy snorted. “But it’s a total cheat.” 

Which...Peter sighed. “You’re right. I couldn’t do it before so I shouldn’t do it now.” 

“I’m sure you can run it before the cameras turn on.” May offered. “Which Natasha, Maria, Melinda and I will be watching live at the tower.”

Peter paused. “Wait, you’re friends with the Black Widow!?” 

“She’s friends with Maria.” May explained like that just made sense. 

Darcy snickered. “Supes cool crowd there May. You’ve even got Daisy’s May there. Which we’ll stop by afterwards.”

“Thank you.” May’s smile was amused but slightly proud. “I’m not completely uncool.” 

Peter grinned. “You’re the coolest.” 

“And don’t you forget it.” May teased gently while passing him the salad. “And eat more greens. I don’t care if you’re a superhero you still have to eat salad.” 

Daisy cleared her throat slightly. “So uh...I wanted to ask. It's fine how often Wanda is here?” 

“Of course.” May reached out and squeezed Daisy’s hand. 

Peter frowned slightly, he was missing something important. He cringed at the mention of Wanda. He liked her, he really did. Apparently he was very lucky his sister was a spy with vibration powers. Once was enough as far as walking in on them. Or swinging in because shipping containers were not bedrooms. He could feel his face heating. Just so gross. “She’s coming tomorrow right?” 

“Pietro has a test day after tomorrow so he won’t be there.” Darcy chimed in. 

Daisy’s shoulders relaxed further, which Peter really had missed something there. “Wanda’s coming. She’ll keep you two company.” 

“You mean cheer you on and enjoy seeing you in a crop top?” Darcy snarked before popping a bite of potato into her mouth. 

Peter shivered. “So gross.” 

////

Kyle was ecstatic, it was time and his Red Nose partner was going to kick ass! And she could, literally and figuratively. He elbowed Mindy Williams in the side. “We’re going to kick your team’s ass.” 

“You got a superhero.” She rolled her eyes, though she bounced on her toes as excited as he was for the event. “I got an actor with muscles that are for show.” 

He gave a slightly critical glance at where her actor was currently texting on his phone. Mindy was right, man would have almost no endurance once he was on the obstacles. “How many do you think he’ll manage?” 

“He’ll get three, maybe four of them.” She rolled her shoulders. “I can cover for the rest. What about you, Quake as impressive as she looks on tv?” 

“More.” Kyle wasn’t worried she hadn’t popped up yet. If he knew her, she was deftly avoiding the camera crew till the last minute. “She’s good, really good. If this was for real, in our normal season I wouldn’t bet against her making one of the top times. If she subs me in for any of these it’s cause she’s hiding an injury.”

His friend and fellow ninja competitor stared at him. “Seriously?” 

“Yup. She’s gonna blow through the course.” He bounced on the balls of his feet. “We’ve been doing rock climbing mostly and some aerial work. For all the flying all over the place she does, it's obviously new to her. We spent two hours on the trampolines last week just for fun.” 

Mindy slapped his shoulder. “That’s just not fair. I like my guy but he’s not as fit as he thinks he is. Was hilarious to watch him fall off the obstacles the first time he tried them all.” She snickered. 

“Good for the ego though.” Kyle chuckled as he saw the cameras being set up as everyone continued preparing. He spotted Quake sitting in the rafters. Stepping forward he cupped his hands around his mouth. “HOW YA DOING UP THERE?”

There was an audible groan. And then Quake dropped from the rafters only to land easily. The ground barely rattled beneath his feet. She was getting freakishly better at that. She raised a brow at him. “Really?” 

“Like I was going to let you hide up there.” He clapped her on the shoulder. “Come on and meet everyone.” 

She sighed, but easily let him pull her towards the other professional ninjas and various famous individuals participating in the charity run. “Fine, but think you can let Spiderman run the course afterwards? He’s kind of a big fan and disappointed his abilities would make it unfair to let him compete.” 

Kyle looked at her and then laughed. “I’m sure they’d be thrilled.” He gave a second glance at her outfit. It was...well damn. She was wearing a comfortable and reasonably modest black sports bra with a yellow crop top over the top. Her skintight work out three quarter length pants were black, but the panels on the sides were red and blue with black spider webbing. “Oh wow you’re really going for the Spiderquake thing aren’t you?” 

“Eh, I accidently traumatized him the other day and kinda owed him one.” Quake shrugged easily. The usual fond and blatantly affectionate tone to her voice when she spoke of him was easy to hear. “So who all am I meeting?” 

He beamed, slinging his arm over her shoulders. Hopefully the others wouldn’t stare at the many, frankly concerningly many, scars that littered her exposed skin. He’d had weeks of gym time to adjust to four visible bullet scars, stabbing scars and a lot of what he was pretty sure were knife or glass inflicted injuries. “Mindy! Come meet our own resident superhero!” 

Kyle felt like everything was electric. The announcer's commentary was filling the stands, people cheering, his friends and fellow ninjas eagerly grouped up together. He quickly checked Quake hadn’t tried to disappear anywhere again. 

“Not going anywhere.” She whispered into his ear. 

He lept straight up a solid two feet with a yelp while spinning around. “Don’t do that!” Kyle clasped his hand to his heart. “You’re going to end up running this on your own if you keep that up.” 

“But so amusing.” Quake grinned. 

One of the actors, Jake, spoke up. “Ok it’s been bothering me. Why don’t you swing around on webs like Spiderman?” 

“The centrifical force would rip my arms out of my sockets.” Quake snorted while dropping her hands on her hips. “Spiderman’s almost as sturdy as Cap. I may have the least controlled method of flight ever but it’s certainly better than risking my shoulders like that.” 

Mindy whistled. “Damn, makes sense though. No spiderweb slinging for us normal people someday then.” 

“Sadly no.” Quake laughed easily, everyone seemed to be treating her as just another one of them. It was funny seeing it from this perspective. She did slide into the group easily. “Monkey bars do still exist.” 

Kyle shook his head. “Not as cool as webs.” 

Darcy Stark made a sound of surprise as she elbowed her way in. “Adrenaline junkies the lot of you. But travel by web is the worst. Almost as bad as if this one tries to fly you somewhere. Feels like your teeth are going to rattle out of your head.” 

“Oh you’ve gotten to travel via hero?” Jake gave the woman an appreciative look. “How’d you manage that?” 

Darcy just met his gaze without blinking. “Who do you think made the high tech bullet proof suits? Rescue from the paps is a fringe benefit.” She turned her gaze on Quake. “You, kick the course’s ass. I’m off to cheer with the others.” 

“I got it, make sure SI has to donate as much as possible.” Quake had an amused smirk on her face.

Darcy gave them all a lazy salute before trotting off back to where the other family and friends here to cheer their favorite ninjas on were sitting. 

Kyle gave a whistle. “So, chances of you getting me her number as thanks for being the bestest ninja trainer ever?” 

“You can ask her yourself.” Quake patted his shoulder. “If you do, be on your best behavior. Spiderman might just show you exactly how his webs work if you’re not.” 

Kyle ignored the snickers from the others. Because he knew Quake wasn’t dating Spiderman. If they weren’t together….oh yeah no he wasn’t going to hit on Spiderman’s possible girlfriend. Just no. He liked life. Thank you very much. And possible shovel talk by Ironman sounded awful if he was wrong. Either way, bad idea. “I think I’m good.” 

“Smart choice.” Quake turned towards Jake. “What are you guys using for fake blood on your sets? Because it looks startlingly realistic.” 

Jake looked slightly surprised. “I have no idea, you’d have to ask the prop department. But I think I’m up.” 

“Come on snazzy pants.” Jake’s trainer hooked his arm through Jakes and pulled him towards the stage. 

Kyle was half vibrating as the clock started. He hopped and then jogged along the side as Quake took off for the course.

////

Daisy felt like laughing. Darcy, Peter and Wanda were on the sidelines happily cheering. Someone, and it had to have been Darcy had made a ‘Quake’ sign. Kyle looked like he was going to bounce out of his skin from excitement and adrenaline. And to be quite frank the energy and mood of the crowd was infectious. As soon as the timer started she took off at a comfortable jog. 

The floating steps, or giant steps standing out of the water were easy enough. Her pace didn’t slow at all as she hit the first step easily pushing herself to the next. It was satisfying. As she hit the last step she launched herself forward, catching the hanging rope. Her momentum swung her forward to the platform. 

She stopped to wave at the crowd. Daisy stepped to the next obstacle and grabbed onto the red cannonball hanging from a chain. Once she was on it was just a matter of hanging on till it had slid her down the rail. Hanging onto Peter was far more terrifying, also there weren't convenient pools of water underneath when it was Peter. She made sure it wasn’t damp, and then swung herself forward and held on. 

There was a lurch halfway down the rail and then she was sliding the last few feet. Releasing her grip she landed lightly on her feet. Daisy didn’t stop to wave though, she felt like showing off. It was so rare to be free to do so. And this next one was honestly one she’d had to work to learn. 

Jumping off the platform she caught the first of the wheels. The Fly Wheels were a series of rotating wheels that had to be swung from. Extreme monkey bars in a way. She caught the narrow, inch wide hand holds of the first wheel. Using her momentum she sent herself flying to the next one. 

Daisy could hear the commentators yelling, Kyle was cheering from the side, shouting reminders to control her body. It was invigorating. This, no danger just getting to do this for the fun of it! She took a swing to rebuild momentum before releasing. 

Flying through the air she caught the third wheel. Two forward and back swings and she released, arching through the air for the platform. And damn, she was feeling it now. She jogged towards the next one, controlling her breathing. Besides, Block run had to be taken at speed. The faster you went the less the unsteady steps could send you toppling into the water. 

Her feet barely hit the rotating blocks before she was taking her next step. She ran straight through it without a fumble. It was like combat, sometimes stopping to breathe was to lose. And she was going to crush this. It felt important to win now...or go as far as possible. Besides, Jake of the tv star fame had made it all the way past the Salmon Ladder, even if his trainer had subbed in for him on a few obstacles. 

She didn’t pause, just leaping up into the Battering Ram. Her arms locked around the red grip. Her momentum carried her and the battering ram forward a foot down the pole. Daisy was breathing heavy as she hung in the air. But this was doable. Using her core she propelled herself and the battering ram down the pole. As soon as she was close enough she swung herself forward, releasing the first one and grabbing the second battering ram to the second. 

“YOU GOT THIS!” Kyle shouted from the side where he was running along with her progress. He’d been punching the air for every obstacle she got past. 

Daisy grinned, and then propelled herself forward. Two sliding umpfs of the battering ram and she was able to swing off to the next platform. Shaking her arms out she stepped off the steps to the ground, looking up at the Warped Wall. It was a vertical run up to an overhanging lip. If she failed this one May would have her head. 

Leaning back she looked up the wall. Breathing in she exhaled, forcing her heart rate to slow. And then she sprinted the handful of feet she had to build momentum and ran up the wall till she was forced to push off, jumping towards the lip. Her hands both easily caught the lip. A victorious grin on her face she pulled herself up and over the wall. 

“Hey, think I can get further than Jake?” She grinned at the commenters in their box. 

Daisy laughed, her hair still slightly damp as she followed Kyle backstage to grab her bag. It was cold enough and she wasn’t going home while still wet. And she liked him enough to want to ensure he made it safely back to his car. “Well I almost did it.” 

“Hey, you made it further than most of us do. The Flying Dragon is killer.” Kyle tossed her a second towel. “You made it to the second to the last obstacle. With your time you’d have qualified if you’d just run as a competitor.” 

She grinned, bumping their shoulders together. “I don’t think your judges would let me run for real. I might not be enhanced like Spiderman but I’m not exactly human either.” 

“Eh you just make things shake.” He started to raise his water bottle towards his mouth. 

Daisy caught his arm. She raised an eyebrow and glanced pointedly at his water bottle. 

He frowned slightly but held it out towards her. “What?” 

“I can do more than just make things shake.” She touched the plastic of the bottle and concentrated. Her eyes closed. It was hard, and honestly she was still getting the hang of it. The complete control necessary was...it was slow going. But she slowed the vibrations in the bottle. 

Opening her eyes she pulled her hand away from the frozen water, her breath coming out in a cloud of mist. “I’m still working on it.” 

Kyle’s eyes widened. “Holy shit.” 

“Yup.” Daisy rolled her shoulders, the small area of cold air she’d accidently created fading to just the ambient temperature. Which to be fair wasn’t exactly warm. “It’s not earthquakes or shockwaves that I control. It's the vibrations between molecules. Still, I kinda suck at using it like that right now.” 

He blinked. “That is so awesome. But wait, what does that have to do with you not being able to run the course for real?” 

Which, she laughed. “I guess nothing.” Daisy considered it. “Who knows, I’ll mention it to Darcy. If I do it’ll be fun to run against you.” 

“Hey now you got further than me tonight, then I did in qualifying this year.” He groaned. “I’ve made it harder for myself.” 

Daisy patted his shoulder as they walked towards his car. It was late, they’d had to hang back to finish up paperwork for the whole thing leaving most of the crowds from the event long gone. “It’d be fun.” She considered him. “You do know now that I’ve done this at least a couple of the field agents are going to want to try. I wasn’t kidding about us watching the show between missions.” 

“I’m both excited and terrified.” Kyle slung his arm around her shoulders hauling her into a slightly awkward side hug. “You’re kinda the best celebrity I could have gotten.” 

Her nose scrunched up in distaste. “I really don’t think of myself as a celebrity. I’m just doing my job.” 

“Huh, huh. Who was it who signed like a hundred autographs tonight?” His voice was full of good natured humor. “You were cute with the kids.” 

“Thanks.” She brushed some of her hair behind one ear. “It's weird, before SHIELD I would have loved to be a hero. The whole public and in the media thing. But now it just feels...like an itch I can’t reach.” 

Kyle looked at her curiously. “I mean, I don’t know a lot but you were like a spy right? I’d think being noticed was probably bad.” 

“So bad.” Daisy snickered. “Although I was part of one op where we were investigating corruption, Hydra and a possible alien artifact inside a Chinese music company. I got sent in as a prospective pop star. God they even released a single with me in it before we finished the op. I don’t think the team ever let me or will ever let me live that one down.” 

He froze staring at her with wide eyes, a delighted smile on his face. “Are you saying there is a video of you as a popstar somewhere?” 

“You’ll never find it.” She grinned, and he wouldn’t. After the op she’d purposely fucked with the algorithms on every music site to make it so her song did not come up if you looked for it. You’d have to really scroll while knowing the title to find it. Or have way too much time on your hands. Obscure had been the key there. 

His eyes were bright as he looked at her. “Oh I’m going to find it.” 

“Good luck with that.” She turned on her heel continuing the walk towards his car. “Which, how far out did you park?” 

Kyle rolled his eyes. “We’re in good shape, no need to get snippy. And you’re the one insisting to walk me back to my car like some kind of damsel in distress.” 

“Damsel in distress?” Daisy gave him a playful up down flick of her eyes. “We’d have to get you a dress.” 

Kyle tipped his chin up. “I’ll have you know I’d be gorgeous in a dress.” 

Daisy laughed, that man had far too much frat boy energy for that to be anything short of comical. She spotted his shitty coup as they reached the parking lot he’d used. Her laughter didn’t so much as hitch as she noted an inconsistency. 

Standing in the lot, looking straight at them, was a man in a business suit. He wasn’t dressed for the weather, no sweater, no jacket, just a plain black suit, black tie, and white shirt. Nothing about him was too nice, nor was it cheap. Exactly, perfectly forgettable. It was like looking at Coulson, your eyes just naturally slid over him. Which meant everything in Daisy went on alert. 

She let herself check the surrounding rooftops out of the corners of her eyes, no obvious snipers, but that didn’t mean much. Slowly she started to take control of the very vibrations in the air around them. This man was waiting for her, and he’d known to wait by Kyle’s car. “Kyle, do exactly what I tell you.” Her voice had turned sharp, commanding. 

“Wait, what?” He looked at her in confusion but she felt more than saw his metaphorical hackles rising. 

Daisy didn’t dare stop clocking in every person, and sign of this being a trap. There were security cameras, and a shop’s cameras that would cover the lot. Which made it far less likely this was a hit. CIA intimidation tactic possibly? Government was likely, it may be late but this was the city, and a financially prosperous section of it. Terrible spot for a fight economically, or if you wanted any privacy. There were people around after all, no matter how late. Still, she could protect Kyle better if he was close. “Stay behind me, if I tell you to run, run. Do you understand?” 

“Yeah, right, I can do that.” Kyle’s vibrations tightened. “It’s creepy business dude who’s looking at us?” 

She kept herself loose. “This is a terrible spot for an ambush, I believe he just wants to talk. But if something happens you run to the grocery store back there. Do you understand?” 

“And call the cops.” Kyle carefully fell just behind her shoulder.

Daisy mentally braced herself as they got closer. It was the best she could do. As they came close enough to speak comfortably to the man she hit her beacon to alert Peter and Darcy something was wrong. “You’re not particularly subtle are you?”

“I was not attempting to avoid your notice Daisy Johnson.” The man’s expression was wrong, blank in a way that rang as just...empty. “I did not mean to startle you. I am Noah.” 

She narrowed her eyes, her name certainly wasn’t a secret, very hard to find and unconfirmed, but not impossible. Especially if you were in the intelligence community. Yuri having a friend/contact who could tell her was one thing, this was another. “Who are you with, CIA?” 

“I am not with anyone. I am an anthropologist.” He stepped forward. “The prophet indicated I should find you.” 

Daisy could feel the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end. His vibrations were wrong, so wrong. It was like feeling the LMDs or the Ironsuits not a person. “Prophet?”

“The father gave you the vision of what once would have been your death.” Noah replied blandly. 

Robin. He was talking about Robin. Her eyes narrowed. “I’m sure you understand if harm has come to her you won’t like what will happen.” 

“I do not intervene.” Noah pulled a wooden robin from his pocket. “This token was willingly surrendered that you would not harm me.” He held it out easily. 

Daisy recognized it, the wooden toy she’d delivered to Robin once before. If the Hintons needed help she owed it to them. And if they’d interacted with the man before her they needed her. “Right, I’m sure you’ll understand I’ll need to confirm that.” 

“That is expected.” He replied. 

She eyed him warily but took the toy. Sudden ice spread from her fingers up her arm. She had a fraction of a second to recognize the feeling of dendrotoxin before the world went black.


	40. And It Had All Been Going So Well

Peter ducked a punch towards his face. Spinning he kicked the thug across the alley and into a wall while grabbing the second thug’s arm and flipping the man over his head into the ground. Two quick webs and they were incapacitated. He narrowed his eyes, triple checking everything was secure. Fifth organized mugging he’d stopped today. He clicked one of the disposable beacons for Yuri on the forehead of mafia thug number one. 

Nodding, he jumped up, catching the wall and climbed quickly up the side to the roof. He hit his comm. “The mugging report on twelfth is handled.” 

-”Tony’s back. We’re waiting for you at the tower.”- Darcy’s voice was clipped. 

His mouth tightened. He didn’t bother replying, just took off running. As he reached the edge of the roof he lept, throwing himself towards the tower, shooting a web to swing himself forward. It didn’t feel fun today.

Peter swung through the window. He barely did more than pull his mask off. “Did you find anything!?” 

“No.” Tony was worn, nearly haggard as he dropped an array on the table, it’s hinges opening as it folded itself out. “Any residual readings of whatever that franken portal was, are gone.” 

Darcy plugged her computer in and started to download the data. “I’ll give this to Jane.” She looked up. “Rhodey will get back with the west coast readings when?” 

“Eight hours.” Tony bit out. 

Darcy threw a screwdriver at the wall. It clanged loudly. “Fuck.” She ran a hand through her hair. “The portal he used to get away. It shouldn’t exist. It's a disgusting overpowered fake. It's unstable and an amature attempt at creating an Einstein Rosen bridge.” 

“Not of Earth or Asgard. Which leaves us unable to identify where that tech is from..” Tony agreed, he sneered at the image of the golden circle that had created the portal that had sucked away their sister. His daughter. “Just punch a hole in the fabric of space, not like that could swallow a planet.” 

Darcy gave an aggravated nod. “It's a shitty knock off of an einstein rosen bridge by someone who doesn’t know what the fucknuggest they’re doing.” 

Peter glared at the screens all frozen on different surveillance angles of Daisy. “Anything from SHIELD? Dr Simmons isn’t getting back to me.” His jaw tightened. 

Darcy shook her head. “Hunter went to contact them because he remembered an inhuman with future visions who died. He hasn’t come back yet.” 

They all snapped their heads around to Natasha striding into the room. He couldn’t help it. “Did you find anything?” 

“You all need to calm down.” Natasha eyed them. “This Noah needs her for something. You’re no good to her if you’re too exhausted to think.” 

Tony turned. “We’re not all so heartless we can be calm when our family has been kidnapped by aliens.” 

“Daisy is a powerful inhuman, a highly trained agent, and one of the best hackers on the planet. If there’s a chance at escape she’ll take it. And we know this Noah needs her for something. I’m being practical.” Natasha shut the door behind her as she walked the rest of the way in.

Peter’s brow furrowed. “How do we know he won’t hurt her?”

“Dendrotoxin soaked toy to incapacitate without injury, clearly planned out grab, he attempted to establish a non-hostile rapport, and he didn’t just drag her off. He caught her and carried her through the portal. That all says care was taken to keep her intact.” Natasha raised a brow at them all. “He wanted her unharmed and as non-aggressive as possible. That’s good, it means torture and murder are unlikely, at least in the short term. But it means we have likely a week at least before she’ll be in real danger.” 

It was...it was something. Peter unclenched ever so slightly. He didn’t…. “Are you just here to tell us to sleep?” 

“No, I got word from a source in SHIELD.” She tossed a thumbdrive to Tony. “Agents Coulson, May, Simmons, Rodrigez, and MacKenzie were all taken last night as well. No footage of that one, but I have the initial reports. They all vanished from a diner. Except for May who never checked into her hotel last night.” 

Darcy caught what was wrong about that first. “Wait, that’s her entire old team except for Fitz.” 

“Fitz went MIA following what is believed to be a lead at around five am this morning.” Natasha eyed them. “Whoever this Noah is, he's picked very specific individuals. None of whom would be easy to hold.” 

Tony crossed his arms as the incident report came up on the screen. His eyes skimming the material. “No reference to a ‘prophet’ in this one.” 

“Hunter was looking into that. As was Wanda.” Darcy didn’t mention Wanda’s powers meant she was frighteningly competent at hitting every known location of alien citizens in the city and ensuring they were being honest about whether they had any knowledge or not.

Peter looked at Natasha. “Why do you think they were taken?” 

“I’m not sure.” Her eyes turned to the screens. “It’s not coercion. This Noah knows too much about his targets for that.” She seemed to notice the lack of understanding on their faces. “If I wanted Daisy to do something for me against her will I’d have taken you or Darcy to hold as hostages to ensure she complied. Coulson could stand as leverage against the majority of the team. But not all of them, and he’s a spy. Not an ideal hostage.” 

Natasha seemed to frown ever so slightly. “If I had to guess, I’d think he wanted their specific assistance. That he believes once forced to confront what he needs help with, they will comply of their own free will. But that seems unlikely. Daisy would have been conscious for hours by now. All of them would be. And every SHIELD agent knows how to get a message out with only minor tech available. None of them have sent out any type of message.” 

“Which means they can’t.” Peter finished for her. Afterall, Daisy had been training him. Learning how to signal for help, to indicate if he was in danger, that had been one of the first lessons. He felt a sick pit in his stomach. 

Darcy went pale. “If they were in space how much harder would it be to get that sort of signal out?” 

“Can you get Thor here?” Tony turned on her immediately. “Is that something you can do yet?” 

She straightened. “Yeah, I can do that. I don’t care if I have to drag him here by his stupid cape myself.” 

////

Hunter stared at Fitz. He had not flown to the west coast, hunted down Fitz, helped him chase down an alien, held said alien at gunpoint, met a creepy kid who drew the future, all of that for this. “Your plan is what?” 

“I’m going to put myself into cryo-sleep so I can get to the others.” Fitz’s face was frighteningly set. 

His eyes flicked to the bald alien who had kidnapped their friends. It was only slightly concerning he had no idea where the other one who’d taken Daisy and probably May was. “Shouldn’t we talk to someone else? I mean the Avengers are a hive of hornets. I mean Daisy’s girlfriend is a terrifying witch who was looking awfully murdery when I left. Don’t you think one of them might have a better idea?” 

The bald alien spoke up. “I will be accompanying Leopold Fitz. His and the SHIELD team’s mission is vital to the survival of the species.” 

“Yeah that doesn’t make me feel better buddy.” Hunter stared at Fitz. “You’re sure about this? Can we even trust this bloke?” He jerked a thumb towards the alien. “Cause I don’t wanna be the one to tell everyone this is the plan for saving the team. Did I mention the terrifying witchy girlfriend and want to be megalomaniac of a mad scientist sister?” 

////

Jane didn’t comment on her best friend’s manic intensity as they prepared to send Pietro and Wanda to Asgard to drag Thor back with them. Instead she stepped to the twins, she’d already ensured the math was correct afterall. The rest was Darcy calibrating and adjusting the tech. No, for all she missed a lot of social cues, even she knew that the twins weren’t ok. 

It might have something to do with the fact Wanda’s eyes were red and she was leaking tendrils of red mist. Though really Jane was going to have to convince the girl to let her take some readings because she had theories about what that mist was. But anyways, Pietro was jittery in a way that made his edges seem to blur here and there. Their heads were bent together as if they were speaking quietly, but their mouths weren’t moving. Altogether it pinged as wrong even to Jane. Ian was scared of Pietro after the coffee incident and Erik, bless his heart, wasn’t wearing pants. Which left Jane as the one who had to...wade into emotional social waters.

Jane cleared her throat. “You do know we haven’t transported a human since the Pietro incident?” 

“We’re aware.” Wanda’s voice was tight, her accent thick in a way that hinted at danger. 

Jane was...unsure of what to say to that. It wasn’t a theoretical integer. Maybe she needed to get out of the lab more? “You may need to convince Heimdal to return you with Thor. We will open the portal on the hour every hour. And we’ve managed to increase output to...the portal will stay open slightly longer now. But we don’t have Daisy to keep it wedged open.” 

Pietro spoke up. “Thank you for the warnings, but we are going. We will find Thor and if necessary incapacitate and drag him back with us.” 

“Ah...he’s really quite nice. He should agree to come back without violence.” Jane hedged carefully. 

Pietro winced slightly. “I apologize, he is your boyfriend.” 

“Former.” Jane felt her chin tipping up slightly. “I told him I needed a partner who was here, he went home and has not sent word. I said I wouldn’t wait for him again. He doesn’t have a relationship to come back to.” She noted the look in Pietro’s eye. “But he is still a hero. He should come back to protect Midgard if it is asked of him.” 

“I do not care what he is. We need him, so we will bring him back with us.” Wanda’s eyes literally flashed red as she stepped into the portal room. Her brother on her heels. 

Jane sighed, she gave up. This was why she prefered to stay in the lab. She stepped back to where Darcy was. “Are we ready?” 

“Yes.” Darcy flipped it on. 

Jane handed Darcy a poptart. “We’re going to find her.”

“I just...she’s my sister ya know?” Darcy looked at her, blues eyes wide with helplessness. 

Jane took her best friend’s hand. “Thor will help. Erik and I adjusted everything so if anyone makes a portal like that again we’ll know about it.” She couldn’t keep her disgust at the shitty excuse for a portal out of her voice. Damn thing was a gross failure to even comprehend the beauty of what it was failing to attempt. It insulted science with its existence. 

Darcy twitched slightly. “Daisy is the one who handles just..this sort of thing.” Her eyes were misty. “It’s so stupid, it hasn’t even been a year but…” 

“She’s your sister.” Jane replied. It wasn’t a bond she exactly understood, she was an only child herself. But she saw it between others and she knew to Darcy it meant the world. That the trio were bound by not just blood but love as well. Jane needed something that wasn’t astrophysics or was going to cause Darcy to actually lose it and start crying. “Should we be worried for Thor?” 

“Big Guy can handle it.” Darcy leaned against her, fuzzy knit hat scratching at Jane’s cheek. “I’m still mad at him for leaving.” 

Jane nodded, wrapping an arm around Darcy. “So am I.”

////

Natasha just waited as she watched Tony creating a computer program with FRIDAY. She had no doubt it was highly illegal. She knew enough to know it was for improved facial recognition using cameras he shouldn’t have access to, while hunting for Noah. It would help. So she didn’t say anything. 

“I can feel you judging.” Tony’s voice was snide as he kept working, eyes not even leaving the screen. 

Natasha raised a brow. “I left messages with my contacts. If anyone hears something they’ll let me know.” She stepped forward. “How does the new alert system work?”

“If his face is spotted on a camera anywhere, everyone is alerted. Closest person to him is informed they are the closest. He can’t hide on this planet forever.” Tony almost knocked his untouched glass of scotch with his elbow as he grabbed a tablet that was resting beside it. 

Natasha wasn’t sure she’d seen him too upset to drink before. “Steve is at the children’s hospital. It’ll keep the media’s eyes off of us for a few hours. He’s already talked to Hill. He’ll handle the pony show. If he stops being able to handle it alone Pietro and I can step in.” 

Tony looked over his shoulder at her. “What?” 

“Steve didn’t want to risk you turning down his offer to help.” She stepped closer, eyes running over the coding, pretending she couldn’t see this reaction. “Daisy is important to all of us.” 

Tony opened his mouth, it undoubtedly would have been something snarky and have ruined any sentimentality. Fortunately for everyone there was a beep on screen. Both of their eyes snapped to where the screen was showing an alert. On screen was security camera footage from the foyer of the tower. 

Natasha was pleasantly surprised when Tony looked at her as they stood outside the interrogation cell. 

His face was dark. “You question him.” 

“Not going to make a quip about me working for the enemy?” She eyed the very pissed but focused Darcy who Hill was strategically standing by. It would seem Natasha wasn’t the only one worried about pre-meditated murder by Stark. 

Tony’s eyes glinted. “I’ll kill him.”

“Well then.” Natasha easily stepped past everyone and into the room. She eyed the alien Noah. He was...unnaturally calm. 

He blinked as he looked at her. “Hello, I presume you are here to question me?” 

“I am.” Natasha didn’t ask her next question, it would be interesting to see how he responded to silence. 

Noah’s hands remained flat, not a single physical tell. It was like he was wearing the skin of a human and was unsure of how to move in it naturally, thus choosing not to move at all. “You were looking for me. Being made public would make my work difficult. I request that you desist from this.” 

“I see, why don’t you answer some questions and we’ll see about ceasing our pursuit before it becomes public?” She added some credence to the possibility that his species had required Daisy’s help. He was far too calm, clearly he did not believe he had done anything wrong. 

He gave a short slightly stiff nod. “Very well, I find this agreeable.” 

“Who and what are you?” Natasha crossed her arms leaning against the wall. The implied threat that he was wasting her time would probably be lost. But interesting to see if it was responded to.

Without so much as a twitch of reluctance he replied in the same banal tone. “My earth name is Noah. I’m a sentient Chronicom from a planet which revolves around a star in the constellation you know as Cygnus. I was sent here 30,000 years ago to observe and record the evolution of your species. What you would call an anthropologist.” 

“I see, and where is Quake and the rest of the SHIELD team you kidnapped?” She pushed off the wall stalking closer. 

His head cocked to the side. “You cannot retrieve them. They no longer exist as part of this time stream.” 

Her eyes narrowed slightly, she had a really bad feeling about where this was going. “Time stream?” 

“Yes, they are in the future. I do not know why, but the prophet spoke. It is required to prevent an extinction level event for your species. We are only permitted to interfere to prevent extinction of the species we are observing.” He explained in that same dry and unemotional voice. 

Natasha hoped someone had physically grabbed Tony. It was the only good reason for him not crashing through the glass. “And they are able to return once the threat to extinction is removed?” 

“I do not protect the prophet. I do not know.” He blinked at her. 

////

Darcy grabbed Hunter and dragged him into the room they were watching the interrogation from. “What the fuck took you so long?!”

"Hang on I got held up." And he did look exhausted and frankly ready to keel over. His eyes stilled as they spotted exactly who was in the interrogation room. "Oh thank god you got one of them."

Darcy did not release her hold on his arm. "What do you mean one of them?"

"There's two of them and just like….right first things first Daisy and the rest of them are fine."

She couldn't help it, she sagged. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Tony doing the same thing. Darcy's grip on his arm fell away. She patted his shoulder and hit the com. "Nat we need you for a minute."

Hunter dropped into a chair. "It's been a fucking day." He rubbed at his face. 

Darcy leaned against the wall. "Yeah well it's been fantastic over here." Her sarcasm bordered on actual venom.

"Right sorry." Hunter started as Natasha closed the interrogation room door. "I had some guesses when that loony went on about a prophet and Daisy listened to him. So I went out to SHIELD HQ to talk to Fitz, only then I had to hunt him down."

Hunter ran a hand through his hair. "There's an inhuman kid who sees all of time at the same time. Kid’s kinda fucked if you ask me, she can barely keep track of when in her life she is. But Daisy ran a mission to help her dad right before Bob and I left. Somehow the alien anthropologists found her and have been interrupting her drawing of the future. So when the kid draws the SHIELD team in the future, alien anthropologists kidnap the team and send them to the future."

"Is there a way to get them back?" Darcy felt her voice waiver. 

Hunter winced. "Sorta? That's what took so long. Fitz and I kinda sent him and one of the alien anthropologists to the future to help. But future drawing kid has drawings of the team back in the present. So we kinda know they get back?"

"You're joking." Tony grabbed Hunter by the front of his jacket and hauled him up. “My Daughter is lost in fucking TIME and you think a child’s drawings are enough!”

Darcy caught her father’s arm before Hill or Natasha intervened. “Dad, drop him.” She looked at Hunter. “How worried should we be?”

“It’s SHIELD, so 50% chance of the apocalypse, 50% chance of survival and no one knowing the planet almost ended.” He straightened his jacket. “But short of cryo-freezing more people to help them, it's done.” 

Darcy sucked in a breath, her eyes closing. “Correct me if I’m wrong. But short of inventing time travel what’s happened is done. Daisy and the others are in the future, we have reason to believe they’ll return, and two of the most brilliant scientists in the world not working for SI are with them.” She nodded to herself. It was shit. It was so much shit she couldn’t even. But it was par for the course with the super hero nonsense. “Do we know when they’ll be back?” 

“I’ve got the drawing.” Hunter pulled a folded up piece of paper and unfolded it carefully. It was just regular printer paper with crayon on it. But it showed Quake punching a...rhino maybe? In the face while next to who was clearly Spiderman. It certainly wasn’t something that had happened yet.

She grabbed Tony’s shoulder. “Ok, that’s flowers. Flowers means spring.” Darcy swallowed, her mouth felt dry. “We can invent time travel if they’re not back by June. That’s bullshit unreasonable but we could do it. Jane almost invented it by accident anyways. We finish the bridge and we’re half done with time travel.” She opened her eyes staring at Hunter. “What future apocalypse did they get sent to go stop?” 

Hunter winced. “Um… I mean it’s kids drawings and I have like photos of them but uh...the planet cracking like an egg? But also there were some blue people enslaving humans. So I think they’re stopping the genocide of humans by slave owning aliens post planet cracking like an egg.” 

Darcy’s fingers dug harder into Tony’s shoulder. “Right. We’re in the past. If they’re not back by June we fix everything. Just they’re alive. Daisy is going to be fine. Evil blue aliens. SHIELD eats up and spits those out for breakfast.” Her eyes snapped to Hill. “They do right?” 

“This is...unprecedented.” Hill surprisingly looked like she was in control somehow. “But portals to other planets worked out for them. I trust that this team will make it back.” 

She nodded, if she repeated it enough maybe she’d believe it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, for those of you who haven't watched AoS a quick breakdown of the AoS plotline that just happened. So in s5 of AoS the team gets kidnapped by the Chromicoms and sent to the future to save humanity from extinction. In the future humanity has been enslaved by the Kree after the planet was destroyed. Over the course of their time in the future they find out that Daisy is the one credited with destroying the planet. Its very terrible, no one has a good time. But they succeed, and then come back.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Halloween Stroll](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27169066) by [saya4haji](https://archiveofourown.org/users/saya4haji/pseuds/saya4haji)




End file.
